Where The Wild Things Are Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Where The Wild Things Are script is here for all you fans of the Maurice Sendak movie directed by Spike Jonze. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Where The Wild Things Are quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards -- because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.

Where The Wild Things Are Script

  



  
Hey, Claire!
Wanna see something great?

  
Who else was there?

  
It's an igloo.

  
- And?
- I made it.

  
Yeah, my brother.

  
Hey, Claire?

  
I can't. We're supposed to go
to my dad's that weekend.

  
The snowplows left some
snow across the street...

  
- and I dug a hole into it.
- Max, go play with your friends.

  
You, go that way!
You, go that way!

  
No, don't talk to me like that!
You're just a fence!

  
You can go play
with your own fence friends.

  
Now move out!

  
Hey, Claire, what's up? Are you ready?
- Hey, guys!

  
...and chose him, okay?
- Yeah!

  
Claire, is that your brother?

  
Get him!

  
He's so dead!

  
Max, go away!

  
I got him!

  
Come on! Come on!

  
Get him!

  
You okay?

  
Come on, guys, let's go!

  
Hey, I'm home.

  
What's wrong?

  
Claire and her stupid friends
smashed my igloo.

  
She didn't do anything about it.

  
I'm sorry, honey.

  
I would have done something about it.

  
Max, what have you done?

  
∂ I took my lucky break
and I broke it in two, ∂

  
∂ Put on my worried shoes, ∂

  
No, I don't want to bother you.
Just... just quickly...

  
Can you tell me excatly what Mr. Lasseter
didn't like about the report?

  
Wha... What am I supposed to do?

  
No, I'm just tired.
And I'd a rough day here and...

  
I... I cannot afford to lose this.

  
I know. I know it.

  
But I better get started because
I'd like to turn it in the morning.

  
No, I hear you. I hear you.

  
And this will be the last time,
I promise, okay?

  
Thanks.

  
∂ My shoes took me down a crooked path ∂

  
Hey.
- Hi.

  
I could use a story.

  
Sure.

  
There were some buildings.

  
There are these really tall buildings.

  
And they could walk.

  
Then there were some vampires.

  
And one of the vampires bit
the tallest building.

  
And his fangs broke off.

  
Then all his other teeth fell out.
Then he started crying.

  
And then all the other vampires...

  
...said...

  
"Why are you crying?

  
"Aren't those just your baby teeth?"

  
And...

  
He said,
"No, those are my grown up teeth. "

  
And...

  
...the vampires knew that
he couldn't be a vampire anymore.

  
So they left him.

  
The end.

  
And the sun is the center of
our solar system.

  
It's the reason that
all the planets are here.

  
It, uh, it's warmth gives the sunlight,
makes our planet livable.

  
And of course the sun won't
always be here to keep us warm.

  
It, uh, like all things will die.

  
And when it does,
first it expands.

  
Enveloping all the surrounding planets,
including earth...

  
...before consuming rapidly.

  
The sun, after all, is just fuel,
burning ferociously.

  
When it runs of fuel, well,
it'll be gone.

  
Well, after that the...

  
...solar system will do dark,
permanently.

  
I'm sure by that time, the...

  
...human race will have fallen to
any numbers of calamities.

  
War, pollution, global warming,

  
...tsunamies...

  
...earthquakes, meteors...

  
Hey, who knows, right?

  
Mom?
Mom, come up here!

  
Max, I'm busy.

  
I rebuit the fort.
You gotta get inside it.

  
The lava's coming.

  
oh, and it's a rocket ship,
and it's gonna take off.

  
Want me to save you a seat?

  
You're really... nice.
- Cute.

  
- No.
- Not really.

  
Hi, sweety.

  
Claire!?

  
It's almost dinner,
get your stuff off the table, please.

  
Mom, what is that?

  
Pate.

  
Frozen corn?
What's wrong with real corn?

  
Frozen corn is real, alright?
And get off the chair, please.

  
And go tell your sister
to clear her stuff of the table.

  
Claire, get your stuff off
the dining room table.

  
Max, don't pull that now.

  
Max, get off the counter, please.
Get off.

  
I have a friend here...
you're embarrassing me?

  
Woman, feed me!

  
Max, get off.
Get off the counter!

  
Get off the damn counter, Max!
Now! Now!

  
- I'll eat you up!
- Get down!

  
Get over here!

  
Stop!

  
What is wrong with you?
This is not acceptable behavior.

  
You are not acceptable.

  
No dinner for you, Max.
Go to your room.

  
- You bit me, kind of hurt!
- Connie, he can't treat you like that.

  
Max, what is wrong with you?

  
- You're out of control!
- Not my fault.

  
Max!

  
Max!

  
Max!

  
I hate you.

  
Hello?

  
That's it. Tear them all down.
Tear them down.

  
Burn down!

  
We've got a few more
to go over here.

  
Is anyone going to help me?

