Next Day Air Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Next Day Air script is here for all you fans of the Donald Faison and Mike Epps movie. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Next Day Air quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.

Next Day Air Script

MAN 1: I don't know what the fuck
is going on here.


MAN 2: Shut the fuck up!

MAN 3: Fuck you. Fuck you, that's my shit!

It's in my house.

No, I don't got nothing to do with this shit.
Yo! Why don't we just put the guns down?

LEO: Man, I just deliver packages for a living.
What the fuck am I doing here?

What a day.

MAN 2: Shut the fuck up!


Brain, brain, go away

Come to play another day

Go away, go away


CHITA ON PHONE: 7500 Wissahickon Avenue.
Apartment 303, Philadelphia.

CHITA: You serious?

Phila-del-phia, 19144.

BODEGA: Apartment 303.
You sure about that?

CHITA: Hell, yeah, I'm sure.
I know where I live.

BODEGA: Be sure you're there to sign for it.
CHITA: Don't worry. We'll be here.


Take that.

We gotta a couple of hours to set that off.

You sure you can trust that lady
with this much work?

Right now, I got no choice.
After that loss I took from Carlos...

Speaking of Carlos, I found him.
He's in the car.


CARLOS: Let me out! Fuck, man!

- Look what the fuck he did to my face, man.
- What the fuck?

- You think I give a fuck about your face?
- I don't have it.

Let me tell you what happened.

I wasn't feeling it.
I got the money from Jesús.

I was ready to roll and I go to the airport,
and just when I'm about to get on the plane

the Feds snatched me up and took it.

Look, I swear to God!

I just didn't know how to tell you.
'Cause you're fucking crazy.

I'm supposed to believe the Feds found
$700,000 in your fucking suitcase?

- I'm not lying!
- That's what you want me to believe?

I'm not lying, all right? Fuck.

- Fuck, I'm not lying.
- Do him a favor.

No, Bodega. No!

And in other news, following up on
the story we left you yesterday,

three masked gunmen apparently robbed
the Prestige Bank

on the corner of Broad and Olney.
Early details were sketchy.

However, police now believe
that the would-be robbers

who intended to set it off,
really never set it off at all.

Authorities say that
all of the bank's funds are intact

and the only thing stolen
were the bank's surveillance tapes.

- (SCOFFS) Shit.
- Sandy Carter reporting live

from Center City...

Surveillance tapes? Idiots!

Surveillance tapes? For real?

Surveillance tapes, fuck!

- It ain't my fault.
- What?

You're trying to say it's my fault?
It ain't my fault.

You had us go up in that bank
in the first place.

What? Bro, all I said was...

GUCH: You keep the car running.
We might as well all just go in there.

You know what I'm saying?
It's the three of us.

We're in and we're out. All right?

What's up, man?
Y'all looking at me like that.

- You ready for the money?
- BRODY: Let's do it!

- GUCH: Okay then, let's go!
- I need a gun, dawg! I need a gun.

GUCH: Man, my fault, my fault, my fault.

Yeah, you know what time it is.
Get on the floor, now!

GUCH: Dawg, don't make it a homicide.
Do what the fuck you're told.

GUCH: What you talking? It was perfect.

Turn around.

GUCH: Hassie had the guard.
I had the floor locked down.

Everybody be quiet, don't say shit!

BRODY: Give me these glasses
so I can see that paper.

GUCH: All you had to do was...

Hit the safe.

- Stop right there, Guch.
- What?

I could have sworn I heard you say...

Yo. Get the tapes.

Why would I toss you a trash bag
and ask you to get the tapes? Why?

BROD Y: You rise up in there
like Billy the Kid, with the AK out.

At least I'm thinking
you're gonna hit the drawers.

There better not be no pork in this either.

Come on, come on, give me them tapes.

Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!

GUCH: You're trying to tell me
the whole time you was in the vault

you ain't see no money?

- Brody, come on, man!
- I've got it, Guch. I'm coming.

BROD Y: My adrenalin was running.
I don't remember.

I probably didn't see no money.

Guys, I got it. I got it. Let's go!

GUCH: Yeah, even with the boy's glasses on,
you didn't see no money, right?

That's 'cause you play too much.

- Let's get out.
- Come on. Open the door!

Open the door!

GUCH: What the fuck, man?

Fuck. My bad, yo, my bad.


Come on, let's go! Yo, Brody!

I should've gave it to that fat bastard.
Man, if my shit was working right...

What's wrong with your shit, Guch?

GUCH: I don't know, man.
I think the pin's fucked up or something.

It's like for some reason,
you can pull the trigger one time...

Come on, man.
Stop pointing that gun at me.

Come on, man. I ain't gonna shoot you
with the motherfucking gun.

I know what I'm doing.


I'm saying, you pull this trigger one time,
man, it'll shoot out every bullet in this clip.

BROD Y: Yeah, you could cut
that fat bastard down, for real.

GUCH: Yeah, I'll cut that fat bastard down,

and 10 more motherfuckers
standing behind him, man.

Shit. We're in this bitch now,
we ain't got no damn ride.

- That shit was stolen anyway.
- So what?

You're the only dude I know
ride around in a stolen car for two years

and act like it's yours.

Well, I ain't got time
to be stealing cars every day.

Don't blame me.
Blame your boy right there.

He the one who locked the doors.

Who? That's your boy.

BRODY: That's your boy.
He told me you let him move in here.

GUCH: He said
you told him he could move in.

What? Ask him.

You ask him. You're bitching up about him.
Acting like...

I don't have a problem with it.
I'll ask him right now.

GUCH: It ain't nothing to me, man.

Hassie! Wake up. Yo! Wake up.



(STAMMERING) Like, who said
you could live here?

Y'all did.



HASSIE: Stupid motherfuckers
waking me up. Shit.

That's your boy.

You heard what he just said.
He said y'all. He didn't say me.

I don't even know this dude.

He's crazy.

(GRUNTING) Oh, my God!

IVY: Leo, I saw that.

No, you didn't.

Here. Try not to drop this one. Thank you.


I'm glad you're in a good mood today.
What's up? You're not mad at me no more?

I'm not, but I can't speak for Miss Jackson.

She wants to see you
in her office right now.

- I think that lady told on me.
- What did you do?

She thought I was smoking weed
when I delivered her package.

- You smell like weed right now.
- Say word.

(SCOFFS) See. Look at you.

- Wait. Yo, let me ask you something.
- What?

Who was the dude
that picked you up from work yesterday?

Who, Barton? He's just a friend.

- What did you say his name was?
- Barton.

- Barton?
- Hmm.

His name is Barton?


You fucking him?

Hold up. Excuse you.
Don't worry about who I'm fucking.

We broke up a week ago.

I mean, he's got a nice car
but he ain't got nothing on me.

Look, Leo. I'm sorry, but I'm in love.
So do what you want to do with that.

You should go ahead and quit this job.

I should've never got that bitch this job!
I should have never got...

Leo! Get in here!

- I got a couple more boxes...
- Now! God damn it!

I got a call from a woman yesterday
that said when she answered her door

you were there with a joint in your mouth!

A lady said that about me?

- You know I don't smoke joints.
- Boy, don't get stupid on me.

What? Do you think nobody knows
you smoke around here?

Walking around with them little sticks
in your mouth,

breath stinking about weed.

Ain't nobody stupid around here.
Put your shirt in! Get in.

I don't know what to do with you.
I'm tired of talking.

It's time for you to stop
and take a look at the big picture,

'cause I'm about to fire your ass.

