A Face in The Crowd Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the A Face in The Crowd script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Elia Kazan movie with Andy Griffith.  This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of A Face in The Crowd. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

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A Face in The Crowd Script


  

  

 

                   

Somebody's looking for you.



 

                   

Miss Jeffries!



 

                   

Morning, Sheriff.



 

                   

We've got what you want, we always

get a good haul on the 4th of July.



 

                   

Good. Come on, letís go.



 

                   

Here she comes, Bill.



 

                   

Come in, and see what we've got.



 

                   

Wait, I forgot my tape recorder.



 

                   

Boys, this is Miss Marcia Jeffries.



  

                   

How do you do?



  

                   

Her uncle owns the radio station

in town, KGRK.



  

                   

She's been doing a programme,

maybe you've heard it...



  

                   

"A face in the crowd". A mighty nice

programme it is, too.



  

                   

I know this is a little unusual...



  

                   

but this morning she's going

to do her programme from here.



  

                   

Miss Jeffries, the jail of Tawny

Hawk County is at your disposal.



  

                   

Itís very simple, you just talk into

this microphone in a natural voice.



  

                   

We'll just chat back and forth.



  

                   

This is completely informal...



  

                   

so if anybody wants to sing a song

or tell an anecdote...



  

                   

a funny story...



  

                   

Let me see. Beanie,

last time you were here...



  

                   

I heard you sing something.



  

                   

I ain't got my teeth with me

this time.



  

                   

This is Radio KGRK, the voice

of North East Arkansas...



  

                   

bringing you its morning feature,

"A face in the crowd".



  

                   

Whose face?

It could be yours.



  

                   

Or yours. People are fascinating

wherever you find them.



  

                   

This is Marcia Jeffries,

looking for more faces...



  

                   

this time from the county jail.

Say something.



  

                   

Don't worry Ma,

everything's fine.



  

                   

Nicest jail I've been in

in this part of the country.



  

                   

Hey you, you can do something.



  

                   

I got black skin,

but I ain't no minstrel.



  

                   

I'm sorry, Miss Jeffries,

they're just an ordinary bunch.



  

                   

Where's the drunk from last night

with the guitar? Whatís his name?



  

                   

- Rhodes. Thatís him lying there...

- Go and wake him up.



  

                   

- Watch him, he's mean.

- Miss Jeffries, we'll wake him up.



  

                   

Hey, wake up!



  

                   

Morning, Mr. Rhodes,

I'm from Radio...



  

                   

Get away! Get away!



  

                   

The sheriff's here.



  

                   

I don't care if the President

is here.



  

                   

If a man can't get a little

decent sleep in jail...



  

                   

Who are you?



  

                   

I'd like to introduce you

to our radio audience.



  

                   

Radio?



  

                   

Join me in a little chat...



  

                   

Wait a minute!



  

                   

quit racing your motor.



  

                   

What do I get out of it?



  

                   

I mean, Me Myself and I.



  

                   

Sheriff?



  

                   

- Whatís he in here for?

- A week, drunk and disorderly.



  

                   

If you'll co-operate, I might

let you out in the morning.



  

                   

Me too, I'm his manager.



  

                   

The boys say you don't keep

your word any too good.



  

                   

You keep your end of the bargain,

I'll keep mine.



  

                   

Well, OK.



  

                   

Itís a deal, tomorrow morning.



  

                   

I'll sing you a song.



  

                   

I went to Sarah Lawrence College,

I majored in music.



  

                   

I learned that real American

music comes from the bottom up.



  

                   

When Gershwin played at the New York

it was black tie music...



  

                   

but the real beginning of it

was in folks that never owned a tie.



  

                   

I just bumped into a fella you

never heard of, Rhodes.



  

                   

Whatís your first name?



  

                   

Jack, or Mack,

whatís the difference?



  

                   

Calls himself "Lonesome Rhodes".



  

                   

Lonesome?



  

                   

Don't be rushing me,

cut that thing off a minute.



  

                   

Give me a chance to lubricate

my Adam's apple.



  

                   

Nothing like a little medicine

to put you in the mood.



  

                   

Ain't mamma a beauty?



  

                   

A guitar beats a woman

any time!



  

                   

I never have seen a woman

I could trust like this old guitar.



  

                   

I love my mamma guitar.



  

                   

She's always waiting for me

to pick her up and hold her.



  

                   

Never asks me for money or goes

cheating around when I ain't looking.



  

                   

If she gets a little sour, I just

give her a little twist like so...



  

                   

and we're right back

in tune together.



  

                   

Hey, Lonesome,

sing "Rye whisky".



  

                   

Lonesome.



  

                   

"Hallelujah, I'm a bum."



  

                   

She can see that plain enough.



  

                   

Whenever a bunch of fellas

like us...



  

                   

outcasts, hobos, nobodies,

gentlemen loafers...



  

                   

one time or all time losers,

call us what you want to...



  

                   

Whenever we get together,

we tell funny stories...



  

                   

me and Beanie

and the rest of these...



  

                   

hand-to-mouth tumbleweed boys

like you see in here.



  

                   

If whisky don't get us,

then women must...



  

                   

and it looks like...



  

                   

I'm never gonna cease...



