Firehouse Dog Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Firehouse Dog script is here for all you fans of the Josh Hutcherson movie. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Firehouse Dog quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.

Firehouse Dog Script

SHANE: Stars.

From a distance,
they seem so mysterious,

so powerful, so perfect.

You'd never guess they're
reallyjust big, bloated balls

ofhot, smelly gas.

Unless, by some
freaky twist of fate,

you got close to one, like I did.

Because the star
I'm talking about is...

an actor,
an actor living in paradise.

So rich, so pampered,
so out of touch,

he forgot what real life was like.

- MAN: Waiting on talent!
- WOMAN: Waiting on talent!

- Or maybe, he never really knew.
- MAN #2: Waiting on talent!

Hey, Liz, what's up?

Time is up, Trey.

Is he coming out or not?

It's not looking good.

I mean, he's really depressed.


Come in.

But park the negativity

and I'll show you why.


A fleece?

A black-and-white spotted fleece?

I mean, one of your P.A. S
was wearing this.

So what?

It reminds him

of the girl that broke
his heart is so what.

And now he's in there, and he
can't think of anything else.

Trey, the director's furious.

The weather's getting dicey,

and the plane's been sitting
on the runway idling for hours.

It's his last skydiving shot, Trey.

There must be something
that I can do.



All he sees is Lola.

LIZ: This is crazy, Trey.

He has to work.

Then you tell him.


we are talking about your legacy.

- (whimpers)
- That's right.

Your legacy.

Compared to you,
that Taco Bell dog

is just a footnote in history.

I had no idea that bugged him.

Let's get his tuxedo
and his props on.


Let's shoot this thing, buddy.

Secret Agent
Dewey Branson

is ready for action.

- (barking)
- Liz...

you're a miracle worker.

Thank you.

- MAN (over radio): "A" camera's set.
- WOMAN: "B" camera's good to go.

MAN 2:
"C" and "D" cameras are ready.

SHANE: But sometimes miracles...

- MAN 3: Copy that.
...can turn into nightmares., take one, we have feed.

Oh, my God!

What happened?!

It's not my fault!

The lightning popped the chute
before I could strap it on!

Liz... Liz...

i-i-it's his.

We're close. We're close.

You guys look over there by that hill.

We have to keep looking.

LIZ: Trey...

Trey, his hairpiece
could have landed

miles away from...
from the rest of him.

There are lakes and rivers
all over this place.


I'm sorry.

I was supposed to take care of him.

I suck.

I suck.

- (sobbing): I suck.
- No.

(sobbing): I suck. I suck!!

You don't suck.

Maybe the lesson is;

sometimes, to get
to real paradise,

you need to take a road
so dark, there are no stars.

MAN: Help!

Help me!

I can't get out!

Is anyone there?

Help me! Shane!

Shane, you're drooling.

Dude, you are freaking out.

What's up with you?

I didn't get any sleep
at all last night.

I was playing Alien Siege
for 11 straight hours.

Oh, you're so lucky your old man
pulls 24-hour shifts, dude.

What level did you get up to?

Uh, 13. I was blazing.

J. J: You're such a liar.

There's no level higher than nine.

Not for you,J.J.

Obviously, you didn't
see the black hole.


So, Shane, if you were
gaming all night,

I guess you're not worried
about the science test.

See you there.

Arlo took it first period.

He said it was brutal.

Aw, man, I'm doomed.

And I'm way doomed.

Hey, guys,

I'm just gonna hit
the head real quick.

TEACHER: Keep your books closed.

You may not refer to your notes.

Do not look at anyone else's test.

Please be sure to put your name
in the top left-hand corner.

And read through in its entirety.


How's it going, Shane?

Don't you guys have
a fire to put out?

Picking up filters for the rig.

So, what, you ditching school today?

Uh, hello? Holiday.

Malcolm X's birthday.

Malcolm X's birthday.

Is that today?

Yeah, Malcolm X Day.

Right... on.

SHANE: Hey, I'm gonna roll.

I'll see you guys later.

Hey, you want to hitch with us?

No, I'm cool.

I'm just gonna clear my head.

Hey, don't be
getting yourself

into any trouble today!

Thanks, Lionel,
I already have a dad!

You'd better call the cap.

Joe! Get the phone!

You get it!

You get it!

I'm making lunch!

WOMAN: You're closer, okay?!

MAN: Cap!

Pep won't answer the phone!

Since you guys are so busy...

Engine 55. Connor...

Uh, Captain Fahey speaking.

LIONEL: Heads up, Cap.

We just saw Shane on Fulton Avenue.


Like, now, maybe 30 seconds ago.

Hey, ask him if today's Malcolm X's birthday.

Bring him in.

LIONEL: Okay, Cap, we're on it.

And, uh, and maybe pick up lunch.

I hate to bring him in today.

Shut your yap.

Oh, yeah.

You're mine.

All try...

all fail.

Oh, yeah.

That's right.

End of the line, mutt.

Ugh! Mouth fart.


If you're gonna ditch,

you're gonna get caught, Shane.

What do you got to say
for yourself, huh?

I hate that dog.

You're my favorite star.

I have a question-
Rexxx, over here.

