Casino Royale Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Casino Royale script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the James Bond movie. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Casino Royale. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

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Casino Royale Script



Mr Bond?






I'm Lieutenant Mathis

of the Special Police.



These are my credentials.



They appear to be in order.



Come with me.



They used to say a good spy

is a pure spy, inside and out.



Roses, Tanagra figurines and Debussy.



He plays Debussy every afternoon



from sunset until it's too dark

to read the music.



Stands on his head a lot, eats royal jelly.



Lets his intestines down

and washes them by hand.



Something he learned

during his sojourn in Tibet.



M, what gives?



I forgot to mention lions.



- Lions and more lions.

- We're surrounded by lions.



I did not come here

to be devoured by symbols of monarchy!



I warn you, M, if this is a trap...



Calm yourselves, gentlemen.

It's no trap, I assure you.



The lions are only curious.

He has few visitors.



That I can believe.



A veritable Eden, is it not, gentlemen?



Eden without an Eve is an absurdity.



A good spy is a pure spy.



Not good. Great.



The greatest spy in history, gentlemen.



The true, one and only,

original James Bond.



- The gentlemen are here, Sir James.

- Thank you.



- My dear Bond.

- My dear M.



Ransome, CIA, Sir James.



J-Junior cipher c-clerk in m-my day,

weren't you, Ransome?



Yes, sir. JCC, class G, SIC to SCCT.

CIA, Washington DC.



Smernov, KGB, Sir James.



Ah, yes. L-Labour camp inspector.



Ikon     GPU, Siberian sector.



I remember your ch-chap Lenin very well.



First-class organiseft us

we were a small service,



under-financed, ludicrously ill-equipped.



It was essential

that your legend be maintained.



Without a James Bond    

no one would have respected us.



Him and his wretched g-gadgets.



We must make use

of the weapons of our time.



So I observe.



You, Ransome, with your trick carnation

that s-spits cyanide.



You ought to be ashamed.



The Russians started it.



And you, Smernov, with an armoury

concealed in your grotesque boots.



Listen to them tinkle.



And you, Le Grand, with a different

deadly poison in each of your fly buttons.



And you, M,

with your flame-throwing fountain pens.



Y-Y-You're joke-shop spies, gentlemen.



We are in the last half

of the   th century, Sir James.



- Even you have to face it.

- Why should l, when I can face that?



Look at my garden.

Out there, there is a black rose.



Not dark red, but black.



As a raven's wing at midnight.



I would not exchange one single petal

for anything your world has to offer,



including an Aston M-Martin

with lethal accessories.



You have only contempt for

the proletariat, Sir James. This we know.



If I didn't know better, I'd say

you'd lost your faith in democracy.



You can break the glass,

but you can't hold back the weather.



Things are bad. I've lost    agents in the

last fortnight - seven killed, four missing.



- Is my namesake among them?

- He may well be tomorrow.



Eight of ours were given the works -

two in the Pentagon.



-   .

- KGB is depleted.



I cannot disclose exact figures.



The enemy has penetrated

our most secret inner circles.



- He reads our very mind.

- For all we know,



he has his eye on us now.



Are you quite sure

he is not one or m-more of you?



- No, no.

- Absolutely sure.



Until this danger is past, we must

stand united in the defence of all spies,



great or small, regardless of nationality.



Calamity makes strange b-bedfellows,

but why, in the strength of your unity,



do you disturb a gentleman

in his retirement?



We need your inspirational leadership.

in front of a firing squad.



He really loved that woman.



Well, James?



I'm sorry, old man,

but what you ask is quite impossible.



Perhaps this will change your decision.



My record speaks my loyalty.

But no, not even for her, McTarry.



Sorry, James.



There's McTarry's signal. Stand by.



- Zero.

- On.



- Fire!

- Fire!



Up    !



- Authority to Control.

- Go ahead.



Proceed with Smersh Plan B.



Sir James Bond is back, with his morals,

his vows, and his celibate image.



We must destroy that image.



Riverbank to Control.



- Go ahead.

- The target has just entered Scotland.



- M's castle to Control.

- M's name is McTarry. Use it.



Plan B in operation.



McTarry Castle completely occupied,

with only one change.



Agent Mimi is now M's widow.



Agent Mimi impersonating Lady Fiona?



Well, she has the best Scots accent.



And that's all that's left of the McTarry.



Your husband d-died as he lived,

Lady Fiona. In the service of Her Majesty.



I thought it would be

my p-painful duty to impart the news.



How did you know your husband M -

I'm sorry, McTarry - was dead?



- We were told.

- Might I ask who told you?



- The Grey Piper.

- The who?



Tell Sir James about the Grey Piper, lass.



Whenever a McTarry dies,



he comes down from the mountain,

over the loch and through the heather,



playing the clan lament.



We always put a tappit-hen of

usquebaugh outside the castle door.



- Tappit-hen?

- A quart o' whisky.



- Is he a real p-piper?

- We dinna ken.



But it's been the same one for     years.



- Naught else remains?

- Nothing to s-speak of, I'm afraid.



It was found in a tree,

    yards from where he stood.



Took off, as it were, and flew like a b-bird.



But whether it is an article of apparel



or an anatomical f-feature,

that is the question.



Should it be given Christian burial?

Just how p-personal is a toupee?



It can only be regarded as a "hairloom".



Eliza, put it wi'

all the other relics of McTarry glory.



We all ken that

our beloved McTarry of the Glen



was a different man in Whitehall.



But McTarry women never ask questions.



According to clan tradition,

when the laird dies



a black he-goat must be ta'en alive

off Ben Tarry by six barefoot virgins.



I myself slaughter it.



The daughters wrest the stomach out,

and stuff it wi' entrails.