  

                   

my wandering.



  

                   

But, deep down,

when we get ready...



  

                   

to tuck our heads under our wings

and go to sleep...



  

                   

we ain't kidding ourselves.



  

                   

We're so low-down Ionely...



   

                   

the fella we couldn't stand

the sight of this morning...



   

                   

tonight, when the guards

douse the lights...



   

                   

and plunge us into darkness...



   

                   

why that same fella seems like

our nearest, dearest buddy.



   

                   

Ten thousand miles

away from home.



   

                   

And I don't even know my name.



   

                   

But I ain't crying.



   

                   

No, I ain't crying, because I'm

gonna be a free man in the morning.



   

                   

You hear that, fellas?

A free man!



   

                   

The sheriff's gonna open up

his cage...



   

                   

and I'm gonna be as free

as a bird in the morning.



   

                   

Hey, maybe I can try putting

a couple of rhymes together...



   

                   

Sing something dependable

like "Home on the Range".



   

                   

I ain't gonna sing no

"Home on the Range".



   

                   

No, sir, not if it means

I rot in here another month.



   

                   

I'm gonna sing

what I'm gonna be...



   

                   

a free man in the morning.



   

                   

Oh, good night, moon.



   

                   

Moon, you just fade,

fade, fade away.



   

                   

Oh, good night, moon.



   

                   

Moon, you just fade away.



   

                   

And hurry on, Mr. Sun...



   

                   

bring on the new day.



   

                   

Oh, bring on the sheriff...



   

                   

with his great big old key.



   

                   

Yeah!



   

                   

Bring on old Big Jeff,

the sheriff of Pickett, Arkansas...



   

                   

with his big old fat key.



   

                   

To open up this nasty,

filthy jailhouse...



   

                   

and make a free man of me.



   

                   

You got any objections to

being a free man in the morning?



   

                   

No, sir, I ain't.



   

                   

Gonna be a free man

in the morning...



   

                   

free man in the morning...



   

                   

free man in the morning...



   

                   

I know the reason...



   

                   

All right, I'm ready.



   

                   

Thank you, Lonesome Rhodes,

that was just fine.



   

                   

You mean to tell me you

had that going all the time?



   

                   

I'm a sneaky type.



   

                   

Well, lock me up...



   

                   

- You like him?

- Yes, sir.



   

                   

By golly, I think you've got yourself

quite a fella there, quite a fella.



   

                   

I'd sure like to use him on

our Early Bird Show from   to  .



   

                   

Would you let me, Uncle J. B?



   

                   

Hello, get me the jail, Gladys.



   

                   

- The jail?

- Thatís right, the sheriff.



   

                   

Or should I say, our future mayor.



   

                   

That boy may be bashful, Marcia,

but he's pretty sweet on you.



   

                   

The only thing I'm interested in...



   

                   

is running the best radio programme

in North East Arkansas.



   

                   

Hello, Big Jeff?



   

                   

- Rhodes?

- Yes.



   

                   

Thatís the thing, J. B...



   

                   

I was only holding him

on a drunk and disorderly.



   

                   

You've no idea which way

he was headed?



   

                   

There's only two ways out of town,

and I can hardly see him going west.



   

                   

He'll be on the east road.



   

                   

Letís go after him.



   

                   

There he is.



   

                   

Hey! Morning!



   

                   

We've been looking for you.



   

                   

Yeah? What for?



   

                   

This is my uncle, Mr. Jeffries,

who owns our radio station.



   

                   

Well, how's it feel to be

a free man in the morning?



   

                   

Where you headed now?



   

                   

Port St Joe, Florida.



   

                   

Thatís a long walk.

Whatís down there?



   

                   

Oh, plenty of water and

plenty of fishing bridges...



   

                   

and snapper boats,

and tarpon rolls...



   

                   

You know, I've always wanted

to catch me a tarpon.



   

                   

Whatís to stop you?



   

                   

I can't afford it.



   

                   

I've got a radio station,

newspaper, printing business...



   

                   

I'm president of the Caguanas...



   

                   

I can't afford it.



   

                   

Come on, Beanie.



   

                   

Listen, I ain't got but   or   days

to make it to St. Joe.



   

                   

Unless I steal somebody's car.



   

                   

Wait a minute, we've got a job

for you.



   

                   

Every morning on our station,

  to  .



   

                   

I don't want no job.



   

                   

Why not?



   

                   

Too much like work, man.



   

                   

Do you have any money?



   

                   

Mamma will always get me a meal.

I can sleep in a jail.



   

                   

Come on, try it for a day.



   

                   

How about if you had a plane ticket?

You can put it in your pocket...



   

                   

if you ever want to go,

you just go.



   

                   

Well...



   

                   

OK. I'll try it for one day.



   

                   

I'll turn around.



   

                   

Letís go.



   

                   

Take him to the hotel

and get him a room.



   

                   

And you better clean him up

a bit.



   

                   

See you around, Beanie.



   

                   

Get in the back.



   

                   

Would you mind closing the door?



   

                   

My goodness, ain't we fussy!



   

                   

This wardrobe you got, I think

I better send it to the laundry.



   

                   

I'll wash it myself. That way I can

cut out any time I feel like it.