Tell us, Rexxx, who are you wearing?

Rexxx, a few words for your fans.

Incident 205-0.

Be advised.

South Harbor 
is off-line until further notice.

Cap's waiting for you
in the locker room.

And he is seriously angry.

Yeah, what else is new?

I guess you'll find out
when you get punished.

Hey, dude, just do what I do.

The second he opens his mouth,
start crying.

Or better yet, tell
him it's in your DNA.

That means everything
horrible you do is his fault.

Joe, how do I play this one?


You get in there,

look him in the eye,
and say you're sorry.


Give him a break, Joe.

Kid's mom split
when he was, like, two.

He's an orphan.

He's not an orphan.

He's got a dad.

Yeah, so no mom

and a firefighter dad.

Pretty much makes him an orphan.

- Right.
- Well, he's got us.

Hope he finds a good shrink.


How many times did I
warn you about ditching?

Three? Four?

That's, um, that's my PSP, Dad.

Can I have it back?

You know, it doesn't seem
to matter what I say.

So I'm gonna hit you where it hurts.

- No PSP,
- What?!

No PlayStation,

Come on, Dad, don't do this to me. iPod.

Dad, come on.

You know, nothing else
seems to work with you.

Engine 55, Engine 24...

I don't know what to do, Shane.

- Ladder 33, respond.
- Come on.

Hamilton Avenue, structure fire.

You took my helmet again.

This is definitely mine.

Then why's my name on it?


Hey, come on, guys.

Suit up is
supposed to take one minute,

- no more.
- DRIvER: Let's go, Dogpatch!

(over radio):
South Side's getting hot, Captain.

WOMAN: Copy that.

Check the extremities,
then set up for a ground deluge.

Roger that.

What's the status inside, Burke?

Secondary search complete, Captain.

It's all clear inside.

All right, lose the masks
and position all crews

for exterior attack.

No rescues for you today, Sparky.

Entry Control,

secondary search is complete.

Let's lock up that building-
no one else goes in.


Stay in the rig, Shane.

Looks like Greenpoint's first on the scene.

- Again?
- And we're last.


Hey, Jess.

Last four in a row, Dogpatch.

Looks like you're
buying the ice cream.

- Yeah, where do you want us?
- Stand by.

We'll see where we need you.

And don't trip over my hoses.

Yes, sir.

All right, boys, surround and drown.

We're standing by.


- Standing by again.
- Beautiful.

Dad, look!

55, life net!

McBride, double-time me to the roof.

Come on, guys, step it up!

Let's do this.

Ready and... lift!

Hang on, boy.

Just hang on.

(grunts) No!

Hang on, bud. Hang on.

Okay, let's move.

Firefighter down.

Dogpatch, where's that life net?

- Let's move it!
- Let's go!

Need another man.

- Let's move. Let's move this.
- I'm on it!


Hang on, we're coming, Cap!


- snap it up!
- Hustle, guys, come on, move it.

Focus, guys, we're almost there.

That's it. That's it.

Hang on, Cap.


To the right!


- (all gasping)
- Huh?

Come on, mutt.

Let's get him some oxygen.

Dad, you okay?

Yeah. Come on.

- Cap, you all right?
- I'm okay.

I'm fine.
How's the dog?

Smells like
rotten tomatoes,

but he'll live.

SHANE: Oh, no.

Not you.

CONNOR: You know this dog?

Yeah, it's the mutt from hell.

PEP: "Dew."

He's got a name but no
address, no phone number.

I'll call Animal Control.

No, we'll handle it.

So much for standing by,
huh, Connor?

All right, 55,

we got hot spots on the South Side.

Let's hustle.

(softly): Yes!

Back in the game.

All right, put the dog
in the rig, all right?


Yeah, you.

All right, Joe.
Come on, you got it.

Hey, Zach.

Hey, Cap, we got company.

Hey, Zach.

Hey, Connor.

- Welcome back.
- Oh, thanks.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- It's good to see you, man.
- Yeah, you, too.

I guess I haven't
seen you since, uh...

SHANE: Uncle Marc's memorial.

Yeah, it's...
too long.

I've been meaning
to come around, but...

You gonna stay for dinner?

Who's cooking this week?


- I made plenty.
- How's it going, Joe?

I, uh... I better not.

I'm a little pressed for time.

Can we talk?

Yeah. Hey, Pep.

You want to get back
into that engine?

We just... We cannot
be late on another call.

I'm on it.

Hey, guys, clean up that
gear, get the truck ready.

Shane, you're still on dog duty.

Dog duty.

What? He said it.

Dog duty?

Shane, grab my tools, okay?


Come on, mutt.

Fine, suit yourself.

(distorted): Hey!


Yo, Shane!
Today, little bro.

Yeah, I'm coming.

Hey, Terence, let's get these hoses cleaned up.

ZACH: How's Shane doing?

Oh, wish I knew.

Doesn't talk
to me anymore,

you know, unless it's
some half-baked lie

or lame excuse.

Just, since Marc died, it's just...

I think he's just
having trouble moving on.

And what about you?

I'm fine.

These the suspect fires
you were talking about?