  
We liked them.
They were nice.

  
I mean, this is a problem.
Don't you see this is a problem?

  
- I will...
- No, I'll just do it myself.

  
- Help?
- As usual.

  
Carol, could I talk to you
for a second?

  
- No, Douglas, not right now. I'm busy.
- Okay.

  
Can you hear me from up here?

  
And I'm the only one
who cares enough to do this.

  
Or this!

  
Carol, is this really necessary?
- Ask KW.

  
- You ask KW if it's necessary.
- She's not here. She left.

  
I, huh, she left!
She left, exactly!

  
That's why it's necessary.

  
- I'll help.
- Okay.

  
Okay, good.
Come on, come on, here you go.

  
- Thank you.
- Glad to help.

  
Who else want to lend a hand?
- What do you say, Judith?

  
- Should I help too?
- No, you shouldn't help him!

  
- I just thought it'll make him feel better.
- Yup, good idea, Ira.

  
Go stand in this hut over here
before it gets wrecked.

  
I know, I know, I shouldn't.
- Ira, you're not helping.

  
- Go in the hut.
- I'll stand right over here.

  
No!

  
This is crazy!

  
No, no, it was crazy already.

  
I'm just eliminating the crazy.

  
I don't think
the crazy's been eliminated.

  
Isn't anyone gonna be
on my side anymore?

  
Yeah, well, I guess not.

  
Fine.

  
I'll just be on my own side.

  
By myself.

  
Nobody cares.
I'm the only one that cares...

  
...that we don't stay together.

  
I'm the only one
who cares about that, so...

  
- See? I care!
- Carol?

  
You don't care
and just stand there...

  
...and whisper to each other
about me,

  
- like you always do.
- That's true.

  
But I know what I'm doing.

  
Ira, what is it?
- I don't know.

  
Hello.

  
See? This guy gets it.

  
Hey, uh, weird little thing...

  
I like the way you destroy stuff.
Good technique.

  
There's a spark to your work,
that can't be taught.

  
Thanks.

  
Alright, you see that one over there?

  
You get that one,
I'll get this one.

  
- See who can do it faster, okay?
- Okay.

  
Go!

  
What are you doing?
- I... I...

  
- I'm just helping.
- My smashing our houses?

  
- These are your houses?
- Yeah.

  
- What's wrong with them?
- What do your houses look like?

  
- I bet his houses are funny looking.
- Look, we worked very hard on these.

  
Then you, sir, showed up
and started "helping. "

  
- Iím cold.
- Who are you?

  
Are you one of KW's new friends?

  
- Are you Bob or Terry?
- I don't even know who that is.

  
- Looks like a Bob.
- Thing's are getting crazy here.

  
- This thing's dangerous.
- You're scaring me.

  
You know what I say,
if you've got a problem?

  
Eat it!

  
It's the only way to solve
these types of issues.

  
The only way.

  
- Oh, he's probably got those little bird bones.
- Oh, I hate those.

  
You've those little bird bones that
are gonna cut up my mouth, do you?

  
- No, I don't have bird bones.
- You better not!

  
You better not be difficult to eat.
Did you have even think of that?

  
God, you're selfish!

  
I hope you don't taste
as selfish as your look.

  
- Let's eat it.
- Stop!

  
- Stop!
- Oh, look at him.

  
So delectable... so chewable.

  
Be still!

  
- Why?
- Be... because...

  
- Because...
- Why?

  
Well, because...
you can't eat me.

  
You didn't know,
that's why I forgive you.

  
- But never try it again!
- Why not?

  
- I... I've powers from another land.
- Powers?

  
From ancient times.

  
Don't make me show you.

  
- I destroyed these Vikings once.
- Vikings?

  
- What's a Viking?
- Well, they wear horn hats.

  
And they are big.

  
Bigger than all of you.

  
One time they attacked me
in my ice fortress.

  
They tried to cave in the roof.

  
But I made it too strong.

  
I told them to be still,
but they didn't.

  
I conquered them.

  
I had to make their heads explode.

  
And then they realized...

  
...that I knew
all the secrets of the world.

  
And then you know what happened?

  
They made me their king.

  
- A king?
- You were a king?

  
I knew there was something
special about him, I've told you, guys.

  
So wait, you exploded their heads?

  
Oh, come on! Our heads are bigger.

  
You can't explode big heads.

  
No, their heads were
bigger than yours, believe me.

  
- But you're so small.
- Small is good.

  
My powers are able to slip
right through the cracks.

  
And what if the cracks are closed up?

  
Then Iíve a re-cracker
which goes right through that.

  
But what if there's some sort of material
that re-crackers can't get through?

  
Then I've a double re-cracker...

  
...which can get through anything
in this whole universe.

  
And that's end and there's nothing
more powerful after that ever.

  
Period.

  
- He has a double re-cracker.
- He does sound powerful.

  
Yeah! Yeah! But there has
to be some material somewhere.