Oh, shit! You're gonna fire me?
Mom! Don't fire me. Please, Mom. I'm sorry.

Yeah, you're always sorry.
Sit your sorry ass down.

But this time I mean it. I'm dead serious.

You will never hear a negative thing
about me ever, ever, ever again, Mom.

Please, I need this job.

Yeah. And I need it, too,
but you're making me look bad.

Please. Please, Mom. I'm your son.

What you gonna do?
You're gonna throw me out on the street?

You're gonna throw your only son
out on the street, Mom? Please?

Mommy. Mommy?

- One more time, you hear me?
- No more times. How about that?

If I get one call about you, you are fired!
Better you than me.

You know, I think that's fair, Mommy.

Don't mommy me. Look at Eric.


Yes, Eric.

Does Eric live at home with his momma?

- No.
- No.

Eric comes in here on time to do his work,
to take care of business.

You're absolutely right, Mom.
And you know what? It's getting late,

so I need to get
these packages out before...

And if I get one call about you, just one...

Mom, you're not gonna get
any more complaints. That's it.

Get out of my office.

- I love you.
- Get out of my office!

- Man, this is some bullshit.
- You scared?

- Who?
- You.

I ain't scared of nobody.

When this motherfucker wake up,
he gotta get the fuck out of here.

You're gonna laugh about it.
You can get the fuck out of here right now.

I'm not going nowhere. I done paid
a couple of bills up in this bitch.

GUCH: Y'all motherfuckers need to learn
how to earn your keep around here.

Hell, yeah, I'm tired of being the only
motherfucker get the jobs around here.

Try to make it so
three motherfuckers could eat.

We can't even pay the rent.

Yeah, we pretty much
done did everything there is...

I mean, if you're running a store,
all you can get is a G?

Then you gotta try to
split that shit three ways.

And, look, I'm sorry. I think my life is worth
more than $300, you know what I'm saying?

I mean,
the way y'all motherfuckers out here now,

we run up on these drug dealers,
it's too dangerous,

- 'cause y'all say my name so much.
- I got it, Guch!

I hear Guch, Guch, Guch, Guch, Guch,
Guch, Guch.

Let's play a game, man. Guch.

Hey, yo, my man. Elevator work?

Well, sometimes.

Ain't this about a bitch?


- Hey, daddy.
- Yeah!

Hey, catch me.


What? What?


You gotta be kidding me.
The elevator works?

Yeah, man, sometimes.


You can't fuck with me.
You can't fuck with me.


I'll punch that little tight-ass T-shirt
off of you.

Who the man now? Who the man now?

Hold that. Yeah. Hold that.



- Go, go, go, go, go.
- I'm on your ass, boy.

I'm on your ass, boy. Hold this.

LEO: Package for Gonzales!

Lazy motherfuckers.


What the fuck you knocking
like the police for, man?

Package for Gonzales.


LEO: It's heavy.

I'm gonna need you to sign.

If you can sign right there, it'll be great.


You know you smell like weed, right?



All right, bro.

No, I got my hands full.


Leo, you get anything today?

- Nope.
- You're sure?


Son of a bitch.


What's up? Nothing?


Maybe it's just late.
It'll probably just come tomorrow.

Yeah. And who the hell
is gonna sign for it tomorrow? Not me.

The Feds are probably all over that shit.

You know, I can't believe
you gave them this address.

You wasn't here. He just called up
and he asked for an address. I didn't know.



"I don't know." That's what you say.

He probably didn't even send it,
and you're here spazzing out for no reason.

I know he did.

He gave me the tracking number
and everything. It's right here.

Call him and have him track it.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't wanna make him nervous.

You track it.

Come on, baby, I need you to do this.


Please. Please. Please.

Oh, yeah. Got you.

- Okay.
- You got me?

Mmm-hmm. Give me the number.
I'll track it for you.

I'm just gonna stay here
in case anything comes.

But as soon as you find out anything
hurry back,

because I need to know what's up.


To track a package, press one.

- Fuck. What the hell are you doing?
- You said track it!

Not from the house phone. Are you crazy?
Go to a pay phone.

Watch who you're talking to, Jesús.
I'm not one of your little flunkies.

- And you're here burning my fucking eggs.
- Do you even know what all this means?

No, Jesús, what does it mean?
What does it mean?

- Our spot is hot because of you.
- Our spot is hot.

How is our spot hot?


We've been caught with shit before.

Not here. And this ain't no small shit
they're gonna let slide.

Mira, this could be the last day of your life.
Fuck those eggs.


- Now, pick it up!
- Fuck you!

All right. Fuck you, Jesús!


Go ahead!

And it's Jesus to you, bitch!

Your mother is the bitch! Okay?

Get the fuck out of here!

I'm a beast!

You refer to me as the champ, boy.


What is this?

I don't know.
Hassie brought that bullshit in here.

GUCH: Hassie!


You see what I'm saying
about this motherfucker?

This is how we gonna end up, man.
Smoke, shit, sleep.


Yeah. What's up with this, though?
You got that knife? Open this.

This motherfucker heavy, man.

Did you order this shit?

GUCH: Shit, what is this?
BRODY: I don't know what the hell that is.

GUCH: Oh! Shit!

What the fuck?


Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Man. Come on, man.

I know... I know this ain't what I think it is.

- Oh, my God.
- Hold on, man.

- I'll be damned. Hold on. Hold on.
- BRODY: Is this what I think it is?


I got to be motherfucking dreaming.

It's gotta be that. Hell, yeah.

- Shit, I can't believe this.
- Is it the thing?

It's the thing?

Is it?


- It is! Holy fuck. Holy. Holy. Holy.
- Yes! Yes! Yes!

- Am I dreaming this?
- Yes.

No, no, no. This is too much like a dream.

- Where did this come from?
- God sent that.

- God, man. What's on the box?
- I don't know.

But, man, this is a blessing, man.
We ain't got no money.


GUCH: This some Cali shit.
BRODY: They sent this shit to us.

Shit. They sent it to us. Now it's mine. Shit.

- Mine, too.
- Wait a minute. Apartment 303?

Oh, shit! Dude, that's them Puerto Rican
dudes across the hall.

We should have been and hit them.
They was getting it like that?

And I want that bitch they got over there.

You know what?
We need to clean this shit up.

God! I can't believe it.
I'm getting a new Escalade.

They're gonna come over here for sure
looking for this shit.

If they do, tell them we took this shit
back to the station.

I'm telling you, I'm selling ounces,
quarter ounces, eight balls, 50s, 20s.

Put the trash in that.
You hear me right this time?

- Throw the trash in that.
- I hear you.

About 10 bricks.

BRODY: There's 10 of them.
Look at them. Solid.

- Three, four...
- What's up with him?

He's asleep, man.
You snooze, you lose, man.

You know what, matter of fact?

We'll tell him it was three,
we'll give him one.

We'll split nine.
This is your boy anyway.

We're getting money. We're getting money.
We're getting money. We're getting money.

Hey, man.
I know who we can sell this shit to.


My cousin Shavoo.

- Who?
- Shavoo.

Ohhh! I forgot about...

- Wait a minute. Your cousin?
- Yeah, yeah.

How come we ain't rob him?

'Cause he's my cousin, Guch.

So what he your cousin?
You robbed my cousin.

It was your idea to rob your fucking cousin.
Now, you're gonna...

You're supposed to have some ideas
to rob your cousin.

Shit, we ain't got to rob him now.
He'll buy all that shit.