Yeah... Yeah, thanks
for sending out

those incident reports; I know
it wasn't exactly protocol.

(chuckles) No, it wasn't.

They add up to anything?

No, well, not yet, but I think...

I think there might be a fire bug.


the department has experts
who handle this kind of thing.

And last I looked,
the captain's office

is over there.

Yeah, well, I like sitting out here.

It keeps me close to the guys.

Okay, so, Joe's cooking

didn't bring you
down here-what's up?

After the mill fire,

everybody from
the mayor on down

was counting on you
to fill Marc's shoes.

Now, we all expected
a period of adjustment.

Your brother
was one hell

of a fire captain.

Those were big shoes to fill,
and we knew that.

But these last couple of months...

Downtown is worried

that this house isn't moving
in the right direction.

What are you looking at?

Not a word out of you, mutt.

Who's that guy?

City manager.

But he's okay.
He was one of us.

Which is exactly why they
sent him to spank us.

Every time
I make a supply request,

it comes back with
a big red X on it.

Budget cuts are hitting
everybody hard.

Look, I'm sorry,

but the city council
is advising the mayor

to shut down Dogpatch.

If it happens,
your territory

will be absorbed by Shoreline
Station and Greenpoint.

Grub's on! Meat stew.

Wash up! Let's go!

You hear me?!

Get a move on!
It's meat stew!

I hate it when he says
"meat stew" like that.

Why doesn't he just
tell us what's in it?

It's meat.

More like mystery meat.

Yeah, but it's starting to
taste more and more like...

Dog, you just read my mind.

Hey, what are you doing?!
If you don't...

Dog, if you don't get off
that table, I'm gonna...

Whoa. Is that thing rabid?

No. Easy, Zach.
He hasn't bitten anybody.

- (barking)
- LIONEL: Come on, Terence, grab him!

- Yet.
- I got him!

No, not his tail!

JOE: Terence, you nitwit!

- (dishes crashing)
- You stay.

- There he goes!
- Come on, cut him off!

- Lock him in the engine room.
- Cut him off!

Can't you just buy us some time?

I mean, come on, Zach.

You owe us that.

I'll see what I can do.

I told you...
I told you to watch him.

I did. L-I was.


...going to.
- Right. Okay, take him home.

Make up a "found dog" flyer,

and I want it posted
first thing in the morning.

You got that?


Nice, huh?

Enjoy it while it lasts.

What's the matter with you?

Hey! Where are you going?!


Are you crazy?! Get back here.


What is your problem?


You are one strange dog.

Come on, mutt, look at me.

Stop moving. Hold still.



No... no...


What are you doing?

No, no, everything has a place.

This is my house!

This is my room.

- Stop.
- (fabric tearing)

You're ripping it.

Let go!

This is my house.

And this is my bed.

Night, mutt.

You're probably not even lost.

They probably kicked your
crusty butt to the curb!


Sleep well, fur ball, 'cause
tomorrow you're out of here.

JOE: Come on, rookie.

My grandmother can lay hose
straighter than that.

Yeah, she can also
bench press 350 pounds.

Hey, Shane!

PEP: What's up, Shane?

How's it?

Keep it straight!
Keep it straight!

Okay, Captain, try it now.


This thing's a rat's nest.

Flyers are done.

Need the stapler.

Yeah, okay, well, take it easy.

We're running short
on just about everything.



He's not very friendly
for a dog, is he?

You don't know the half of it.

(on Tv): This is Felicity Hammer
bringing you tragic news.

After a massive manhunt,

the search for missing superstar
Rexxx... has been called off.

- Tragically, the number one
- (curious whimper)

Box office champ of
such films as Jurassic Bark

and its sequels

had just launched
his own pet perfume line.

The perfume, redolent of bacon,

squirrel and butt crack,

had taken the luxury
pet industry by storm.

Rexxx's lifetime companion,
manager Trey Falcon,

was unavailable for comment,
but inside sources

- report he has scheduled
- (barking)

A private memorial service
for later this month.

Next up, Cher turns 60?

(chuckles) Stay tuned.

(in distance): How 'bout now?!

Uh... no.

Are all these red pins arson fires?

No, not officially.

According to the city.

But... that's the textile mill.


You think the fire that killed
Uncle Marc was set on purpose?

I don't know, um...

I mean, you see
the same flashover

and burn patterns again and again...

Uh... I don't know.

Maybe I could help.

You know, Shane, Shane...

don't worry about it;
it's just a theory.

Now, if you really
want to help,

you could find Dewey's owner, okay?



No, stop!

If you don't stay in one place,
I can't get rid of you.


Sit... stay, whatever
it takes to leave me alone.

Look out!

What are you, some kind
of freak-show circus dog?


what else you got?


Mikey, Max,
if you don't leave

your daddy alone, I'm gonna...

Works every time.

I heard that, Joe.

Max, stop biting your little brother.


- (applause)
- All right, everybody, let's give it up

for Falstaff from
Shoreline Company C,

who's leaving his mark
on this course.

And while our volunteers
clean that up,

I want to bring up
the man whose company

has underwritten
this entire day for us.

Please give it up
for Mr. Corbin Sellars.

Thank you, Zach.

