Ocean's 13 Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Ocean's 13 script is here for all you fans of the Steven Soderbergh movie. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Ocean's 13 quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.

Ocean's 13 Script

Valencia, CA 2:43 am



Where is he?

Gotta go.

What's the latest?

- Nothing. They say the first 24 hours...
- Right.

- Did she understand?
- It's not their fight.

Did she understand?

It's not their fight.

- Hey.
- Hey, Linus.

- Hey, where are Tess and Isabel?
- It's not their fight.

Any change?

He's in critical condition, but he's still
alive. You know, if he doesn't...

- Is Stan there?
- Yeah, he's been there an hour.

Stan'll tell us what's going on.

Myocardial infarction.

He's endured an incredible shock
to his system.

Can he recover? Yes.

Will he recover?

It helps if they have something
to live for.


Friends, then.

Maybe that'll be enough.

Reuben, when it comes to Willy Bank,
you can't rely on contracts.

My lawyers say they're ironclad.

Four weeks earlier...

- Give me credit for my business sechel.
- I don't think it's a good idea.

- Neither does Rusty.
- Well, I'm doing it. It's done.

And you tell Rusty that I won't have to
pull jobs to keep my hotel solvent.

Hey, Reuben.

You fellas are young.
You don't understand.

Do you know that the Inuit people
put their elders out on a ice floe...

...to die when they're too old to hunt?

That's just a myth.

Well, that ain't gonna happen to me.
I can still hunt.

This is it. It's my chance.
I used to mean something in this town.

I would walk into a restaurant.
If it was full...

...they'd snap out a new table
for me like that!

If you're worried
about your place in history...

...let us get a street
named after you, or a boulevard.

We can talk about that when I'm dead.

...I appreciate you coming this far
to see me, but I gotta do this.

- Reuben!
- Partner!

Oh, so good of you to come.

Of course. Of course.
Are there more items for my punch list?

I got so much energy,
I can hardly sleep from the excitement!

Where are you at on the visas
for the chefs?

My man in Washington says
they'll be stamped by the time we open.

- No, no, no. Not good enough.
- That's what I said.

Oh, that's good. And the chandeliers?

My ex-wife's new brother-in-law...
You don't need the details. It's done!

Half price. They're already
at the warehouse.

And because I know it mattered to you...

...I appeared before the city council.

The one-way street leading away
from the rear entrance...

...now leads toward the rear entrance.

- All roads lead to the Midas!
- This is perfect!

Great views up here.
Where's the partners' desk gonna be?

Oh, no partners' desk.

- Two desks?
- No two desks. One desk.

One chairman's desk. One.

The arrangement is changing.

Was changed. As a matter of fact,
there is no arrangement.

Everybody said that
you would try to screw me.

That you done it
to every one of your partners.

But I defended you. I said, "No!

Me and Willy Bank been around
long enough...

...that we both shook Sinatra's hand.

And there's a code among guys
that shook Sinatra's hand."

Screw Sinatra's hand.

- Screw...?
- You're dead weight.

You think I'm gonna carry you
and pay you at the same time?

Reuben, you're out!

- Never. This is my land.
- Was. Was your land.

- You signed it over to the corporation.
- For 50-percent interest!

Which I'm gonna ask you
to sign over to me...

...for a small cash payment.

I'm not signing that.

Get out of here. I'm not signing that.

- Are you gonna throw me off the roof?
- Well, I don't want to.

This is wrong. This is all wrong.

You're leaving me with nothing.

You know, you're right. And it's rude.


It's the first batch.

Just got made.

You changed the name.

I like it better!

Don't you?


He always was too trusting.

- Is, Saul. Is.
- Of course. Is.

You try talking him out of it next time.

Look, Bank hurt Reuben.

I know how that makes me feel.
I know what that makes me wanna do.

I'm gonna get close to Bank,
and I don't care if it gets messy.

I'll drive you.
We'll get him leaving his barber.

- Then I'll inject him.
- I'll find a spot to get rid of the body.

All valid ideas.

Great initiative. But...

But even though Bank
stepped over the line...

...we have to do what's best
for Reuben.

Which means, we offer Bank
a Billy Martin.

What? He goes for it, and that's it?
He just gets off?

- That's the rule.
- That's the rule...

...for someone who understands
the rules, which Bank don't.

He already broke them.
So he don't get the chance.

For Reuben...

...I think we give him a chance.

I need answers before I ask questions.
You get that?

All right, do it.

So some guys I take seriously...

...told me you're a serious guy.
- Good.

What I want,
what's most important to me...

...is that Reuben gets his share
of the hotel restored.

- I'm here to give you a chance to do that.
- Oh, you're gonna give me a chance?


It's a Billy Martin? I pass.

Last time I looked...
And I look every morning.

- It was my name listed as owner...

...on more valuable property in this state
than anyone else in history.

- Which means you got a lot more to lose.
- Well, I don't lose.

People who bet on me to lose lose,
and they lose big.

You come at me,
you better know I move quick...

...and when I do,
I slice like a goddamn hammer.

So you're not gonna
make Reuben whole?

If Reuben was too weak or too stupid
to see what was coming down...

...then you know what?
He doesn't belong here.

He's made the right choice:
Roll over and die. Let him be.

How long do I have to wait
for a conduit?

I don't want the labor pains.
I just want the baby.

Six months later...

Well, thanks for coming.

Thanks for the hundred grand.

If this takes longer than a day, though,
we're gonna have to renegotiate.

That's fair.

I'd like some Sencha or Genmaicha.

Green tea. Yes, sir.

And don't burn it. Pour it just
before boiling point, not after.

Green tea. Sì, signore.

Just us three?

- For now, we figured...
- Figured we'd talk to you first.

- Good Lord. How stuck are you?
- Stuck.

- Stalled, really.
- Stuck.

Run it for me.

Don't leave anything out.
Give me the big picture.

- You wanna...?
- It's all yours.

- Where should we start?
- With the hotel.

Bank's swinging for the fences
on this one.

Forget weekenders and conventioneers.
He's built this place for whales.

It's a shoo-in for the Five Diamond Award.
The marble was handpicked in Italy.

The chefs stolen from the highest-rated
restaurants in the Michelin guide book.

In the villas, for his big players,
the silverware is actually gold.

Bank's greatest strength
is also his weakness: Ego.

He's been spending his days checking and
rechecking every inch of the property...

... getting ready for the grand opening.

It's a compulsion.

Bank's right-hand man is a woman:
Abigail Sponder.

We're gonna have to let you go.
Turn in your uniform.

I only gained 4 pounds. You can't.

Your body mass index is not
what it's supposed to be.

- But Ms. Sponder...
- Oh, no, baby doll.

It's your butt that's the problem.

You can't fire no waitress
based on appearance.

- That's just unconstitutional.
- If they were waitresses.

They're actually hired
as "models who serve"...

...so Bank can monitor
their physical appearance.

It's a cruel, cruel practice.

Between Bank and Sponder,
the place is covered.

- When's opening night?
- July third.

Got fireworks at the stroke of midnight.
The whole shebang.

We're going in now? It's already open.