  
I mean, maybe really
deep underground that...

  
Quiet!

  
- something...
- Be quiet!

  
I'm sorry, so...

  
You were their king...

  
...and you made everything right?

  
Yeah.

  
Well, you know,
what about loneliness?

  
What he's saying is,
will you keep out all the sadness?

  
I have a sadness shield,
it keeps out all the sadness.

  
It's big enough for all of us.

  
And I do this to loneliness.

  
I knew it! I knew it!

  
When he showed up,
I saw it.

  
Why don't guys ever listen to me?

  
You're right, Carol.
I didn't see it.

  
I don't understand.
He doesn't look like a king.

  
If he could be king,
I could be king.

  
Were you the King
where you came from?

  
Yeah. Yeah, for twenty years.

  
- That's impressive!
- That's incredible, right?

  
Looks like we found our king.

  
- You're a king, right?
- Yeah.

  
Yeah, I am.

  
- Oh, I'm so relieved.
- Sorry, we were gonna eat you.

  
We didn't know you were a king.

  
- That was insane!
- Yeah! Yeah, I mean...

  
Oh, my god, it's KW!

  
- What?
- What?

  
Oh, hi, KW!

  
KW, good to see you.

  
I thought you were with your new
best friends, Bob and Terry.

  
What are you guys doing?

  
- Who is that?
- KW, get in here, you gotta hear this.

  
- We finally got a king.
- That's true.

  
- A very impressive one.
- Yeah, KW, we got a king.

  
You and me could go for a walk
and I'll tell you about it, anytime.

  
You can carry me like a little baby.

  
Yeah, anyway I don't know
if I'm sticking around.

  
I just came back to...

  
...to get that one stick I left here.
Anyone see it?

  
I'll help find it, KW.
I'm good at finding sticks.

  
KW, he's very powerful.
- Stop, stop, don't push her.

  
She'll figure it out for herself.
Just leave her be, okay?

  
King.
King, this way your Majesty, please.

  
Look. He's gonna make us happy, Judy.

  
Yeah.

  
But happiness isn't always
the best way to be happy.

  
- Judith, stop.
- He's small for a king.

  
- Am I nuts? He's small.
- Yeah, that's what I said.

  
- Alexander!
- Sorry!

  
I like it better
when we have a king.

  
I like Carol better
when we have a king.

  
Hey, what happened to our houses?

  
They fell down.

  
Are those... other kings?

  
They were here before we got here.
I never saw them.

  
I've never even... noticed them.

  
You okay?

  
Yeah.

  
You are now the king.

  
And you'll be a truly great king.

  
Oh, look at...
Looks good on him. Look!

  
- He looks great. Our king!
- He looks perfect!

  
- He looks perfect!
- We have a king.

  
First king!

  
First king!

  
King! King! King!

  
Hey King!
What's your first order of business?

  
Let the wild rumpus start!

  
Perfect answer!

  
Come on!

  
Come on, King.

  
Come on, KW,
believe me.

  
Guys, follow me.

  
What?

  
You're funny looking.
That's all.

  
Hey, king, king, king!
Watch this!

  
Hey, jumping guy!
Jumping guy!

  
Hey, mister!

  
Wait up!

  
Hey, jumping guy! Hey!

  
Hey, king, watch this!

  
Alright, tree, let's settle this later.

  
Look, everyone wants to be
friends with the new guy.

  
Well, this is our family.

  
I hope you can see how excited
they're to have a king.

  
Sometimes they have an odd way
of showing it, I mean...

  
They act weird, you know?
And...

  
It hurt other people's feelings.

  
Ira, my love? Come here.
- What?

  
Oh, that's just Judith and Ira,
they are in love.

  
What are you thinking?

  
Watch me! Look!

  
That's Alexander.

  
Look, I hate this tree.

  
Oh, he just wants attention.
Don't give him the satisfaction.

  
Seventy seven!

  
Seventy eight!

  
No, wait.
No, no, that was...

  
That's Douglas.

  
I count on him for everything.

  
If I was stranded on a desert island
and I could only take one thing..

  
...it would be Douglas.

  
- We can share him if you want?
- Yeah, he's good.

  
I might need one of those.

  
Douglas, no!
No, no, Stop!

  
That's not the way I want you to do it.
Here, I'll show you.

  
How did that happen?

  
It's an accident.
I don't know how that happened.

  
We haven't formally met.

  
I'm Ira.

  
I put the holes in the trees,
maybe you saw those?

  
Or maybe not.

  
Anyways... it's what I do.

  
They aren't really important like...

  
...things you do.

  
Oh, and this is Judith.

  
You don't really need to know me.
I'm kind of a downer.

  
King, that's not true.

  
Hey, let me see your face.

  
You can introduce me
to the king if you want...

  
Here, let me see your face.

  
Oh, what's that?
Don't worry, let me see it.

  
Good shot, Douglas.