   

                   

So early in the morning?



   

                   

How would you like to come

and get aquainted...



   

                   

early in the morning?



   

                   

We really do have to hurry.



   

                   

I bet you never sat on bed

with a man before.



   

                   

Really!

Look, I'll meet you downstairs.



   

                   

Ladies,

or I guess I should say, girls...



   

                   

the boss lady just shoved

a piece of paper at me...



   

                   

says I ain't got

but   more minutes.



   

                   

Thatís what I've got

against working...



   

                   

itís tangled up

with the word "hurry".



   

                   

Back in my town,

we had a cousin named Harry...



   

                   

they all called him Hurry 'cause

he was always running someplace.



   

                   

Till one day he fell down a flight

of steps and broke his fool neck.



   

                   

We put a sign on his grave

that said...



   

                   

"He was in such a hurry,

he couldn't wait to get here."



   

                   

Shucks, I was just going to add on

a verse about being a free woman.



   

                   

I bet a lot of you dream of that...



   

                   

with all the breakfast dishes

piling up in the sink...



   

                   

and cranky husbands

to get off to work.



   

                   

Ain't it a shame how they

get on about everything...



   

                   

because they ain't got the gumption

to take it out on their boss?



   

                   

Well, good-bye, dear,

I'm late for work.



   

                   

I hate to talk against

my own kind but I never saw...



   

                   

a man who could appreciate

how hard you women have to work.



   

                   

They think running water over a dish

is all there is to it.



   

                   

They never see you clean the grease

out of the sink...



   

                   

or wiping out of the oven

the gravy...



   

                   

or the apple juice that sizzles over

the side of the dish onto your grill.



   

                   

How would he know that?



   

                   

Listen to this.



   

                   

"Dear Lonesome, though I never

set eyes on you..."



   

                   

Listen. "I know you must be

saintly looking.



   

                   

Only a saint could understand the

burdens of a housewife like you do."



   

                   

They all say the same. They love

his voice, his guitar, his ideas.



   

                   

They should know

some of them.



   

                   

You're not fooling me,

you're proud of him.



   

                   

There hasn't been mail like this

since you started the station.



   

                   

Hello.



   

                   

Hello, Wayne.



   

                   

Oh, so you like the fella?



   

                   

OK, I guess we can put you down

for three one-minute spots.



   

                   

Thanks for calling, bye.



   

                   

Well, advertisers are

actually calling to buy time.



   

                   

This station will make

a little money yet.



   

                   

Go easy on the advertising.

I don't think he wants to stay.



   

                   

Marcia, you found him,

itís your job to get him...



   

                   

Honey, whenever you see

this well running dry...



   

                   

you just come over here again.



   

                   

Thatís right, Lonesome.



   

                   

I'm afraid thatís going

to be your name.



   

                   

My real intimate friends

call me Larry.



   

                   

You can call me Larry.



   

                   

Thatís a good chaser.



   

                   

Did you always drink like that?



   

                   

Not always, back in Riddle

I was pretty straight.



   

                   

I didn't touch hard liquor

till I was    or   .



   

                   

Is there really a town

called Riddle?



   

                   

To tell you the truth itís just

sort of a what do you call it...



   

                   

Composite?



   

                   

Compost heap is more like it.



   

                   

Where are you from?



   

                   

From all over.



   

                   

Any town you mention for     miles,

I lived in a day or two.



   

                   

What did your father do?



   

                   

He was a spieler

with a two-bit con.



   

                   

"Now, if each of you hand me

your $  bills...



   

                   

I'm gonna favour you

with a five dollar gift."



   

                   

Still loved him, didn't you?



   

                   

He left us when I was

knee high to a beer barrel.



   

                   

You mother took care of you?



   

                   

Never mind about her.



   

                   

What about those uncles

you talk about?



   

                   

Uncles?



   

                   

If I'd a nickel for every time I

fell asleep waiting for my old lady.



   

                   

When I'd wake up she'd say,

"Your uncle's sleeping".



   

                   

I'd say "Uncle Lou?"



   

                   

She'd say "No, this is

your Uncle Mike, Uncle Moe".



   

                   

There wasn't a town in Arkansas or

Missouri I didn't have an uncle in.



   

                   

Yes, ma'am. My old lady sure was

generous about taking in relatives.



   

                   

Yet you grew up

so happy-go-lucky.



   

                   

You put your whole self

in that laugh.



   

                   

Marcia, I put my whole self

into everything I do.



   

                   

You turned down my invite

to go out with this tramp?



   

                   

No! Stop it! Stop it!



   

                   

Thanks for the pies, girls.



   

                   

You're going to spoil me.



   

                   

Well, I reckon I've sung at you

enough for one morning.



   

                   

Maybe I'll wind up with a joke.



   

                   

Letís see...



   

                   

Yeah, I got one.



   

                   

Sheriff Big Jeff Bess.



   

                   

You say that ain't no joke?



   

                   

The fact he's running for mayor

strikes me as kind of funny.



   

                   

You know, back in my little town,

Riddle...



   

                   

the way we elect fellas

to office is...



   

                   

we try to figure which fella can

best be spared from useful labour.