Don't applaud me.

I should be applauding you.

SELLARS (in distance): Honestly...

Went down pretty hard in that
ladder climb competition.

Good thing you landed on your head.

(chuckling): Yeah.

(all laughing)


You know, when I was a pro ball player,

my coach had a quote
that he used before every game.

"It's not what lies before us..."

You know, I bet your brother's
looking down today and smiling.

- "It's what lies within us."
- Yep.

Yeah, nothing made Marc happier
than kicking Greenpoint's butt.

...all of you today...

But you didn't

come here to listen to some
old quarterback yammer.

So, next up... we have
Sparky of Greenpoint,

as he's handled by
Jasmine "J.J." Presley,

daughter of illustrious
Fire Captain Jessie Presley.

- Here we go.
- Come on,J.J.


Somebody should test
that dog for steroids.

And Sparky completes the course
in a record time of 44 seconds,

eclipsing the record set
last year

by Blue of Dogpatch Station.

Let's give him a hand,
ladies and gentlemen.

Aw, man!

Nice job,J.J.

That was awesome!

Let's get out of here, Captain.

Our, uh, our final competitor
is Dogpatch's own Dewey,

handled by Shane Fahey,

son of Captain Connor Fahey.


And the "mutt from hell"?

What? Come on.

What is that?

That all you got?

- Oh, come on!
- Nice mutt!

- Yeah!
- Dogpatch, you gotta be kidding me.

- Whoo!
- His legs are too short.

GI RL: No chance!

Go on, Dewey.

Hey, don't trip, Fahey.

- Let's go, Dewey!
- Let's go, Dewey!

- Come on, Dewey!
- WOMAN: You call that a dog?

MAN: That dog's a mutt!

All right, all right!

Go, Dewey, yeah!

Dewey is beating Sparky's split
time by a full three seconds.

Oh, yeah, now what?!

Huh? Now what?

All right!

Hold on, hold on.
Dewey's stopped right before

- the final obstacle.
- Dewey, what's wrong?

Dewey, jump!


(echoing): Dewey? Dewey?

Get over it, dude.

She's not the only
babe on the beach.

SHANE: Dewey!

Game over, folks.

- Sparky and J.J. Presley win the dog challenge.
- No!


WOMAN: Yes! Yes!

MAN: How did that happen?

Oh, I'm so proud of you.


BURR: Hey, yo, Dog Pound.

Hey, Connor.

Got some news about
your firehouse dog.

He's afraid of fire.

Last place- the mutt's
perfect for you guys.

Way to go, losers.

That was so... awesome.

Just the look on their faces
when they

thought they were gonna lose!

Yeah, watching them sweat,

it's the best thing
I've seen in months.

Come on, let's get out of here.

Go on, rub it in.

I just wanted to say that...

the better dog lost.

Come on.

At the 40, the 30, he may go all the way!

He's at the 20, the 10...

Hey, where you been?

- Touchdown!
- (cheering)

Just out walking,
shaking off the loss.

Hey, sit down with your old man.

Watch some football,
like the old days.


- (chuckles)
- What?

I was just thinking, I...
It's been a long time

since I've seen my guys that happy.

He could've won, Dad.

Yeah, he should've won.

...all the way to the end zone.

Incredible play for the Bulldogs.

So, I saw you talking to

Jessie's little girl at the picnic.

What's the deal with you and her?

Dad, she's Greenpoint.

Just... I'm just asking.
Forget I mentioned it.

You have any luck on
the flyers you put up?

No, not yet.

Okay, well, give it time.
Somebody's gonna call.

- Dad...
- Mm-hmm?

L-I was thinking...

what if nobody calls?

Maybe he could
stick around for awhile.

M-Maybe Dogpatch
needs another mascot.

No, Dogpatch is living
on borrowed time.

There's not much point
in a mascot now.

Well, l-I could
take care of him

and you wouldn't have
to deal with him at all.

You really want to be
responsible for this dog?

Yeah, I do.

Okay, you wanted to be
responsible for the dog, you got it.

- But...
- Shane.

(sighs) Let's get a mop.

What the?!

Dog, if you messed up my room...


I'm sharing my cell
with Martha Stewart.

Sorry, fleabag, not tonight.

You need to learn
some healthy boundaries.

And you better not snore.

You're such a jerk.


That Tv is my personal property.

And no, I don't have a receipt.

Who's that?

Bean counter.
Sent by the city.

Pretty soon, everything
in here'll be shipped off

to stations all over
the city, including us.

But they can't split you guys up.

Yeah, they can!
And they will.

Not much of the old
neighborhood left anyway.

Everything's been all
boarded up and sold off.

Guess there's
some things

even a fireman can't save.

Remember what I told
you, now- no lunch

till you get that
engine room mopped up.

Good to know.


nobody's supposed to be in here.

Couple of weeks, nobody will be.

Engine 55, Engine Eight, Engine 33...

Come on, Terence, we got to roll.

Ladder 24, Ladder 36, Rescue Seven respond.

How many times
have I told you-

wait till my feet
hit the floor first!

Come on, you lovebirds,
get the lead out!

Let me go first next time.

What do you think this is,
clown school?!