It's a soft opening, to test the place
before the grand opening.

It's kind of like an out-of-town preview,
only it's in town.

Soft opening, grand opening.
When they opened the Flamingo...

...one day it was closed, the next day
it was open. End of story.

- I know, I was there.
- Well, it's different now.

- So when is opening night?
- July third.

Now, the top casinos can clear
$3 million a day just on the floor.

Bank, with his high-level players
and no limits, is projecting 5.

But in exchange for the loans, he had to
give up 6 of the 9 seats on the board.

He doesn't control his company,
and a couple of the guys aren't friendlies.

So he has to clear 500 million
in the first quarter...

...or he gets dumped
out of his own hotel.

And, of course, Bank wants another
Five Diamond Award. Fifth in a row.

Every hotel I have ever owned has won
a Royal Review Five Diamond Award.

The Sagarro Inn, five diamonds.

The Peloponnesian, Monte Carlo,
five diamonds.

The Grand Sapphire, Singapore,
cinco diamantes!

The Otemanu Crest, Tahiti...

I've never not won one.

- So how are you gonna get the diamonds?
- We're not.

We thought about it,
then we decided it was...


But he's not gonna be winning any more.
Tell him about Debbie.

Yeah, tell me about Debbie.

Debbie is concierge at The Bank.
She's very ambitious...

... in a good way, for us.

As soon as I said the words
"general manager" and "Macao"...

... she was in.
I put a cherry on top to make sure.

We found out who'd
be reviewing the hotel.

We're gonna get to him
before Bank can.

I feel bad. It's like torture.

This is war, kid.
There's gonna be collateral damage.

And he gets the Susan B. Anthony
at the airport.

- He doesn't know that.
- So what?

He has to know why he won to enjoy it?

- Who says?
- So you'd go through that for 10 million?

No. I'd do it for 11 mil.

Now, we've found out Bank is tapped
into the federal fingerprint database.

Highly illegal.

We came up with a way to piggyback
his system between firewall checks.

- Very interesting stuff out there.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. What else?

We're gonna get his whales.

- How?
- He talked to Denny Shields.

Denny Shields? After he bragged
about you guys to Toulour...

...and started that whole slog?
- We need him.

I should've kept my mouth shut.

And then I saw that guy walking around.
I didn't know who he was.

He was just some guy to me.
And I guess I pissed him off.

Denny, there's no way you could've
known who he was, so just forget it.

It's okay. Let it go.

Well, the other stuff I got taken care of
is all straight. I got 18 whales.

I spoke to their handlers, I spoke to their
managers, I spoke to their assistants.

Every one of them's gonna leave.
We're gonna do it in two tiers.

- I'm leaving first. They're gonna follow.
- Great.

Okay. But you gotta make sure they win,
because these guys usually lose.

- And when they lose, they get comped.
- They're gonna win big.

- How big?
- Five hundred.

- Million? Just the group of you?
- No.

- No, it's a reverse big store.
- Right.

- Doesn't matter if we win.
- As long as the casino loses, yes.

That could actually work.
So you need to rig...

Craps, blackjack, roulette, slots.

Now this polymer reacts
to ultrasonic pulses.

But it's not metallic, so the compasses
on the table won't detect it.

And it don't affect the weight
when they mike the dice. Now, this...

Not really a lighter?

Dice are controlled from the manufacturer
all the way to the floor.

Which is why we went all the way
to the manufacturer.

You think they could kick on
the air conditioning?

It's dangerous.

Put your mask back on.

Danger is my middle name.

So that's not your problem.
So you're jammed on blackjack?

We've embedded Livingston
in the Shuffle company.

The tack will stimulate your EKG
much in the same way a lie would.

But you have to step on it during
the control questions...

...name, birthdate, so on...

...so those levels will match
the stress levels of your false answers.

Got it. How much is this gonna hurt?

If you're doing it right,
should be excruciating.

- Is your birthdate February 11 th, 1965?
- Yes.

- Are you wearing a white shirt?
- Yes.

Have you ever been involved
in the commission of a crime?


Have you ever defrauded or attempted
to defraud the gaming industry?


- Alex?
- Solid.

I love technology.

To look at you, I'd swear
you were being evasive...

...but the machine says you're clean.

I'm just a little nervous.
I really want this job.

Well, you can relax now.
Welcome to Shuffle Royale.

The Shuffle Royale.

Well, I doubt I've heard
the last of that one.

So if blackjack is not your problem,
it must be slots.

Progressives run off
computer chips now.

You're gonna have to
program in a trap door.

I can probably find you
someone to do that.

Thanks, Roman.

We got somebody on the inside.
A great kid named Eugene.

He's got a little too much downtime.

He's run up a nice online gaming tab.

He won't be able to keep it
a secret much longer.

Now I have no... Yeah, it's crazy.

- How bad is it?
- It's bad. I owe $30,000.

- So it may as well be a hundred.
- All right.

Let's call it a hundred.

Thanks, Danny.

Eugene, my pleasure. Now tell me how
you're gonna program that trap door.

So if that's not the problem,
it must be roulette.

Cutting edge in that game
is infrared scanner in the shoe...

... wired to a microcomputer
somewhere on your person...

... which figures the probability of where
the wheels will land to three digits.

Yeah, we tried that.

The way he was dressed didn't help.

Not very subtle, this guy.

- So you're stuck on roulette.
- No.

We're going lo-fi. We figured we'd
get some loaded balls in there.

You're kidding.
How are you gonna deliver?

Two stages.
First, we position a man of our own.

There's a gaming expo
the day of the grand opening...

...which Bank is committed to attend,
to show what a regular guy he is.

Frank's suiting up as the gamer.

The men who make the decisions
are very, very hard to impress.

That's why I'm asking each
and every one of you to help me sell it...

...by being the most classy,
genteel ladies.

The image that we're looking for
is a tasteful elegance.

- What exactly do you want us to do?
- Raise those skirts up about three inches.

Second part: We tie Frank to one
of theirs, a pit boss with sticky fingers.

How much for these?

Does Willy Bank know you're stealing
his gold flatware, Neil?

How do you know my name?

Oh, we know a lot of names.

Know your wife, Mary,
your kids, Leanne and Dolly.

We know you're the pit boss
at the casino.

Come on, you don't wanna... Please!

We don't wanna hurt you.
We wanna help you.

We want to double your salary
all in one night.

What do you need me to do?

Right now, nothing.
Go home, do your job...

...and at the appropriate moment,
somebody will present themself to you.

- Enough said?
- Enough said.

Who is the shill at the expo
to rope Bank?

- We're still looking.
- We'll find someone.

Make sure it's someone
he really despises.

Back to macro.
What is your exit strategy?

The players won't be in on the scam,
so they'll all think it's their lucky night.

But you'll never get them out the door
with all their winnings.

They'll dump it all back.
That's Vegas, and that's your problem.

Well, the exit strategy is a problem,
it's not the problem.

The problem is security.
We're drawing a blank.

And it's a little spooky.

The specs aren't on the gray market,
the black market or any other market.

All I hear is there's never been
a system like this.