   

                   

Like, you take

the village half-wit...



   

                   

Now, in most places, he's going

to be put on town relief...



   

                   

but in Riddle, as an economy measure,

we make him the dog catcher.



   

                   

But, now,

this sheriff of yours...



   

                   

I don't say

nothing against him...



   

                   

but if you've any mutts

you want rid of...



   

                   

why don't you take them to his place

to see if he can handle the job.



   

                   

Here, Whitey!

Here, Whitey!



   

                   

How does it feel?



   

                   

How does what feel?



   

                   

Saying whatever comes in your head

and being able to sway people.



   

                   

Yeah, I guess I can.



   

                   

Yeah, I guess I can.



   

                   

And now, an amusing example of

grass roots democracy in action.



   

                   

It seems there's a small town

radio personality...



   

                   

called "Lonesome Rhodes"

out in Arkansas...



   

                   

who literally sent a mayoralty

candidate to the dogs.



   

                   

Larry, Larry.



   

                   

Just plough out through and keep

going, leave the rest to me.



   

                   

Thanks for bringing up

my breakfast.



   

                   

This is Mr. Steiner,

all the way from Memphis.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes. I'm one of the oldest

theatrical agents in the mid south.



   

                   

I book a lot of acts for

the Grand Old Opera.



   

                   

I discovered Hank Snow,

and Webb Pierce...



   

                   

and the first morning I heard you,

I said to myself...



   

                   

"Steiner, that man's got power."



   

                   

Not just catchy songs

and funny stories, power.



   

                   

How would you like

to come to Memphis, sir?



   

                   

Memphis?



   

                   

You put me in mind of Will Rogers

when he first came to Memphis.



   

                   

I can make you a star, boy,

if you put yourself in my hands.



   

                   

Shucks, I'm just a country boy.



   

                   

I'm not even sure I want to stay

in this radio business.



   

                   

I'm not one of these

hard pressure fellas.



   

                   

But, do you mind

if I call you again?



   

                   

No.



   

                   

Miss Jeffries.



   

                   

Grand Old Opera,

thatís the big time.



   

                   

It never hurt none to play

hard to get.



   

                   

You ought to know that.



   

                   

You don't seem to be pining

for lack of company.



   

                   

I get extra hungry

in the morning.



   

                   

You cold fish respectable girls.



   

                   

Inside you crave the same things

as the rest of them.



   

                   

Tell the truth.



   

                   

You're on in   minutes.



   

                   

Itís so hot this morning,

the creek gave up.



   

                   

I mean it was bone dry.



   

                   

So the young ones figure

they ain't got no place to swim.



   

                   

But my boss...



   

                   

old J.B. Jeffries,

he's got a fine swimming pool...



   

                   

right here in town.



   

                   

So why don't you kids

go to his place for a ducking?



   

                   

J. B will be proud

to have you.



   

                   

Can you hear them?

Can you hear them, splashing?



   

                   

Thatís your curly-headed

little darlings, enjoying...



   

                   

J.B. Jeffries' kind of hospitality.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes, telephone.



   

                   

He's on the air.



   

                   

Itís the Memphis TV Station,

he says Steiner told him about you.



   

                   

Well, shucks, I can talk

to him on the air.



   

                   

All these folks are my friends,

I ain't got nothing to hide.



   

                   

Hello there, partner.



   

                   

Whatís that?



   

                   

You want me to come on TV in

Memphis? With this kisser of mine?



   

                   

All I can say is

you're a brave man.



   

                   

$    a week?



   

                   

Confederate?



   

                   

$   ?



   

                   

We can do better than that.



   

                   

Partner, leaving Pickett is like

leaving my own flesh and blood.



   

                   

Now, if I've got to take leave

of these good folks...



   

                   

I'd rather try it for nothing

for a couple of weeks...



   

                   

and if you ain't satisfied,

or if I get homesick for Arkansas...



   

                   

back I come and

nobody gets hurt.



   

                   

But, if we find we get along...



   

                   

you make it

a $     a week.



   

                   

Yeah, you get the idea.



   

                   

And transportation for yours truly

and my little Girl Friday...



   

                   

not to mention Monday, Tuesday,

Wednesday, Thursday, Marcia Jeffries.



   

                   

I'm glad you're going with him,

take care of him.



   

                   

I'll sure try.



   

                   

Take good care of yourself.



   

                   

Marcia!



   

                   

Come on, honey.

We'll be late, come on.



   

                   

The train will leave,

come on.



   

                   

Bye!



   

                   

Bye Lucy, so long, Luther,

you write to me now.



   

                   

I'll be thinking of you.



   

                   

Am I glad to shake that dump!



   

                   

I was only kidding, honey...



   

                   

you should know me better

than to believe everything I say.



   

                   

Bye! Bye!



   

                   

Good-bye and God bless

you good people!



   

                   

If I'd known you'd put lipstick

on me, I'd have never come.



   

                   

Stop complaining,

you look beautiful.



   

                   

This is Mel Miller, the station's

assigned him as your writer.



   

                   

Writer?



   

                   

You're gonna have an easy job.

I don't do much reading.



   

                   

I just work out the continuity.



   

                   

What are you, eastern college?