  
You almost got me!
Almost got me!

  
We'll get him next time, won't we?
Yes, we will.

  
Hey, what are you doing?

  
Is she the one you're mad at
when you're smashing stuff?

  
Yeah.

  
No, no! No...

  
I thought she said,
she wasn't gonna come back.

  
- Well, looks like she's back now.
- Yeah.

  
Yeah, I hope so.

  
I'm gonna get her!

  
Don't, don't, she doesn't like
that kind of thing.

  
Come back!
Come back, here!

  
Ira, my dear, come here.

  
- Hey, king!
- King, I wouldn't recommed that.

  
Stop it!

  
Hey, stop it.

  
Go, pick someone else's nose.

  
Max, look out!

  
Gotcha!

  
Alexander, get over there
and be social.

  
Let's be like this forever!

  
This is really me.

  
He's started things off right,
our king.

  
- Well, this guy get things done.
- Yeah.

  
- That was great.
- Yeah, that was.

  
That was fun!

  
- We forgot how to have fun.
- That's true, Carol.

  
- Even I didn't.
- No, no, you didn't, Carol.

  
KW, your toe's are in my ear.

  
Good, you're keeping it warm.

  
- Hey, who's on my face?
- Oh, I'm sorry, Carol.

  
Let me move.

  
Oh, I like this.

  
- Let's be like this forever.
- The king having a problem?

  
My footís stuck under this fat guy.

  
There.

  
Thanks.

  
- I'm KW.
- I'm Max.

  
I know.

  
Hey, so are you gonna stay?

  
- Well... it's complicated.
- They all want you to.

  
I don't even know
how everything got this way.

  
Things seem better now, though.

  
Yeah, well, they are.

  
Okay, King.

  
Hey, who are Bob and Terry?

  
They're really good friends of mine.

  
No, I don't even know how to
describe them, they're just...

  
...different from everybody here.

  
It's just different.

  
- Well, do you like them more than...
- You ask lot of questions.

  
So what's your story?
Why did you come here?

  
Well... I'm an explorer,
and I travel a lot.

  
- And... I travel by sea...
- Right.

  
I used to travel by air.

  
So obviously,
you have no home or family?

  
I have one of those but...

  
- Did you ate them all?
- No!

  
No, I just bit one of them,
that's all and...

  
...they went crazy.

  
And...

  
I don't like frozen corn.

  
I'm sorry.
That's why you left?

  
They act like I'm a bad person.

  
- Well, are you?
- I don't know.

  
I don't know.

  
Well, I'm glad you came.

  
It'll be good to have someone around
who doesn't eat everybody.

  
I mean, you just bite everyone,
the biters aren't so bad.

  
Eaters are the one's that
I just can't stand.

  
I have no plans to eat anybody.

  
Alright... good.

  
Good night.

  
Good night, KW.
- Good night.

  
- Good night, Ira.
- Good night.

  
- Good night, Douglas.
- Good night, Carol.

  
- Good night, Judith.
- Good night.

  
- Good night, Judy.
- Good night, darling.

  
- Good night.
- Good night, Alex.

  
- Good night, King.
- Good night.

  
- Oh, good night, King.
- Hey, good night, King.

  
Oh, this is nice.

  
Good night, everybody.

  
Everybody, sweet dreams.

  
I didn't want to wake you up.

  
But I really want to
show you something.

  
- Okay.
- And on the way...

  
I can show you your kingdom.

  
This is all yours.

  
You are the owner of this world.

  
Everything you see is yours.

  
Oh, except...

  
...that hole over there,
that's Ira's.

  
I mean, the tree is yours
but the hole is Ira's.

  
But everything else is yours.

  
Except that rock over there,
that's not yours.

  
That little rock next to the big rock.

  
But everything else in the kingdom,
except for that stick...

  
...that little stick right there,
that's not yours.

  
I want you to be king forever, Max.

  
Yeah... definitely.

  
This part of your kingdom
is not so good.

  
Why?

  
Well, look, this used to be all rock,
and now it's sand...

  
...and then one day
it's gonna be dust.

  
And then the whole island
will be dust and...

  
Then I don't even know
what comes after dust.

  
Carol?
- Hm-hmm.

  
Did you know the sun
was gonna die?

  
What?

  
I've never heard that.

  
Oh, come on...

  
...that can't happen.

  
You're the king.
And look at me... I'm big.

  
How could guys like us worry about
a tiny thing like the sun, hm?

  
Carol, what's that?
- Oh, it's that dog.

  
Don't feed it,
it'll just follow you around.

  
Carol, wait up for me!

  
∂ Hideaway ∂

  
∂ Well they'll seat us in the sun ∂

  
∂ By the way ∂

  
∂ Know you've always been the one ∂

  
Did you make this?

  
Yeah. Yeah.

  
It's very good.

  
We were gonna make
a whole world like this, but...