Bright entrails.



Sear it, boil it, and serve it up.



And eat it?



- Warm reekin'.

- Sounds d-delicious.



We start feastin' at midnight,

washin' the haggis down wi' usquebaugh.



One gies strength to the limbs,

the other fire to the blood for dancin'.



- Dancing?

- The McTarry funeral fling.



"Argar, argar garar goru argar" it goes.



- Most m-moving.

- Ah, we dance till we fall in our tracks.



And after an hour's repose,

the piper wakes us



to the tune o' "Awa' to the Grouse"



and awa' we go

to the memorial grouse shoot.



B-But surely the grouse

are not in season?



Whenever a McTarry dies,

the grouse come into season.



I'm Heather.



I'm Meg. Your bath's ready, Sir James.



- Thank you.

- At the end of the passage.



- Very kind of you.

- Let us help you out o' your duddies.



- No, thank you. I can manage m-my...

- We always helped Daddy.



How many of you are there?

D-Daughters, I mean.



-    in all.

-   ? M-My word.



And how do the ages run?



Who is the... How young is the youngest?



-   .

- And the eldest?






You mean there are only...?

That's my loose kneecap.



There are only three years

between all    of you?



Some of us are adopted daughters.



I see. Steady.



- Are there any m-men in the house?

- Nane but the pipers.



My daddy only liked the lassies.



Your d-daddy really was

a d-different man in Whitehall.



I'm testing the temperature of the water



as I always did for my daddy.



He used to call me his little thermometer.



Well? Get in.



- Get in?

- Get in!



You're sure I'm not c-crowding you?



Get in.



Do you like your back scrubbed?



Thank you.



- What is your n-name, my dear?

- Buttercup.



- How old are you?

-   .



- Do you go to school?

- Daddy taught us.



There. You're as sleek as a baby.



Now, turn round.



What form are you in?



Can ye nae judge that

for yourself, Sir James?



- What is your favourite subject?

- Anatomy.



That's your mediastinum.



That's your

orbicularis oris.



That's your Azygos vein.



That's your articular cartilage,

and those are your synovial membranes.



- Right, right.

- It's getting gey cold!



- Quite.

- My daddy liked it hotter.



I am not your d-da... Quite.



Thank you.



- To the laird!

- To the laird!



To your right, Sir James - Lady Mary,

daughter of Lord Douglas McTarry,



raped by the Campbells in     .



In retaliation of which,



Lord Douglas sent his only son Hamish

out to rape twa Campbell lassies.



- At the same t-time?

- Eldest first, of course.



As prescribed by scripture.

The youngest bore him triplets.



Their union being

thus bounteously blessed,



a contract of marriage was entered into



which brought the McTarrys Black Loch,

Ben Torn, the Shags of Raugh,



Glen Noch,

and a good stretch of salmon water.



All the best.



I say, does she...?



Good night, ladies.



Sleep I've had nane

for thinkin' on my dearie.



All the long night I walk, grovellin' in grief.



Comfort me, Jamie lad.



Gie me your bosom to weep on.



- Doudle me, Jamie.

- Really, madam!



I hereby claim my widow's due

according to McTarry tradition.



Let me be comforted.



Doudle me!



A quaint custom, but one more honoured

in the breach than in the observance.



Then you'll have to pay the piper!



The p-piper?



You heard me,

you mean-mou'd, ill-willie cuif!



You'll have to pay the piper!



Robin! Jock!






You've been challenged to warsle

with Sir James.



He wants to warsle.



I haven't warsled for years.

I may be a little out of p-practice.



Play ball!










Splendide! Bravo!



Magnifique. Mais...



Surprising how quickly it all comes back.



Ah, well. A little b-beauty sleep

before the grouse shoot, perhaps?



Beaters, follow Marie over to the butts.



Eliza, stay here with me

for the countdown.



Oh, my love is like a red, red rose



that's newly sprung in June.



- Fire, Mission.

- Roger.



- Fuse alarm missiles.

- Roger.



- Supercharge.

- Roger.






The button!



The button!



The button!



- Oh, beloved!

- Good of you to join me.



- The button! The button!

- She's with him.



Magnetic! Homing device!



- Which button is it? Let me look!

- There's a knife in my pocket.



- See!

- Take off my braces.



My braces.



And now, madam, if you'd be

kind enough to furnish a few answers.



Our orders were to corrupt you,

to befoul your image of yourself.



Failing that, we were to kill you.



- I see.

- Look! They've found the button.



- Who g-gave you these orders?

- Authority.



International Mothers' Help, East Berlin.



Jolly good sport, what?



You're wounded.



'Tis but a thimbleful.



But heart's blood.



Farewell, Jamie.



My dear.



Again. Say it again.



James Bond, my jo James.



James Bond, my jo.



My dear.



One more request.



The last.



Think of me

as the second woman in your life.



The one after Mata Hari.



Kiss me, Jamie.



Kiss me goodbye.



Madam! Are you quite sure you're dying?



Not dying, but giving up my life.



I'm going to another world.



There's a convent over that hill.



Bond leaving Scotland now.

Instructions understood.



Jag to Dairy. Contact in position.



- Get ready to delivermilk.

- Dairy to Jag. Understood.



- Stand by, Remote Control.

- Remote control ready.



Speed ready. Distance ready.



- Start milk float.

- Contact.



- Distance    yards.

- Accelerating.



- Prime detonators.

- Check.



- Gap has widened.

-    yards.



- Retract detonators.

- Check.



- Hold it. He's too close.

- Dropping speed.



Ignore Jag. Increase speed.



- Distance gauge failing.

- Vision failing. No vision.



Switch to automatic control.

Hello, Jag. Are you receiving me?