   

                   

No, I went to school

in Nashville.



   

                   

I was Vanderbilt   .



   

                   

OK, Vanderbilt   .



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes, we're ready for you.



   

                   

Hey, what are you doing

to that make-up?



   

                   

   seconds, ready on one,

stand by two...



   

                   

Just be natural, easy

and relax, real country.



   

                   

When that red light is on,

that camera is on you.



   

                   

Now, put this in your mouth.



   

                   

I think that straw's gonna be

a nice touch.



   

                   

Here he is, a newcomer

to Memphis Television...



   

                   

but sure to become an old friend.



   

                   

"A face in the crowd",

starring that Arkansas traveller...



   

                   

Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

What do you want?



   

                   

Howdy.



   

                   

I've never seen myself

on one of these things before.



   

                   

So if I start admiring myself

on this...



   

                   

What do you call it?



   

                   

Monitor.



   

                   

Monitor. Show folks

what I'm talking about, will you?



   

                   

The director said

all I had to do was...



   

                   

He said I had to act like

I was looking straight at you...



   

                   

but he forgot to say there'd be

a redeye looking straight at me.



   

                   

You know, it does look

kind of familiar though...



   

                   

It reminds me of my Uncle Ivan

after a night of drinking...



   

                   

that fine old five star

corn liquor.



   

                   

He put a star on the bottle

for every day it aged.



   

                   

If the ocean was moonshine

and I was a duck...



   

                   

I'd dive...



   

                   

I'm too tired

to sing this morning.



   

                   

Whatís the matter with you

big city fellas anyhow?



   

                   

Don't you ever go to bed

around here?



   

                   

Last night, I settled down

for my    hour nap in the hotel...



   

                   

and moly hoses, what a honking...



   

                   

and lights a-flashing and

girls a-giggling on the street!



   

                   

So I called the desk on the telephone

they've got in every room.



   

                   

"Whatís going on?" I said...



   

                   

"It ain't New Year's Eve,

by any chance?"



   

                   

"No," he said...



   

                   

"Itís just ten o'clock at night

in Memphis".



   

                   

So I pulled back on my duds and went

out to see what the commotion was.



   

                   

Hey, Mr. Cameraman,

move that redeye a little closer.



   

                   

He's already telling us what to do.



   

                   

I want to talk face to face

with my friends out there.



   

                   

Which one of these holes

do I look in?



   

                   

One thing I could see right off

about a big city...



   

                   

there's a whole lot of people

in trouble out there.



   

                   

You don't see it much in the daytime

when everyone's hustling around...



   

                   

rushing from where they is

to where they ain't...



   

                   

but itís at night,

late at night...



   

                   

around   o'clock in the morning

itís what I call "the dividing line".



   

                   

All you've got left

is folks in trouble.



   

                   

I'm gonna tell you people something

happened to me this morning.



   

                   

I'm going to tell you, and see if

it don't happen to you the same way.



   

                   

If it don't move your hearts...



   

                   

you're just a bunch of

big city pickle hearts.



   

                   

I'll pack up my one shirt and

the Bible my daddy gave me...



   

                   

and my cigar box guitar...



   

                   

and I'll just get me

on home to Riddle.



   

                   

Itís true about the one shirt,

but I've yet to see the Bible.



   

                   

The way he talks about the night,

I couldn't write it that well.



   

                   

Come out here.



   

                   

Don't be scared of this,

at least no more than I am.



   

                   

A coloured woman.

In Memphis, that takes nerve.



   

                   

I told you, he's his own man.



   

                   

You just tell folks

the same thing you told me.



   

                   

You see, itís my house...



   

                   

It burnt down.

She's got seven young ones...



   

                   

Helen, look what they're having

on television, now.



   

                   

Itís about time.



   

                   

She just walked around, because

she didn't have no place else to go.



   

                   

I didn't know a single

living soul in Memphis.



   

                   

Are you kidding?



   

                   

I bet you've got      

friends out there.



   

                   

Each one will prove it

by sending bucks...



   

                   

so you can build a decent house

for those brats of yours.



   

                   

Now, please, noboby send in

more than $ .  ...



   

                   

you might not be able to spare it.



   

                   

If you've got over $  

cut in for that house of hers.



   

                   

They're gonna be looking out for you,

ain't you, folks?



   

                   

Lonesome! You should see how

the money is pouring in!



   

                   

Get out of bed,

you've got a client!



   

                   

Whatís that?



   

                   

Itís a mattress company,

that means you get your $    .



   

                   

Stand still, you slob.



   

                   

Here, get your hand in here.



   

                   

Here it comes.



   

                   

That sure is prettier music than

a cigar box guitar.



   

                   

There's eighteen thousand

five hundred...



   

                   

and forty-one...



   

                   

of these things so far,

and we ain't hardly started.



   

                   

Mrs. Tooley says thank you...



   

                   

you good people.



   

                   

You folks are building a house.



   

                   

Ain't nothing you can't do when you

let the best side of you take over.



   

                   

Oh, I see the old clock-watcher

going this way.



   

                   

He wants me to make sure

I leave time for the commercial.



   

                   

You didn't know I had a sponsor,

did you?



   

                   

Neither did I till I woke up

this morning.



