Wallace And Gromit In The Curse Of The Were Rabbit Script - Dialogue Transcript

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Wallace And Gromit In The Curse Of The Were Rabbit Script





Cracking job, Gromit.



Hang on, old chum.



- What's going on?

- Who is it?



Reel him in, lad.



To me. To me.



Gotcha! Thieving monster.



Me prize pumpkin.



Me little baby. Me pride and joy.



You've saved it, Anti-Pesto.



it was nothing at all, Mrs...



- Everything's under control.

- Oh, no!



Don't worry, madam.



Thank you, Mr. Wallace.



All in a night's work, Mrs. Mulch.



Cute little feller, isn't he?



You'd never believe

they'd cause so much damage.



Oh, he may look innocent, sir.



But left to his own devices,



this is the ultimate

vegetable-destroying machine.



Reg, me teeth!



Job well done, lad.



Subject disarmed and neutralized.



Bless you, Anti-Pesto.



With you out there protecting our veg,



the most important event

of the year is safe.



Aye. And I hope they give them pests

what's coming to 'em, and all.



Amen to that, Mrs. Mulch.



it was a long, hard night

last night, Gromit.



Iíll need a good, hearty

breakfast under me belt.



Pile it up, lad.



Iím in the mood for food!



Gromit, old pal.



itís happened again.

Iíll need assistance.



Well, thanks, chuck.



Iím sure that hole's getting smaller.



Another successful night.

How are the inmates?



Must be getting

a bit full down there.



Talking of which.



Now, for a great big plate of...






Still got me on the diet, eh, Gromit?



Watching me shape?

There's a good dog.



Gromit, lad?



How is that prize melon

of yours coming on?



Must be a while

since you measured it.



Lovely food. For rabbits, that is.



As for me, I need something

a bit more cheesy.



Caught red-handed, eh, lad?



Iím sorry, Gromit.



l know you're doing this

for my own good,



but the fact is

Iím just crackers about cheese.



Look, if I must change me ways,



at least let me do it my way.



With technology.



itís time we tried my latest invention,



the Mind Manipulation-omatic.



it extracts unwanted

thoughts and desires.



l haven't tested it yet,

but it should be perfectly safe.



Just a bit of harmless

brain alteration, that's all.



Anti-Pesto Humane Pest Control.

How might we be of assistance?



Yes. Lady Tottington here

of Tottington Hall.



Your Ladyship.



This is an honor.



itís a disaster. I have

the most terrible rabbit problem.



The competition's only days away.

You simply have to do something.



Certainly, ma'am. I think we're

about to go up in the world, lad.



Just stay right where you are,

your Ladyship,



and we'll be with you in an...



in an hour? I can't wait an hour.



l have a major infestation.

Hello? Hello?



That's more like it.



Thank goodness you've...



What ho! For you, my love.



Victor. How lovely and... unexpected.



Heard you had a spot of rabbit bother

and toodled on over



to sort the blighters out.



Gosh, that's awfully sweet of you.



But you really needn't bother.



itís no bother, little boo-boo. itís

the least a chap can do for his filly.



Don't want pests spoiling

our beautiful manor house, do we?



''Our'' manor house?



No one's mentioned marriage, Victor.



All in good time, my dear.



Vermin first, though, what what.



Come on, Phillip.






We can deal with this humanely.



Very classy.



Just the sort of client

we should be dealing with, eh, lad?



Burrowing bounders!



They must be breeding like...



...well, rabbits.



Only one thing for it, lad.



Victor, hadn't we agreed?



No more thoughtless killing.



Quite right, my dear.



So Iíve thought this one through

very carefully.



itís off to bunny heaven

for you, big ears.



Victor! No!



What the...?



Champion sucker, eh, Gromit?



The BunVac     .



This'll impress her Ladyship.



l don't understand.

it should have been a bull's-eye.



Oh, Victor. I felt we'd

made a real breakthrough



with this hunting obsession of yours.

l really thought you'd changed.



Iím sorry, Campanula,

but I am what I am.



There's no nonsense

with Victor Quartermaine.



