The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus script is here for all you fans of the Terry Gilliam movie with Heath Ledger. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus Script



Ladies and Gentlemen... Step up!

Step up!

I, Mercury, the messenger
of the gods, invite you...

invite you to serve...

To light the one night only here...

And this night we will enter,
into the mind...

the very great mind,

of Doctor Parnassus!

Doctor Parnassus!

Yes, ladies and gents, Dr Parnassus's
as old as time.

Yes! He's over thousend years old.

He has power, to empower...your mind.

Let Doctor Parnassus
open your imagination.

Let him transport you...

to worlds you've never dreamt of...
- Oh God, check out the lights.

Check out that?

Transcend the heights on Beauty's wing.

Or, if you must...
scour the squalid depths

with Putrid's brother, Stench!

Join the queue! Only
five quid a go!

No bigger bargain while
planet earth lasts!

You choose...fulfilment...

You cannot be here.
No ticket, no prize ser.

Are you drunk, little man?
What are you doing?

Hey! Get off the stage!

Thas a nice pair of tits
- I said, get off the stage!


I wan you... Com ere ma...
Com ere ma...Hey!

There she is! Come here, gorgeous!
Come here.

Come here, gorgeous.

Come back, you bitch!

Miss..Oh, oh...

Miss! Me face!
My God, what is this?

Marty?! - Jesus! What you...

He went with that cow!
I'll scratch her eyes out!

Oi! You two!

My boyfriend is still there!

Anybody there?!

Anybody there? Please!
Is anybody there?

Please! Please!


Help me!


I will never drink, I promise...


From now on I swear, not a drop!

You've chosen well!

The Master Parnassus's
esteem way is long.

But with person garance,
and best dedication

the heights are attentive.

It's very time spring in your step

will the solemn in your heart,
the clouds will come.

The heavens will look,

and you son.

Hi there. C'mon in. Looks like you
could use a drink.

Let me just one drink.


For me one double.

The one I lost.

I lost again.

What did you think you were doing..?
- He was chasing me.

You don't go through the mirror!
Never! You know that!

Oi! You! Gunga Din!

Come here!

What do you think
you're playing at!? - Playing?

Oh, no, no, no...
We don't play!

What we do is deadly serious!

Gone. Will we miss him?
I don't think so.

Don't worry if you don't understand
it all immediately.

I want you freaks out of here!
Now! Ah!

I'm sorry. I didn't mean
to use that word...

vertically deficient...defuncted...
vertically crippled!


Vertically challenged?
Why do you all get off my beat...

or I will do the lot of
you for something!

Come here. Come here.

Take a ticket! Wait your turn!

Twenty quid a go, reduced to five
for one night only!

Ladies and gentlemens,
this world are we living,

is full of enchantment,
for those with eyes to see...


I want to go there and there...
- Stop going on, Linda!

They won't let you, darling.
- But I want to!!! I want to!!!

- You're never let me to!

Excuse me! Excuse me!
- It's not fair!

Would you mind...
- Where's Diego?!

- This is your fault!

He went right there.
He's just gone through.

Diego! Diego!

Die! Die! Yes!

Please exit the Imaginarium

Joystick's not available without
parenting control.


If one of you perverts got our boy,

I won't be answerable
for my actions.

Diego! - Diego! - Diego!

I looked everywhere.
- I don't care!


- Oh it worked.

Diego, where have you been?
I've been worried sick!

One little devil out of the fire!

Why that silly expression
on your face, you little poof.

Come on, get up! Come on!
-...itself rouse of Dr. Parnassus.

Thank you.

- Yes, sir?

You know the rules about
the mirror? - Yes.

Yes I do. I'm sorry, sir.
I'm really sorry...

I know, I know.
You did well, my boy.

You did well.
Good lad, good lad.

Thank you.

'Good lad, good lad.'

You go through the mirror and
he's all over you.

I do it once and he disturbs...

C'mon now, Valentina...
you're his daughter...

I mean...irresistibly scrumptious...

Why do I say scrumptious?

Beautiful, intelligence, sweet...

Scrumptious, idiot!

Hey Parny...

It's been a while.

What did I say?

We don't have all night.

Oh, chicks again.

He's come to collect.

I thought so. He's early.

What can I do?

- There must be something...

How many days left?
- Three.

You know, you're gonna have
to tell her soon.

When the moon hits your eye
like a big pizza pie,

that's amore...
- Will you shut up about food?

We're clean out...and I'm starving!

Oh, Perci. We've still
got a few potatoes.

Hey, look at this.
Look at this. - Hey!

That's mine!
- Oh, look at that!

That's private!

Give it to me!


Do you really think you'd be happy
in a place like that? Would you?

I couldn't do.

Maybe a part of you...

I don't know...

You are always looking
for escaping, aren't you?

Let's do it. Why not, you and me?

I can't run away.
We can't run away. I can't.

I'm under age.

I shall be twelve on Wednesday.
- Don't be ridiculous.

Perci, how old will I be on Wednesday?
- Twelve.

See? That's what Parnassus says.

Are you saying he's ridiculous? - No.

Actually...I'm really sixteen.

Sweet sixteen.

The age of consent...

You could use a coffee.

Oy! There is none of it.
- Yes, I know, I know...

And that again?

Not now, not now...

I have something very
important to tell you.

Oh...Why does everybody
want to live forever?

Immortality's a bloody curse.

So is pretending to be a child.

Look at me. I mean, look at me.

Nobody's fooled!

And I want this stupid
thing off my ankle.