I found out where they designed it,
but I can't get in the building.

I've blown all my buy money,
my bribe money...

...four of my best IDs,
and I am nowhere.

Not only am I nowhere,
I'm pretty sure I'm being followed.

- Do you have anything?
- I think I have a name.

I don't even know if it's right.
They're calling it...

The Greco. The Greco Player Tracker.

They're putting it in Vegas.

- I'll give you back the hundred grand.
- Why?

Danny, I like you.

And you, Rusty. I mean, you got style.

You got brio. You got loyalty.

You two are the Morecambe and Wise
of the thievery world...

...but even they went off the boil.

You're analog players in a digital world.

You're done.

Believe me, I would love to go
up against Greco, and crush him...

...but it can't be beat.

It can't be hacked, and it can't be beat.

- Not even by you?
- With 18 months...

...nothing else on my plate,
no other jobs, women or distractions...


You know everything about this thing.

Everything except
where it was being deployed.

The inventor
is an old schoolmate of mine.

His name is Greco Montgomery.

Pompous ass named it after himself.

Greco? Roman?

You've obviously never served time
in a British boarding school.

So, what's so tough about this thing?

It's an artificial-intelligence
security system.

- They must be field testing.
- You mean it has a brain?

A hell of a brain.

It doesn't only think, it reasons.

It reads every permutation in every wager
in every seat in the entire casino...

...hand by hand.

It's wired into floor security cameras that
measure pupil dilation and determine...

...if a win is legitimate or expected.

It gathers biofeedback,
players' heart rates, body temperatures.

It measures
on a second-by-second basis...

...whether the standard variations
of gaming algorithm are holding...

... or are being manipulated.
The data is analyzed in real time...

...in a field of exabytes.


- You know what a terabyte is?
- Yeah, it's a...

- An exabyte is a million terabytes.
- Right.

The Greco is housed
in an impregnable room.


...and it locks down
if it even senses it is under attack.

If it locks down, they wouldn't even
be able to get out of the room.

Couldn't we just shut it off?
You know, cut the wires?

That could work.

- Better, kick the plug out at the socket.
- Seriously.

Short of walking into that room with
a bloody magnetron around your neck...

You know what a magnetron is?

Something that screws up the Greco?

Short of that...

I'm kind of shocked this is where
we are, because this is a problem.

That's what I said.

- If we could somehow shut it off...
- There's no "if."

It cannot be shut off.

You'd need a real natural disaster,
an actual act of God.

- But if we could beat it...
- You can't.

- But if we did...
- You can't.

- You could.
- Don't flatter.

If we could, how long
would it take to reboot?

Because it's so sophisticated,
three and a half minutes.

- Might be enough.
- Pick your natural disaster.

Get me a laptop.

The drill accesses through a sewer main
off Paris Drive.

It grinds along into the northwest
corner of the hotel, here.

Probably about six rpm,
so you won't wake all the neighbors.

When it reaches the resonant frequency,
the building acts like a tuning fork.

To people inside,
it will feel like an earthquake.

That should knock out the Greco.
And that's your exit strategy.

- Hey, Bash!
- I'm up here!


- Here you go. Okay.
- Great.

Hey, where are the mags?

- Linus...
- Look, I can't buy those things.

I need them! I can't leave.
Why are you such a...?

I'm sorry! Ask somebody else.
Ask Livingston.

You're such a wowser.


Read this to Reuben.

I've done research.
Positive messages get through.

I can't say this.

No, I'm saying it. You're just the vessel.

Come on, Basher.
Why don't you take a break?

I'll watch all the equipment,
and you go read it to him.

Shit! You know,
when they were digging the tunnel...

...they had teams of guys
monitoring this.

Yeah? How many?


That's a 5.6.

If you don't think a 5.6 is possible,
or even likely...

...then quite frankly, you don't know
much about the Billups-Mancini Report...

...specifically the section
on the Mojave Block.

I know what you're hoping: That it'll just
be a blind thrust fault. It'll just...

See that? That's Rusty. See Rusty?

He's doing an Irwin Allen. See that?

He's not deaf, Linus.

- Bottom-line me here.
- Close your hotel, permanently.

- What? We haven't even opened yet.
- What are all those people downstairs?

- A soft open.
- It's like an out-of-town preview.

You think you can just come in here,
tell me to close my hotel?

I'm not gonna close my hotel.

If you'll let me come in with my team for
a few days, I can prove what I'm saying.

There is no way we are exposing
our exclusive clientele to a bunch of...

Scientists? We wouldn't want that,
would we?

Let's just hope for the best, shall we?
That should be enough.

Take this.
It's a standard torsion seismograph.

If there is a foreshock, it will register,
and you just might have time to evacuate.

I don't want this thing on my desk.

Let me tell you what you don't want: Your
hotel on the cover of TIME magazine...

...in a twisted heap of steel and glass,
you and your customers are underneath it.

Headline reads, "Who's To Blame?"

- That's what you don't want.
- Okay.

Put an evacuation plan on paper.

Will do, sir. Consider it done.

I do thank you for your time.

If you wanna put yourself to good use,
why don't you hit the tables?

Oh, I don't gamble, sir. Neither should
you, not with people's lives.

I'll screen the meetings more carefully
next time. Sorry, Mr. Bank.

And now we have a camera
in Bank's office.

I'll see you, Reuben.

A letter from Basher.

"Dear Reuben.

As the band said,
'Two hearts beat as one.'

When men have been in battle together,
they are bonded...

...like the flower and the soil and the sun.
And like the moon catches the light..."

Reuben, I'm gonna go ahead on
and leave this...


I'll see you, pal.

So she says, "What'd I do?"

And I said, "What do I look like,
a pancake eater?"

- So you just left it there on the floor?
- Right on the floor.

- For how long?
- Next morning.



Thanks, Debbie. Pack your swimsuit.

All right.

I don't wanna see any slack faces
in the front of the house.

- Only happy faces. No slack faces.
- Right.

- Go! Go, go!
- Right.

I'm sorry.

- Mr. Shields!
- Thanks.

Where are you going? We got you
booked through grand opening.

A friend of mine, a very serious man...

...told me very seriously that it would
be a good idea if I left the hotel.

I'm taking his suggestion, Willy.

He can't be too serious if he knew
what I got in store for you.

Willy, I'm out of here.

- Oh, come on.
- See you, Willy.

- I really hate to see you go, man.
- Let's go.

Bank here.


- Where?
- The gentleman in the trilby, sir.

The what?

The Dr. Dolittle hat.

Well, why didn't you just say that?



Yes, sir.

- Excuse me, Mr...?
- Chubb, Kensington Chubb.

Mr. Chubb, would you like to follow me?
I might be able to move things along.

How very nice of you. No, no, no.

Her Highness is a very delicate animal.

It upsets her so if anyone
but Papa carries her about.

- All's well, dear.
- Why don't you just follow me?

You're very considerate. I do
appreciate what you're doing for me.

Oh, sorry.

- Why does he get to go...?
- He's a VIP.

So, what's that make me? A VUP?
A very unimportant person?

I have a reservation.

Why don't you go on break, Jim?
I'll handle this guest.