What you see is what you get.



What the...?



Sounds like a really big brute,

this one.



Give it some more welly.






Maybe I should've

used a bigger nozzle.



Anti-Pesto, you're here.



Your Ladyship.



My darlings!



You're safe.



My word!



What a fabulous job you've done.

And not a single one harmed.



The old BV     ma'am.



Capable of     RPM.

That's rabbits per minute.



How inspired!



- Mr...?

- Oh, Wallace.



Mr. Wallace.



is this all of them?



Just one left.

Hoist her up, Gromit.



Victor, stop fooling around in the dirt

and have a look at this.



The ingenious Anti-Pesto



have completely dealt

with my rabbit problem.



- isnít it marvelous?

- Marvelous?






This confounded contraption

virtually suffocated me!



Besides, the job's only half done.



How do you intend

to finish these vermin off?



Crush 'em? Liquidize 'em?



- They're humane.

- Humane?



Well, then perhaps they'd be humane

enough to give me back my dignity.



l want...



Toupee, please.



Oh, grand.

We take check or cash.



Toupee, you idiot!

My hair is in your machine.



Oh, no, it's only rabbits in there.



The hare, I think you'll find,

is a much larger mammal.



Out of my way, fool.



Iím sorry, my dear, but I refuse

to suffer any further humiliation



at the hands of these

blundering nitwits.



l therefore bid you good day.



Thank you for ridding me

of a real problem, Mr. Wallace.



Tell me, what exactly will you do

with all these rabbits?



Trade secret.



Yes. Iíd be happy to let them roam free

if it wasn't for the competition.



But they do so love their veg.



itís in their little bunny natures,

and you can't change that, can you?






Or can you?



Why didn't we think of it before, lad?



The solution to all

our storage problems.



Simply by connecting the BunVac



to the Mind Manipulation-omatic,



we can brainwash the bunnies.



Rabbit rehabilitation.



Once cured of their antisocial

veg-ravaging behavior,



the rabbits can be safely released

without fear of re-offending.



Just a little added lunar power

to enhance the mind waves...



...and we can begin.



Veg, bad.



Veg, bad.



Veg, bad.



Say no to carrots,



cabbage and cauliflower.



Well, come on, lad,

what are you waiting for?



Turn on the BunVac.



Full suction.



itís working, Gromit.

itís working!



Their tiny bunny brains



are being saturated

in my veg-free mind waves.



Another    minutes

brainwashing should suffice.



Then we can move on

to the conditioning.






Switch it off!



Get it off!



Get it off me, lad!



Oh, thanks, lad.






Give us a carrot.



it worked, Gromit!



A reformed rabbit.



We'll call him Hutch. Shall we?



Come on. Let's get the kettle on.



We'll see to him in the morning.



l feel we're on the cusp

of a real breakthrough, lad.



Mankind freed from

rabbit problems forever.



Lady Tottington will be impressed.



Good night.



Sleep tight.



And don't let the bed bugs bite.



Good night, Gromit.



Sweet dreams, old chum.



Protect and nourish the frail

and the weak, O Lord.



Protect and nourish the frail

and the weak, O Lord.



Let them grow big and strong

under Thy loving care.



in fact, let them grow bigger

and stronger than anyone else's,



so that the first prize might be mine.






The harvest offering

to bind the deal.



We plow the fields

and scatter the good seed on...



He sends the snow in winter...



All good gifts around us



Are sent from...



Heavens above.






Hello? is anybody there?



Mrs. Mulch?



Please, come forward,

whoever you are.



There's no need to be afraid.



You're hungry.

Then please, take what you like.



it is for the needy, after all.



No! No! No! No!






Morning, Gromit.



A pest-free night per... chance?



Lummy day.



- itís a disaster.

- Me garden's ruined.



- itís a disaster.

- Me garden's ruined.



- itís carnage out there.

- Where were Anti-Pesto?



Simmer down.

Simmer down, now.



Right. One at a time, if ya please.