They wouldn't let you
in the police department.

- LIONEL: Me first, then you.
- Guys...

check out the dog.

Shane, get over here.

CONNOR: Get the dog off the rig.

He's not a mascot.

Don't let him out of your sight.

Dewey, down!

What's the matter with you?


Coming in right now.

That's right, get 'em behind the barricade!

MAN: We need these people back.

WOMAN: Okay.

MAN: Need a medic.

Okay, take it easy.
You're gonna be fine.

Get those people off the bridge!

We have folks down there
trying to do a job.

WOMAN: I need to get through.

Okay, everybody here
behind the barricade.

Hey, guy... I need you to step
away from the rail, please.

Everybody follow me-
Look at me, please, sir.

Back behind the barricade.

Here you go, buddy.

CONNOR: Hey, Burr?

What's the size-up?

Retrofitters breached the
interior support,

so the ceiling's coming down
pretty fast.

Got the workers out just in time.

Where does Jessie want us?

My money's on broom detail.

MAN: All clear. Let's lock it up.

Easy, buddy, nice and easy.

MAN: Nobody else goes in.

Burr, where's Captain Presley?

Just look for the red helmet.

No, Burr...

Where's Jessie?

Engine 24 captain unaccounted for.

55 to Dispatch, we're
initiating a primary search.

Dewey? Dewey?

Dewey, get over here.


Dewey, get over here.


What's the matter with you?

Burr, how many points of access?

Just the one. Cave-in
blocked the south ent...

Get-Get back.

Everybody back!

Look out!

This whole place is coming down.

Captain, what do we do?

LfJessie's still in
there, we're gonna get her.

- Okay, let's do it.
- Pull everybody back.

- We're not leaving her...
- You're staying put.


That's an order, Burr.

Joe, keep the medic close and ready-
I'll be on channel one.

We're coming with you, Captain.

Thanks, but no.

Uh, Dispatch, I need a dedicated
channel for search and rescue.

Roger that, 24, you're clear on channel three.

Jessie, do you copy?

Jessie, do you copy?

(muffled): Jessie!




Joe, where's my dad?

Shane! Stay back.

He'll be fine.

Be careful.

Come on!

Get out of here, dog!

I said get out of...



Do you copy?

Guys, look!



- Good job, Cap.
- (laughing)

MAN: I am ready to go home.



We were worried about you in there.

J ESSI E (chuckles):
Another day at the office.

All right, Jess, you take care of yourself.

- We'll all be checking in.
- Thanks.

- I'll see you soon.
- Okay.

You betcha.

Excuse me, is that

that dog who saved the day?

Yeah, it is.

Who does he belong to?

Engine 55.

We're lucky to have him.
His name is Dewey,

and he's the mascot
of Dogpatch Station.

Huh! Well, smile, wonder dog.

You made the news.

And we're back,

at 12 minutes past the hour.

This next one really made my day.

An historic firehouse
in Lincoln County,

which has been slated
for closure later this week

is being credited
with one last lifesaving rescue.

Meet Dewey, mascot of Engine 55

and the hero of yesterday's
tunnel collapse.

Dewey is new to the team,
but as you can see,

he's raring to go.

We spoke with
Captain Connor Fahey

and the brave firefighters
of Engine 
and asked them...

The entertainment industry

honors its own today
at a memorial service

for canine action star Rexxx,
who died tragically last month.

Security is tight,
and emotions are high,

as a veritable who's who
of Hollywood stardom

is in attendance.

- (dogs whining)
- TREY: I had a mantra:

Next year, Rexxx.

Next year we'll nap
by a roaring fire.

(voice breaking):
Next year we'll play Frisbee

under a blue moon.

Next year we'll take that hike
through Joshua Tree.

Well, there is no next year.

And tonight,
there's a bright new star

shining in Heaven.

TREY (crying): I loved my dog.

It's just the way he
would have wanted it,

thanks to you.

- (music stops)
- Cut the water!

Ah, it's the least I could do.

Rexxx always had a flair for drama.

Oh, Trey.

Let me take you to dinner, okay?

I can't... I can't believe he's gone.

Now it's too late for
Rexxx to just be a dog.

DISPATCHER: Engine 55,

Ladder 24, Ladder Eight,

Rescue Nine, respond.

Kessler Parkway, electrical
fire. Power lines down.

Come on, guys!




Move over.


We finally get our act together
just in time to close.

PEP: Yep.

Good old Dogpatch- late as usual.

That's us.

Well, at least we came out swinging, right?

Someone order rocky road?

CONNOR (chuckles):
Is that

a parting gift, Zach?

No, courtesy of Greenpoint.

Told 'em I was coming over here
on business anyway.

I, uh... prefer to give
bad news in person.

You got our reassignments?

Afraid not.

Okay, so what's the bad news?

(sighs): Bad news is...

you're gonna be up all night
unpacking this stuff.

The orders came down
from the mayor himself:

Dogpatch is staying put.

For real?

That furry
little publicity magnet

you've got there saved
this company's rear end.

- (loud laughter)
- Yeah!

- Dewey!
- Yeah!

- That's so solid, man!
- What?!