Oh, yeah? How you know that?

Oh! Man, trust me.
The dude is a cocaine cowboy.

He'll turn 10 into 20.
I seen him do it before.

Twenty? How?

(EXHALES) Look, man,
I used to work for him, all right?

About two years ago.

One time, I had to re-up.
He tells me to pick up some acetone

and meet him down at the apartment
down in Puerto Rican ville.

One of his bitch's cribs, I guess.
I'm like, "Acetone?"

Anyway, I get there.
The bitch open up the door for me.

It was so much dust
coming out of her house,

I thought the fucking kitchen was on fire.

She pulls me in quickly, lock the door.
Now I'm getting nervous.

I walk in the living room and who I see?

- Buddy? Who's that?
- Buddy.

Buddy's his right-hand man.

I been around this guy
and he won't tell me his name.

So I just call him Buddy.

- Won't tell you his name?
- Yeah.

What kind of shit is that? You asked him?

Plenty of times, and the motherfucker
still won't tell me his name.

So, anyway, where was I?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I see Buddy knee deep up
into a pile of coke this high,

mixing all this powder, dust is everywhere.

Shavoo comes out the bathroom,
starts pushing me back off in the door.


I look around and see this machine.
That's when it hit me.

This motherfucker's making this shit.

- Making it?
- Making the shit.

They done fucked around,
hooked up with them Dominicans.

Them Dominicans then showed him
them re-rock machines.

They're compressing the shit,
turning two into four and four into more.

That's how I know they gonna buy them.

Good. He better. Plus, if he don't buy them,

I'm gonna rob the motherfucker
next week for sure. Call him.


- What?
- BROD Y ON PHONE: Don't "what" me, get up.

- Who this?
- BROD Y: It's Bro.

Oh! What up, man?

I'm what's up, man.
Hey, look, we need to talk, for real.

- SHAVOO ON PHONE: About what?
- Listen.

Hey, boy, I got these bad...

(SHUSHING) Whoa! Hold up.
Come on, dawg, watch your language

I know, I know. I don't curse.
Look, check this out.

10 bad bitches at the crib
I have ten kilograms of cocaine

right now trying to fuck.
at my residence that I wish to sell.


How do they look?
Of what quality?

They are of the finest quality

And you're gonna love them.
and ideally suited for a man of your stature.

They're your type of bitches.

Well, you know me, Bro,
Thank you, but if they are too expensive,

I don't care how bad the bitch is.

If she too old, I ain't pulling my dick out.
I will decline a purchase.

Man, they're about as young as they come.
They are VERY reasonably priced.

You dig what I'm saying?

Look, they half the ages of the bitches
Perhaps one half what you are accustomed.

that you fucking right now.
You hear me, Shavoo?

Let me ask you something, Bro.
How does one of your standing

How did you get 10 bitches?
acquire 10 kilograms?

BROD Y: Because I get bitches.

Look, check this out, if you and your boys
No matter, if you and your associates

are trying to fuck right now,
have any interest,

y'all need to hurry up and do what y'all
You better hurry up as there are other

gonna do, because they're gonna be gone.
gentleman I can contact.

- You dig?
- Yeah. I dig.

All right, so keep them there. I want to
see them. I'll be there in like a minute.

BROD Y: All right, dawg.

Who the fuck is that?

- That's what's up. All right.
- All right.


ERIC: What the fuck is this?

Merry Christmas to whoever gets that.


I want-o.


Smoking. Yes, sir. I'm liking that.

LEO: Hey, yo,
what the fuck you doing in here?

Is that fucking funny?
Is that fucking funny?

I had a blade in my hand, asshole.
Scrotum face. What's good?

Morning glory. That's my dude.

- Yes.
- You want some of that?


Yo, you keep fucking around,
you're gonna get fired, man.

Shit, I ain't gonna get fired.

Yeah, you are. You're gonna get me fired.

You ain't gonna get fired.
Your moms, she love you.

Yeah, well,
she was about to fire my ass today.

I was thinking about your moms.
How's she doing?

- Come on now.
- That came out wrong?

- Yeah.
- My bad.

- What she want to fire you for?
- That's another story.

Fuck this job. I hate this fucking job.

The only reason I got this job
is to keep my P.O. off my back.

I shouldn't have fucked her.
That pussy was good, though.

- (SCOFFS) You're fucking joking. Yeah.
- No, I'm not, man.

If I couldn't steal here, what the fuck
would I want to work here for, man?

- Punk ass checks ain't paying my bills.
- That's what I'm saying.

"That's what I'm saying"?
What the fuck is you saying?

That's what I'm saying. I'm saying...

- I hate you, that's what I'm saying.
- Why?

I'm a hater. I'm a hater of you.

What do you mean? Why?
You live with a beautiful woman,

taking care of your bills,
cooking your food,

doing your goddamn dirty-ass laundry.

I'm saying I'm trying to move out
and I can't afford to.

Well, you get your balls up.
Get in these boxes.

Who do you think I got it from?

- That's hot.
- How much do you think it pays for?

- What?
- 10K.

Gonna see my man Sandu Ajula,
bing bong. Easy.

Come on, man. You're in America.
Steal something.

- No, man.
- Free money.

How many hands
you think done touched these boxes

before we get them?
What the fuck are they gonna say?

"You stole my shit"? I wish they would.

I'd be on Larry King crying, "This terrible
discrimination after all these years..."

- Shit! Kiss my ass.
- Dude, you're acting like you rich.

- You are acting like you're rich, right now.
- No, I'm not. I'm acting like...

I'm not rich. Get on a level.
Get with me. Feel me.

- You're bugging. I got boxes to load.
- Peace and love.

Oh! You got some boxes.
What you got? What you got?

Chill, man. Chill. Be easy, all right?

- Yo, tell your moms I said peace.
- Yo.

I'm just saying.
What, I can't appreciate your mom?

- Come on, man.
- That came out wrong.

My bad. Good things. Good things.



To track a package, press one.

SHAVOO: You remember my cousin Brody?
BUDDY: Used to work for you?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, a little bit.

Okay. Brody called me this morning, right?

Brody tells me
he's got some bitches at his crib.

He want me to come check out.

Shit. That's good. You know me,
I'm always down to fuck some hoes.

Stop, man. I'm not talking about
those kind of bitches.

I'm talking about "bitches" bitches.



Some bricks.


There's certain words
you just can't throw around up in the whip.

Come on, Shav, what you thinking?
Your joint is bugged?

SHAVOO: Man, I'm telling you.
I'm at the crib, I'm checking my phone,

I hear an echo every time I check it.
Fucking Feds. Fucking Feds.

But anyway, he got 10 bitches. Ten.

Damn. How did he get 10?

Who knows?
Brody, probably hit somebody.

That's why I got you rolling with me.

I don't trust those clown-ass boys for shit.

Hey, man, you know, I got your back.

School's out. Recess is over.
Your boy don't play.

- I like that.
- Yeah.

SHAVOO: Oh! B, I had to let him go, man.
He was knocking my hustle.

I had to put family to the side for a minute.

Fire his ass.

You really, really got to watch him
'cause his crew just like him.

All they do is hunt down hustlers.
That's why I got this vest on.



Wish you'd told me earlier.

I'd have worn mine
in case anybody wanna act stupid.

Remember Deuce?

Deuce, Deuce.

- Big timer, West Philly.
- Yeah.

- Remember him?
- Yeah.

They got him.

They did that?

Yo! Yo! Motherfuckers.
Better come in here and help me up, man.