We pay good money

for our crop protection.



lf ya can't deliver the goods,

maybe you should keep your traps shut.



l never saw such cauliflower carnage.



Worse than the

Great Slug Blight of '  



when there were slugs

the size of pigs.



Growbag's right. The slugs are back!



The slugs are back!



That's enough! That's enough!



Look, this flippin'

vegetable competition



- causes nothin' but trouble every year.

- Here we go.



- lf ya ask me...

- Get on with ya!



Know what? Iíll tell ya.

lf ya ask me, this was arson.



- Arson?

- Aye!



Someone arsin' around.



That's right.

One of you lot. A man.



- This was no man.

- What are you saying?



Does a man have teeth



the size of axe blades?



Or ears like terrible tombstones?



By tampering with nature,



forcing vegetables to swell

far beyond their natural size,



we have brought a terrible judgment

upon ourselves.



Hey! Give over!



You're mental.



And for our sins,



a hideous creature

has been sent to punish us all!



Repent! Repent!



Lest you too, taste the wrath of...



...the Were-Rabbit!



This is terrible!

What's going to happen to us?



- Doomed!

- Who's going to help us?



- What's to become of the show?

- We live for that competition.



- Get off me.

- We're simple folk. itís all we have.



- Who will save us?

- Get... Hey!



A Were-Rabbit?



Oh, come, come, now.



l do believe the vicar's been

to the communion wine again.



What we are dealing with here

is no supernatural rabbit.



itís a big fellow, perhaps.



But a mortal creature

of flesh and blood.



A matter easily dealt with

by a hunter.



Guns will not be necessary,

thank you, Victor.



Hasn't there been enough destruction?



l believe the killing

of fluffy creatures



is never justified.



l say we give Anti-Pesto

a second chance.



What? How on earth would

those tiny-minded buffoons



ever catch such a big rabbit?



Mr. Wallace?






With a big trap.



By Jove. He's... He's got it!



- Genius!

- Genius!



- Brilliant.

- What a great idea!






You see, Victor,



there's hope for the vegetables yet.



Not the ones Iím looking at.



That's me boys!



Love, Gromit.



That's the biggest trap of all.



The ''tender trap,'' they call it.



And that's what we'll use

to catch this thing.



Yes, lad, a lovely lady rabbit.



How could any

hot-blooded rabbit-beast resist?



Oh, come on, Gromit.



A bit more, you know, alluring.



Very cheeky.



That's more like it, lad.



How can we possibly fail now?



You're a total knockout.



Stick around, lad.



Should fix back on quite easily.



Nighty-night, me lovelies.



Think big now.






Don't worry. No. No.



Well, Iím very sorry, Mrs. Mulch.



We'll get there as soon as we can.

Mr. Dibber. Oh, yes.



Can I call you back? Mrs. Girdling.



- A tunnel you say?

- What do you intend to do about this?



Iíll look into it.



So where did you get to, lad?



l thought I told you to stay put.



itís gone mad around here.



l thought we were

supposed to be a team.



How are we ever

gonna catch this thing



if you go gallivanting off

on your own all the time?



You're doing it again!



Where are you going now?









Really, lad.



You do realize Iíve made

a personal promise to Lady Tottington.



How is this sort of

behavior going to get us



any nearer to finding

a rabbit-mon... ster?






Oh, Gromit.



We've created a monster.



Hutch is the beast.



The lunar panels.



They must've over-stimulated

Hutch's primitive bunny nature.



And now, when the moon appears,



he undergoes

a hideous transformation.



Oh, Gromit.



This is absolutely...






Don't you see, lad?



OK, so we've created

a veg-ravaging rabbit-monster.



But we've also captured it.



Just like I promised Lady Tottington.



Iíll go and tell her the good news.



Make sure he doesn't escape.






Mr. Wallace.



itís the beast, your Ladyship.

l bring great news.



Gosh, how exciting.

Please, do come in.



Well, this is simply spiffing news.



With the beast in captivity,

the competition can go ahead as planned.



You saved the day, Mr. Wallace.



it was nothing, your Ladyship.



So modest.