Drop speed. I'm in direct line.



Jag to Dairy. Drop speed now!



Hello, Jag. Come in, Jag.



- Detonators out.

- Out.



Good Lord! Moneypenny.

You haven't changed a bit.




I'm Miss Moneypenny's daughter.



- How is your dear mother?

- After you left, she took the vows.



That seems to be

the in thing to do these days.



I must say, this place

brings back a few memories.



Yes, Mother told me some of them.



She probably also told you that I'm partial

to jasmine tea. Lapsang Souchong.



By the way, since I came in here

have you noticed me stammer?



- No, sir.

- Let me know if I do.



I haven't got time for that now.



- Will you be needing me tonight, sir?

- Very probably.



If I'm to take over this department,

I have to know all M's secrets.



Not his personal ones, of course.



- May I say welcome back, Sir James.

- Thank you...



- Hadley, sir.

- Of course. You were...



- My father's son, sir.

- And where is your dear father now?



- The same place, sir.

- That's encouraging.



Bring me up to date.

Who's on what assignment?



- It's not a happy picture.

- Why the black flags?



They've been liquidated, I'm afraid.



Finland - stabbed to death

in a ladies' sauna bath, sir.



Madrid - burnt in a blazing bordello, sir.



And Tokyo, sir -

garrotted in a geisha house.



It's depressing that "secret agent" has

become synonymous with "sex maniac".



- Incidentally, where is my namesake?

- We had to take him off the board, sir.



He's now doing television.



Why are there two flags

in the Caribbean?



We've been out of contact for a month,

sir. We're not sure which one to leave.



- Who's there?

- Your nephew, sir. Jimmy Bond.



Rather a disappointment,

I'm afraid, little Jimmy.



Listen. You can't shoot me.



I have a very low threshold of death.



My doctor says I can't have bun want,

then we train him not to want women.



All our wantable agents

have disappeared, sir.



This is where you come in.

Go through all the auxiliary files.



The lot, sir? It'll take all night.



Your mother did her best work at night.



Shall we continue?



- And what is your name?

- Cooper, Big Eyes. But call me Coop.



- Like something for keeping birds.

- That's me.



- I have to note your qualifications.

- Height  ft  /     lb.



Trophies for karate and judo,

holder of the Kamasutra black belt.



- Very impressive. How do you spell that?

- I'll show you.



I have to check    more auxiliaries

in alphabetical...



Call Mr Zacharias and tell him not to

wait up. The vacancy's just been filled.



A first-class performance, Cooper.




- Your primary statistics fit the bill.

- We aim to please, sir.



You will start

your AFSD training immediately.



Moneypenny, get a few dozen girls

for Cooper to start with.



- Moneypenny?

- A few dozen girls...



I appreciate your confidence, sir.



All agents and trainees will now be known

as James Bond     including the girls.



Won't that be confusing, sir?



The enemy won't know which way

to turn. You are now James Bond.



Congratulations,    .



And you,    ... sir.



Good hunting,    .



Doesn't that do something to you,    ?



It does but I'm being trained to ignore it.

Beauty's only skin-deep.



How about some skin diving?



Not today, Lorelei.



Right. Ting-Ling.



You know that every fifth child

born in the world is Chinese?



- They'll have to keep it up without me.

- Why are you so inscrutable?



- That's meant to be our racket.

- You might be a double agent.



- What would you do if I was?

- Whether you are or not, sayonara.



Next. Shirley.



- You're not Shirley.

- No.



I'm the new secret weapon.



- I've just been perfected.

- Yes, haven't you?



- They've kept me under wraps.

- Lucky them.



What do you do that's so secret?



I don't do anything.

But unless you're one of them, you do.



You're really learning

to put up quite a resistance.



- It goes against my nature.

- I sense that too.



- What are you doing after the exercise?

- Getting my head examined.



Our man in Delhi tells us gold will

be up two points by midday tomorrow.



Buy gold.



- It'll cost you three nuclear warheads.

- Offer two.



Your offer for Rockefeller Center

is accepted.



I've changed my mind. I like London.

What about Lord Nelson's statue?



It was delivered today, Miss Lynd.



My dear Miss Lynd.



- Who are you, sir?

- I am Sir James Bond.



But I thought you were retired, Sir James.



The whole world believes

you were eaten by a shark.

 you often wear that in the office?



If I wore it in the street,

people might stare.



You said, Sir James, you needed my help.



I did, didn't l? I have a dossier on a man

who works at the Buckingham Club.



His name is Evelyn Tremble.



Mr Evelyn Tremble?



- Yes, that's right.

- Isn't Evelyn a girl's name?



No, it's mine actually.



- Do you know me from somewhere?

- Your book: Tremble On Baccarat.



I've studied it very closely.



At night, in my bed.



Is that where you study it?



There are several passes

you describe in your book



which I don't fully understand.



Which passes are these?



They're all marked. I would

have to have my book. Your book.



And my book is in...



My bed.



You're winning tonight.



I'll send my car for you.



- Yes?

- Hello. It's me, Evelyn Tremble.



Hello, Mr Tremble.

Can you hold on for a moment?



Eric? Don't forget to empty

the deepfreeze first thing in the morning.



Hello, Mr Tremble.

I'm so sorry to keep you waiting,



but I was just seeing someone off.



Come right up, all right? Bye-bye.



- So nice of you to come.

- My pleasure.



This way.



  The look of love



  Is in your eyes



  A look your smile can't disguise



  The look oflove



  It's saying so much more

than just words could ever say



  And what my heart has heard



  Well, it takes my breath away



  I can hardly wait to hold you



  Feel my arms around you



  How long I have waited



  Waited just to love you



  Now that I have found you



  You've got the look of love



  It's on your face



  The look that time can't erase









That's Lord Nelson, isn't it?