You can't stop me growing up just
by lying about my birthday! - Shut up...

It's ridiculous!
- Shut up and listen to me!

I need to explain something,
before it's too late.

One, winter's night...
- Is this going to take long?

Yes, yes...quite possibly.

Many years ago...
many centuries ago, in fact...

I was, believe or not,
a young monk.

Someone visited me, in my sanctuary...

Someone I had hoped
never to meet.

Someone none of us
should ever hope to meet...

... Having captured the wind
and tamed the storm,

kept the stars in their orbit and
the earth turning on its axis ...

The Chief Steward,
laying down to take his rest,

had a most disturbing dream...

He dreamt that a hooded rider

was approaching across
the snow-swept plain.

Chief Steward woke...

What exactly do you all do here?

We tell the eternal story.

And, what is that exactly?

The story that sustains the universe.

The story without which
there is nothing.


You mean, if you stop
telling this story...

and whole the universe
ceases to exist?

You make it sound so simple.

And you believe it?

We're ordained for this task.

It's just incredible to me that

you can believe something
that can be so easily disproved.

No, I don't think so.

We'll see.



There. The story's stopped.

No more story...
And we're still here...

The fire's still burning...
It's still snowing.

The wind's still blowing.

Nothing is changed.

Come on, cheer up...

I've freed you from all
this ridiculous nonsense.

Now you can use your powers to do
something else.

Have fun.

Learn for language or...go on cruise.

A sign! A message!

That bird was a messenger...

from some distant places
we know not of!

I see rule cleared.

It has nothing to do with us here.

Somewhere in the world,
right now...

Someone else is telling a
story! A different story!

A saga...a romance...a tale
of an unforeseen death.

It doesn't matter!
It's sustaining the universe.

That's why we're still here.

You can't stop stories being told!

That's weak hypothesis!
- I don't think so.

I tell you...You're probably
not a betting man, aren't you?


Not my first wager
made with the devil...

You see, if any first of us two
attract twelve disciples,

would win the bet.

His argument... the necessities
of danger. Here.

The fabled bliss of ignorance.

Mine, the power of the imagination to
transform and illuminate our lives...

It was a hard fight...I won.

My prize...The one thing
I coveted the most...

was ever-lasting life.

Everlasting torment...

He had tricked me.
Had let me win.

He knew times would change...

That one day, no one would
want my stories...

This was the price of my arrogance...

Forgotten. Lost.
Alone and desperate.

We've stopped.
- Go on, with your story.

Another time. Something's happened.
You'd better go and see.

Why do you always do this?!

You always stop in the
middle of your story!

Go and see.

I saw...someone d-dancing...
on the water.

I swear! I swear!

When the lightning flashed...
There was a shadow...

...Over there. You see that?

You see the dancer?
- Yeah, he's riverdancing.

Yes, he's riverdancing!
You see that?

That's someone hanging!

He's hanging over the bridge!

- Get a rope!

If he's hanging by his neck,
he's already got a rope.

Get a rope!
- Alright!

We're good!
Okay, alright, alright...!

Go, go, go!

There, swing you in!

Are you okay?

Why are you fishing dead
people out of the river?

Leave him. He's already dead!

Let's get hell out of here,
before police shows up.

Anton! Come, help me.

No, no, no...So will do I.

I'll do. Watch out.

We don't know where
he's b-been anyway.

Ready? All clear?

He's alive!
- Well, he was.

What the hell is that on earth?

Put him in the trunk.

The boss said leave him.
- He thought he was dead. Come on.

I d-don't like it.

It's none of our b-business.

What are you suggesting, we leave
him on the side of the road?

Definitely. Let's go.

Come on.

Hey, you!

I suppose somebody saves your life
everyday of the week. - What?

Is it too much bother
with a thank you?

Huh...who are you?

Percival St. Antoine della Touraine

et Sansepolcro da Piemonte, the Third.

If that seems too difficult,
you may call me Percy.

Where are we?

Geographically speaking,in the
Northern Hemisphere.

Socially, on the margins and,
narratively, with some way to go.

And your name is...

I can't remember.
- That's pretty handy.

Any credit cards?
- Ah! Are you trying to rob me?

What are you doing?
- ...with your name on them.

Where's my wallet, where's my phone...?
- Don't look at us.

Who are you?
- He can't remember.

Listen...Whoever you people are...

I need to go now, alright?

Might be for you.

There you are!

Pity...I speak Russian.

Hello. Are you alright?


Sorry, mate. Excuse me, mate.
Thank you fellow.

But you can't stay here.
- Why not?!

He's not one of us.
Look at him! Look at him!

...Without reason...excuse me...
We don't know what he's done.

Listen, I haven't done
anything, alright? - Alright.

I'm Englishman. I understand
where you're comming from.

I understand where
I'm comming from.

And I don't know my name.

I don't no where I go, I don't no...

And you certainly don't
know what that is.

The last thing I remember is
being w-whacked in head,

and waken up in that
box in the back of the...

one of the...
Honest...honest... head.

What the hell is going on here?

I told you to leave him.
He was dead.

Well, he isn't and we didn't.

We found him hanging
on the bridge, sir.

Hanging? - Yeah.
- By his neck til death.

If we'd had any sense.

We found these in his pockets.

The hanged man!

Scrumpy. Get out my way.

Signs are all clear.

And those marks...
I recognize them.

What marks? - You've been sent
by Mr Nick, haven't you?

Mr Nick? - I knew it!
You know his name.

He has a new proposition for
me doesn't he?

A new wager perhaps?

Another twist in the game?