Oh, please, do help yourself.






l so appreciate you coming

all this way to let me know, Wallace.



Tell me, are you

a vegetable-lover yourself?



- They're... growing on me.

- Then come with me.



There's something

very special I want to show you.



Hop in.



- itís very snug.

- itís my Jacob's ladder.



And it goes all the way to heaven.



Welcome to my inner sanctum, Wallace.



My secret garden.



itís a veritable



vegetable paradise.



l just knew you'd love it.



Unlike Victor.



He's never shown

any interest in my produce.



- His loss, Lady Tottington.

- Please, Wallace.



Call me Totty.



lf anything were to happen

to my vegetables,



l don't know what Iíd do.



Iím sure you understand, Mr. Wallace.



l can see that you're

a true nature lover.



Oh, yes. Yes, I am.



At first, I thought

l could change Victor.



Now Iím not so sure.



Do you think a man can change, Wallace?






Oh, yes.



Really, Phillip.

The things one does for love.






- Mr. Wallace.

- Oh, Totty.






Iíd like to show you one last thing.



Something no other man

has ever seen.



My carrot de Chantenay.



Just smell it, Wallace.



- Feel its silken flesh.

- Oh, yes.



isnít it the most sumptuous,

succulent specimen you've ever seen?



- Yes!

- Doesn't it fill your heart



- with desire?

- Yes!



Just imagine

what it would taste like.



What on earth

were you thinkin' of, lad?



Ruined a perfectly good piece

of fashionable knitwear, that did.



To say nothing of a relationship

with an important client.



itís lucky for us her Ladyship

was so understanding.



Honestly, I don't know

what's got into you lately.



And slow down for pity's sake.



You'll buckle me trunnions.



Don't worry. Iíll see to this.



You stay here where you belong.

in the doghouse.






itís heavier than it looks.



l know your little secret, Pesto.



- I know exactly what's going on.

- Your Lordship...



Yes. You think you can

pilfer my filly, don't you?



You think you can con

a woman out of her fortune?



- Who, me?

- Well, I got here first!



Iíve spent a long time reeling in

that fluffy-headed bunny-lover.



And Iím not about to let some

puddle-headed peasant poach her from me.



- Comprenez?

- Right-o.



Iíll be off then. Ta-ta.



You're not going anywhere, Pesto.



Not until Iíve taught you

a jolly good lesson.



Come on! Queensberry rules!



Put 'em up, ya little pipsqueak.



You're shaking.



Don't tell me you're a scaredy-cat

as well as a scoundrel.



And don't think acting

like a big girl's blouse



will get you out of it.



There's no mercy

with Victor Quartermaine.



What the dickens?



What on earth...?



Phillip! Attack!






What the...?






Vicar! Oh, where the devil is he?



Do you want to confess?



l want to talk to you about...



...the beast.



Everything you need

to know is in this book.



- ''Nun Wrestling.''

- No. I meant this one.



Here. Here it is.



The hideous monster

plaguing our parish.



The Were-Rabbit.



So it's true.



The beast lurks

within all of us, my child.



The side that emerges at night

as the moon rises into the sky.



The side that

savagely rips the leaves



off any innocent cabbage.



Spare me the sermon, Vicar.



Just tell me how I kill him.

l mean ''it.''



To kill such a creature



would require nerves of steel






...a bullet.



A bullet?



A bullet.



A bull...



What kind of bullet?



A bullet of pure gold.









Twenty-four karat.



Get out of my way.



Silly old fool.




Beware of the beast within!



Perfect re-entry, Gromit.



This veg diet's

doing the trick, eh, lad?



l feel smashing.



So how's our rabbit-monster?



Hope you're keeping an eye on him.



What's up, dog?



Well, fancy that.



Rabbit ears.



That is a bit odd.



And what are you tryin' to say, lad?









What? You think that Iím the...?



Because of these?



Oh, no.



No. This is just a reaction



to that healthy veg diet

you've got me on.



itís the toxins coming out.



Silly old pooch.



Thinking Iím the beast.



Next thing you'll be saying



is that Hutch

is turning into me.