  
Everyone used to come here...

  
But now..

  
Do you know what it feels like
when all your teeth are...

  
...falling out really slowly and...

  
...you don't realize and
then you notice that...

  
...well, they're really far apart.

  
And then one day...

  
...you don't have any teeth anymore.

  
- Yeah.
- Well, it was like that.

  
Alright, put...
put your head right here.

  
Right here.

  
Alright, now watch.

  
I wish I could live in there.

  
Yeah.

  
It's gonna be a place where only
the things you want to have happen...

  
...would happen.

  
Yeah.

  
I guess it does not gonna happen,
I'll just...

  
...probably end up eating my feet off.

  
Carol, we can totally
build a place like that.

  
- Really?
- We're gonna start with the perfect fort.

  
And then we're gonna
build the city around it.

  
Because, we gotta be realistic,
I mean...

  
We need to start
with the perfect fort...

  
...and then we're gonna
build the underground complex,

  
...that's gonna tie everything together.

  
I like your brain, Max.

  
Hey, I'm not gonna
eat off my feet anymore.

  
- Why?
- Max is gonna build a fortress.

  
Yeah, it's gonna be as tall as
twelve of you and six of me.

  
And only we can get in.
We can make an ice cream parlor.

  
A swimming pool with a bottom
that's a trampoline!

  
Hey, where were you?
We... we were just here.

  
And anyone who gets in there,
that we don't want there...

  
...will get their brains cut out.

  
- The building will do it automatically.
- How does it know which brains to cut off?

  
Okay, so there will be a tree,

  
...but it's a fake tree,
that's a tunnel.

  
So anyways, it's not a tree.
It's a tunnel.

  
And it will lead you into the fort
through a compartment.

  
Ira, do you wanna be
in charge of the tunnels?

  
- Because you can make great holes.
- Wow! Wow!

  
- I don't want my brains cut out!
- This fort is already making me happy.

  
Does anybody ever hear me?

  
We'll take care for each other,
and we'll all sleep together in a real pile.

  
What do you think?

  
I don't think anything like this
ever works, really.

  
- But if it did...
- Fine.

  
I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know anything.

  
But I do like sleeping in a real pile.

  
Carol, will you be
in charge of building it?

  
You should definitely be in charge, Carol.

  
- You're the only one who can pull it off.
- Yeah, well, you're right but, uh...

  
KW, don't you think that
Carol should build it?

  
Yeah, he's the only one who can.

  
I'll build it if he doesn't want.

  
- Wow... you really want to do this?
- Yeah.

  
- I think it's a perfect idea.
- Well...

  
Alright, if you want to do it then...

  
You want me...

  
I would be honored.

  
- Judy, you would have been good too.
- Yeah.

  
We gotta put the doorway up here.

  
A little more that way.
A little more.

  
Yeah, right there.

  
∂ Big fun ∂

  
∂ No sleep ∂

  
∂ Faces ∂

  
∂ Face me ∂

  
∂ Come on! Save me ∂

  
∂ Hold on ∂

  
∂ Grow ∂

  
∂ All is love,
is love, is love ∂

  
How about here?
You like it here?

  
Yeah, one more up there,
one more up there...

  
...and then we can have
the other mark over there.

  
Yeah. A little more this way.

  
Thatís five, Carol.

  
And then seven Douglases across
we'll have the other mark.

  
- What you've been eating?
- Rocks.

  
Rocks? What did I tell you
about eating rocks?

  
- That's six.
- You're getting a little paunch.

  
I know.

  
Hey, KW.
- Hey, King.

  
How about here?

  
It needs seven Douglas's.
No more and no less.

  
- Seven chubby Douglases.
- Hey, Carol!

  
It's gonna be part castle, part fort,
part mountain, and part ship.

  
We'll have a laboratory,

  
...so we could build robots
to do stuff for us.

  
Our private detective agency,

  
and... and our own language.

  
And we'll make a machine
that can take our legs off...

  
...and that way we can float.

  
Alright, Carol!

  
You smiled.

  
You can't deny that
this is a good idea.

  
I didn't deny it.

  
I believe part of that idea was mine.

  
What part?

  
The part where I said,
'Yeah, good idea. "

  
I got it!

  
I got it.

  
Judith, that tickles.

  
I like the tunnel, Ira.
- Oh!

  
Impressive!

  
Why, thank you, King.

  
Great beams, Douglas.

  
Strong.

  
Thanks. They're just
the standard beams I always do.

  
What were you doing
with Carol just now?

  
Just talking.

  
Oh, a secret, huh?

  
Well let me ask you something.
How does it work around here?

  
Are we all the same,
or are some of us better than others?

  
You like to play favorites, huh, King?

  
No. I like all you guys equally.

  
Don't give me that.
I can see how it is.

  
The King has a favorites,
that's really cute.

  
Stop!

  
Do you have a favorite color?

  
Hey, can I be your favorite color?