- Yes. Isn't he beautiful?

- Yes.



- And do you know what he said?

- What?



England expects every man

to do his duty.



So he did, yes. But this is Mayfair.

Lord Nelson's in Trafalgar Square surely.



No, not any more. He's mine.

Haven't you read the papers today?



- I don't normally get them quite so early.

- I get 'em before they're printed.



I suppose you can do anything

if you have money.



Why don't you come down to me?



Thank you very much.



Lovely place you've got down there.



Sit here.



I do so like to feel comfortable

whatever I'm doing.



Yes indeed. Yes.

The more relaxed the muscles,



the better the synchronisation

between mind and body.



I should think you're frightfully

synchronised, Mr Tremble.



- Martini?

- What about them?



I was just about to offer you one.



The things I didn't understand

too well in your book. Let me see...



Was it in chapter seven or chapter six?



Chapter six probably.



Though of course

it could have been chapter seven.



Have you got the book

or is it still in your bed?



I believe it is.



Well, we'd better go

right through the book, hadn't we?



Do you get many complaints

from the neighbours?



Do you really think that your system

is completely faultless?



- Which system?

- Your system for winning at baccarat.



Yes, yes.

The Evelyn Tremble system is faultless.



Good. Come on. We have more to do.






I like a man who is able

to retain his own personality,



no matter what the circumstances.






No matter how he's dressed.



They say it's the clothes

that make the man.



If we're gonna work together, I have

to know what kind of a man you are.



I thought you might have

gathered a little from...



I want to see what happens when

you put on a different hat, a costume.



You know, that sort of thing.



- You like that sort of thing, eh?

- You'll find clothes in there. Put them on.



Well, if you think it's really necessary.



Unless you'd like to

go around one more time.



One more time?



There is nothing wrong with the British

Army that a damn good swim won't cure.



Now, Evelyn Tremble.



   years old, born in Highgate.



Hello, sailor.



The wrong one, yes?






Distinguishing birthmark,

little scar on right shoulder,



strawberry-shaped birthmark on left thigh.



Well, there's nothing unusual in that.



No. I myself have

an apricot one on my hip.



Well, I'll show you my strawberry

if you'll show me your apricot.



Author of a book on baccarat.



Have you ever heard of

a man called Le Chiffre?



Yes. An excellent card player.

He once wrote me a fan letter.



Keep your hands there. Perfect. Lovely.



I devoted a chapter to him in my book.

His forte is baccarat.





If you'd be good enough to sign here, sir.



It's not for me.

It's for the Official Secrets Act.



Of course.



Eyes right!



Eyes front!



- Carry on, Sergeant Major.

- Yes, sir. Mark time!



Halt! About turn.



You really do stock

everything at Harrod's.



Don't pay too much attention.

It's all basic stuff.



It'll be out of date by the January sales.



- Good morning, Johnson.

- Sir!



May I tell you something?



- I'm being followed.

- I know. It's part of the training.



Shadowing people without being seen.



The whole point is I can quite clearly

see the man who is shadowing me.



Oh! Him. Don't worry about him.

He's not one of our trainees.



- He's our security man.

- I see.



Good morning, lnspector.

Don't let me interrupt you.



On the command,

the head is turned thus,



the hat is aimed thus,

the gun is fired thus.



Yes, we're still working on that one.



Now to Agents' Outfitting. Here we are.



- Morning, Q.

- Good morning, Fordyce. New man.



If I could bother you

for the signature, sir.



I shouldn't use that pen.

The moment the nib touches the paper,



it releases a stream of poisonous gas

into the writer's eye.



Good heavens!

What will they think of next?



I won't be going near that.



I suppose it's useful

if you want to send anyone a...



Poison-pen letter.



All our new men say that. I reply "I don't

wish to know that. Kindly leave Ml ."



Yes, sir. We have a very highly developed

sense of humour down here.



It isn't the only thing that's

highly developed down here. Fordyce!



- Wristwatch.

- Sir.



     Rolex Oyster Perpetual.



Date indicator and log table

round the outer band.



And a thing that shows you

what shape the moon is.



- Now, this is very important. Try it on.

- Let me help you.



It's your means of reporting to us

and our means of contacting you.



Channel six, Fordyce.



Don't worry too much about him, sir.

Channel six it is, sir.



I don't think I know

which one is which myself now, sir.



Look at your watch

and tell me what you see.



It's five and    minutes past    .

It's the   th of March and...



I said channel six, Fordyce.



Well, nobody's perfect.



But it's absolutely amazing!

I've never seen anything like this.



It's a two-way television

and radio wristwatch.



It's an American idea. They got it

from one of their comic strips.



- Good heavens.

- Ah! Tea.



Three lumps.



It's an incredible thing, this.



Which side do you dress, sir?



- I usually dress away from the window.

- It's just some protective clothing, sir.



Let me help you

out of your hampering things.



And it is of course Sanforized, sir,



non-iron, and also available

in chocolate, oyster or clerical grey.



- It's hand-reefed and double-charvered.

- Is it?



- It's a little tight around the...

- Poison capsule compartment?



I'm sure we can let it out above

the switchblade and Geiger counter.



Do what you can, Fordyce.

Your intercom button's in here



with midget transmitters

for short-range contacts.



There's an infrared camera, a tape

recorder in the shoulder padding,



a Beretta in the buttonhole,

and a cute little minigun in the gusset.



Yes. Just one thing.



What happens

if I suddenly need to go somewhere?



In this, sir? You'll find safety

instructions under the left lapel.



Don't worry.

You're in very good hands here.



Now this won't hurt a bit, sir.