He can't help himself, can he?

Thank God! Thank God for that!

Dad says you shoud work...
To focus your mind.

To get your memory back.

Here we are. Try this.

You can help out front.
Sell tickets or...

Something like that.

What do you say?


So, no name. No face.

The mystery thickens.
- Get your...

...grubby little hands off me.

Valentina, we have a problem...
- So strange.

Complete blank.
- I can dress myself.

Let me go, I said, Percy!

Perci, no more!!

Hey! Hey, come on.


Oh, I'll be sick of that.

Is your memory less impaired?

Is all comming back to you now?

What? No...
- Ah, you're bloody useless!

It's a bloody disaster!
- You can't go on. You're drunk.

I am not drunk!
I'm grumpy!


L-L-L-ladies and gentlemens,
raise your sights for one night only...

- Where's George?

...the majesty, the beauty,
the miracle that's in each,

...that's every on...
- Where's George?

W-W-Who's George?
- I thought we should give him a name.

Oh, that's cute...George.

I'm closing up.
- Yeah, let's do that.

He's never not done a show...
What's wrong with him?

- N-n-no.

It wouldn't trouble that
compete of yours.

You do your thing...
All beautiful...Alright!

Okay. Ladies and...well, ladies!

I am rented to present
you the extraordinary...

Doctor Parnassus!

This man is drunk. Dead drunk.
- Ah, that's disgraceful.

Not drunk! - No, he's not. He's a...
- He's got a bad cold. a bad cold. Dispite that,
he's still went on tonight,

at considerable risk to his health...

A round of applause,
ladies and gents!

We want our money back.
Every penny.

Would you...

Alright, listen, I'll give
your money back, alright?

I understand. Listen...
to tell the truth.

The Doctor's daughter, right?
She looks pretty, but she hates it.

She's pretty sick, you see.

She's going on surgery.
She scratched all can get.

She's gonna...That's all this is about.
This is money for her.

You understand?
I mean, how values...

we get you free tickets.
No, wait. We can do two

free tickets if you buy
another one at half price.

This offer is only available today.

What? - No, nothing.

'This offer is only available today.'

He took all that? - Yeah.
Have you ever seen so much?

That's what lying through
teeth can get you.

C'mon, Anton... How was he to know
that we're not be here tomorrow?

Hey, maybe my birthday
won't be so bad.

Yeah, maybe it wont' actually.
Maybe we can get out of this dump.


Oi, George! Wrong end of
the horse, mate!

What was that?

You know, You shouldn't drink.
It doesn't agree with you.

Oh, you're sooo right.

You? What do you want
this time? I'll do anything.

I know you will. - By the way,
you man's lost his memory.

He's bloody useless!
- He's not my man. - What?

This little toe-rag.
Name's Tony Shepherd.

He used to run a big charity.

I wouldn't trust him. You don't
trust me do you? - No.

Just tell me what you want.

I just thought last night,
seeing you so upset,

that you can maybe use
a little glimmer of hope...

Maybe you can use a little bet?

No, it's over. Finito.

Oh, come's never over.

C'mon, what you got to lose?
You could end by winning.

You can save her....

What do you say...
First to five souls?

First to five?

No tricks? No cheating?
- No. No cheating.

I say 'Yes'.
- I do love a betting man.

By her birthday then.
- That is today! You bastard!

Do you have any idea what rough
business we're doing?

Things are going to pick up.
As sure as eggs is eggs.

Okay. The first five souls wins.

I'll kill you! You son of bitch!

I know. I'm glad to see you.


Morning, Val.
- Hi, George.



Food! Food! We got food!
We got bread! We got cheese!

We got vegetables! We got everything!
Whatever this thing is...

It's all your fault we're
eating so well today.

Do you know how to pluck?

Is t-t-t-that Bertie?

George thought doves
would be better. Pluck it.

To pluck it? But - how?

Never mind.

Five souls in two days, eh!?
- What sarcasm. I'm trying to think.

He's been sent to us
for a reason. I know it.

The cards don't lie. - No?

Pardonnez-moi monsieur St. George...

I worried about you,
not knowing who you are...

It must be extremly difficult
to understand. - Yeah.

Really it is, it is...It's confusing.
- I may be able to help.- Really?

Yes. You see this contraption here?

Just...if you don't mind placing
on your head. That's it.

Now, see those wires?
Just...hold on to that.

Now, I just want you to relax.
Try to think of nothing.

That won't difficult...
in my condition. - Shut it!

I beg your pardon?
- You're mouth! Don't breath!

Hold your breath!
- Excuse me?

Let the energy flow.
Let the...wax and wane.

Think of the earth, the ocean, ...

Very good, very good.

Middle name...middle name...

I have the name.

Anthony Shepherd.

They call you Tony.

That was exausting.

You used good
works as I understand.

Something about a charity...I think? Shepherd...

Wow! You...This is...

It really works...

Was anything else you discovered
when you were doing your...

Well, you must understand,
this is an ancient technique.

- I'm extremly rusty.

No, there was apsolutely nothing.

It's fascinating, sir.

It really is I may say.

Cant I take this off now? - Yeah.

Thank you very much.
- No, not at all.

Bless you! I have a name!
- A cherity work?

Cool. - So what was he doing dangling
by his neck under the bridge?

Percy! - Oh, was that rude?

Have I put my foot in it?

No, no, it's a...

It's so strange. It's horrible.

Everything it's just complete blank.

As the good doctor said I was
involved in some sort of charity...

I do remember that now.
Here you go. Plucked.

What a fool I must have been,
that think I could have...