  
You know what?

  
You can't do that back to me.

  
If we're upset, your job is
not to get upset back at us.

  
Our job is to be upset.

  
If I get mad and wanna eat you,
then you have to say,

  
"Oh, okay! You can eat me!
I love you!"

  
"Whatever makes you happy, Judith. "

  
That's what you're supposed to do.

  
Come on, Max.
Let's go get those sticks.

  
Yeah... okay.

  
I hope you heard me, King.

  
Yeah, he heard you, Judith.
Everyone always hears you.

  
You think you have power, K.W.?
That's not real power.

  
I'm talking to you!

  
No! Not you!
I'm still talking to K.W.!

  
Don't worry about Judith.
She's...

  
...a downer.

  
Now you figure it out.

  
Hey, you should talk to
Bob and Terry about it.

  
Come on!

  
King!

  
Seriously, they're really smart.

  
They have the answers to everything.

  
Hold on. Hold on.
I'm coming!

  
Well, what do you think?

  
This is Bob and Terry.

  
They love it, when I do this to them.

  
Bob, Terry, this is Max...

  
...he's the biter
I was telling you about.

  
Say hi.

  
Hi.

  
He wanted to ask you guys
some advice.

  
Go ahead, they're not judgmental.

  
You mean just ask them?

  
Yeah.

  
They say it's better for you...

  
...if you can ask the question
in seven words.

  
Okay...

  
How.

  
Do.

  
I. Make.

  
Everyone.

  
O. Kay.

  
Oh, yeah.
I didn't think of that.

  
Wow, they really get to the heart
of it, don't they?

  
Aren't they great?

  
What if they came and
lived with us?

  
Bob, Terry, why don't you
come live with us?

  
We're building something great!

  
Oh, good!
Right, Max?

  
What about Carol?

  
He's Carol.

  
I can like him and still be friends
with Bob and Terry.

  
∂ Heads up! Heads up!
Heads up! ∂

  
∂ You hold me up
You hold me down ∂

  
∂ Not talking about a holiday ∂

  
∂ Pretend my feet are running away ∂

  
∂ Well, if my feet don't touch the ground ∂

  
Hey, Douglas!

  
Hey, where's Carol?

  
He's in the fort.
Aft section, main chamber.

  
Carol! Carol!
The fort looks great!

  
Yeah, thanks, we were all working
really hard on it.

  
- Where have you been?
- Well... I...

  
K.W. took me to see her friends
Bob and Terry.

  
They really wanna meet you.
They may even stay over.

  
Oh, this is the famous Bob and Terry?

  
What? K.W. told you about me?

  
- Hey, guys.
- What did she say?

  
Really?

  
Precious little Bob and Terry
get carried.

  
Excuse me, my voice?
Oh, thank you!

  
Well, thank you.
You know, sometimes I...

  
I know. I know.
I'm a very lucky man.

  
Hey, do you guys know any jokes?

  
Who's there?

  
Loud interrupting cow...

  
That's hilarious!

  
They're amazing, K.W.

  
Max, what's wrong with the fort?

  
I thought you said
it would be automatic.

  
What?

  
I thought you said if anybody
got in here we didn't want,

  
...the fort would automatically
cut their brains out.

  
Carol?

  
Oh, well...

  
I thought that then, but...

  
I kinda decided that if we know them,
they should keep their brains.

  
Even if we don't know them
that well...

  
I think you should apologize
to Bob and Terry.

  
I don't apologize to owls.

  
Owls are stupid!

  
Carol, that's hateful.

  
Why did you bring them here?

  
This place was supposed to be for us!

  
They're not sleeping in our pile!

  
Gee, you're the best king ever.

  
You've changed everything.

  
Hey, Carol.

  
I don't get
why she likes them so much.

  
And I couldn't even understand
what they were saying...

  
...all I heard was squeaking.

  
I couldn't really understand
what they were saying either.

  
- Really?
- Yeah.

  
Now everybodyís mad at me.

  
Is there anything you can do to...

  
You know...

  
There's something I like to do,
that sometimes makes me feel better.

  
What is it?

  
Okay, we're gonna have a war!

  
And we are gonna completely
clobber each other!

  
- Clobber each other?
- Yeah, with huge dirt clods.

  
I used to do it a ton
when I was a little kid.

  
Yeah, we haven't had a
dirt clod fight in a long time...

  
Yeah, it's the best way
to have a fun together.

  
Yeah, life was simpler back then,
with the dirt clods.

  
- Yeah.
- So who wants to be a bad guy?

  
Okay. I'll pick one then.

  
- Okay you're a bad guy.
- Yeah, saw that coming.

  
And then...
you're definitely a bad guy.

  
- What? Damn.
- And you can pick one other.

  
I'm bad... really.

  
- Okay. We pick you.
- No.

  
No, I can't be a bad guy.
I'm the king.

  
I'm a good guy.