I'm not fucking playing...

Shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up!

Yo, you don't gotta be killing him.

Yo, Guch, he keeps
popping the tape off with his mouth.


- GUCH: Knock him out!
- Yeah.


It's like that?
Hold up, dawg. Hold on. Hold on.


Oh, shit!

Run your motherfucking mouth now, bitch.

You run your...

What you doing?

What you do, man?
I told you to knock him out.

I thought you said cut it out.

SHAVOO: The real fucked up thing about
it was it was Deuce's own cousin Guch,

Brody's thieving ass boy.

303. Bingo.

- Yo, what you doing?
- I'm laying them out.

That's a good idea.
That way if they want to rob our asses

they ain't gotta look all over for the shit.
They can just...

He's my cousin. Lighten up.
He's not gonna rob.

I don't give a fuck if it's your cousin.

That's what my cousin said.
Stop fucking around, man.

Hide them.
Leave one of the motherfuckers out.

They can look at one of them,
tell if it's good or not, right?

Damn. When they come with the money,
they can see the rest of them.



All right, man, I hear you.

SHAVOO: Open the door.

- (EXCLAIMS) What's up?
- My patience. What took you so long?

- BRODY: I had to take a shit.
- That's what that smell is.

BRODY: Guch, this is my cousin, Shavoo.
Shavoo, this is Guch.

What's up, man? And you are?


Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, get my man something to drink.

what was your name again?

You got any beer?

GUCH: Yeah. See if there's some beer
in there for him.

I got your name. Your name's Shavoo.

- But I didn't get your name. Your name is...
- My name.

And yours is Goosh. Right?

- Guch.
- BUDDY: Guch. Nice to meet you, Guch.


I said cheeseburgers and onion rings.

SHAVOO: Cousin, what the fuck is this?

Don't worry about this, man.
You gotta excuse my man here.

He be riding all night. It's cool.

Look like he need to ride his ass to bed.

That's his bed that he sat on.

- You want this chair right here?
- I don't want shit.

I wanna stand right here
and get down to business.

- Where the bitches at?
- I got one bitch right here for you.

Got something I can...


My man.



Yeah. That's good shit.

You got 10 of these, cousin?

- I got nine of them like that.
- SHAVOO: Yeah?

- Mmm-hmm. Make a nun get naked.
- Where they at, cousin?

Got them right here. Right here.

Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas.



SHAVOO: Yo, Bro,
where'd you cop these jones from?

Man, we got some Puerto Ricans coming...

Look, fuck where it's from.
We need to talk about where it's going.

'Cause they're leaving
out of this motherfucker today.

Now, y'all can fuck around if y'all want
and pass up the deal of a lifetime,

or y'all can stop bullshitting
and start talking about the money.

I got people I can call,
make them come get...

Fuck them!

I'm your man.

GUCH: Now you're talking.

How much you want for them, Guch?

Well, I know y'all probably

- copping these like 23, 24.
- Right.

So if you'll buy all these,
I'll give you 20 apiece.

Twenty apiece?
Come on, you kind of high, Sosa.

Real high.

Me and my boy, we make a run
in New York, get two for less than that.


Hopefully, y'all make it back.
Ain't no risk here. This is no risk.

Ain't no risk here. Know mean?

How many cats you know in this city
who cop 10 from the door?

I barely know any, so I know you don't.

Check it out.
Let me take these jones off your hands.

All profit. You know what I mean. All profit.

You give them to me for 15, I'll flip it.
Put 150 grand in your pocket today.

- Today?
- Fuck that! Matter of fact, two hours.


(WHISPERS) All right.


- Just be cool, man.
- SHAVOO: What's up?

What the fuck is the deal?

No, 15. Fifteen sounds good.
That sounds like a deal.

- We'll take 15.
- Except

y'all gotta be back here in two hours.

- Two hours, Shavoo.
- Done.

Yo, what y'all doing, man?
What you doing?

Drop this shit off,
I'll be right back with your money.

(SCOFFS) Hell, no!

What we look like? Boo-hoo the fool?

It's right here. When y'all get right back,
then y'all can get it.

What are you talking about?
You ain't got to worry.

It'll be sitting here right for you.

Y'all come back for the bitches later.

GUCH: Don't worry about it.
They'll be here when you get back.

- Shavoo.
- All right. Cool.

- And...
- BUDDY: Yeah, same here.

It's been real. Two hours.

BRODY: All right, Voo.

That's what's up.

BUDDY: So what you think?

I think we about to come up
like a motherfucker.

You know how much shit
I can make in there?

I ain't seen some jones that good since,
what, '92, '93.

I'm getting that new Cadillac.
I'm gonna have crushed velvet seats in.

I'm gonna keep that incense in it.
Everybody gonna wanna ride with me,

and I'm gonna say, "Nope.

"You wasn't fucking with me
when I ain't had no money."


I'm gonna be clean in a bitch.

Now you know
what we gotta do next, right?

- Storage.
- Storage.

- Damn! What took you so long?
- The stupid phone is what took me so long.

- So what did he say?
- It kept saying...

WOMAN ON PHONE: This is not
a valid tracking number.

Say your tracking number... character at a time...

Baby, fuck all that! Did you track it or not?

- 1V9...
- WOMAN: This is not a valid tracking number.

- Yo. No! No, I couldn't track it.
- Why not?

That's what I'm trying to tell you, Jesús.

It kept cutting me off.
It wouldn't let me say all the numbers.

- WOMAN: tracking number, one character...
- lf you shut up, I could finish.

All this time? What were you doing?

No! Not five, nine. Nine, you stupid bitch!

Tracking it!


- Tracking it?
- Yes. Tracking it.


What is that? Garlic? Hmm?


That shit was good.

You got something to eat, didn't you?
Didn't you?

Yes, Jesús, I got something to eat.
So what? I was hungry.

You shouldn't have spit on my food.

See, I give you one simple thing to do,
and you even fuck that up!

The phone didn't work. That is not my fault.

Yeah. Whatever, man. It's never your fault.




- Hello?
- Jesús.

Hola, Bodega.

- You got it, right?
- JESUS O VER PHONE: No, it ain't come yet.

- What do you mean it ain't come?
- It ain't come yet.

What the fuck you mean it ain't come yet?

I just tracked it right now.
It says it was delivered a few hours ago.

- What? It ain't come here.
- Mmm-mmm.

I already saw the guy.
He said we ain't get nothing today.

BODEGA: Ask your girlfriend
if she signed for it.

- My girl's standing right here.
- No.

Then why the fuck is it saying
it was delivered?

I don't know. I already saw the guy.
He said we ain't get nothing.



That motherfucker!

(WHISPERING) What motherfucker?
What happened?

- He stole it!
- Who stole the shit?

The NDA dude. He had to.

That's why he had the buggy-eyed look
on his face.

Look, Bodega,
I'm gonna find this motherfucker. Trust me.

Yeah. You do that.

Because let me tell you, Jesús,
if you're lying to me,

you're gonna wish your name was Jesus,

CHITA: What happened? What'd he say?

What happened? What happened?
What happened?

- We gotta find this thief!
- What thief, Jesús?

Motherfucker, is you loco?
Huh? Taking my shit.

Taking Jesus' shit!


This isn't gonna work.


Motherfucker, you wanna die? Huh? Do you?

Where's my shit?


I shouldn't have to say that much.
It just ain't scary.

Jesús? What are you doing?


Where's my shit, motherfucker?

I'm gonna go try to catch him on the Ave.