...change the world, that
I could make it different...

to give people

What an arrogant idiot.

I must have ache.
What's that?

Hey, may I have look at that?
What is that you got?

Oh it's Beethoven's Ode to Joy.
- No, not the song. The pipe.

- It belongs to me.

Really? - Yeah.
- How do you know that?

You remembered? You just remembered,
you're a musician. - Oh, yeah.

Now that I'm remembering,
can I have it please back?

Are you sure it's yours?
- Positively.

How can you be sure?
- I just know, simply.

Can I have it  back?
- Yes, alright...

It's g-gone.
- I want my pipe back, please.

It means a lot to me. - Yea, I understand.
- It's a very special pipe.

Okay, sorry.
Sorry, there it is. Sorry.

Listen, this isn't funny, mate.
That pipe means a lot to me.

Alright? - A little bit funny.

No, it's not a little bit funny.
- Alright...Alright!

Alright, let me just look around.

What is it doing in the tea pot?
That's what I wanna know.

What is it doing in the tea pot?
- I don't know.

Now, I thank you very much.

Okay. Sorry.
I was trying to bond.

Alright! Alright!

Okay...I'm gonna get it.

Right now! - Alright. Sure.
Just chill out.

Just chill out. There.

Antone, enough.
- I'm sorry, I'm just trying...

play aroud, make bound.
- Well, stop.

Just trying

Okay. It was fun!
- Yeah, funny, funny...

I'm worried about Anton...
What's eating him?

He's in love with Valentina. - In love?
Who gave him permission?

It happens.
- The little snake!

I take him from the streets
and this is my thanks and I...

I'll skin him alive!
- While you're at it,

there's the other one.
- The other one? - A rattle snake.

Oh, I forgot for cobra.
- Oh, Tony?

Tony's another kettle
of fish. - Is he?

He's ambitious, energetic...
A man of destiny.

And he's going to help us win?
- I think he just might.

Scrumpy sees good in him.
- She'd be better off with Anton.

Perhaps I should just offer her hand to

whoever helps us
win the next five souls.

That's even worse idea than
the other you've had today.

You're not wrong. Neither of them
is worthy of her.

You're never wrong, aren't you?

Ah, Percy...What would
I do without you?

Get a midget. - What?
- Y'know, short fellow.

Short legs, short feet, a head...
- Yes, I know...

Doctor Parnassus, as old
as the universe itself, vast...

Hello. How are you doing tonight?

Has he been drinking?

What are you doing? Stop playing
about! - Seek no more!

We must concentrate tonight.
Everything depends on it.

Lets the great mind of this Doctor...

transport the world...

of your imagination.

You my dear, your destiny
is a very, specialy...

What stupid bouncer.

No, no...a singer.
I bet your voice...

Hi, there!

Come on trust me, you're gonna
love this experience.

Hey, what are you doing?

Taking you to the heart of your
imagination! - Oh, my God!

No way. - Trust me young lady,
you will not regret.

Go for it Sal!
- Only if she comes with me.

Can't you two at the same time!

Are you crazy? Go for it.
- I'm not going on my own.

We'll do it together! - Good idea!
- Are you crazy?

Two imaginations in there,
at same time?

No, no, ladies...
One a time is fine.

When are two, the stronger imagination
will overcome the weaker and

we have no idea
what might happen.

That's really stupid.
- Yea, really stupid.

Follow me. Enjoy yourselfs.

Put me down!

I don't want to do it alone!
- She doesn't do it alone!

It's about time. And your
life will change mysteriously.

Why don't you put me down?
- It's alright. - No, please! Dont!

We got a customer.




Hi, there.


What were you thinking?
Look what you've done.

Jesus! Leave us alone.

Get out of here! Leave!

First to five...

First to five...
Just wonder first to five.

You! We gotta keep moving!
- I know, I'm sorry.

Get out of my sight!
- Alright. Alright.

Jesus! - What are you doing?
You made a mess!

Get out of here, come on!

You're not helping!
- Alright...I'm gone.

I wonder if covered by insurance.
- Bugger off!

Alright, I'm just talking.

It's quite intresting crowd tonight.
- I wouldn't know.

Just leave me alone, mate.

How do you...

Val is little worried about you, mate.

She wanted me to come
and chat with you, pal.

What happened today, and to the
young lady behind the mirror?

We suggestively...

Anton, you can tell me, mate.
We all heard her scream.

I was screaming as well.

It was terrifying. - Terrifying?
I don't understand.

No...You wouldn't. You haven't been
inside the Doctor's mind, haven't you?

No, I haven't. - Yeah,
you probably think it's

some kind of scam, don't you?
- Well?

No, it's not.

I wouldn't expect you to understand.

Not in a million years.

If Doctor Parnassus can really
control people's mind,

why isn't he ruling the world, eh?

Why bother with this little...side show?

'Side show'? He d-don't want
to rule the world.

He wants the world to
rule itself!


What about the mirror?
What's that about, eh?

A bit of hocus-pocus?
- Tony, you don't get it, man.

It is...

It's impossible to describe.
It's - a mystery!

It's everything as real
as seen with eyes,

it beholds the universe...
- By the way,...- Behind the mirror.

Does first to five, mean
anything to you?

You're suppose to be
the clever one.

It's utterly hopeless...
It is over...

Don't say that...
It's never over.

Parnassus is immortal, remember?

Honestly, it's gonna be okay, dad.

How can you understand?

You are a child.
You've never loved.

Not like I have...

From the moment I looked up,
and saw her,

I was capivated.