- (grunts inquisitively)
- Okay!


- Whoa!
- Whoa!

CONNOR: Well, Shane was right.

Maybe all Dogpatch needed
was a good dog.

BOY: Okay, shoot, shoot!

What's up?

What do you think is up?

Mrs. Renzi busted
a pop quiz first period.

- Arlo said it was...
- Yeah.

Brutal. I got it.


Not just brutal.

Way brutal.

Oh, man.

- Can I copy off of you?
- I was gonna copy off of you.

Hey, you copied off me last time.

- That was one answer!
- It was an answer.

You owe me.

See you later, Shane.

GI RL: Where's my lunch money?

As your friends in first period
undoubtedly told you,

there will be a pop quiz today.

This quiz will cover everything
we reviewed last week.

And remember,
any incomplete answers

do count as mistakes.

I see a lot of gum chewing.

Please visit the wastebasket
immediately if that is the case.

Thank you.

Hey, Joe, check this out.

B-plus on my science test.

(chuckles) Hey! I'm impressed.

Did you copy?

No. I studied for
almost one whole night.

Are you...
actually cooking?

- Hey.
- Hey, Shane.

- Where's my dad?
- He's downtown at a meeting, knockin' heads.

Where's his stuff?

In his office.

Sure... make yourself right at home.

What was wrong with his old office?

He's captain- he belongs here.

Look, I know I told you to blame
your DNA for all your problems.

Moving on wasn't easy
for your dad,

but he's finally stepping up...

and maybe you should, too.

Hey... hey, I just got a call
from the Public Affairs Office.

Apparently, the mayor
wants you and Dewey

to appear
at the Firefighters Benefit.

That's cool, huh?


What's going on?

L-I was...

I was just getting you organized.

Wait a minute.
This is... this is my...

Yeah, your wall map.
It beats pushpins.

You... you shouldn't
have done all this.


No, I mean,
you should never have felt

that this was your responsibility.

I know in the past six months
I've really been ragging on you

for just about everything,

and I...

I think the truth is,
I'm the one who's...

been neglecting what's important.

What's that?

It's you.

'Cause you're so smart...

and capable and strong.

And I've been... kind of lost

in all of this
since Marc died, and I...

I think I've turned
into a pretty lousy dad.

I'm sorry.

And thanks for this.

I'm not strong.

I'm weak.

I'm a bad person.

Why would you even...
think something like that?

The day of the mill fire...

I was at school.

The trucks drove by.


(laughing): There he is.


Then JJ. Called her mom.

She said a firefighter was missing.

I ran back to the fire station
as fast as I could.

When I got there,
nobody would look at me.

(crying): NotJoe...

not Lionel...

not Pep.

That's when I was sure
you were dead.

I loved Uncle Marc.

But when I found out it was him...

I was happy.

I was happy 'cause it wasn't you.

We're gonna be okay.

Thank you.

Okay, we've just got the tally.

Now, this "little reception"
has raised over $100,
for our firefighters.

How 'bout that, huh?

Yes, give yourself a round of
applause and while you're at it,

how about something
for our honored guests

from Dogpatch Station, Engine 55?

Now maybe we can squeeze
a new battery out of the department.

Thanks for pleading
our cause with the mayor.

Hey, don't thank me;
thank Super Mutt.

Hey, where's Pep?
She's gonna miss all this.

I don't know.
I'll try her again.

Here she comes, and she
is way out of uniform.

Since when are you a girl?

Stop staring.

You'll burn holes.

Okay, seriously, let's
get to the real reason

we're here tonight.

This little pooch has
been on CNN, Fox News

and all five local news channels.

We're on!

Please welcome
the pride of Engine 55,

Dewey the Wonder Dog
and his boy, Shane Fahey.

Go, Shane!

Now, Shane is 12 years old.

Dewey is an undetermined age,
just like me.

Anyhow, have fun.

SHANE: Thanks, Mr. Sellars.

Hey, everybody.

So, before I get to
the more radical stunts,

let's start with something simple.

I need a volunteer, first of all.

How about you, Mr. Sellars?

Do you have a, uh, a watch

or a wallet or something
you carry on you?

I'm gonna get this back, right?

We hope.

All right.

See, all right?

All right, no peeking.

So, the next step is
to hide the watch.


Hide it good, now, Captain.

Being a firehouse mascot isn't all just for show.

It's a real job
that requires real skills.

Search and rescue
requires something more.

All right, Dewey... find it.

Go ahead.

Dewey's sense of smell

is 10,000 times more powerful
than a human's.

That, combined with the ability
for him to think on his paws,

makes him an invaluable

search and rescue dog.

He can remember a scent
for weeks, even months,

and recognize it
from a great distance.

It really is you.

Oh, I missed you, too.

I missed you so much.

I don't know how,
and I don't care,

but you found my dog.

I was so bumming,

and then I saw his
picture in the paper,

and dudes, I couldn't believe it.

This dog is not an actor.

Oh, yeah, you must
have seen him

in The Fast and the Furriest.

Dudes, come on,
that's a Rexxx classic.

His name's not
even Rexxx; it's Dewey.

It says so on his tag.