Hello, sir. Sorry for the wait.
Welcome to The Bank.

Hello. Kensington Chubb here.

- Saul, it's me. He's in his room. Blast him.
- Got it.

Gloves and mask.
Don't take any chances.

Got it.

Hello. Front desk.

Yes, I'm in room 1706, and there's
some sort of terrible smell in here.

It smells like... Well, I need to move.

Certainly, sir.
I'll see if we have anything available.

I'm sorry, sir. We are booked
through the grand opening gala.

I'll let you know
if anything opens up.

- Enjoy your stay at The Bank. Goodbye.
- But I...

Let the VIP concierge know
that I'm ready to see all available rooms.

- Right away, Mr. Chubb.
- Thank you.

Her Highness is so very sensitive
to smells.

If you keep complaining...

...they will fire us all
just for listening.

I'm just saying
the conditions are brutal.

You can't disagree.

The money... short.

The hours... way too long.

That's Mexico, bro.

Have all of you
forgotten Zapata?

When the poor
had their land stolen...

...they figured it was
lost for good.

But Zapata said
to them...

It is better to die
on your feet...

...than to live
on your knees.

And they fought.

And they fought.

Hello. I'd like a table for one.
I hear your risotto is tremendous.

It is tremendous.
The name on the reservation?

I'm a walk-in.

I'm sorry, sir. I can't accommodate you.

Those are reserved. May I recommend
one of our other restaurants?

Ling Su.
Cantonese-inspired Szechuan cuisine.


Okay, it is not a prop for prop's sake.

No, the Brody can work.

Just because you have
the greatest cover known to man...

...you don't even have to think about
these things anymore? Congratulations.

No, maybe you're getting soft.

No, I'm not gonna put Danny on.

Or Rusty.

Just... Goodbye, Dad.

Okay. I rerouted all the impulses
going to the main randomizer.

In blackjack, the best score
you can get is 21.

It's called blackjack.
So the result should be...

...20s and blackjacks to all the players,
with a dealer "bust."

Your cards. That's mine.

Okay, do over. Do over.

Okay, I'll keep working.

- Good.
- Good.

I'll have the dumplings
and the shiitake-mushroom tempura.

- And a sparkling water.
- Okay.

I'm gonna finish this.




Room cleanliness."

At this point, there's nothing
I can do to help him.

You said that he'd be, whatchamacallit,
ambulatory by now.

- Are you keeping his spirits buoyed?
- We're working on it.

Thanks, Stan.

No, no. That's way too much.
It's not like I removed a bullet.

This time.

- Hey, Linus. How's it going?
- Dr. Stan. Great.

- We're dead.
- What?

- The factory in Mexico is offline.
- Offline?

- What does that mean exactly?
- I couldn't get details. It just shut down.

- You don't think that he...?
- Yeah, I do.

So he says that they want their bread
and they want their roses too.

You gotta get down there
and straighten this out.

- But he doesn't listen to me.
- You're going.

If we don't get this factory back online,
we're gonna have to dock this showboat.

What he means is
the whole operation hinges...

Dude, I got the showboat metaphor.
Thank you, Linus.

- All right, I gotta get back.
- What?

What do you mean, what?
A little something for the effort, maybe.

We pool tips! The other guys
are gonna think I'm kiting.

All right, okay, fine. Come on.

- You want it to come out of my pocket?
- I ain't got money till I get my check.

- Yeah?
- What is this?

Take it easy. What's the problem?

The tri-cone optimizers that feed
into the nipple-sleeve receivers...

...perforated their lubricating bladders and
began punching against the side walls.

Picture a knee, but without any cartilage.
Bone on bone.

There's a shearing effect when alloys
of different density abrade.

- The softer of the two...
- Magnetizes, reversing polarization.

Where's that put us?


Good news is, there's another B-600,
the one that dug the Chunnel.

I thought we had the one
that dug the Chunnel.

- We did.
- This one dug from the French side.

Bad news is, we're gonna
have to buy this one, and it's expensive.

How much do we have left?

If I tap the whole contingency,
just over 10 million.

- How close does that get us?
- No.

- How much is it?
- Thirty...

- Thirty?


- There's no way to do it without the drill?
- The drill's the exit strategy.

Well, is there a way
for us to raise money?

I've got everything
I have in this already.

- So do I.
- Me too.

We all do.

If any one of us was lying up in that bed,
Reuben wouldn't rest till he made it right.

I gotta go up there and tell him we failed,
and there's nothing we can do about it?

- So we're stopping?
- I'm not saying that.

So, what, then?

Mr. Reuben is talking.
He ask for Mr. Danny.

- Rusty.
- I don't wanna go. No.

I hear cars pulling in.

I hear whispering conversations.
Linus crying.

Why don't you tell me
what everyone else seems to know?

- Well, we came in here to...
- The thing is...

Wait, wait.

Hi, Reuben.
Good to see you smiling again.

Can I talk to you guys for a second?

That's your idea?

We've shaken all the trees, we've looked
under every rock, we've searched every...

We've talked to everybody
we can trust.

It's not a great idea, but it is an idea.

I think as long as we have one idea,
we shouldn't give up.

I was really hoping
to avoid that this time.

Number one:

If any of you try to screw me,
you'll be dead.

I'm gonna be looking in
on the operation to make sure.

Number two: If I lend you this money,
I'm your senior partner.

Last money in, first money out.
And you will double my investment.


- Was that a yes?
- Double.

That monstrosity that Bank calls a hotel
casts a shadow over my pool.

Break him.

Break him in half. The man has no taste.
Yet, every time he opens a hotel...

...he wins a Royal Review Board
Five Diamond Award.

Every time he wins a Five Diamond
Award, he celebrates by...

We know. By buying one for his wife.

- You mean five.
- One is five.

Number three:

I want you to steal the diamonds.

- Can't be done.
- We don't have the manpower.

- Or the time.
- Or a way in.

If we get caught, we go away for life.
We won't risk that for you.

They're not for me. I just want him
to lose what matters most to him.

Do what you want with them.

But either you steal the diamonds...

...or you find somebody else
to finance your drill.

(The one that dug from the French side.)

What's the deal with these diamonds?

They're Tiffany, they're 30 carats each,
matching the awards plaques.

On today's legitimate market,
they'd be worth $250 million.

Bank's already purchased the next one
in anticipation of winning the award.

The rest are kept in a secure glass
viewing booth at the top of the tower.

- Benedict said we can keep them?
- That's what he said.

Then why weren't these diamonds
on the agenda to begin with?

Because it can't be done.

This is why revenge jobs
don't work, Daniel.

You put yourself in a position, you know
you should walk away, but you can't.

- This is how guys die or go to jail.
- All right.

Anybody wanna walk away?

- Saul?
- I didn't say I was walking away.

Let's gut the son of a bitch.

Okay. Now, Bank fired Gehry,
Gwathmey, Meier, four others...

...just so he could say
he designed the hotel himself.

What this means to us:
There's no set of unified plans.


According to March '05 plans, there's
interior shafts with potential access...

...to the diamond viewing room here,
here and here.