Hey. What are you doing, lad?



Have you gone completely mad?









l do like a bit of Gorgonzola.



Oh, dear.



- Perfect.

- Ma'am.



- Now, let's see.

- Coming through!



The tombola's arrived.



And the bouncy Tottington Hall.






itís going to be such

a jolly competition tonight.



l just know it.



- Ya don't know nothin'.

- What?



The beast has struck again.

That's what.



That's right!



No, you're quite mistaken, Mrs. Mulch.



- The beast is in captivity.

- Oh, yeah?



Then just take a look

at my wife's brassicas.



- Ravaged in the night.

- But I don't understand.



- Anti-Pesto told me...

- A pack of lies!



itís not safe to bring

our vegetables here.



The show's off.



But this is simply dreadful news.



The Tottingtons have held

a giant vegetable competition



on this very night

for over     years.



That's right.



Not even the Great Duck Plague

of '   stopped it.



lf only there were another way.



What ho!



itís Quartermaine.



Heard you had a spot of rabbit bother.



Didn't this bit used to...?



Now. Now, let's see.



Where does this part go?



Oh, it's hopeless.



Iíll never fix this flippin' machine.



Me mind's just a rabbit-y mush.



Oh, Gromit.



l don't wanna be a giant rabbit!



The bounce is gone from his bungee.



Hey, presto! Rabbit rehabilitation.



But if I can't fix it...






...maybe the other me can!



Iím inventing, mostly.



Look at me go! Iím a genius.



Awake! I can't answer the door.

Not like this.



Charming. Iím Wallace.



l already am!












Hang on a mo'.






Hello? I say.

Open this door at once.






Lady Tottington, if you don't mind.



Iím afraid I have some

rather bad news, Wallace.



Thing is, well,



you've rather let me down

with this beastly beast business.



- I suppose I have.

- Yes.



itís obvious to me

that you have absolutely no idea



where this poor creature is.



And Iím afraid

you've given me no option



but to let Victor

shoot the poor thing.



Shoot it?



Yes. Wasn't an easy choice,



but the veg competition

has to come first.



Besides, Victor's promised me

it won't suffer.



it will be quick and painless.



How thoughtful.



l cannot deny it was

a difficult decision for me.



Because Iíve recently developed...






...feelings for you.




Oh, well, never mind, eh?



- Ta-ra, then.

- Wait! Wallace.



l haven't finished.

There's more that needs to be said.



Well, Iíll give you a tinkle, shall l?



Can't we at least shake hands?

Part as friends?



itís not very convenient

at the moment.



Thanks for coming by.



Well, l... l...



That's right, my lovely.



You can say goodbye

to your fluffy lover-boy.



You gotta help me, Gromit!



Hide me. Anything.



Before it's too late!






Your Lordship.



Good night, Gromit.



'Tis done.



My poor sensitive child.



Allow us all to share

in your moment of sorrow.






On with the show!



What the...?



Why you...



Of course.



The vegetable competition.



Your loyalty is moving.



Sadly, you won't be.



Come along, Phillip.



Everyone's been looking

forward to a good show.



Let's see they get one.



- Hooray!

- Mr. Growbag.



l... I have a hunch

this'll be a night to remember.



l just have a hunch.



All right. All right.

lf we must do this flipping veg show,



let's do it in an orderly

and law-abiding fashion.



Cucumbers, give way to melons.



Carrots, wait your turn!



- Aubergines...

- There's our bait, Phillip.



All we have to do now is wait

for our fluffy friend to appear.



Look over here, everyone!

itís Victor!



- He's here!

- Our hero.



Please, sir, kiss my baby.



- Another time, perhaps.

- Kiss my potato.



- Not now.

- Kiss my artichoke.



- Look, just...

- Victor.






Victor, I have to know.

Did it suffer?



Of course not, my dear.

Not yet, anyway.



- Victor?

- Oy, you.



- Constable.

- Careful with them capsicums.



Listen, I don't want to cause panic,

but the beast isn't actually dead yet.