- Who g-gave you these orders?

- International Mothers' Help, East Berlin.



There it is, Hadley. Our only clue.

The voice of a beautiful woman.



We've checked it out, sir.

It's a Smersh cover operation, sir.



It supplies baby-sitters and au pair girls

to some of the most important families.



Then it must be infiltrated

by someone absolutely reliable.



- I hope you weren't thinking of me.

- I was thinking of Mata.



- You can't mean Mata Hari, sir.

- No, her daughter Mata Bond.



- Mata Bond, sir?

- Her mother gave her that name



because I happen to be

the child's sort of godfather.



And to think that you knew Mata Hari!

She really was one of the greats.



Yes. Great little dancer, terrible spy.



Whereas young Mata is a terrible dancer.

Might be a great little spy.



It's uncanny. Quite uncanny.

What memories it brings back.



Paris, Berlin, Vienna.

How madly we danced through the night.



- I was disguised as a Hungarian hussar...

- What are you going on about?



You're the very image of your mother

and every bit as beautiful.



You knew my mum?



I am Sir James Bond.



- Daddy!

- My child.



- Snail's egg?

- No, thanks. They don't agree with me.



Well, you're a charmer, aren't you?



You dump me in an orphanage when I'm

three, and now, because you need me...



It really was very difficult.

My career was at its height...



It was a traumatic experience,

I can tell you,



being the illegitimate daughter

of Mata Hari and James Bond.



Still, you do get my monthly paychecks?



Your monthly paychecks

went on analysts' fees.



That's why I came here.

I had to get away from it all.



I had no idea. Well, I must say,

you seem to be very comfortable here.



It's crazy. You want a drag?



No, thank you. I'm trying to give that up.

Who are all these people?



They're the high priests of the temple.

OK, Fred. Hop it.



Extraordinary performance.

They seem to treat you like a goddess.



Well, I am the Celestial Virgin

of the Sacred Altar.



- Figuratively speaking, of course.

- Of course. Some tea.



A cup of tea. Splendid.



It's made from poppy seeds. Two cups of

this and you're stoned out of your mind.



Thank you.



You know, if you weren't my dad,

I think I could fancy you.



Well, that's very good of you, my dear.



- Rather warm in here, don't you think?

- Cool it, Charlie.



So you want me to go to Berlin, huh?



Now, Mata. You remember

the old house on the Feldmannstrasse?



- Where Mum had her dancing school.

- It's become lnternational Mothers' Help.



But that's just a cover

for its real function. It is...



- Does he speak English?

- Hey, Charlie. Speak English?



- No.

- Good.



It is a training centre for what

are commonly referred to as spies.



You are eminently suited

to infiltrate the organisation.



Two weeks' briefing in London

and you're off to Berlin.



You want me to be a spy like Mum, huh?



- Well!

- Family tradition, my dear.



Do I get an exploding briefcase

and a secret transmitter?



- That won't be necessary.

- I have to have some equipment.



Your mother wiped out three divisions

of infantry and five of cavalry and...



Well, frankly, she had

much less equipment than you have.



If you have any problems,

contact London immediately.



- Are there any questions?

- Well, I have got one question.



- How do I get to Berlin?

- Oh, dear! Silly me.





                 ter of Mata Hari.

- Mata Hari!



- You are a liar.

- Am l?



Well, what about this, then?



My little Mata Hari!



- I told you she'd come back!

- Silence! Or I will switch you off.



Not that! Anything but that.



You're even more

fascinating than your mother.



You must be Frau Hoffner,

Mum's teacher.



- I had that honour.

- You must be Polo.



She remembers me, her little Polo.

She remembers me.



- Welcome home.

- Welcome indeed.






The Mata Hari School of Dancing is the

only international school of espionage.



There is no political prejudice here.



We train Russian spies for America

und American spies for Russia.



- Very democratic.

- Very democratic.



Some of the greatest spies in the world

have graduated from this institution.



- Von Grudendorf, Malenvosky...

- Peter Lorre, Bela Lugosi.



Here we have

the decoding and cipher class.



We are even training animals

as espionage agents.



We have in the Kremlin

a Russian-speaking parrot



in constant radio communication

with the Pentagon.



Und here is our class

in karate und self-defence.



Excuse me. I have

an important conference to attend.



Polo, you will show Mata to her room.



Please, follow me.



Mata? Allow me.



- Thank you.

- Follow me.



My battery needs recharging.



- Might be your head needs examining.

- No, I had that examined last week.



This is your mother's room. It has not

been opened since she left here in     .



You see? Nothing has been touched.



It's a wild room.



Hey, what an enormous bed.



The German army

was very large in those days.



To see you here in your mother's room

brings back such happy memories.






What's all this about

an important conference, hm?



A representative of Le Chiffre is coming.






Who is Le Chiffre?



Nobody knows.



Not even Le Chiffre.



What's the conference about then, hm?



Le Chiffre is trying to raise money

by selling his unique art collection.



- Why does he need money?

- He is a compulsive gambler, that's why.



Und he is using organisation funds

for his gambling!



- You mean Smersh?

- Smersh!



If he does not pay off his debts,

he will be liquidated.



Liquidated? Who by?



- By them.

- You mean...?



You're so like your mother.

You're driving me mad.



- Well, you haven't got far to go.

- Come to me, my little Mata. Come!



About time you were

back in your box, innit?



You must forgive me.

I lose control of myself.



- I'm a mad fool. Mad.

- You want an argument?



- Remember, forget everything I tell you.

- My lips are sealed.



- Lips! Don't say such words.

- Run along, sonny.



Le Chiffre. Mm-hm.



It's the first john

I've ever gone round with.



There you are.

I have been looking for you.