But the May '05 plans
only show shafts here and here.

September '05 shows no shafts.

December 'are the same as March '05.

- How many sets of plans are there?
- That's 10.

Since we can't trust
the accuracy of these drawings...

...based on my walking around, these are
the shafts we have to clap an eyeball on.

Now, there's no way of knowing
the thickness of the floor.

Anything thicker than 5 inches,
we got a problem.

This here is the elevator shaft...

...which can be accessed through
a super-high-roller villa. Got it?

All right. So who's gonna be
our super-high roller?

I'm so sorry
to have been a little tardy, Mr...?

Pepperidge, Lenny Pepperidge.
I'm Mr. Weng's communicator.

He'd like you to know
that he was waiting for 7 minutes.

We received your $ 10 million cash
deposit. I'd like you to know that we...

Mr. Weng won't take a line.
He's a man of extraordinary discipline.

He's willing to risk 10 million,
not a dollar more.

- Did you say Mr. Weng was in real estate?
- That's right.

I only ask because his name doesn't
come up on our standard file database.

And Mr. Weng and I have worked
very hard to keep it that way.

Exactly what kind of real estate did
you say that Mr. Weng was involved in?

- Look, he owns all the air south of Beijing.
- The air?

Put it to you this way:

Try building something larger than
three stories in the Tianjin province...

...see if his name comes up
in your database then.

How quickly can you transfer his money
to the cage at the Bellagio?

I don't think that's necessary at all,
Mr. Pepperidge.

We have reserved our largest villa
for Mr. Weng.

Carson City, NV

Extension 765.

Hello, Robert. This is Abigail Sponder.

Your bureau chief introduced us not too
long ago at the Gaming Fraud Seminar.

I remember you.
What can I do for you, Ms. Sponder?

We're about to open the new property...

...and there are a couple of characters
here I'm not too sure about.

Give me their names,
and I'll check them out.

Up you go.

- What do you mean?
- You gotta go.

Too fast?

You did the bullet-train stunt
with all Asia watching.

The elevators aren't faster than that.

- That was CGI?
- Wait, so those weren't your legs?

- Wow.
- Jesus.

Okay, then. We're down again.

Well, what about Reuben?

- There's hospice.
- Assisted living.

We could pay somebody to read to him.

Maybe he'll see his next birthday.

- January? I don't think so.
- Shit.

Shit, shit, shit.


And then what happened?

- She said she liked surprises.
- That's not what she meant.

You think?

So she put down the remote.

- And I put the towel back on.
- Well, those are the waters.

- Relationships can be...
- Sure.

- But they're also...
- That's right.

I've gone through so many blueprints,
I can taste the ink through my fingers.

The only other access
is through the air conditioning duct.

- We gotta move that guard.
- We don't have anything on him.

- Then let's find something.
- I can get to the helipad from there too.

Let's find something.

I remember when
this used to be the Dunes.

Reuben taught me to shoot craps here
when I was a kid.

I'd play hard ways and double sixes.
He straightened me out.

I was 22.

First time I met Reuben...

...he looked me off getting cheated
at an all-dealers game at the El Rancho.

Then he bought me breakfast.

The Sands was there, Desert Inn.

- They built them a lot smaller back then.
- They seemed pretty big.

Town's changed.

If I read one more puff piece
about Vegas legend Terry Benedict...

... I'm gonna have to buy a magazine
of my own.

And I haven't forgotten
about that phone.

The gold model?
The one that retails for 10,000?

That's the one.
That top-of-the-line Samsung.

Okay, that would be ungettable.

No, no. You call Teddy Sanders
in Promotions.

I did that.
He promised you the very first one...

... as soon as it comes off
the line in September.

Well, that's July for me.
You just make it happen.

What'd he say about Samsung?

He said he used to bowl
with the owner of Samsung.

Well, call Danny.

Oh, and tell Danny I know the perfect guy
we can use for the roper at the Expo.

I thought we were addressing this.

- We were. We are. Randall is.
- I must've put too much...

Don't blame yourself.
He should've fired you a week ago.


Are you having a nice day?

And you, sir?
How's your Bank experience?

- Well, it's...
- Can I be of personal assistance to you?

This is quite unorthodox.

I have never found myself
talking directly to a hotel owner.

I understand. You're just a customer.

And I'm just an engaged innkeeper.

- Spot on.
- Spot on.

Well, so far, in my book...

...this establishment is aces.

Aces? That's good.
The ace of diamonds...

...I hope.

I see what you're...
Diamonds, indeed. Yes!

- Your apartment with everything
that we like.

A lovely new living room
from Walter E. Smithe.

- Hey.
- Hey.

The guard by the elevator shaft has a
little Hitler for a son. A real Ritalin sniffer.

- You okay?
- Yeah, no, I just bit into a pepper, and...


Is that...?

Are you...?

Are you watching Oprah?

With a bottle of wine?

- Did you TiVo this?
- I was reading the paper.

With the sound at full volume?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Hold on, hold on.

And not one, not two, not three,
but 12 new beds.

It's not just about the kids.
I mean, I'm happy for the kids.

I think we've come up
with the answer to your prayers.

This is what I think we're gonna do.
We are buying you a house!

How's it going in Mexico?

Well, Turk's there.

Are they really gonna build her
a new home?

Yeah, for the whole family.

Then what did you say?

- What could I say?
- Nothing.

That's what I said.


- You guys been talking to my father?
- Why would we do that?

That's not a no.

He just wanted to know how
the nose was working.

Oh, I knew it, man.
He just can't leave it alone.

- What'd you say?
- Oh, I told him the nose plays.

- The nose does play.
- It plays.

- It's great.
- It's huge.

Turk? Hey, are you gonna
get the factory open?

Hell, yes!
We just gotta break management!

They can't keep treating us like this!

Well, I gotta go!

- Ortega here. Oh, no.
- Mr. Ortega, this is Vice Principal Meckler.

I'm afraid so. We've had another incident
with Manny and Ms. Kelso.

It was the leg this time.

We need somebody to come down
and pick him up.

- My wife can't...?
- We're not able to get a hold of her.

We've left messages.

Yo, yo, yo! Buddy, buddy! Do me
a favor. Cover my post for half an hour.

I was just about to go on break.

Come on, man. Help me out.
My kid just bit the lunch lady again.

- Yeah, all right.
- All right, man, I owe you one.

Yeah, you do.

All right.

According to this...

...the room where
the diamonds are held...

...is directly above here.

A quarter billion dollars' worth
of diamonds...

... and 18 inches of poured concrete
in the way.

Man, we can't drill through that.

It's just one thing too many.

We're talking about
a secure room, Terry.

This isn't a glass box
these diamonds are housed in.

This is 2-inch-thick,
concussion-proof glass.

Wired with pressure-sensitive
7-digit coded alarms.

Kill the power to the hotel.
It's worked for you before.

No, see, the case and the alarm
both have independent power supply.

And besides, you don't run the same
gag twice. You do the next gag.

How big a deal is it
if we don't get the diamonds?

You have all your affairs in order?

All right. So, what we have to do is...

...get inside that glass case
and switch in the replicas.