Imprisoned by her.

And I was thousend years old.

How could I woo her?

How could I ever
make her mine?

Don't be a fool! You can't die!

You're immortal!
You'll just end up broken,

in the eternity ward, and I'll...

Go, you little devil!


At times like these,
the devil is never far away.

Why so long, Parny?

Such a vaste the positive.

The devil granted me mortality again...

And youth and new powers.
Greater powers.

And I won her.
I was so in love...

So in love...

But at what price...?

What price...?

Wassup, doc?

At what price...?

It's only cuts and bruises.

I thought we'd lost you.

Sweetheart! Why that sad face?

Look at here. Val, I thought
about your father and

seems to be in terrible state,
you know?

Now, is it financial thing?
Is it money?

I don't know... - Cause if it is,
I could help in that area.

I don't know. - You don't know
or is it the show, perhaps?

I don't care about the show anymore.

What about the police?
- Bring on the police.

I'm sick of living like this...

Oh, really...

Now listen. You shouldn't talk this way.

It's very important what
you're doing. It's family stuff.

Maybe it's just...things ought
to be done in little different way.

What sort of “different”
way do you suggest?

Morning. How are you doing?
How did you sleep last night?

That was a nasty
bump on the head you got...

“Different?” What do you mean?

Well, I've been thinking sir, that....

it's quite obviously, people...
not many people,

are attracked to the show.
- Oh, thank you so much.

Forgive me but...I-I-I have couple
solutions to the problem.

One, I was thinking of changing
the style of the show.

And two, I would a...

Change the audience, perhaps.

Change? - Yeah.

In my oppinion, I'd change both.

You know, that's just me...
- Change a show?

Who the frigging hell
do you think you are?

Don't be sorry to find a change, mate.

The fact and the matter is, this
show, the stage - this is not...

I-I-I don't know the word is, it's...
- Modern?

Modern? Yes.

You see, people want modern.
I want, you know, like...

Like this. This is contemporary.
This is what people want.

I know this world. Trust me.

Now, with you and your mind control,

we need to meet the public halfway.
The right public,

the right part of town.
- What about the filth?

What? - The filth.
- He means the Police.

There'll be a better
class of filth, too.

That'll be the day.
- Yeah, listen.

T-T-The secret is not to hide.

Be bold. Be colorful.

Or, acctually, be less colorful,

And go to the places that people
would never expect to be at.

You know? Think.

So, you saved my life.

Now let me do something
in return, for you. Please.


Do you believe in
coincidence? - No.

There's no such thing...
You've always told me.

Everything has a reason.
- Yes, that's what I believe.

And the cards?
Do you believe in them?

What about that? This it a test?

This is gonna be an
extremely important day.

Do we gamble on Tony?

I want your opinion...
I need your advice.

I don't believe it.
You want my oppionion.

That's the best birthday
present ever!

Yes! Gamble! Let's do it!
- Yes!

Let's do it!

Oh, I love you dad.

...And the devil take the hindmost!

Well, lovely.
- Yeah. How sweet.

So, what do we do now?

Well, lets see...First of all, how much
money do we have to play with?

Cause, we gonna need all of it.

Anton! What are you doing?

Didn't you do enough
damage last night?

Anton! I'm the one who
wants to run away!

Please, don't spoil my birthday.
We need you.

I need you.

How much money have you got?

Look my dear, did you look inside?

We are here to give,
not take, my darling.

But nevertheless, since you are

very, very generous lady,...

Excuse me but, how does this work?
What does it cost?

Cost - no. The Imaginarium
doesn't cost a penny.

How long does that take?
- Well, it depends, my dear.

I'm running late.
- Oh, late, late, for very modern date.

I can't tell you.

Listen, can I ask you a question?

Do you really,
or shoud I say...

Can you put a price
on your dreams?

Or the dreams of the less
fortunate in this world?

Is there a price to them?

Or are you willing to spare to inability
to change what is wrong in this world?

You see, I am for dreams.

But I too , walked away for whit.

I ignored it, I had no time for it.

Does it sound familiar to you?
Yes? I know, my dear.

But, you see, ladies and genetlemens,
I was saved...

By a miracle.

By Doctor Parnassus!

He gave me my life back again.

He's given me reason to dream.

He took me into the waterfall
of happiness!

And I was reborn.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen,
I can tell you now...

I have been...No! I AM purified.

Ladies, ladies! We're solidly
booked right now.

Listen, if we all make reservation...

Is that child up for adoption? - Yes.

I want to adopt that
unfortunate black child.

It shouldn't be
working like this.

It should be in school.
Who's in charge here?

You are my lady.
- Down.

Don't you touch me.
- Don't be affraid, my dear.

Everything's okay, officers.

Tonight is a night. Don't you
want to be purified?

This is your time.

How can she be...? - Liar!

She has been chosen, my dear.

A right chance, Doctor.
- I haven't paid a thing.

You could make a donation on the
way out if you feel you need to.

Some people do. Most people do.

Believe me my dear, you're
the luckiest lady alive.

Now, good luck!

This is way so exciting.
This is fuzzier.

So many temptations.
Maybe just a peek?

Wait, Tony!

Oh, how gorgeous!

Ah, so gorgeous.

Ah...It's me!

Thank you...

Who are you, dear?

I've always known
much about you.

And I don't even know
your name.

It's Rodger.

No, it's not. It's Berry.
- Berry? - Yes.

How dashing.

Oh, goodness me!

Just a minute, madam.
No, no, just a

If I'm not mistaken, I believe
you have to go alone.