- The beast isn't actually dead yet?

- What?






To the competition stand!



Cracking toast, Gromit.



Iím just crackers about cheese.



Monterey Jack.



Smashing Wensleydale.



Job well done, lad.









Now, listen carefully.



Iíve only got two...



Iíve only got one gold bullet left.



So leave this to me.



Yes, all right, I admit

the beast is still at large.



But the good news is your prize

vegetables are the perfect bait...






...and will draw the creature

like a magnet.



- Keep still.

- My baby.



- There, there, love. itíll be all...

- Don't even move a muscle.



Mrs. Mulch! No!



itís not getting my baby!



Lovely food. For rabbits, that is.



- Come back!

- Come back!



Yes. Right on cue.



Come back!



Go away!



That's right. Come to Uncle Victor.



itís coming for us!






What the...?



Hurrah for Anti-Pesto!



- itís getting away!

- Get off, you stupid...






Vicar, I need more gold bullets.



They don't come cheap, you know.



Victor? What are you doing?



l need it, my sweet. Emergency.



- Victor, no! Please!

- Come, now, Campanula, let go.



But it's my Golden Carrot Award.



This is hardly the time, my darling.



- Give it to me this instant!

- But Victor!



Cheese, Gromit.



The Golden Carrot belongs in the show!



No, the Golden Carrot

belongs in the Were-Rabbit.



Every man for himself!



Help! Help! Help me!



Put me down at once,

you great big hairy thing, you!



Stop! Stop!



Mob supplies!

Get your angry mob supplies here.



Put her down, you great ugly brute!



Iíll bagsy the lucky rabbit's foot.



Help me, someone! Help me!






No. No, no, no!



Put me down! Put me down, you...



Whatever you are! Help!



What is it?



What are you staring at

with those beastly eyes?






Oh, Wallace.



What ever have you done to yourself?



Well, don't you worry.

Iíll protect you.



Get your hairy mitts off

my future wife, you big brute.



No! Victor!



You don't understand.

The hunt is off.



itís... We made a terrible mistake.



No. You commissioned me

to rid you of Pesto,



and that's just

what I intend to do.






Why, you knew

it was Wallace all along.



Oh, all right.



So what if it is that blithering idiot.



No one will ever believe you.



And if I can't have your money,

l can still bag your bunny.



My eyes!



Run, rabbit, run!



l rather like your hair pinned back.



No, Victor, no! Stop! Please!






You can hop,

but you can't hide, Pesto.



Beware the moon!



Stupid interfering mutt.



Stand back! There may be

a large rabbit dropping!



Looks like the buck stops here.



Eat karat, bunny boy!



Potty poo!



No one beats Victor Quartermaine!



is that so?



Consider yourself dumped.



He's in there!



- There he is!

- Surround him!



There he is! Over there!



Phillip, help me! Phillip!



Do something.



Destroy! Drive out the monstrosity!



Well, let's see how he likes it.






Oh, Gromit.



Well, at least now he's at peace.



The rabbit's gone.



lf only there were a way

to bring back Wallace.



Lovely cheese, Gromit.






Don't forget the crackers.









itís me again. Iím back!



Gromit! You clever mutt.



Well done, old pal!



- Totty!

- Wallace! You're...



Thanks, lad.



Oh, look!



Well, I think

you deserve this, Gromit.



For a brave and splendid melon.



We've all got a lot to thank you for.



Every dog has his day.



And thank you, Wallace.



You've saved me

from a terrible marriage.



All the same,



it is going to be rather lonely

at Tottington Hall now.






l have a little proposal

for you, Wallace.



Iím so thrilled you agreed

to go through with this.



My pleasure, Totty.



One for the album, Gromit.



l declare this bunny sanctuary

officially open.



When you're ready, lad.



Fire up the old BV    .



Oh, it's simply marvelous.



My home, a safe haven

for all things fluffy.



l do hope you'll still

come visit, Wallace.



Iíd rather got used to

having you around.



There'll always be a part of me



here at Tottington Hall.



Give it some more welly, lad.





Special help by SergeiK