How are we supposed to get in the room?
Bank is the only one with access.

- Sponder has too.
- Sponder has access?

Then we're in.

Sponder's a...

Well, I believe the term is "cougar."

It's not my term.
I read about it in Maxim magazine.

Okay. Let's get Rusty in position...

No, not Rusty. Me.
I'm already in there.

I put this whole thing in motion
before I even realized it.

I'm so deep into Pepperidge,
I don't even think. I just react. I am him.

You know what? Okay, great. Great.

Would you just tell them?

Oh, now you don't understand English?

She was not trying not to laugh.
You know what?

- I can do it.
- He says he can do it.

All right, Linus, go get her.
Give him the accelerator.

- Natural? Chemical?
- I don't need an accelerator.

- Make it powerful.
- Thanks a lot.

- I'll fly in a Gilroy.
- Get two.

- You don't need it.
- Just one Gilroy. Last time you did two...

News from Mexico.
From a journalista I used to...

She's an ally of the workers.
What she tells me...

...is that the strike hinges
on working conditions...

...and the fact that labor feels
they're underpaid by 50 percent.

I'm sure you'll agree, Terry,
it's always about the money.

How much are we talking about?

- Thirty-six thousand.
- How many workers?

- Two hundred, give or take.
- All right, that's...

Just over 7 million dollars.

No, no. Not 36 K per person. 36 total.

Turk and Virgil got them holding out
for $3.50 a week?

- It is a 5-percent increase.
- We'll write them a check.

We'll post-date it.

Remember, tell my
brother "hang tough."

This is Roman Nagel.

If your consciousness
absolutely has to intrude upon mine...

... leave me a message.

Hey, Roman? It's Livingston.

I heard you were out here, taking
some meetings, and I was wondering...

...if you could help me out...

...with a technical problem I've been
having with one of my assignments.

And I was hoping that we could,
you know, keep it on the down low...

...from Danny and the other guys,
that I'm coming to you for help.

So call me when you get this. Okay?



Was Sponder with him?

- "A whole new segment."
- Which car?

- Which Rolls?
- "Exclusive rights."

What's the ETA?

- "In Tunica, Mississippi."
- Okay.

He's on his way.

- Think he's gonna fall for this?
- You did.

You ready?

I was born ready.

Who advanced this?

Did I not say he was
to have this room to himself?

And what part of that
did you not understand?

How are you?
I caught your show. That kid is great.

Thank you for that. Congratulations
on the enormity of your success.

- Back at you.
- Love and respect. Peace.

Good seeing you, Bernie.

Allow me to introduce to you
the greatest advance in gaming...

...since pari-mutuel wagering.
Get beyond boring cards and tired dice.

It's electrifying! It's exciting!
It's 'Nuff Said!

Yes, sir.

Oh, my God. Mr. Bank. It's an honor, sir.

May I please give you a demonstration
of casino dominoes?

House edge 14 percent.

- Is this documented?
- Of course.

The action makes the player feel
like they have a fighting chance...

...if you understand my meaning.
Check it out, ladies and gentlemen.

Mr. Bank is gonna give
a young and upcoming gamer a chance.

Give him a warm applause.
Come on now!

- All right. Make it quick.
- Thank you, sir.

Mr. Bank. First round of betting.
Next, dominoes!

Second round of betting.
Upcoming, community dominoes.

Mr. Bank, if a player wins on
a multiple of five on the first spin...

...he or she is a winner.

Payout, 5-to-1. But guess what.

They're already laying 11 -to-1.

So when they win, Mr. Bank, we win.

'Nuff Said.

That is good.

I tell you what. Why don't you
send me some of your literature...

...and we'll see what we can do.

Literature, literature. Mr. Bank, come on.

You don't need to read no literature.
All you need to do is feel it!

Well, I feel it. It's just that I don't know
if it's bankable. All right?


I'd like to place this game
in one of my casinos.

Now, that's what I'm talking about.
That's progressive thinking.

I embrace the fact that 'Nuff Said might
grow a whole new segment in my hotels.


And I'd like to lock this up right now.
Exclusive rights.

I wanna place this beautiful domino table
at our Tunica location.

Mississippi? That's where
games go to die, isn't it?

Stay out of this, Bank.
You already passed.

Really? Then do for him
what I'm prepared to.

Prime placement, center room, Vegas,

Mr. Bank has three minutes,
you've got one. Go!

Well, there'll be a series of brocades.

Then the dahlia shells,
weeping willows, tiger tails...

- Whoa, whoa. When's the jump?
- The motorcycle guy?

Mr. Roads will jump his motorcycle
through the fireworks and over the Bank...

You guys gotta get together on this.
Fireworks and stunts.

You gotta be on the same page.

All eyes of Vegas are gonna be on me.
It's gotta be perfect.

All right. So take it from the top.

- Yes, sir. Around about 12:00...
- No, not around about. At 12.

The stroke of midnight.
Go off the Navy master clock.

Oh, don't make a maniac out of me.

- Where the hell are they going?
- I don't really know what's happening.

We've just lost two dozen of our
biggest players without an explanation.

Well, get an explanation!

Ms. Sponder, this just came in.
Rush express. Hand-delivered.

Oh, thank you. Thank you! Thanks.

My pleasure.

Guys. Let's go.

My dear Mr. B., this is a thank you
for all that you've given me.

The opportunity, the kindness,
the warmth, the ch...

The one you couldn't get, huh?

The one you couldn't get.


- How did Ocean get all my big players?
- Would you like me to have him removed?

They'll all go with him.

- Hey.
- How are the matches?

Why don't you come see for yourself?

All right.

Why don't you give me one reason
not to bounce your ass out of my place?

You know the reasons. You already
decided before you walked over here.

They were all booked here.
You took them.

What did you do, bribe them?
Buy them? Trick them?


You brought them here
to rub it in my face.

You know, you're half-smart, Ocean.

Why don't you get real smart?
Let them play here...

...and I'll give you 10 percent
of their losses.

- You give it to Reuben if it'll make you...
- I'm not that easy. You almost killed him.

Twenty percent
whenever they gamble here.


So it's done?

- How do I know you won't...?
- We cash out every night, settle in cash.

Otherwise, take them back again.

- They'll need villas.
- Villas?


Let's go, boys.

There we go. All right.
Let's hit the tables.

But I say, why not feel it?
Why not feel the rush?

Come on. Take a trip.

Shake my hand. Who knows?

Maybe you have what it takes
to break The Bank.

- Long past checkout time, sir.
- What? I'm in no condition to check out.

You've overstayed your reservation.
We need the room.

Innkeeper laws make it illegal
to evict a guest...

Except in cases of public health
and safety...

...when the occupant evidences a
flagrant disregard for personal hygiene.

I haven't disregarded my hygiene.

- You have.
- Sir, what we're trying to say is...

...you've gone nose deaf.
- What?

You're oblivious to your effect
on other guests.

- I really don't see what effect...
- Fifteen minutes!

Fifteen minutes.
Hey, 15 minutes.

Pack your things or we will
pack them for you. Get the picture?

- What?
- Get the picture?