   

                   

He's a good looking scoundrel,

ain't he?



   

                   

What?



   

                   

Yeah, I've got the commercial

on me somewhere. Letís see...



   

                   

Johnny Longshotís tip

for the Daily Double...



   

                   

No. No, that ain't it.



   

                   

"Lonesome...



   

                   

darling, you ain't forgetting

your little Arkansas Annie...?



   

                   

No, that surely ain't it.



   

                   

This is it.



   

                   

Friends "comma" why not invest

in sleep insurance "question mark".



   

                   

That is what you will be doing

when you buy your...



   

                   

Luffler Easy-Rest

mattress "period".



   

                   

It comes in six tasty flavours...



   

                   

Well, thatís about enough

commercials.



   

                   

Personally, when I'm dog-tired,

I sleep on the floor.



   

                   

One of the best nightís sleep

I ever had was in a box car.



   

                   

They say that a firm mattress

is better for your spine...



   

                   

but if you follow that, ain't it

better just to sleep on the floor?



   

                   

But, if you softies insist

on sleeping on a bed...



   

                   

I reckon you can do worse

than a Luffler Easy-Rest.



   

                   

End of commercial.



   

                   

Maybe also the end

of Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Seriously, I was on the phone

with Mr. Luffler for half an hour.



   

                   

I'm sure he's seen us

and hasn't even looked around.



   

                   

He's got a loophole

in his contract...



   

                   

and if you kill his commercial once

more, he'll walk right through it.



   

                   

Hi there, Lonesome.

Hey!



   

                   

Boy, I almost forgot.



   

                   

I got those tickets for the plug

you gave this morning.



   

                   

I guess you didn't know

I do a little shlockmeistering.



   

                   

Shlockmeistering!



   

                   

You just slip in a remark about these

products and they pay you in kind.



   

                   

A case of beer, free drinks

at the Elrose Cafe, all that jazz...



   

                   

I tell you, it mounts up.



   

                   

Isn't that illegal? Stealing time

from regular sponsors?



   

                   

Illegal?



   

                   

Honey, nothing's illegal

if they don't catch you.



   

                   

See you, Joe.



   

                   

OK, see you around.



   

                   

Who was that?



   

                   

Joe, Luffler's office boy.



   

                   

He won't be an office boy long.



   

                   

Mr. Luffler doesn't like what

I said about his mattress.



   

                   

Shucks, I said you could get a good

nightís sleep on one of them...



   

                   

if you're real tired.



   

                   

There I go again.



   

                   

I just can't get my mouth around

the things they want me to say.



   

                   

But, I'll try.



   

                   

And now, a message of importance.



   

                   

Now, you good people ain't so dumb

you don't know whatís important.



   

                   

The atom bomb's important,

things like that.



   

                   

A Luffler mattress

won't break your back...



   

                   

but it sure ain't no

world-shaking message.



   

                   

Just in case you won't be seeing me

again... Fellas, come on.



   

                   

Here's a little song

to remember me by.



   

                   

Give me an "E"...



   

                   

Well, good-bye, Mr. Luffler,

and thanks for the ride...



   

                   

I'd like to have your money,

but I'd rather have my pride.



   

                   

On this corny old commercial

we just cannot agree...



   

                   

so you can tear up my contract...



   

                   

make a free man of me!



   

                   

Going to be...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

I know the reason why.



   

                   

Yes, Mr. Luffler.



   

                   

Get me my lawyer.



   

                   

Yes.



   

                   

Who is it?



   

                   

Itís me, Lonesome.

Larry.



   

                   

I've come to say good-bye.



   

                   

Just a minute.



   

                   

I just wanted to say

I'm gonna hit the road.



   

                   

Where to?



   

                   

Whatís the difference?

For Mr. Luffler.



   

                   

He's firing me unless I promise to

show him my scripts in advance.



   

                   

There ain't no script,

I'm just me.



   

                   

Stay. Even after what you

did for Mrs Tooley?



   

                   

I'm not my brother's keeper.



   

                   

You are and you don't know it.



   

                   

I don't cow tow to

no mattress company.



   

                   

See you in jail, sometime.



   

                   

We shook them up a little bit.

Had a run for our money.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

Come here.



   

                   

Did I call you a cold fish,

Marcia?



   

                   

Marcia...



   

                   

itís short for marshmallow.



   

                   

My little marshmallow.



   

                   

This way, please.



   

                   

Joey, the boss wants you.



   

                   

Thatís terrible.



   

                   

Mr. Luffler, since you hired

Lonesome Rhodes...



   

                   

up to an including yesterday,

our sales have increased   ļ/ļ.



   

                   

I smell smoke.



   

                   

I know he's hurt your feelings, but

as a merchandise man I must say...



   

                   

that a   ļ/ļ jump in sales

is quite a painkiller.



   

                   

- I'll think it over.

- You called for me?



   

                   

Yes.

I can always get him back!



   

                   

For the credit department.



   

                   

Yes, sir.



   

                   

Joey...



   

                   

You're a smart lad.



   

                   

Do you think I acted hasty

in firing him?



   

                   

I wouldn't let anyone

ridicule my product.



   

                   

Your wife on one.