Why would I want to go there
without you my darling?

Well...It's one of the rules.

One imagionation at the time,

free from the influence of another.


Don't kill the messenger, babe.

Oh, look! Come!

Another possibility...
Come, come.

You have to make a choice.

And to be honest, I'd
strongly recommend this one.

The gondola.

But...Rudolph Valentino,

James Dean, Princess Di...

All those people...
They're all dead.

Yes, but...

Immortal, nevertheless.

They won't get old or fat.

They won't get sick or feeble.

They are beyond fear...

Because, they are forever young.

They are gods.

And you can join them.

You're such a wonderful speaker.

I know. Get in the boat.

Actually, there's one more thing.
Look at me.

This is very, very...important.

Your sacrifice, must be absolutely pure.

Therefor, you will need to
relinquish all of your...

...worldly posesion.
- Neither of them will miss me, then.

Yes, neither of them.
And this.

Oh, look at that.

Now, this one.

Got it! You're free!
- Thank you.

Bye, bye! Bye!
- Ciao, ciao!

Prepare to be reborn.
And remember...

Nothing's permanent...
Not even death.


Oh, no!


Did I just get off the mirror,
right now?

How do you do that?
- Oh, It's nothing.

- Voila?

How beautiful it is...
How beautiful...

Thank you, madam. You give
me the strength to continue.

What name?
I'll give everything.

Thank you.


Take me!



One more to go and
we are free.

What are you watching that
crap for. - It's him!

What are you talking about?

Who are you talking about?
Impossible. - He's alive.

Let's go. - Get him!

Where are we?
Where did he go?

Boss, you speak english!
Me too.

Hi! Hello! Today's special...

Reach for the clouds!
Discover your true potential!

You too can become rich,
famous, celebrated.

Using no organic
produce or nut free foods,

just discover
the power within you.

Market research has shown that...
- There he is!

Where? Where?

Relax... Smell the flower.






Tony saves Tibet


Come on!


I want him dead!

Kill him!

Stop! Give me a chance!

That's not him.
I told you that's not him.

It's not?

It has to be.

Jose is right!

He's's not me!

It has to be.


He think he fool us...
- No, my Jose.

No wait! Listen to me.

You stole my money.
I will make you die again.

This time...


Hey, hey!

Excuse me!

Would you mind bring him down!

What did you play at?

You're independ now, playing with
your soldiers and your toys?

No, this is human being!

Now, he's commin' with me.

Maybe you can sell this
with some fisting cuffs?

Alright, you're first...
you're up. Alright.

Bring it old man.
Bring in on this ...

Let's do hard Ok?

You first! You first!
You first!

Relax. Smell the flower.


Oh my God...

What she's doing...?

Hi boys! Channel that violence
for the good!

Go on! Do it now!

Come on, men!
Join us today!


- Mama!


Wait! Run away!

Wrong choice!
Come back!


Come back!

Hey, Parny!


Rather steak.

Anton! Anton!

Wakey, wakey.

Wakey, wakey.
Anton, I need your help.

Wakey, wakey, you gonna help me.
- I'm awake.

Did you see me...??
- Yeah.

You were great.
- ...............

I mean, I nearly touched...
Clouds were incredible...

I was true itself.
- Who are you?

It's Tony. Tony.

Tony. - No it's not Tony.
You're not Tony.

No, It's not Tony.
- Use your imagination.

Use your imagination...


Look, I need your help.

You know Parnassus's mind...

How to get back to
those ladders?

So you're Tony, right?
If you're Tony...

What was the name of my chicken?


Do you know what a deal is
like to a god!

A lungs full of air...
I was sovereign!

The big russian men with
the fist in my face.

That's not important.
- It is important!

You stole their money.

No, I didn't. - You stole their money!
I heard them say

with my own ears! - Are you gonna
believe them before you believe me?

Yeah, my ass. And what are these?

And you expect me to...
You're marks on your forhead!

Marks? - I don't know,
something satanic...

Listen, those were irredeemably bad men.

Okay? And I'm essentially good...

Sorry. Tony is trying to
be what - a prim?

And self righteous, yes.

You're always to be honest...
You're the truth.

I love the truth.
- Really?

Just for once, just for me, eh?

What about charity, handsome?
- Charity for kids.

I needed money.

And I accepted a loan from those men.

I know it? I didn't know.

They laundered their dirty
money through the charity.

I know I was stupid!

I made a mistake.

And the kids...who took life...

They were inocence.

I-I carry that every day.

Every day of my life.


You wanted the truth.
- Sorry.

You alright?

Thank you - for that.

Where are the ladders?
Will you show me?


Anton? Hey, pal.
Don't leave...

Don't leave me here.

Hey, don't leave me.
Come on, I almost died today!

Don't leave me.
Hey, come on. I can...

I needed the money.
- Oh, when you run the charity?

I needed more time...
the red tape, the bureaucracy...

How many more times does he
have to say he's sorry?

That is ridiculous.

Bring him down.
- Listen, Valentina, look at me.

Why can't you see,
that he betrayed us and

fooled us always - hilarious.

Just jealous. - Jel...

I'm not jealous!
I'm not jealous.

Perci, open the hatch.

Why would he want him to come in?
He knows we don't like him.

Come on you guys,
look at those stuffs!

Have you forgotten what it was
like before we found him?

No, no! I haven't forgoten, Valentina.

He was so pure. Will you
please, unzipp me?

And women? You saw
the faces may came out.

I saw his faces. I saw both of his
faces. Yes, at least two.

My birthday. This was
supposed to be celebrating...