  
I'm a bad guy! I'm a bad guy!

  
- Okay. You can be a bad guy.
- I'm a bad guy!

  
- Judy, I'm with you.
- Yeah. I heard.

  
And you...

  
- He's with you.
- Am I a good guy?

  
Yes, of course,
you have the best arm.

  
Hey, where were you?

  
I was just making sure,
Bob and Terry still have their brains.

  
- K.W.!
- They do.

  
Hey K.W.,
you wanna be on my team?

  
- We're the bad guys.
- No, no... no, no.

  
You're with us.
You're a good guy.

  
Hey, come on.
K.W., be a good guy.

  
Okay.
So, you're on my team.

  
You and me and Carol.

  
Hi, K.W.

  
So what we are gonna do is
we're gonna try to kill the bad guys...

  
...by beaning them in the head
with these dirt clods.

  
We're gonna try to find
the biggest pieces...

  
You didn't see that coming!

  
- Run!
- Yeah. You'd better run!

  
Hey, wait! We didn't make
the official starting noise!

  
Alright, come on!

  
Look out for the bad guys!

  
We got them pinned down!
They can't even move!

  
- Fire on three!
- Okay!

  
One, two, three!

  
You guys are gonna...

  
Wait, wait... wait, wait!
I have an idea!

  
Come out!

  
No!

  
Why not?

  
Because you're gonna hit us
in the head with dirt.

  
Come out!

  
No!

  
Why not?

  
Because when I said you were gonna
hit us in the head with dirt,

  
...you didn't say anything.

  
That means you're planning to hit us
in the head with dirt.

  
Man, they really have us figured out.

  
Yeah.

  
Okay! Let's go!

  
Charge!

  
Come on!

  
Ira, help! Get Carol.

  
Oh, good shot.
I'm gonna get you!

  
Hey, who threw Richard?

  
Well, he's on our team now.

  
- Gotcha!
- No animals!

  
It really hurts. It's hurting!

  
- Yeah!
- Hold!

  
- Hey, Douglas. Get the goat.
- Okay.

  
- Knock his legs out!
- I got it.

  
That's cheating.
I'm not gonna play anymore.

  
- Alexander, come on!
- Do it again.

  
- Okay.
- Fight with us!

  
That's... That's not fair.

  
- Are you crazy?
- You're supposed to get hit, it's a war.

  
That wasn't fair.
Douglas hit me when I was hurt.

  
You can't hit someone,
when they're hurt.

  
- I quit.
- Get back in here right now.

  
Alex! Count to ten.

  
- Things will be better.
- Alexander, don't you cry!

  
If I count to ten then
you'll be gone, Ira?

  
- Don't you dare talk to Ira the way I do!
- Knock it off!

  
That's my eye!

  
Come on!

  
Look out! Duck!

  
Yeah!

  
Oh, Carol, I'm sorry.

  
What happened?
Somebody stepped on your head?

  
What are you doing?

  
What?

  
You stepped on my head!

  
What do you mean?
It's a war!

  
Douglas just did it.

  
Yeah, but he did it by accident.
You did it on purpose!

  
And he didn't step on
the face part of my head!

  
It was a joke.

  
I was just joking.

  
Sure you were.

  
Like you aren't always looking for
the opportunity to step on my head.

  
Because that's what you do.

  
Fine, fine.
You know what?

  
This is exactly why I don't ever wanna
do anything with you anymore.

  
Go ahead.

  
Step on my head.

  
No. Forget it. I'm not going
to step on your head...

  
...just to make you feel better.

  
Let's go, Douglas.

  
Carol, I think you did
the right thing...

  
...you know,
not stepping on her head.

  
Thanks, Max. But I'm done.

  
I don't know,
why I came back here.

  
I'm glad I met you, I guess.

  
So King. What's going on?

  
This is how you rule a kingdom?
Everyone fighting?

  
The bad guys feel bad.
Everyone feels bad.

  
Yeah. I'm still sorta dizzy
and my eyeballs feel loose.

  
Oh, can it, Ira?
Everyone's eyeballs feel loose.

  
No!

  
Max will bring K.W. back.

  
He'll keep us all together.

  
He has powers. He told us.

  
Right, Max?

  
Show us.

  
Oh, somebody broke the king.

  
I don't get it.

  
Oh, wait, I do.
It's stupid.

  
I think he's done now.

  
That's what we waited for?

  
Carol?

  
Hi.

  
Is that from the dirt clods?

  
Yeah.

  
It's from when you had
Douglas hit me.

  
I'm sorry about that.

  
It's okay.

  
No one really listens to you, huh?

  
Oh, you've noticed.

  
Yeah. I guess you're not...

  
...used to that being a king and all.

  
I really messed this place up.

  
Youíre not really a king, huh?

  
You're just regular.

  
I knew it.

  
I don't even know
if there's such a thing as...

  
...a king who can do
all the things you said.