   

                   

Yes, dear?



   

                   

Would you mind

your own business dear?



   

                   

Would you tell the Ladies' Garden

Club to mind its own business?



   

                   

Credit department. Get me Browning,

Schlegel and McNally in New York.



   

                   

Don't worry, itís kosher, Luffler

gave me a message for them.



   

                   

Do you know the number?



   

                   

Itís the biggest ad agency

in New York.



   

                   

Browning, Schlegel and McNally,

try information.



   

                   

Browning, Schlegel and McNally,

long distance from Memphis?



   

                   

Just a moment.



   

                   

A Mr. Joseph De Palma, from Memphis,

he represents Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Itís a crazy business we're in.



   

                   

This is about some joker called

Lonesome Rhodes on a local Memphis...



   

                   

Hey, he topped both CBS and NBC

down there.



   

                   

Hello. Mr. De Palma?



   

                   

Hello, I just thought

I'd let you know...



   

                   

that Lonesome Rhodes

is being flooded with offers.



   

                   

If you happen to be interested,

  o'clock is our deadline.



   

                   

All right.

I'll call you back at five.



   

                   

Five. Well, my pleasure.



   

                   

I caught that show on my vacation,

he's a living doll.



   

                   

Could be.



   

                   

EBDNO, in New York City.



   

                   

Marcia.



   

                   

Marcia?



   

                   

You told me to pick you up

in time for the show.



   

                   

Hey, have you seen Lonesome?



   

                   

You'll find him in there.



   

                   

In here?



   

                   

Oh, you mean in here?



   

                   

I wouldn't barge in there

if I were you.



   

                   

I'm not you.

Hey, hey, Lonesome!



   

                   

Lonesome, boy, hey!



   

                   

Yeah, yeah, who is it?



   

                   

Itís destiny, thatís who it is.



   

                   

Joe Destiny. Hi.



   

                   

Child, I sold your show.



   

                   

To the big time.



   

                   

You wouldn't know it,

THE advertising company.



   

                   

I got them bidding against

the Cutler Agency, MCA...



   

                   

Who?



   

                   

and a dozen others you won't know.

Look...



   

                   

BSNM wants you for primetime.

  o'clock, coast to coast.



   

                   

I told them we'd let them know

at   .   hours.



   

                   

Boy, I tell you,

we're on to New York.



   

                   

We are?



   

                   

They asked me if you had a New York

agent. Would you like to meet him?



   

                   

A bum out of jail in Pickett,

Arkansas...



   

                   

and a Memphis office boy!



   

                   

Go, baby!



   

                   

Yes, sir! Go, daddy-o!



   

                   

Hey, will you sign this?



   

                   

Thank you.



   

                   

Now, in the last quarter, gentlemen,

and Miss Valerie...



   

                   

we have spent over $      

of General Hainsworth's money...



   

                   

to make this country

Vitajex conscious.



   

                   

And all we've succeeded in doing...

Next chart, please...



   

                   

is dropping from   ļ/ļ of the market

to  ļ/ļ. Now I...



   

                   

Mr. Macey, I'm late for the dog food

meeting. Can I say my say and go?



   

                   

Yes.



   

                   

I've gone over this product

pretty carefully in the lab.



   

                   

Vitajex has a few grains

of aspirin...



   

                   

a little sugar, that might

give you some energy...



   

                   

but, frankly,

General or no General...



   

                   

we've nothing to sell.



   

                   

Strike that from the transcript,

Miss Murray.



   

                   

You know General Hainsworth always

reads the product group reports.



   

                   

I can't help it, I was hired

as a research chemist.



   

                   

Dr. Wiley, there's nothing wrong

with Vitajex, is there?



   

                   

It won't kill you,

if thatís what you mean.



   

                   

Itís relatively harmless,

like a patent medicine...



   

                   

Thank you, doctor. Now, letís

get this train back on the tracks.



   

                   

With all due respect to our

estimable television department...



   

                   

He hates our guts.



   

                   

and itís sudden enthusiasm...



   

                   

for Lonesome Rhodes...



   

                   

I think we need a dignified sell.



   

                   

I'd like a    minute participation

on the Ed Murrow show.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes is here, sir.



   

                   

Don't you think...

I mean, itís irregular.



   

                   

I just thought if you and the boys

got a look at him...



   

                   

you'd see why the TV shop

is sold on him.



   

                   

Gentlemen, Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Hi, folks.



   

                   

Howdy.



   

                   

I'm here to sell these kidney pills

or whatever the heck they are.



   

                   

Hey, whatís the matter?

You got no spittoons around here?



   

                   

Denise, would you bring

the gentleman a spittoon?



   

                   

Now, whatís your particular

problem, Mr. Fuzzy Lip?



   

                   

Sit down, Mr. Rhodes.

You may as well know...



   

                   

Vitajex is the sick sister in

the International Drug family.



   

                   

They're getting ready

to put out a smaller pill...



   

                   

Jim, before we make

any hasty decisions...



   

                   

Look at these poor little

white pills you're trying to peddle.



   

                   

They're kind of pale,

got no charge to them.



   

                   

I got an idea.

Letís make them yellow.



   

                   

The colour of sunshine

and energy.