- Where the fuck you going?
- With you, Jesús.

- For what?
- What you mean "for what"?

I know you. You're fucking crazy.

LEO: Hey. Hey, ladies.
Ladies, what's happening with y'all?

Hey, what's up, ladies? How y'all doing?

- He's so crazy. Is he trying to...
- Hey, I'm trying to holler. What's up?


Please, you work for NDA.

Oh! My bad. I thought y'all was hookers.
Just trying to pick y'all up.

It's not like if we were,
you could afford us anyway.

(MOCKING) "If we were
you couldn't afford us."

Listen here, all right, with your flat asses.
I get the finger?


Forget that girl. For real.

I don't even need her.
All I really need is my weed.


I know I got a joint up in here somewhere.
Time to smoke a J.

I need to get my ass to Shelton Ave
and re-up.

SHAVOO: Since we're getting the cheese,
might as well get the compressor, too,

- while we in there.
- BUDDY: Shit, yeah.

SHAVOO: You know, I been thinking, man.

I've been thinking about
stopping this whole game, you know?

Calling it quits.

(LAUGHING) There you go.

No, I'm serious, man.
I know I done said it plenty of times before.

A million times I done said it,
but I'm for real this time. This is my stop.

You might as well flip one more
for the road.

No, man. Jones is a dead end.
I'm cool. I mean it.

I'm gonna cut through the grass, you know.

I'm gonna make my own path. I can't
tell you where I'm going to land but...

With 500 grand,

I'll be all right.

So, what's up? I mean,

you might as well come, too.

I ain't got enough to chill.

Chill don't pay the bills.

Well, sometimes, you gotta take a chance
with what you got, B.

You know, there was a time
big cat couldn't tell me shit either.

But look here, man, just promise me this.

Always remember what you're doing it for.

If it ain't worth dying for,

you don't wanna be in it.

I mean, in the end,
that's all that really matters.

Know what I mean?

Know mean.

SHAVOO: I feel like a free man already.


Hey, Voo.

SHAVOO: Oh, shit.

All right, look, the first place

- we're gonna hit is the Ave.
- Okay.

Keep your eyes peeled
for a gray NDA truck.

And you know I don't like you coming
with me, so don't be wiling it out.

Yo, man. You act like I don't know
how to fucking act or something.

You don't, all right?
And if you ain't gonna listen to me,

then take your ass back up in the house.

Calm down.


- Shit! Shit!
- Shut up, man.

- Why? Why?
- Calm down.

We gonna figure this shit out!
We gonna figure this shit out, man.

Now calm the fuck down.

- How much was here?
- A few hundred thou.

- A few hundred?
- Yeah.

- Shit, man.
- A few hundred.

I thought, all this time,
I just knew you had more than that.

- I don't, all right?
- Come here, Shavoo. Come here.

Man, what the fuck?

- Who all knew about this joint?
- Nobody but you.

Well, shit, you know I ain't take it.


Don't you?

- Shav?
- Yeah, man. Look, man...

See! See! They got me thinking, man.
I trust you. You know that.

Hi, guys.

What the fuck you looking at?

Nobody, man. He work here.
Be cool. Be cool.

Yo, Shav, now, whoever came up in here,
they had a car,

because they took the compressor
and that's a heavy-ass motherfucker.

You ain't just walking up out here with that.

BUDDY: They rolled in here.

They put the compressor in the back
and they rolled out.

Yeah. Yeah. Let's get that ass.

What the fuck is you doing?

Me? I'm just...

- What the fuck is you doing?
- I'm just leaning on here.

You know? I'm just like, leaning. You know.

- Know mean?
- Know mean?

Get your punk ass in here, motherfucker.

BUDDY: You know Allah, motherfucker?

JESUS: God damn! Where the fuck you at?

Any other day, you see these motherfuckers
all over the place.

- Today, not one fucking truck.
- Papi, calm down.

I'm not used to seeing you bitch like this.

You'd be bitching, too,
if you knew what I know.

Know what, Jesús?
What are you talking about?

Okay. Remember Hector?

Yeah, that dude you used to work for.
What about him?

That's right.
One day he calls me up talking crazy,

thanking me and shit.

- Yo!
- Phew! Thank you, Jesus.

Yo, all the shit I gave you, go get it,
bring it to the spot right now.

(SCOFFS) Yo, dawg,
half that stuff is on the street, man.

No, I don't give a fuck where it's at.
Go get it, bring it to the spot right now.

Yo, what...


I get there, and this big motherfucker
answers the door.

BODEGA: Hey, look. Your friend is here.

- Is it all there?
- No. Not even half.

Your name is Jesús?

- Jesus.
- BODEGA: Jesus.

My name is Bodega Diablo.
This is my associate, Rhino.

I call him the Grim Reaper.

And you start lying to me,
you're gonna know why.

You know, it's funny,

just talking to your friend here
for a little while,


it seems like I've known you all my life.

I know about your mother.
I even know about your father.

- Fuck. How?
- BODEGA: God bless his soul.

Now I...

No. You need to be straight up with me
right about now.

A couple of days ago,
I sent your friend here a package.

After a long talk,
he told me that he never got it.

- He says you have it.
- Me?

Shut the fuck up!


Shut the fuck up!

Now where's my shit?

I almost shit on myself.

The last thing I wanted to do is to
tell this man that I don't have his shit.

Right, right. So what did you say?

I didn't bite my tongue like no bitch.
I told him the truth.

Look, this motherfucker right here...

JESUS: I look him
dead in the eyes and I said,

"Look, I don't know what Hector told you,
but I don't think my friend

"had anything to do
with your shit being stolen.

"I've known this guy my whole life.

"One thing I can bet my life on
is that he ain't no thief.

"Now whatever it takes,
we'll get your money back.

"Just let my friend go."

Damn, baby, you said that shit?

You fucking right I said that shit,
and then check this out.

JESUS: He had the nerve to say...

Shut up!

Your boss, he's fired, okay?
You now work for me.

JESUS: I'm standing there thinking,
"I gotta be out of my goddamn mind...

It's cool with me man.
Whatever you say.

"...if you think I'm gonna work for a piece
of shit Mexican ass motherfucker like you."

- Hell, no.
- For what?

So I can end up like this?
You're fucking crazy.

So I looked him dead in the eyes,

and I said what any real motherfucker
would have said.

What did you say?


Yes, sir.

Shit, I ain't stupid, now.
A Cali connect, exactly what I needed.

And that's what I'm talking about.

Yo, baby! Yo, that's him right there!

- Ain't that him?
- Shit!


JESUS: Oh, shit! That's gotta be him.
That's gotta be him, yo.

- Give me the shotgun. This motherfucker...
- Here.

Stay your ass in the car! You hear me?
Stay in the car!

Stay in the car!

Where's my shit, motherfucker?

Sir, do you have an account with NDA?

Don't be playing with me.
You know what the fuck I'm talking about.

Fuck that shit.

ERIC: Okay. Okay. All right. All right.
Listen. Listen. Just hold tight.

Just don't report me. You can take that.

You done sold that shit already?

I don't know what you're talking about.
I didn't...


- No, you don't know what the...
- No.

You know what the fuck I'm talking about!


- Don't lie to me!
- Chi.

- I don't know what you're talking about.
- You don't know?

- No.
- CHITA: No? Okay.

Listen, we don't keep cash in the truck.

You can just take this because it's all I got.

What the fuck is this? Huh?

Fake gold.

- I don't wear fake gold.
- I wasn't trying to insult you.