- It is little Otto.

- Who is he?



One of your mother's lovers.

We often find them lying around.



- Is he dead?

- Hard to tell. He always looked like that.



Come along, child.

The auction is about to begin.






Tonight we are selling one of

the finest art collections in Europe.



- Le Chiffre's collection.

- Who is Le Chiffre?



- The man who owns the collection.

- What collection?



- The one to be auctioned.

- Who said anything about an auction?



- You did.

- Who am l?



- Frau Hoffner.

- Never heard of her. You're insane.



- Quite insane.

- I think she's right.



Gentlemen! Please take your seats

and the auction will commence.



Thank you.



Gentlemen, I am here tonight on behalf of

Le Chiffre, of whom you will have heard,



to auction this unique collection

of art treasures.



Are there any specific

bidding instructions?



When we sit, we are bidding.

When we stand, we are not bidding.



We'll do our bidding sitting down.

When we stand up, we're not bidding.



We stand, we bid.

We no stand, we no bid.



And the British representatives?



Well, I don't know actually.

A bit of both, I suppose, really.



- Is that all right with you chaps?

- That's fine.

w look here.



- Taxi!

- Tally-ho!



I'm sorry, madam.



- Let me go! Taxi!

- Over here!



Come on!



- Good Lord! Captain Towers?

- How nice to see you.



This way!



No, no! Down. No.



- Where to, miss?

- London!



- Le Chiffre speaking.

- The scheme was a failure.



And also Dr Noah knows

what you've been up to.



- What now?

- I'll just have to raise the money.



- But how?

- How? By playing baccarat.



But Le Chiffre, what about me?



What's going to happen to me?



Thank you.

And welcome to France, Monsieur Bond.



We don't want our little talk

to be overheard. Get in the car.



Well, there's nothing

to talk about, is there?



Perhaps. Perhaps not.



The point is you must not

allow yourself to become involved.



Don't forget there are many people here

who loathe and despise you.



I have to warn you, Bond,

my instructions are



that you play your game

with Le Chiffre and leave immediately.



No one can be such a perverse idiot

as to assault a customs official.



- It may just be natural talent, sir.

- I have to warn Vesper.



- You mean James Bond     sir.

- Yes, yes, yes.



Vesper? James Bond    ?



- Vesper, are you there?

- Hello, Sir James. Yes, I'm here.



I can't see you. Your picture's gone.



No, it hasn't. I was

just getting into the bath.



Vesper, do you think

Tremble could be a double agent?



He has enough trouble being

a single agent. Leave him to me.



Right. Over and out.



Mr Bond?



Missed, Mr Bond.






I am Miss Goodthighs.



I can see that.



You've got your cork still in your bottle.



So I have. What are you

going to do about it?



Stick your arm out.



The management of the Hotel Tropical

send their compliments



and hope you will enjoy your stay with us.



I see.



Very sexy pants you're wearing, James.



Yes, they're the new double-O-fronts.



Tell me, Miss Goodthighs,



how much did you tip the porter

to let you in here?



- I just showed him a little kindness.

- How much?



Not too much. He's   .



It's a good year.






What can I do for you?



The question should be

what can I do for you?



- Have you got any suggestions?

- This, for one.



Tell me about yourself, James.



Well, I've had some

pretty wild times in my life.



Could you move over a bit?

You're lying on my loose change.



James, I need you.



Yes, yes, yes.

Well, I can understand that, my dear.



- I want to know you better.

- You're absolutely right.



My goodness, this is strong shampoo.



This really is.



I think I'd better

freshen up a bit quick.



I'll be back in five minutes.

If I'm not, start without me.



  James Bond playing at Casino Royale



  He won a lot of money

and a gal at Casino Royale



  Oh, he's not really

such a wonderful spy



  But winning lots of money

and a gal, he's a fabulous guy



Evelyn! Evelyn!



Evelyn! Evelyn!



Evelyn! Evelyn!



Evelyn, wake up!

Evelyn, what's the matter?



- Wake up! You were drugged.

- What?



- You were drugged.

- Yes, I know I was drugged.



I put the antidote pill in. And then...



Hey, I thought those antidote.



- Infrared glasses.

- The cheat!



Listen, Evelyn.



You win and he will almost certainly

be killed by his organisation.



- But he'd try and avoid that, wouldn't he?

- If you win, yes.



- How?

- By trying to kill you.



- As in dead?

- Yes. But don't worry about that now.



Let's go down there

and you play the game of your life.



Yes, I better had. There may

not be too much more of it left.



- Vesper...

- Don't worry. I'll take care of you.



- Well, then. It's all under control now.

- I hope so.



- Well, excuse me.

- Willingly.



Messieurs, faites vos jeux.



I believe you have my name

in a crevice. James Bond.



- Pardon, monsieur?

- Bond. James Bond.



Oh, yes, Mr Bond.



Bond? James Bond?

The name is familiar.



I don't believe I've had the pleasure.



- I'm flattered you've heard of me.

- I have heard of you,



but not as an expert on baccarat.



Well, I'm sorry you weren't told.



Don't think that went unnoticed, Mr Bond.



I see everything that goes on at this table.



- Nothing escapes me.

- I'm quite sure it doesn't.



But we mustn't forget that



the beggar who is in the marketplace



is completely deaf

insomuch as far as listening



to the song that is coming

from the mockingbird is concerned.



I'm sorry, Mr Bond,

I don't get the connection.



You will.



Sim salabim.



When you're quite ready.



Now I require a perfectly ordinary

gentleman's pocket handkerchief.



From the pocket

of one perfectly ordinary gentleman.



That's the kind of remark

that leads to war.



How much better for all humanity



if all the nations could learn

to live together in peace.