At least Tony remembered.

Would you, please, just listen
to me for one second?

No, he isn't

Let him in...It's Tony?
- No... I think not.

Sit down.

Can somebody please, answer the door?

I can't stand not
answering the door.

Or the telephone
- drives me crazy.

That's my nature.
I won't be able to sleep.

Just think like that.

Well, you won.

It's over.

Four rotten Russkies?
- And the girl, from the pub?


Sally doesn't count.
Do you, gal?

That's how you take your
pleasure, isn't it? Toying with me.

C'mon.. Sal didn't get to
make a real choice.

You were out for the count.
Wouldn't be fair..

You got four. So, got
your friend Tony.


We're's not quite over.

Not quite.

Oh, oh, look at the time...
It's almost 11.


We need another performance.
Now! Quickly!

Get...Get ready to move out!

Who was that? - Oh,
just somebody asking the way.

Tony? Where's...

Tony? Percy?
- What's going on?

Not now Scrumpy! Not now!

Where's Tony?
- What are you hiding?

It's something to do with that
bloody rambling stories

you were telling me, isn't it?
The story you never finished.


I want to know the truth.

The truth?

I am thousands of years old,

I have been immortal and...

I did make a bargain
with the devil.

For that woman,
from the story...? - Yes.

Your mother...

I regained my youth...

And I won her...
We lived in joy....

We grew old together. Then one day
she came and told me she was pregnant.

That - sixty years old and
pregnant...It was a miracle!

And she died giving birth.

Me? - Yes.

Miracle or a mistake? - You're the
best mistake I ever made.

And the bargain,
with the devil...

There are two parts to a bargain?
- He granted me mortality

on condition, that any children
I would fathered,

when they're the age of sixteen,

would belong to him.

Just telling the story...

A great story!

Why should I believe this?
- Because it's true.

Every word is true.
But, there is a new wager...

But all is not lost...
We can win! We can win!

If I win, you're mine again...
- That's enough!

Listen to me, Scrumpy! Listen to me!
- Listen to youself!

Who are you? I don't
know you anymore!

All my life you've filled my head with
dreams! Your dreams!

You made a deal with the devil!

And what am I?
Patetic bet!

Another mistake!

Val! - Oh, she's gone.

She's gone.
- Telling the truth....

Always a bad idea.

Hold your tongue,
you smug little pustule!

Get out of my sight! And stay out!

Perhaps you'll find a midget...
If you're lucky.





What are you doing? - Trying to
save your daughter's life, sir.


Well, I figured out I could
be your fifth soul.

You see, I can take the risk, sir.

You're good lad, Tony,
but it's not use.

We still have time, don't we?
- Yes, of course, we still have time.

I don't ask anything from you in
return. Just another night show.

You're a saint, my boy!
You're a saint!

But it's useless.
- Let me tell on thing...

How initiation
into the secrets of your trance.

I can't do that.
- Why not?

It won't work...
- I think I could do it.

You're going to teach me...
- It's too late, my friend.

You dont' have to be upset, sir.
You should sound to be happy!

Think about Valentina. And we need
you to be in trance for this to work.

Can you give me that? Come on,
now, close your eyes.

Close your eyes.
Think of the ocean.

The ocean come here and out.

Here...and out.
It's here...



Here - out.


Pull yourself together!
It's not time for playing baby!

It's no good!

Tony...oh, Tony..

You need to calm down,
we need you to relax.

And trying think of...chocolate.

Melting away on the hot stove...

Just melting, melting...

Good, good, good...

The stove is served,
stay with me.

Lie! All lie!
- Alright, calm down.

What is wrong? Talk to me.
- He was lying.  - Who was lying?

What? The Imaginarium?

What are you talking about?
- I can't run away.

Can't run away from what?
You wanna run away from this?

If you want get away I can
take you away from all this.

Alright? I can take you somewhere.

I can get you out of this darkness,

I will take you to the light, alright?

I'll take you somewhere's beautifull.
Just you and me.

Now, trust me.
Come with me now.

Alright? Now, it's gonna be terrified.

Trust me! It will be perfect!


You know, that's bad.
- See, I'm reading about...

We dont' need that nonsense.
Mind if we get going, sir?

He's a lier! He's liar, Val!
- Look, this was in the past.

In the present, I'm more human.

Oh, come on, trust me!
- Shut up!

I don't want to forgive this, mate!

And don't - believe what you
read in the newspapers!

Especially the mirror.

You were right.
The world is beautiful.

I always dreamed it
would be just like this.


What did I say you'd be happy?

Isn't it just - perfect?


If only we didn't have to make
a choice.

It doesn't have to be a choice.
- Sweetheart?

A rule's a rule? - Those are my
father's rules. We're free.

- Oh, really.


Well, I suppose you're right.

Tony, we're free if we want to be.

Let's just let the river do
the choosing.

Now...Kiss me.

Oh, Val,

When the moon hits your eyes

like a big pizza pie...
It's amor...

When the stars make you drool

Joost-a like pasta fazool,
you're in love...

I think I love you, Tony.
- Val...

We should lie him more offten.

To get married...

Make babies...

Come lady, this is my area.

A choce!
- What do you mean?

It's a child, not a choice.

She needs our help.
- Yes.

Hey, it's okay.
Come, we'll help you.

Who is "veliki govno"?

Come on, smile on camera,

This is my world.

Sustainability's great, if
you can achieve it.

The problem is, in many cases you
simply can't get there.

Aren't you running the risk of
entrenching the need for charity

by increasingly institutionalising it?