- Turn around! Now!
- Okay. Okay. I'm turning around.

CHITA: All the way.

- CHITA: What?
- What the hell are you doing here?

You were taking too fucking long.

- Turn around.
- You said all the way.

- JESUS: What the fuck is wrong with you?
- I'm sorry, okay.


- What? What?
- I don't even think that's him.

What do you mean that's not him?

- JESUS: That's not him.
- It's not me.


Chi, just relax.


- It's cool.
- CHITA: Now what? What now?

JESUS: Let's get the hell out of here.

What about this?

Take that shit. I'll rock it.

(STAMMERING) Can I say one thing?

- BOTH: What?
- No disrespect. No disrespect.

I like your outfit. You look very nice.
I like your shoes. I like your top.

- The pants.
- Thank you.

Get your ass out of the truck. Now!

Turn the fuck around.

What the fuck is wrong with you?
"Nice outfit."

Damn that bitch is bad.

BRODY: Hello? Shavoo?

Oh, man, damn. Don't say that, man.

- What, what?
- Shut the fuck up and chill.

All right, man, I guess. All right. Go on.

- (SCOFFS) Damn.
- What the fuck he say?

That was Shavoo, man.
Something came up.

He said he ain't nothing gonna pop off
till the morning.

Oh! Ain't that a bitch?
See, that's what I'm talking about.

- What happened to that two hour shit?
- I don't know. Shit.

That's what I fucking mean, man.

I'm glad I didn't let the motherfuckers
take the package out of here.

Just be cool, man.
Everything will work out.

Ain't no "be cool" shit, man.
A lot could happen by tomorrow morning.

This motherfucker right here
might wake up.

BRODY: Please, he ain't waking up.

I think that motherfucker's
trying to set us up, man.

He's not gonna set us up, man.
It's my cousin. I keep telling you, man.

Now, look, if he said by tomorrow,
tomorrow it'll be. I know.

Okay, cool! What if he say two hours?
What do that mean?

That mean we celebrate, baby.
You know what I'm saying?

You know the little freak chick, Kira, right?

I'm gonna call her and a couple of her little
friends over, you know what I'm saying?

Have them come over tonight,
tighten us up.

By tomorrow, we be ready, baby.

We'll be busting four and five nuts,
we'll be ready to get that money, honey.

BRODY: I'm gonna call her right here.
GUCH: You know which one I like,

that young Chinatown...

(SINGING) We gonna bend her, spin her
and go up in her!

Tell her there ain't no bullshit, man.
Tell her no bullshit going on.

Hey, what's up? What y'all doing?

Hey, why don't you
get a couple of your little girls

and why don't y'all swing through here

and do something strange
for a little piece of change?

DERRICK: Look...


Look, I don't know
what you're talking about...

- Yo, Shav. What you got there?
- Please...

Got some acetone.
"Extremely flammable liquid..."

Okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay! I'll tell you!
I'll tell you! I'll tell you!

It wasn't me. It wasn't me.
But I'll tell you. I'll tell you.

Who took my shit?


You took my shit, didn't you?

It wasn't me. It wasn't me,
but I'll tell you who it is. I'll tell you.

Please. Please. Okay. Okay.

So, what you doing tonight, baby?


What would you say
if we took a helicopter ride to AC

and gambled a little bit?


No, you're funny girl.
No, all this here is just a front, baby.

I'm balling, baby. I'm balling.

Yo, dang, man, let me call you back.

Hey, brother, how can I help you?

What up, man?

Wade, right?

- Yeah, Wade.
- Cool.

- Let me get some rope.
- Rope.

(CLICKS TONGUE) And some tape.

And some tape. Here you go, bro.

Duct tape would be better.

- Duct tape. Okay. Got that.
- Yup. I need duct tape.

Here you go, brother. Duct tape.
I'll take that for you.

And a padlock.
How could I forget a padlock?

Padlock. Here it is.

- Cool.
- That's what's up.

It's a good one?

Yeah, that's a good one, man.
Everybody get that one.

Okay. Cool.

- I got my rope, padlock, tape.
- Is that it, brother?

- (LAUGHS) And I'm gonna need my money.
- What the fuck is you talking about?

Man, we don't even do that up in here, man.
I don't know what you're talking...

Before you start all that lying and shit,

let me paint a picture for you,
where my head is at right now.


I need you to feel me.

You talking to a brother
that just lost everything,

and picture
he knows for a fact that you took it.


So, actually, I want you to... No, fuck that.
I can't wait for you to lie about it.

You feel me?

Yo, Voo, you good?

SHAVOO ON PHONE: Yep. We good.

We all good.



Motherfucker, what you relaxing for?
This shit ain't over.

Oh! Motherfucker...


You know what that one told me?

He told me this padlock
was the best padlock in the joint.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, you told me that, remember?


He knows his shit. You can't cut them.

- No?
- No.

WADE: I can't breathe.


CASS: (LAUGHS) That's crazy.
You see this bitch?

Sparrow. What's good, buddy?


What's up? What's up?

- What's up? What's up, Leo?
- What's up, Cass?

- All right.
- Good to see you.

- Where the weed at?
- Got it right here. What you looking for?

What you got? You got dimes? Dubs?
What's up?

I'm all out of dimes. Only got...

But you don't want that, though, man.



I only got dubs left. What you looking for?

Let me get two dubs. That's what's up.

CASS: Two of them?
LEO: Yeah.

I've got you.

- Here you go, homey. Appreciate it.
- No doubt.

CASS: Everything good?

It's gravy, but...

I know they a little small
because they was in my pocket.

They smashed down,
but it ain't the size of the boat,

it's the motion in the ocean.
That shit be flowing. Trust me.

Look, I think you should
get back to work ASAP.

- Seriously.
- Yo!

- CASS: Get back to work, homey.
- Yo! Get... Oh, man.


CASS: That's crazy.


- Hello?
- Where the fuck you been?

- I've been calling all fucking day, man.
- I've been out looking for the guy, man.

BODEGA O VER PHONE: What happened?
Did you find him?

Listen, man, I looked everywhere.
I can't find him, look, but...



He hung up.

You stupid motherfucker.
You want to play games?

Okay. I'll play.




We're gonna be all right.


I'm gonna protect you.


Pack our bags. We're going to Philly.




Hello! Hello?

Hello! Hello?


- Chi! Chi! Wake up!
- What?

Yo, I'm about to go find this puto
while it's still early.

- What puta?
- Qué puta? The fucking NDA guy.

He's out there. I can smell him.

- I'm coming with you.
- Oh, no. After yesterday? Uh-uh!

I am not staying here by myself.

Jesús, tú estás loco
if you think they're gonna kill me.

I wanna live. I'm not fucking staying here.


- Yo, I think Bodega just called.
- Why? What he say?

Motherfucker ain't say nothing, man.
He just hung up.

I know that was him, though.
Trying to scare somebody.

- I don't know who the fuck he thinks he is.
- Hell, no.

I ain't no motherfucking Hector.
I ain't no bitch.

- I'm motherfucking Jesus.
- That's right, baby.

- I'm gonna fuck him up!
- Yes, you will, baby.

You fuck him up,
but before you talk about fucking anybody,

why don't you check the door?
Maybe NDA left a note about the package.

If he thinks I'm bowing down to him,
he's crazy.

- I'll bring him war. I will fuck him up.
- Yes, baby, you fuck him up.

- JESUS: Oh, shit.
- Fuck who up?


The guy. The guy, man.
That's what I was about to go do now.