That's finished, is it?

Fantastic. Wonderful. Incredible.



Incredible, isn't it? Absolutely marvellous.

I've never seen anything like it.



And now if you're ready, Monsieur

Le Chiffre, I would like to play baccarat.



- I use the Evelyn Tremble method.

- You read Tremble.



Are we?



The inspector isn't asking us.

He's telling us.



A police car will escort you

from the hotel to the airport.



- Mr Mathis.

- Yes?



Something's been worrying me.



You're a French police officer

and yet you have a Scots accent.



Aye. It worries me, too.



Haven't by any chance seen

a young lady in a green dress?



Would that be a lady

with a black bag over her head



being manhandled

by two unsavoury gentlemens?



- Could very well be.

- She went that way, sir.



In a car. A very fast car!



- Moss?

- Yes, sir.



- Follow that car!

- Yes, sir.



I'll use Fangio next time. Idiot!



Grand Prix enthusiasts may be worried



by the time it's taken me

to get into this Lotus Formula Three.



They don't realise that although Le Chiffre

thinks he has a faster car than me,



I am faster in my Lotus Formula Three!



Wake up, Mr Bond. Wake up.



Well, now, Mr Bond. You've had

your little victory at the baccarat table.



Now it's my turn. I'm going to

have to have that cheque, Mr Bond.



Smersh is going to be very unhappy.



- You mean you're going to torture me?

- Persuade you, Mr Bond. Persuade you.



Don't worry about that chair with the hole.

It's merely waiting to be reupholstered.



- By me.

- You have an inventive mind, Mr Bond.



But my methods are much more subtle.

They have to be.



- What are you going to do?

- Physically, I'm not going to do anything.



Oh, you're going to nothing me to death.



Torture of the mind. The most

exquisite torture is all in the mind.



I'm going to have to

have that cheque, Mr Bond.



Suppose Mr Bond isn't ready

to give it to you?



You are a tiresome little man.

Let's try another approach.



It's a beauty contest, Mr Bond.



You're supposed to pick the winner.



- Excuse me. Are you Richard Burton?

- No, I'm Peter O'Toole.



Then you're the finest man

that ever breathed.



- God bless you, sir.

- Thank you.



You've changed my plans, Miss Lynd.



But neither you nor Bond will leave here

till I get that cheque!



Mr Tremble?



Never trust a rich spy.



Le Chiffre, you're a fool. Smersh

believed you could win at baccarat.



- All I need is    hours!

- It's too late.



Oh, Daddy, I do so long to meet him.

All the girls do. He really turns me on.



- Did that finishing school teach you that?

- No, I taught them.



Now run along and watch

the Changing of the Guard.



- I bet Mummy would have taken me in.

- Mummy took everyone in.



Put me down! Put me down!!



- What is it, a film?

- It must be a commercial.



No time for window-gazing, Moneypenny.

Mata's been kidnapped.



- But...

- That's an unidentified flying object.



And our fastest jets

trying to track it down. Control?



- That's the canteen.

- Control!



Contact all operatives.

We must find out where it lands.



- Air Ministry. They've lost it.

- Lost it? You were right on its tail.



Well, you must have

one plane fast enough... I see.



They stopped building those last week.



I wonder if you'd care to help us.



- Could you come back...

- Do please come in, Sister.



It's our annual collection for needy girls.



Your receipt?



This department has always been

very helpful to needy girls.



That's strange.

We've never had a receipt before.



"They're taking your daughter

to Casino Royale. Sister McTarry."



The Prime Minister, urgently.



Daddy'll come after me.



- That's what we're hopin'.

- You won't get away with this.



Move to the door, Mata Bond.

You are a prisoner of Smersh.



We already have most of your father's

agents here. You will complete the set.



- Looks like a Smersh convention.

- Le directeur wishes to see you.



- It is about your daughter.

- Tactic  B if necessary.



I will tell him you are here.



Hold it! Back up.



Face the curtains!






You are now entering

the Smersh headquarters of Dr Noah.



Tactic   A.






Operation James Bond completed.



Dr Noah, I presume.

Why don't you come out and face me?



Because you are going to

come in and face me.









This is an historic day

in our saga, Sir James.



The day Smersh finally eliminated

the original James Bond.



- His world will soon follow.

- This is all very impressive.



You might be even more impressed

to meet one of my      doubles.



Waiting for the moment when

I command them to take over the world.



It's fantastic. May I take a closer look?



It's quite perfect.



- Good Lord! It's my nephew.

- Jimmy Bond?



This explains the Caribbean assignment.

Is this some kind of a joke?



- He can't speak!

- Never could in my presence.



Psychological block he's had since

childhood, based on hero worship.



- He's Dr Noah?

- My nephew the head of Smersh?



I have been bombed, bullied and baited

out of retirement to deal with you?



- Do you suppose he's a junkie?

- Leave this to me.



Now, Jimmy, as your uncle

I really must insist...



- What is it?

- He's put a sheet of glass between us.



I never should have let Nellie

send him to progressive school.



What's that?



Dr Noah's bacillus? Now, Jimmy,

even you wouldn't release germ warfare.



Handle these capsules with care.

Dr Noah's bacillus is highly contagious.



When distributed in the atmosphere

it will make all women beautiful



and destroy all men over  ft  .



- Please handle these capsules with care.

- So that's your plan, huh?



A world full of beautiful women

and all men shorter than yourself.



Good evening. All this just to make up

for your feeling of sexual inferiority?



I'm beginning to think

you're a trifle neurotic.



Maybe you can explain. Why was I

abducted and subjected to this?



Because, of all Uncle James's    s,

you're the most beautiful and desirable.



Do you treat

all the girls you desire this way?



Yes! I undress them and tie them up.