Oh, look, the unfortunate truism

that charity, like poor little Olga
is always with us, coin a phrase.

Ah, there you are,
my darling!

Ladies and gentlemen,
isn't she a wonder?

Bis smiles...

And what's your message to the

Oh, I wouldn't presume to have a
'message' for the President...

I think luckely for the Foundation
to see, eye to eye on most things.

Tony, if we could have ...
- One sec, love.

Ah, Mr President...

Ladies and gentlemen, please
stand up for Mr President!

They're so many suffering children.

So much opportunity
to do some good deed.

Freddy is gonna make
ready to make a speach

...on the stage.


I have three word to say...

Well - done - Tony.

Are the children, the children?

This is vital moment for
the future of Fondation.

Children of the world
depend on us.




- Yes, yes.

Listen to me. This is
nothing to do with you

This is him.
- Where are you?

This is his imagination!
- Call security now!

Come here, come here

Jesus, Anton, what are you doing?

'The disgraced director of the
children's charity'

"Suffer the Little Children",...

who was arrested last week.

on charges in the sale of organs
from third world children and

selling them to wealthy Westerners'...

Come back.

Hey, that's Anton!

Stop it!

You've betrayed me,
haven't you?

How could you, after all
I've done for you...

Don't you touch you!

I'll show them!
I'll show them all!

Tony screwed them all!

He's a lier!

Shut up!

Stop it!

Somebody stop him!
- He's a monster! - Stop him!

Get off me, Valentina!

No, no...

No good...

Get off me!

Get off...!

Anton! Anton, are you alright?



Val, help me!

Don't loose my hands!

I'm sorry!
- I know! I know!

Val, I love you!

For whom did you work, eh?

You didn't come up by yourself...

Someone's got at you.
Someone's paid you!!!

Speak a little Russian do we!?


There you are!

This is all your fault!

Come to everything
we've been through!

How could you?
Is this how you pay men?

I can't believe it!
You did everything!

This is all your doing!
- All my doing...?

No, no...I'm felicity

I'm the felicititater...
the facilititatater, dear boy.

I create the opportunities

It's not my fault if
your not up to it.

Ah, forgive me!



Wake up!

Dad! Wake up.

Step up. Step up!

He's mortal drunk.

P-p-lease m-mis-s,

there's-s n-nothing
y-you c-can d-d-o,

h-he's d-d-dead...
- NOOO!!

H-he's d-dead drunk.

Have you ever seen
this guy before?

All look the same.
- Ah, bloody drunk.

I hate you!

This is my choice!!

Now, there's absolutely
no need for that.

That's just plain

You think you deserve
punishment, don't you?

You have no idea.

You're just a kid.

Where have you been?
I'm a woman now.

Swlfish bitch!

I only fit the... - Only fit for hell.

If only.

That stubborn Parny
would never forgive me.

And that'd be a shame.

Let's dance.


I've won.

You know, it's...not exactly
what I had in mind.

...all this.

Valentina, being the fifth...

She's supposed to be the prize

not part of the score...

That's not fair.

I hope they get that bastard.
Tear him limb from limb...

But they won't.

He leads a charmed life,
that one...

I've been trying to nail
that bastard for years...

But, there's always some prat

who seems to come
often to his rescue...

You know those weird markings
on his forehead found on him?

What is it all about?

Maybe protect him?

I've never been into
that black-magic stuff myself...

Come on, I offer you a stick
gum or breath mint.

Ah, I hate to see you like this.

I tell you what...

If you can get the lowdown
on those satanic markings,...

no, better -  if you melt me that
selfrighteous little prick

off the face of the universe...
I'll give you Valentina back.

What do you say?

Thanks God for that!

Give me!

I'm in little bit hurry.
- Give us a second, please.

Here's your tube...
An here's mine.

But mine's just a cheap
counterfeit - it breaks... easily.

Oh, here's another...

- You're not amused?

You've been talking to the devil,
haven't you?

I want to be saved...Wait not me...

If you manage to kill me, then
he'll release Valentina.

Am I right? It's all a lies.
He can't release her...

He can't release her,
because doesn't have her.

He doesn't have her,
because she's the prize.

Alright. He still doesn't
have five wins.

But if you kill me he will,
won't he?

And then, Doc, lose beautiful
Valentina forever.

Choose. - This is ridiculous!
- Choose!


That one. - You sure you
made the right choice?

Oh, look.
- Let's find out.

There! Gotcha!

Thanks you all for comming.
That was splending success!


There are three cardinal rules.

Truss to the neck...

One, there's no black-magic,
only cheap tricks.

And...I forget the others.
Now, where's my daughter?

Oh for Christ sake.
How should I know?

You're her father.
You're loving father.

I mean, she's free too.

Three years, ...

The winds still blow.

The snows still fall.

Fires still burn.

Yet...everything has changed.

Except, my panishment.

Am I ever to find her?


No more choices.

No more choices...

So, you found her?

Yes. Yes, I found her.

I think...she may have the daughter.

You're not going in there, are you?

You wouldn't want to frighten
her..scar a child for life..

Look at you.


The great  Doctor Parnassus...

You're an utter disgrace!

This is going to take time.
- Oh, Percy...

What would I do without you?

Get a midget.
- Get a midget.

Let Doctor Parnassus opens
you imagination

Transcend the heights on Beauty's wing.

Let be transported you to worlds
you've never dreamt of...

Does it come with a happy ending?

Sorry, can't guarantee that.


Oh, bless you, sir.

Get back to work!

Special thanks to SergeiK.