No, see, that was the prop tag
he was wearing when he got lost.

Our dog is not a movie star,
he's not a celebrity.

He's a... he's a mutt.

I mean, we-we practically
found him on the street.

Yeah, well, see...

he looks different in
these production stills

because his trademark
hairdo is, uh...

it's a hairpiece.

That's my boy.

I mean, come on, you must've
noticed how special he was.

Uh, look, Mr. Falcon,
I mean, I can appreciate

what you must have gone
through, but this, uh...

this dog means a lot
to our engine company,

a lot to the city...

and particularly to my son.

Now, if there's any way

that we can compensate you, uh...

If you're asking me
to put a price on family...

I can't.

It's time for Rexxx to come home.

You can't take him away.

(sighs) Well, Shane...

Dad, do something.


it's his dog.

I know this doesn't
mean much to you

right now, but... thanks
for taking care of him.

Well, you got it wrong.

He was the one taking care of us.

Get out of here, then.

Just go.

Take him.

I'm sorry.

He was a pain in the butt, anyway.

Well, I was going to say
something wise and fatherly,

but the truth is, this just sucks.

Cap, we got an EMS call.

- (horns honking)
- JOE: Fire Department!

MAN: Hey!

- Come on, let's go.
- Wait!

PEP: Hold up.

All right, let's find you a ride home.

Brought my skateboard.

- Shane, I'll find you a ride home.
- Just leave me alone.

Well, I'll see you at home.

Steve, let's clear off these centerpieces...


And, hey, I'm sorry about your dog.

Can I buy you another one?

Another dog?

Just think about it, okay?

SELLARS: Do you have a problem?

I realize that, but
there's nothing I can do.

What is the holdup?

More activity in
that area right now

is sure to draw attention.

And I'm not just talking
about Connor Fahey.

I have finally put
a city council in place

that will approve a sports complex.

I want that final property in ashes.

Do it tonight.

Tonight?! How am I gonna do that?

(chuckles) You're a fireman.

Figure it out.
Light a match!

(mutters): Son of a...


- (Shane gasps)

Don't you tell me I'm impatient.

I have waited long enough.

No more excuses.
Call me when it's done.

Dad was right.

Ah, welcome to the Neu Hotel.

Please, come, come, come.

And if you need anything,

please do not hesitate to... ask.


Hey, Rexxx, it's good

to have you back, buddy.

Dude, what were they
feeding you, kibble?

This is so unreal, Trey.

Oh, I'm telling you...
Deep down in my gut, I knew

it was gonna take more than
some nosedive to stop Rexxx.

- Right, buddy?
- (growls)

Eat up; you need your energy.

So, what are you
guys gonna do first?

- Mmm...
- Huh? Tell me.

First, a press conference.

Yeah, I got the campaign
all figured out.

How about this?

Rexxx- the Resurrection.


Okay, a little esoteric.

Yeah. What about?

What about all those things
you said at the memorial? Huh?

The playing Frisbee, hiking,
treating him like a real dog?



Listen, I know Rexxx, okay?

He doesn't want to be a real dog.

He wants to be a star.

He's dying to jump back
into action, right, boy?


and speaking of that, I got
a little surprise for you.

Some old friends, you know.

Chill, dude.

It's just a couple of sirens.

Get your head in the game, man.

I mean, come on, buddy,
the betties are waiting.


- What was that?
- Where'd he come from?!

Hey, guys, look!

You're not gonna believe this, Cap.

- Hey, come on, boy.
- That's my Dewey!

Go, go, go!

You can jump! Go!

Hey, look who's back!

- All right!
- Yeah!

Actually, Joe, I do believe it.

MAN (on Tv):
I will not hesitate to kill you.




Come on.

Come on, pick up.

(recorded): This is Connor Fahey.

You're reached my cell phone.

Leave a message
and I'll get back to you.

"Engine 55."

"Harbor Fire"?

That's everything, Cap.

...Pier 29, barge fire...

Come on, Joe, you got to give me a little more.

I don't know what this junk is,
but it's getting hot fast.

I hear you, Cap, but no can do.

I'm maxing you out on
the one that I have.

Roger that.
Maintaining deluge.

- All right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Everybody all right?
- Yeah, we're good, Cap. Yeah.


Clear up, watch those pumps.

We're on it.

Good eye, Dewey.

Looks like I owe you an apology.

For what?

Your mascot.

He isn't afraid of fire.

He isn't afraid of anything.

- NEWSCASTER: At this moment,
- (phone rings)

There are no indications
that anything toxic...

- Hello?
- SHANE:J.J., my dad was right- I have to tell him.

Wait, wait, Shane, slow down.
What's going on?

No, no, listen.
L-Is your mom there?

I can't get ahold of my dad.

She's at the harbor.

There's a monster blaze down there.

I know, I think it's arson.
I think they set it on purpose.

What do you mean? Who?

Corbin Sellars...
and some other guy.

I heard 'em talking about
burning down buildings

to make way for a stadium.

They want to buy up all the land.

But wait a second.

Why would they set fire
to the garbage barge?

It's not even land.

Okay, that's true.

Hang on.

Joe told me the whole
neighborhood's been boarded up

or sold off, except for...