  
Look...

  
I don't care.

  
Just don't ever let Carol find out.

  
Why did you leave us?

  
Hey, Max.

  
What's that?

  
Well, I was thinking
we needed a place...

  
...where the king is secret.

  
Like a...
Like a secret chamber for the king.

  
Well, I don't understand... What...

  
Well, you know like a...
like a small place.

  
With a door that's not so big.

  
I don't know...

  
I didn't picture it with
a secret doors.

  
What if it were a big place
with big secret doors?

  
That... That's not really
how it would be done.

  
It's more like... it's like a...

  
About that big?

  
Everybody, get out here!

  
Wake up!

  
Everybody wake up!

  
And get out here!

  
- Ira, what is that?
- Everybody wake up!

  
It's Carol.

  
I knew this was gonna happen.

  
It's all wrong.

  
It wasn't supposed
to be like this.

  
Judith, what's happening right now?

  
Judith?

  
Wake up and come out here.

  
What is it?

  
- Get out here!
- What's he talking about?

  
It's wrong!

  
I can't even look at it.

  
- What is it?
- The fort.

  
- We gotta tear the fort down.
- What?

  
- It wasn't supposed to be like this!
- No, Carol.

  
You said we were all going to
sleep together in a real pile,

  
...and now you want a secret room...

  
...and K.W. is gone for good.

  
And now I have to worry
if the sun is gonna die.

  
- The sun?
- Look at it. It didn't come up!

  
- It's dead.
- What?

  
- Oh, my God!
- Dead!

  
- Carol, stop!
- It's dead! It's dead.

  
- You're scaring everybody.
- It's morning.

  
The sun's not dead.
It's just nighttime.

  
How do you know?
I can't trust what you say.

  
Everything keeps changing.

  
Alright, come on, Douglas.
We're ripping it down.

  
Carol, we're not ripping the fort down!

  
It was supposed to be a place...

  
...where only things you wanted
to have happen would happen.

  
Come on, Douglas,
do what I tell you.

  
No! We all live here,
not just you.

  
It's everybody's.
It's Judith and Ira and everybody.

  
Oh, finally!

  
You were supposed
to keep us safe.

  
You were supposed to take
care of us, and you didn't.

  
- Carol?
- I'm sorry!

  
- That's not good enough.
- Carol?

  
You're a terrible King!

  
- Carol!
- What?

  
He is not our King.

  
What?

  
Don't say that.

  
How could you say that?
Don't you dare say that.

  
There's no such thing as a king.

  
Don't you say that!

  
He's just a boy...

  
...pretending to be a wolf
pretending to be a king.

  
- That's not true!
- He's just like us.

  
- Why don't I listen to myself?
- No! No!

  
That's not true!

  
Look, I just went along with it because
I knew you wanted it so much.

  
- Don't say that!
- No! Carol, stop it!

  
Stop it!
What are you doing?

  
- Carol!
- What?

  
- That was my favorite arm.
- Well, I was just holding on to it.

  
- You pulled away.
- What?

  
- Carol, stop it!
- You lied!

  
- You're out of control!
- I'm not out of control!

  
You were supposed to take
care of us. You promised.

  
I'll eat you up!

  
Come back here!

  
Carol!

  
Max!

  
Max!

  
Come on. Come here.

  
Get in, get inside!

  
Get in. Crawl inside my mouth.
I'll hide you!

  
- Hi, Richard.
- Max!

  
- Where is he?
- I don't know!

  
- Where is he?
- I don't know!

  
I can smell him!

  
I just want to talk to him.

  
- You're out of control!
- I'm not out of control!

  
- You were gonna eat him!
- No, no... I want...

  
I wasn't gonna...

  
I donít know... I just said it.

  
Am I as bad as he says I am?

  
Just go away.

  
I just wanted us all to be together...

  
Can you believe him?

  
He doesn't mean to be that way, K.W.

  
He's just scared.

  
Well, he only makes it harder.

  
And it's hard enough already.

  
But he loves you.

  
You're his family.

  
Yeah.

  
It's hard being a family.

  
I can't breathe that well in here.

  
Can you get me out?

  
I wish you guys had a mom.

  
I'm gonna go home.

  
Carol!

  
Max.

  
Well...

  
Yeah.

  
Yeah.

  
So whatever happened with you
and the Vikings?

  
Well, in the end, I...

  
...had to leave.

  
Why?

  
I'm not a Viking or a king or...

  
...or anything.

  
So what are you?

  
I'm Max.

  
Well, that's not very much, is it?

  
Hey, Max?

  
Yeah?

  
When you go home will you say
good things about us?

  
Yeah. Bye, Bull.

  
Thanks, Max.

  
You're the first king
we haven't eaten.

  
Yeah, that's true.

  
See ya.

  
Bye, Max.

  
Bye.

  
Don't go.

  
I'll eat you up, I love you so.




Special thanks to SergeiK.