I learned that in the Boy Scouts.



Let me ask you a question.

Do I appear menacing to you at all?



- What are you laughing at?

- Nothing. I just think...



Did you see yourself in the mirror lately?

I think you should.



You are a wretched, grotesque,

ridiculous, insignificant little monster.



Are you saying to me that you find

Uncle James more attractive than I am?



Uncle James? He's a real man. Wow!



Do you realise that anything

Uncle James can do I can do better?



That will be the day.



You're crazy. You are absolutely crazy.



- They called Einstein crazy.

- No one ever called Einstein crazy.



- They would have if he behaved like this.

- People respected Einstein.



Einstein could never have conceived

of something like this.



It looks like an aspirin, it tastes

like an aspirin, but it's not an aspirin.



- It's cyanide.

- This pill contains     tiny time pills.



They go off in the body,

forming a chain reaction,



and turn the person

into a walking atomic bomb.



Einstein's bomb was crude.

This is brilliant.



It's crude to tie up women.



In a week it'll be

April Fools' Day, my birthday.



All world leaders will be assassinated

and my doubles will take their places.



In five days' time

I'll be ruler of the Earth.



- How would you like to be my co-ruler?

- Why not?



- Why not? You hate me.

- I don't know.



I'm beginning to wonder

if the real genius of the Bond family



is not right here in the room with me now.



- Why don't you unlock me?

- Yes, I will.



I'll unlock you immediately

and we'll run amok.



If you're too tired, we'll walk amok.



I'm so sorry for all the things I said.

I didn't really mean it.



- Here. Slip into this.

- Just a moment. Be careful.



Yes. I don't want to

damage any of your parts.






Thank you.



Now, turn yourself like a nice fool

while I slip this on.



Yes. Yes, I'll wait over here.



This'll show Sir James once and for all

which of us has the perfect body.



The poor boob! Hurry, my dear.



I have great plans for us.



It's vaporised lysergic acid.

It's highly explosive.



You are now entering

Dr Noah's personal aircraft



where our beloved leader

has assembled a collection



of the world's

most distinguished doubles.



Dr Noah's jet orbital space plane

welcomes you aboard.



A great likeness, isn't she?

I copied her right down to the last...



The two of us have had some profoundly

moving religious experiences.



How do you like this place? I had a

decorator help me, but I worked with her.



Your leader

has remoulded ordinary agents



into replicas of the world's greatest

figures in culture, politics and the arts.



- Look! They're uncovered!

- These are not doubles.



These are the real people. I've already

substituted my robots for them.



At this very minute the world is being

ruled by duplicates under my control.



Well, that explains a lot of things.



Your rain-cooled Taittinger, sir.



The drink!



And for you.



Think of it. A world free of

poverty and pestilence and war.



A world where all men are created equal.



Where a man, no matter how short,

can score with a top broad.



Where each man, regardless of race,

creed, colour, gets free dental work



and a chance of subscription-buying

all the good things in life.



But, Noah, you are for all this?



No, no. I'm against all this.



I love politics!



- To your future.

- I'll drink to that.



My very special champagne.



- With your very special pill in it.

- What are you talking about?



It looks like an aspirin, it tastes

like an aspirin, but it isn't an aspirin.



- And you just swallowed it.

- You're lying.



    more of those little pills to go off.

Have a real bomb of an evening!



Alka Seltzer!









Delightful vintage, sir.



-    .

- Smooth to the palate.



Here. There's a fish

in my mixture. You fool!



I say! Super place for a coming-out party.



Now now, Mata.



- Through here!

- Down!



Look! Quick, before the fuse burns out.



Try not to look conspicuous.



- Good Lord! It's one of ours.

- Sir!



- We've got to get out before he blows up!

- We've got to find that office.



- What office?

- The one we came down in, of course.



Leave this to me.



Where's the office? The office.



Come on! Quick.



That's very civil of you, sir. Thank you.



- Come on, give me a hand.

- Look out!



Follow me!






Mata, put your finger

in the tiger's ear. It works the doors.



- Good.

- What's the strategy, sir?



Get out of the bloody place

before it blows up.



- Everybody stay close behind me.

- I'm not chancing that casino again.



- I'd rather slide down a drainpipe.

- Beautiful, but no stamina.



Get the girls out the back way.

I'm sorry I got you into this.



Good heavens, Daddy.

I couldn't have enjoyed it more.



Over there.



Clear the building.

It's liable to blow up.



I want London. Whitehall double     .



Too bad you won't get it, Sir James.



I went through a lot of trouble

to bring you here.



Dear Vesper.

The things you do for money.



This time it's for love, Sir James.



- Don't expect...

- Back to the office.



The American aid, sir. It's arrived.















- Glad we could be of help, sir.

- Good Lord! Ransome, isn't it?



A-OK, Sir James. CIC at CIA.



Don't start all that again.

I haven't worked out your last lot yet.



- As you were saying, sir?

- A-OK, Ransome. A-OK.



- Ciao.

- Ciao.


where it's terribly hot



  The formula is safe with old    



  He's got a redhead in his arms



  Though he's a lover,

when you are in trouble



  Have no fear, look who's here



  James Bond!



  They've got us on the run



  With guns and knives



  We're fighting for our lives



  Have no fear, Bond is here



  He's going to save the world

at Casino Royale



  At Casino Royale



  The formula is safe with old    



  He's got a redhead in his arms



  Though he's a lover,

when you are in trouble



  Have no fear, look who's here



  James Bond!



  They've got us on the run



  With guns and knives



  We're fighting for our lives



  Have no fear, Bond is here



  He's going to save the world

at Casino Royale



  James Bond is here



  So have no fear

Special help by SergeiK