Except for what?

Parts that have been burned down.

And the firehouse.

Shane, what are you getting at?

J.J., the barge is a decoy.

The real target is here.
L-It's Dogpatch.

I think there's someone upstairs.

Shane, you got to leave now.




Phew. Ow...



what are you doing here?

You set the fire
that killed my uncle.

He died in the line of duty.

No, you did it.

Hey, come on.

Put that down.

My dad trusted you, and you lied.

Why'd you do it?
To build a football stadium

for Corbin Sellars?

Shane, you're having trouble
separating fact from fiction.

Put that down and we'll
talk about this outside.

I'll put it down
as soon as the cops get here,

which will be any second now.

You're lying.


Okay, guys, keep it
on those hot spots.

What's wrong, boy?

Connor, it's my daughter.

You should hear this for yourself.

Hi,J.J., go ahead.



Can you hear me?!



- (barking)
- Whoa!

All-all right, all right.

You're... Nice doggy.

You're a nice doggy.
All right, stay back, now.

Go, go.

- Nice mutt. I...
- (barking)



Come on...


Let's get out of here.

Whoa, whoa!

Watch out, Cap!

Good job, rook.

Come on.

Come on, Dewey.

Come on!

All the doors are locked!
There's no way in!

- Guys, the roof's gonna go!
- Quiet! Quiet! Quiet!

He's with Shane.
He's found Shane!



JOE: It's no good!
It's not working!

(grunting) Stand back!

Engine 55 to Dispatch.

We have a fire in our engine house.

Persons believed inside.

Hold up! Hold up!

I'm coming out!


Where's Shane?

I don't know.

The place was in flames
when I got here.

I thought I heard
someone inside,

but I couldn't find him.

I tried.

I really tried.

Get him some oxygen.

Don't let him leave.

Let's hit that fire.

CONNOR: Shane!

Dad! I'm in here!


Are you all right?

Dad, it's hard to breathe!

Get back and stay low.

Come on!

Wait. Dad!

Dad, give me your ax;
I need to bust the hinges!

If I break the glass,
the fire's gonna flash over.

Trust me.

Stand back.


The top one first.
The top one first.

It won't break!

Lay on it, Shane!

CONNOR: Come on!
You can do it!

Come on!

Got it!


Come on, Dewey, get us out of here.

- (barking)
- Hey, look!

Joe, we got him!

We got to get him some air.

Here, just jump up.


Take it easy.

It's all right.
It's all right.

Where's Zach Hayden?

Just relax.

He set the fires, Dad.

He set all of them.

Even the mill fire.

You were right.


Is it true?
Is it true?

Connor, no one was
supposed to get hurt.

- Cap!
- What about my brother?!

- What about my son?!
- No!

ZACH: It was Corbin Sellars!

He promised!


My bad.

Just give him to the cops.

Come on.
Come on, get up.

- We got one for you, Mac.
- Got it.

MAC: We'll take it from here.


You really kept your cool in there.


Must be my DNA.




Will Rexxx make his Broadway
debut in The Canine Mutiny?

- (cameras clicking)
- Rexxx denies that.

Come on, Trey, throw us a bone here.

Is it true there's
a tape of Rexxx

with Paris Hilton's Chihuahua?

All I can say is

- Rexxx is prepping for
- Hey, Shane.

The most important role of his life.

Cool medal.

Uh, it's okay, I guess.

So, my mom was wondering

if maybe you and your dad wanted
to go to Baskin Robbins with us.




Sure, I think he'd like that.



It's time to say good-bye, chief.

I know your name is Rexxx...

with, like,
a whole lot of X's,

but you'll always be Dewey to me.

I'll come visit you real soon.

I don't think so, Shane.

- Trey...
- You promised him.

I changed my mind.

After being
a real hero,

he'd never be happy
just acting like one.

So long, wonder dog.

I'll come visit you real soon.

Take it easy, rookie!

That's my new bun warmer.

Got it, Joe buddy.

Joe buddy?

Uh, Mr. Joe... buddy.


You got that right.

LIONEL: Oh, my God.

It's the Ark of the Covenant.


This is a fully water-jacketed
900 horsepower-

"we ain't never arriving last
on the scene again."

That's what this is.


I got it.

- Too late.
- I'm closest.

I'm biggest.


Proud home of Engine 55.

May I help you?


Not bad, huh?


- I guess we better go.
- Yep.

Engine 55, Ladder Eight, respond.

Fuller Road near Hightown Mall.

Grass fire.

Be advised, heavy smoke reported.

Caution on approach.

Visibility poor.

What's wrong?

Let's go, Dogpatch!

Suit up 40 seconds!

- (whooping, cheering)
- All right!

- Yes!
- Awesome!

You're one strange dog.

Go get 'em, boy.

Hey, hey!

Looks like we got some backup!

- All right, Dewey!
- Yeah, Dewey!

Dispatch, Engine 55 is en route.

- Yeah!
- Whoo-hoo!

And that's the tale of the dog

who fell from the sky.

He wasn't rich anymore

or powerful or pampered.

But for the first time ever,

he was a real dog.

He was my dog.

Special thanks to SergeiK.