Yo, what the fuck is...

What's going on?

What guy?

The NDA guy, man.

That's who I was about to go fuck up.

Oh! Yeah, yeah. He was.

Well, let's go. You, too.

Me? Why me?
I ain't got nothing to do with this.

Is that right? We'll see about that.
Now get dressed.

Get dressed!

We're gonna need more of these.

Yeah, man, no problem.

I'll be there in a minute.

BRODY: Yes! They on their way.

Man, just think, man,
when we get that money,

we can get this place fixed up,
you know what I'm saying?

The way we want to, you know.

Man, fuck this place, man.
I'm getting me a new spot, man.

I'm tired of living with y'all.

BRODY: You're getting
brand-new already, huh?

GUCH: Brand-new?
What you talking about, man? Shit.

Man, y'all lucky I don't take all this stuff.
I stole all of it.

What the fuck are you doing?

I'm just putting a few mousetraps
around this motherfucker.

Just in case motherfuckers try some shit,
they have another thing coming.

I told you, motherfucker,
he ain't gonna do nothing.

How many times I gotta tell you that?

What're you talking about, man?
I don't fucking know them. You know them.

If you think for one second
that I'm gonna be in here ass-naked

with 10 bricks in one hand
and my dick in the other, you fucking crazy.

Let me explain something to you.
Number one, I ain't no bitch!

And if they try anything around here,
they gonna have to kill me.

Well, thank you,
'cause they're gonna have to kill me, too.

That's my family, Guch. I told you.
He ain't gonna try nothing.

I grew up with him. I know his mom.
I know his daddy.

I know everybody
in the motherfucking family.

Man, that shit
don't mean nothing to me, man!

You don't never let your guard down
talking about family. Fuck that!

This ain't no fucking game.
Ten bricks is 10 bricks!

A hustler will kill you for that. I would!

You'll kill me?

You know I don't mean that bullshit, man.
I ain't even say that shit like that.

- No.
- No, man,

- don't even try that shit on me, man.
- Mmm-hmm.

I said somebody else would kill you.
That's what I was saying.

A motherfucker would kill you for one.
You already know that.

You're one of them motherfuckers.

I hear you.


You! Get your ass in here.

Oh, God.

BUDDY: All right. Make it rain.

SHAVOO: No, no, no.
Give me that. Give me that.

Man, I hope this boy don't act stupid.

- Now you get the money.
- BUDDY: Got it.

- What the fuck is that?
- What do you mean? It's a gun.

For real? I thought it was a pogo stick.
No shit it's a gun.

What are you doing with that, B?

You want the whole neighborhood to know
what we're gonna do up in this joint?

- Well...
- Come on, man.

I'm just saying,
them cats start firing up there,

I don't want to be the only one
without heat.

Well, hide it. Come on. Hide that. For real.

But, B, let me ask you something.

We get to firing up there,
like you say, right?

You think you're gonna be able to
pull that joint out in time?

Fuck pulling it out.
I shoot the motherfuckers through the bag.

You can't even
get the motherfucker in the bag.

I show you better than I can tell you.


You think I'm playing with you?
Where is it?


I swear to God I don't know where it is.
I swear to Jesus.

Don't be swearing on me,
you lying piece of shit.

What's your name?


Now, yesterday
you delivered a box to where?

7500 Wissahickon Avenue.

And I know it was in your truck,
but for some reason it never got there.

Now somewhere from here to there,
it got lost.

And I know you know where.

- I swear to God...
- And listen!

If I was you, I would think real hard
before I said anything,

because what you don't know
could kill you.

Now, where is it?

All right. Just let me think about it, okay?

Why the fuck can't I think...

Okay. All right. 303.

- I remember the box. It's 303.
- See. Now where'd you take it to?

- I delivered it.
- We was there all day! Wasn't we, Chi?

Yeah, we were and you did not deliver it.
Get your story...

I'm telling the truth here!

JESUS: I even asked you if we got anything.

- No, I don't remember all that.
- Oh! You don't remember all of that.

Man, you're a bitch ass liar.
Let me kill this motherfucker.

I'll take you to it.

- What did you say?
- I'll take you to it.

You're damn straight...


Look. You're gonna take me there, okay?

But I swear to God on my mother's eyes
if you're lying to me, I will leave you there.

Damn, Brody was right.


God sent us this shit.

He knew we needed a way out,
and he providing us with a way out.

I will never rob another motherfucker again.
I won't run up in nobody's banks.

I ain't gonna run up
in nobody's stores no more.


I ain't gonna tap nobody
and take their shit no more.

- BRODY: Hey, Guch.
- I'm done with that.

BRODY: They're here!

Yeah, Shavoo, I forgot to ask you, man.
How's your mom doing?

My moms died last year, Bro.

- Damn, ain't nobody told me nothing.
- Yeah. Yeah. But fuck all that.

You didn't go and grow a brain on me
last night, did you?

What's that mean?

No, I mean, this is the same shit
I seen last night, right?

What you think? I'm gonna switch the shit?

SHAVOO: I'm saying, it's been a long time
since we... Since we hung out.

Brothers will do anything
for a dollar these days, Bro.

I mean, my end is straight.
What about yours?

What about me?

I ain't seen you in a long time either.
You could be fucked up.

When have I ever been known
to be fucked up, Bro?

Well, like you said, a brother
would do anything for some money.

Yeah. Just call your boy.


I'm a drug dealer now.



Come on, Bro,
what's taking your man so long?

BRODY: Here he come, right here. Here he is.

Let's get this party started.

- What up, Shavoo?
- What up, Guch?

What up, dawg. What's your name again?


Guch, right? You're a funny cat.


I almost got you. So what's up?
I'm glad y'all made it, man.

I was about to get on the phone
and start making some calls.

Stop bullshitting. You know I'm all you got.

Shit. This shit will sell itself.
All I got to do is make a few calls.

Them calls will kill you.

This ain't weed, Guch. This is coke.
Brothers will kill for coke.

- Yeah?
- SHAVOO: Yeah.

Well, these days I'm prepared for anything.

What you say me and you stop fucking
around before we both go elsewhere?

GUCH: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now you talking.

So, what's up? What's up, bro?
Y'all got that money?

- Right there. You got that shit?
- BRODY: Hell, yeah, I got that shit.

Just the way we laid it out for you last time.
All laid out.

Check that out, B.

Yo, hold on, man!
Yo, what you doing, man?

- SHAVOO: Relax.
- No, I ain't no relaxing!

Ain't nobody checking nothing out.
I'm checking the money out.

This is becoming a tense situation.

Yeah, you know what, Shavoo?
I don't like surprises.


What y'all talking so loud for?

Keep it down.

(SOFTLY) Neither do I.
I thought this motherfucker was dead.


That's what I'm talking about.
I need to count that money.

BUDDY: Let me check this out, man.


Come on.

Make sure you see the right one, and
don't be looking at the numbers, either.

Take us straight to the door you took it to.

All right. Just give me a second.
I'm trying to remember.


Damn, man, it was just yesterday.

I know,
but I was high as hell yesterday, man.

Don't give me that high shit.
Just find it. Come on.

- What you doing?
- Counting hundred stacks.

Okay. That way, you can just stack shit
all over the house,

- so we know exactly what we have?
- Yeah.

Man, you know you ain't never had to
count no damn money before, man.

Look, make 50 stacks of 20s, okay.

After you get 10 of them,
put it all together, that's $10,000.

Please, do it the way
I'm asking you how to do it, man.