- Pack your things.
- Don't make us come back.

- Pack your things!
- Hey, okay.


The Gilroy

- Well, hello there.
- There are no tomorrows, Mr. Pepperidge.

Call me Lenny.

I need this room.

I gave Mr. Chang a...

Mr. Weng a chance.

I need the Asian villas,
all the Asian villas.

Well, perhaps you'd like to tell...

...Mr. Weng yourself.

In fact, I would. I would.

...you know, the last time we spoke,
he was quite rude to me.

Well, in that case,
you'll find him somewhere...

...between the cashier's cage
and the high-stakes Pai Gow room.

He was about to eat,
when the mood to play suddenly hit him.

It just hit him, just like that?

I might've said something
to encourage him.

Why would you do that?

When you work for a powerful man...

...sometimes the collar
can get a little tight.

Excuse me.

- Is it on?
- Yeah.

- Thanks, homes.
- You're welcome.

Nestor says hang tough.

Mr. Bank, I just wanna thank you
for throwing me out of your hotel.

- And who are you?
- Nobody.

All right, fellas.

You're such an idiot.


He used to gamble too.
I'm not kidding you. Right here.

We're gonna need you standing by
in a support capacity.

Bad news just walked in.

All right, the Bureau's in the house.

If they move towards blackjack,
somebody tip Livingston.

Let me welcome you to The Bank
with our finest Kubota sake.

And good to have you back, Denny.
Got some Grey Goose on ice for you.


Livingston Dell?
Federal Bureau of Investigation.

We've got all the exits covered.
You got nowhere to go. Don't be stupid.

Hey, what is going on here?

You've been breached.

We've had this man under surveillance.
He rigs machines.

He rigs them?

We've been in contact with his company.
His background information was bogus.

How many machines
has he gotten his hands on?

I'm not sure.

- Well, let's change them out.
- We won't have enough.

The company's sending over
new machines.

If he rigs machines,
he's working with players.

We know he has confederates.
We just don't know who they are.

If you see anything that looks unusual,
you contact us.

You bet. You think this is over?
This isn't over.

I'm pressing charges.
State and federal charges. Got it?

Now, get him off my floor. Come on.

His fingerprints were all over
that shuffle machine.

I need a name
and all known criminal associates.

Bank's gonna run the prints
off the shuffle machine.

Damn, he's good.

He'll get Livingston's ID
and known associates.

That's us.

What do we have in place for this?

Nothing. They'll scoop us all up and
Bank'll have the best night of his life.

It can't get to Bank.

I know what to do. We'll set up a
cartwheel. Back of the house, 15 minutes.

Who's gonna hack this?

The ideal person's in the back of a car
in handcuffs.

- I can handle it.
- Is anyone else available?

- This is Virgil. I'll give it a shot.
- I can handle it.

- Virgil it is.
- Get it done, Virg.

Switch these out first,
then do the main floor.


All right, time for the starter's gun.
Rusty, what's your 20?

Anybody got eyes on Rusty?
My guys are getting roughed up...

...and they're gonna walk.
This is a two-man play.

Back in range.
Just had to make a last-minute pickup.

Hi, boys.

- There he is.
- Hey, Reuben!

- Reuben, welcome back.
- We missed you, buddy.

Reuben, welcome back.

Let's raise the minimum.
I'd like to play all the seats.

- Really? Pineapple?
- Yeah.

Wait, wait. No, no.
Not here. I could lose my job.

Doesn't the forbidden make it seem
so much more pleasurable?

No, no. No, Abby. I can't be free
with myself in Mr. Weng's villa.

- Is there another room?
- No, we're overbooked by 40 percent.

Somewhere. Somewhere we can go
where we can be alone.

- Please, Abby, take me.
- Okay. Come with me.

Cue the slots.

This is why we have soft openings,
so things like this don't happen.

- Get them fixed.
- Yes, sir.


- What is, me or the diamonds?
- Both.

You know, Lenny, I think you're
the most honest man in this town.

And I don't think we're gonna need
the security cameras for this next part.

Well, not unless you wanna
watch the playback.

I thought we agreed
to turn off our phones.

I know, but that's Bank.

He's the only one
that has that number and...

I could make you give that back
to me now.

You could try.

- Do you have any wine back there?
- I got everything you need back there.

Château d'Yquem?

As long as it's not '73.

Send that to Bank's office.

- Yeah.
- Cue the cartwheel.

You got it.

I was so happy when I saw her
on the magazine.

She's actually one person I really,
you know, want to do awesome.

You know, want her to actually
get somewhere.

Hello. Oh, hey, Saul.

- Came out here originally
for hotel management.

For school.

But, like...

...I don't know.

- Mr. Roads told us to wait inside.
- We'll be interviewing him.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- I'm so sorry, sir. I tried to stop him.
- Not your fault, sweetheart.

You can't stop a man who's jumped
36 Greyhounds end-to-end.

It's all right, Lucille.
I'll speak with him. Yes?

Mr. Bank, do you know
what Chuck Berry said...

...every night before counting,
"One, two, three, four"?

- What did he say?
- "Pay me my money!"

- I'm sure my people will be...
- "In cash."


You've already been wired the money!

Mr. Bank, this is... This is...

This is a Fender Roads moment!

- You in yet?
- I hate that question.

Mr. Bank, Mr. Bank, listen.
With all due respect, sir...

...you got a job tomorrow,
running this place.

- You go to work every day.
- Oh, yawn. I make one phone call...

...I get Shaun White, Travis Pastrana, five
of their buddies here before midnight...

...doing heel-clickers and lazy-boys
off the back of the building.

Yes, if your audience wants to see a
bunch of long-hairs riding rice rockets.

But I'm talking about heavy bikes, sir.
This is heavy bike! Fender Roads is a...

I'm a goddamn American icon!

Don't change it that much.
Keep the structure.

I'm trying to make you taller.
Don't you wanna be taller?

- You're a midget in 34 states.
- An animal in the other 34.

Twenty-four. Twenty-two.

This is a night people will talk about
as long as there's a Las Vegas.

And when they're talking about it, they'll
either be talking about you or they won't.

Now, that's your choice.

Mr. Bank, can I just say one more thing?

- Are you gonna jump?
- Jumping, baby!

Bank here. Yeah, I'm looking.

All right, Rusty's up.

I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You did a very nice job.

I know I did. That's why they
asked me to do it and not you.

Wow, see, that is me offering you
an olive basket...

...and that is you spitting in my face.

Was that your face?

Okay, where's Eugene's trap door?

Under the dragon,
first machine on the left.

Got it. What's the sequence?

Coin, three count. Coin, six count.

Three coins, five count.
Two coins, half count.

Could you make it
any more complicated?

That's just the first sequence.
Then there's two more.


I think...

...I think I may have got all five.

I did. I got all five. I got all five.
Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. I'm the winner!

Oh, my God!

Progressive slots win on opening night?

Genuine shock. Genuine surprise.
Pupil dilation.

Elevated heartbeat.

It's legitimate.

- New dice coming in.
- New dice.

New dice coming in.

New ball coming in.

- What was that?
- You felt it too?