That way,
we can get out of here sometime today.

- All right?
- All right.

- This is it, right here.
- You're a fucking liar. All right?

Don't you try that shit, pothead.
You know that shit ain't it.

Matter of fact,
I stuck my head out of here yesterday

and asked you if we got anything.

You're right. That's right. He's right.

See, I told you.
Now where did you take it to?


All right. I came out that door over there,

because the elevator sometimes works.

- The elevator works?
- Yeah, man, sometimes.

And I walked down this way.

- This is it, right here.
- See, I told you!


- I told you he didn't bring it here...
- Shut the fuck up.

You want the whole block down here?

- Would you shut up?
- You shut up. Don't tell me to...

Shut up!

Are you sure this is it?

Yeah, I'm sure.
I must have taken it to the wrong address.

- Fucking dickhead.
- Stupid ass.

You're right. You guys are absolutely
right about me. I'm a dickhead.

Okay. I can't believe I messed this up.


Well, you know what?
I'm gonna get up on out...

Where do you think you're going?

What you talking about?
I'm going back to work.

Okay. You guys asked me
to take you to where I took it,

and this is where I took it. All right?
This is it, right here.

People are gonna be looking for me.

There's gonna be
a lot more people looking for you

if you don't get my shit back.

There ain't no way in hell
I can get your shit back, man.

What the hell do you want me to do?

Who the fuck is that?

- I don't know.
- SHAVOO: What you mean?

It's your house, motherfucker.
What do you mean you don't know?

I don't know. I ain't got no friends.
How I know it ain't y'all's people?

Oh, no. No, no, no.

Hey, now, look. When we get the shit,
y'all get the money.

No, man. Look.
Y'all motherfuckers better calm down.

You got guns all over this...

BUDDY: That ain't no mama-knock.

Fuck this shit, Shav.

- What the fuck is going on?
- Who the fuck's that at the door?

Who is it?

- It's that NDA guy.
- Well, don't answer it.

He might have another box for us.

Oh, shit!

Box? Get that shit, B.

Man, that was a grown-ass man knock.
Fuck that shit.

You see something?
Can you see down there?

Guch, what the fuck is going on
up in here?


All right, go ahead, open it.

- What the fuck?
- Bro.

Yo, what's up?

Hey, how you doing?
Yesterday, I dropped a box off here,

and it's the wrong address.

So if you'll just give me the box back,
I'll take it to its rightful owner.

- Give me a minute.
- Okay.

- See, I told you.
- Shut up.

- What'd he say?
- He said he wants the box back.


Tell him what we said. You know, tell him
we took it back down to the station.

It came here,
and it came to the wrong address.

Yo, Guch. What the fuck is going on?

Hey. So do you have it?

Well, we did have it.


- What the fuck is you doing?
- Shh! Shut the fuck up.

You know what I mean,
we took it back down to the station,

- 'cause it had the wrong address on it.
- Oh! Okay.

BODEGA: What, you think I'm fucking stupid?


BRODY: Fuck.
BUDDY: Damn you.

Get your ass in the house. You hear me?

I don't know what the fuck
is going on here.



Yeah, neither do I.

- But I know one thing, that's my shit.
- Fuck you, that's my shit!

It's in my house.

Who you think you are?
Who you think you are,

coming to my crib,
waving your guns around, talking shit?

You see, that shit was coming to my crib!

He fucked up
and brought it to the wrong spot.

No, I don't got nothing to do with this shit.
Yo! Why don't we just put the guns down?

Shut the fuck up!

So what you thought, you was just gonna
come in here and take some shit.

- Is that what you thought?
- I ain't leaving without it.

Yeah, we ain't leaving here without it.

No? Y'all ain't gonna leave without it?


Then take this with you.



Get the fuck out of here!


You want war, motherfucker?


What? What?



Fuck! That's my cousin, bitch!



- Get the shit!
- Yeah, I got it. I got the gun.

- SHAVOO: Go! Go!
- Hey, Shav!




Come on!



RHINO: Where are you crawling to,
you fucking cockroach?


This is for Bodega.



SHAVOO: Always remember
what you're doing it for.

If it ain't worth dying for,
you don't wanna be in it.

God, if this is your way to tell me
to stop smoking weed, I hear you.

I hear you.

Oh, shit.


- What?
- Okay?

You don't want this.

I'm telling you right now,
you don't want this.

Get your ass back in that apartment.



CHITA: Jesús?




Baby! Baby!

Oh, God!




Oh, my God.


Baby! Baby.

Are you okay?

- Oh, my God. Baby.
- Chi. Chi, help me up.

Come on.


What? Are you okay?

JESUS: Shit.

Chi. Chita.

Get the Ileyo.

- Get the Ileyo?
- Get the Ileyo.

- Go.
- All right, all right, all right.


CHITA: Hold up, hold up, hold up.

Hold up, hold up.


I get money, I get money
I get, I get, I get, I get


I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it


I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

I take quarter water
sold it in bottles for two bucks

Coca-Cola came and bought it
for billions, that's wassup?

Have a baby by me, baby, be a millionaire

I write the check before the baby comes

Who the hell cares

I'm stanky rich

I'm gonna die trying to spend this

Southside's up in this

Yeah, I smell like the vault
I used to sell dope

I did play the block now I play on boats

In the south of France, baby, St. Tropez

Get a tan? I'm already black

Rich? I'm already that

Gangster, and all that
Hit a head in a hat

Call that a riddle rap
Quit this chitter chat

I'm the baker, I bake the bread

The barber, I cut your head

The marksman, I spray the lead

I blood clot, chop ya leg
Do not want to with the kid

I get biz wit the cigg
I come where you live

You're dead

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

You can call this my new hit

But they ain't new though

I got rid of my old chick now I got new girls

First it was the Benzo
Now I'm in the Enzo

Ferrari, I'm sorry! I keep blowin' up!

They call me the cake man
The strawberry shake man

Make your whole click break-dance

Backspin, head spin
flatline, you're dead then

Nine shells, Mac-Who want me to crack down?

I was young I couldn't do good

Now I can't do bad
I ride, wreck the new Jag

I just buy the new Jag

Now tell me why you mad?

Oh, you can't do that

I'm so forgetful
They callin' me cocky

I come up out the jeweler
They callin' me Rocky

It's the ice on my neck, man
The wrist and my left hand

Bling like "Blaow"

You like my style

Ha, ha, I'm heading to the bank right now

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got

I... I get it

I get money, money is got


Money is got, money is got

I run New York!

Yeah, I talk the talk and I walk the walk

Like a Teflon Don, but I run New York

When I come outta court, yeah, I pop the Colt

I keep it gangsta, have ya outlined in chalk

I... I get it

In the hood if you ask about me

They'll tell you I'm about my bread

I... I get it

Round the world if you ask about me

They'll tell you they love the kid

I... I get it

Whoa! Hey!

I... I get it

Whoa! Hey!

I... I get it

Whoa! Hey!


Whoa! Hey!

I run New York!

Whoa! Hey!

I... I get it

Whoa! Hey!

I... I get it

Whoa! Hey!

Yeah, yeah, I run New York!

I get money, money is got
I get money, money is got

I get money, money is got
Money is got, money is got

I get money, money is got
I get money, money is got

I get money, money is got
I get money, money is got

Money is got, money is got

I get money, money is got
I get money, money is got

Money is got, money is got

I get money, money is got
I get money, money is got

I get money, money is got

Money is got, money is got

Special thanks to SergeiK.