You place your own bet right there.
That's what you do there.

Let me tell you something.

You are a winner.

Greco's still up.

That's it for Plan A.

All right, ladies and gentlemen,
place your bets.

There can only be one winner!

Everything all right? Are we okay?
Did that tremor throw off the system?

No, sir.
It would take more than that...

- Sir?
- Yeah.

I have a pit boss asking for an approval.
He can't reach Ms. Sponder.

- What's the action?
- Ten million. Roulette.

- It's good.
- Book it.

All right, the gentleman's down
to a three-number combination.

Eleven, 12 and 13.

You get reception in here?
That's impossible.

Not with this phone.

Yeah, sorry. Hello? Bank here.

We're getting interference on server one.

- What kind?
- I don't know.

- Hello?
- Server one is going down.

- Oh, no.
- Server two...

Something's in here. That's the
explanation, some kind of magnetron.

Server three's starting to wobble.

A magnetron? Who's got a magnetron?

- Four is down!
- And five. They're all going.

Everyone in this room!
Empty your pockets! Now!

What's "all going"?
What does that mean?

Oh, no. What the hell is this?

Security measures.
When the system senses a threat...

... it shuts down and reboots.

For how long?

Three minutes and twenty seconds.

Snake eyes. All of it.

Oh, that son of a bitch.

We can't take any more bets
until we're back up.

The system's in lockdown.

All calls in and out of this room
are secure, but it's the system...

...that secures them.
Again, sir, it's in lockdown.

- We're rebooting!
- Coming back up.

Three minutes and counting!

Two craps!

Come on, 11!

Give me the dice.

Hit them harder.

Boys, I think our lucky streak's
just ended.

Better cash them in, boys!


All right, guys, shut her down.

Shut her down!

- She is shut down.
- No time for jokes, fellas.

- Do I sound like I'm laughing, sweetheart?
- You think Nagel was...?


Down the street. Safely, safely.
Right this way, everybody.

Down the street, safely, please.

Safely, right this way.
Right this way, everybody.

George, what are you doing?
The earthquake's over!

They gotta get back!
We gotta get them back in!

Sir, it's the evacuation plan. I...

It's all over now. We can get back to us.

- Feel my heart. Lenny, feel it.
- No... What...?

Oh, no. That's gonna stain.
Why don't we take these off?

- It's white wine.
- Off. Get them off.

- It's white wine! Oh, boy. Okay.
- Hold it right there!

- FBI.
- Oh, dear God.


This man, Lenny Pepperidge,
a.k.a. Lenny the Pep...

...a.k.a. Sheldon Wills,
a.k.a. Little Timmy Hartwell...

...is a confidence man.
- Okay, that's not the whole...

- Help her up.
- Oh, my God.

He infiltrates high-end establishments
through legitimate business contacts.

He was gonna drug you and replace
the real diamonds with these.

- My God. Oh, my God.
- And that's not all.


Oh, my God.

Oh, Abby. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

- No, I really like you.
- Shut up.

- Oh, I am so finished.
- Don't let it bother you.

- I'm finished.
- He's a professional at allaying suspicion.

And seducing women of a certain age.

You know, if Bank hears about this,
I am...

I'll be delicate in my report.
Get her statement.

Thank you, Agent Caldwell.

I'll need your full name.

Thank you.

I'm glad your mother
didn't have to see that.

You just don't wanna admit
the Brody played.

It's a little early for a victory lap.

I hate to break this up,
but did you make the switch?

Yeah. Everything went according to plan.
We're heading to the roof.

- Did you hear that?
- I'm ready.

You know, it's not that I'm just
so desperate to celebrate.

I need you to acknowledge that it wasn't
a prop for prop's sake. The nose played.

And, in a way, it was kind of
perversely dignified.

Look, let's just finish the job.

There he is.

Oh, what the hell? What the hell?

Come on.

Now, give me the diamonds.

- Come on.
- Give him the diamonds.

A gun?

Come on, let's go!

Tough night.
Half a billion running out the door.

Gonna roll over and die?

You think you hit me.

You don't even know
where my soft targets are.

I'm still a two handicap on a golf course,
you know.

I got the hottest new hotel on The Strip.

And I'm a shoo-in
for the Five Diamond Award...

...yet again.

- You sure about that?
- Sure? I got that baby...

All sewn up.

This town might've changed,
but not me.

I'm gonna let you down.

I know people highly invested
in my survival.

And they are people who really know
how to hurt.

In ways you can't even imagine.

Well, first, I know all the guys
that you'd hire to come after me.

They like me better than you.

Second, you're not gonna
go to the cops because...

Let's face it.
You're not gonna go to the cops.

Third, you shook Sinatra's hand.

You should know better, Willy.

My diamonds.

No, no, no.

What's this?

That's just the deed to 4.6 acres
of prime real estate...

...at the north end of The Strip.

The moment you become embarrassed
of who you are, you lose yourself.

I changed my house,
the way I dressed, what I ate...

...for what? For nothing.

There he is.

Thanks for those letters.

They brought me back.

You're more than welcome.

- Hello.
- Hi.

Looking for Terry. It's Danny Ocean.

- Danny.
- Terry.

You called an audible last night.

That's what I do
when I see a blitz coming.

- A blitz?
- Toulour happened to be on the roof...

...at the exact moment that we were
coming out with those diamonds.

- How'd you know I'd go for them?
- Because you're you and I'm me.

We were watching Toulour
while you had him watching us.

This is your end,
which you donated to charity.

- Charity?
- Camp To Belong.

The kids are grateful. They're gonna
have you up to visit next month.

Now, you know that wasn't our deal.

If you feel that strongly about it,
we'll yank the kids out of the camp...

...and send them back
to their foster homes, all 200 of them.

- You think this is funny?
- Well, Terry, it sure as shit ain't sad.

Why these children?

Well, I was just very moved by
the kind of work they're doing there.

And you gotta start somewhere.

And luckily, you know,
the casino business is doing well...

... and I hope there's
more millions to come...

... that we can spread around
to other organizations.

But like I said,
I was very moved by that place.

All you gotta do is look
inside a child's eyes and...

And that's all it needs...
That's all the motivation that one needs.

- Well, thank you for being an angel for us.
- Thank you.

- Like I said, I'm just following her lead.
- Thank you. Terry Benedict. We'll be back.

Well, I gotta jump. My dad's working
a frame. He's got a part for me in it.

- Congratulations.
- Nice going.

See you when I see you.

So I guess it's just
the Susan B. Anthony, then, again.

I never get tired of it.

- Can't get too close. He's probably still...
- Right.


See you when I see you.

Hey, next time try keeping
the weight off in between.

You ought to settle down,
have a couple of kids.

- We'll call standbys in a few minutes.
- Please.

Please, I gotta get out of here.

Maybe you'll get lucky this time.

Hey, you dropped these.

Go ahead. I got a plane to catch.

Actually, try this one.
It's been paying out.

I won! Look at this!

I won $ 11 million. Can you believe it?

Look at that! I won $ 11 million.
Did you see that?

I can't believe it!

Special thanks to SergeiK.