   

                   

Gives a fella the get up and go

that sets him up with the ladies.



   

                   

I guess...



   

                   

if you want to be bright-eyed

and bushy-tailed...



   

                   

just gobble up a handful of Vitajex

and your battery's charged. Watch.



   

                   

I am ready!



   

                   

I mean, I am in the mood!



   

                   

My personality undergoes

a startling change.



   

                   

I got your spittoon...



   

                   

I'm going to get you,

you little redhead!



   

                   

Thatís what Vitajex does to me and

I haven't even swallowed them yet.



   

                   

You college geniuses want

dignity on your programme.



   

                   

Where I come from,

a fella looks too dignified...



   

                   

he's looking to steal your watch!

I'll move your merchandise!



   

                   

Peace.



   

                   

Peace.



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

You fill me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Oh...



   

                   

Vitajex...



   

                   

Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

You fill me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Keep your eye on that rating.



   

                   

Do it again.

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Fills you full of...



   

                   

And each pill contains    units...



   

                   

of energy-giving endrocaine.



   

                   

Vitajex, jex, jex

makes you go, go, go!



   

                   

Keep your eye on that rating.



   

                   

Thatís why Vitajex

gives you that get up and go.



   

                   

Do you have trouble with your girl?

Does she look elsewhere?



   

                   

Here's how Vitajex

solved his problem.



   

                   

Vitajex!



   

                   

It fills me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

See what I mean?



   

                   

This is General Hainsworth.



   

                   

I've just seen Lonesome

on the television, and I like him.



   

                   

Why don't you take Vitajex...



   

                   

like Lonesome Rhodes does?



   

                   

She's talking about the new

large economy size.



   

                   

I bought my boyfriend

a ten year supply.



   

                   

Now, the soft sell.



   

                   

- Keep your eye on the ratings.

- Vitajex, Vitajex, Vitajex.



   

                   

Vitajex, what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Now, the hard sell.



   

                   

Vitajex,   . .



   

                   

General, I'm willing

to put myself on record.



   

                   

I say he's a risk, uncooperative

and unpredictable.



   

                   

We've spent tens of thousands

to find out the key words...



   

                   

like "racing" and "zestful".



   

                   

Rhodes has the audacity to tear us

to shreds in front of the audience.



   

                   

  . .



   

                   

General, where are you?



   

                   

If you'll forgive us,

we have to get back to town.



   

                   

Why, hello, girls!



   

                   

How's Princeton   

and the old lady?



   

                   

Afraid I'm making these

fellas unhappy.



   

                   

I'm not in the business

to make them happy...



   

                   

but of putting the public in

the frame of mind to buy Vitajex.



   

                   

Exactly.



   

                   

Excuse us, dear. Poor Mace,

he's already had one heart attack...



   

                   

and you're winding him up

to another.



   

                   

Well, thatís his hard luck.



   

                   

Hello, Senator!

Did you have a fine flight?



   

                   

Splendid! Splendid. I'll join you

when I get freshened up a bit.



   

                   

My guest, Senator Fuller, I'd like

to see him in the White House.



   

                   

Don't they call him

the last of the Isolationists?



   

                   

Maybe, in some of those

left-wing papers.



   

                   

Rhodes, I want you to get to know

people like that.



   

                   

I'd like to take you under my wing

and educate you.



   

                   

Shucks, general,

I'm just a country boy.



   

                   

Young man, never forget

Will Rogers.



   

                   

He was just a gum chewing

rope twirling cowboy...



   

                   

but he got to where he was

telling off presidents and kings.



   

                   

General, my thinking is the second

section of the same train.



   

                   

I've always gone in for

long range planning.



   

                   

Right now, Lonesome

is merely popular, very popular...



   

                   

but Lonesome Rhodes could be

made into an influence.



   

                   

A wielder of opinion,

an institution...



   

                   

positively sacred to his country,

like the Washington monument.



   

                   

I suspect your idealistic young lady

disagrees with me...



   

                   

but my study of history

has convinced me...



   

                   

that in every strong society

from the Egyptians on...



   

                   

the mass had to be guided

with a strong hand...



   

                   

by a responsible elite.



   

                   

Let us not forget that in TV

we have the greatest instrument...



   

                   

for mass persuasion

in the history of the world.



   

                   

I don't mean

to flatter you, sir...



   

                   

What? Oh, yes. Well, letís

have a go at it, shall we?



   

                   

Roger, Roger!



   

                   

Are you jotting this down?



   

                   

First, I'll see if I can sell Henry

on the idea of a "Life" cover.



   

                   

Remind me to call him for lunch.



   

                   

I proudly dedicate to you...



   

                   

the latest hybrid iris

of our horticultural laboratory.



   

                   

The "Unusfloratorum"...



   

                   

We girls call it

"The Lonesome Rhodes".



   

                   

I christen thee

the "USS Rhodes".



   

                   

And so, on behalf of our

great commonwealth...



   

                   

I'm proud to dedicate

one of nature's wonders...



   

                   

henceforth and forever

to be known as...



   

                   

"Mount Rhodes".



   

                   

And now, Lonesome,

back in those difficult days...



   

                   

you had a pal.



   

                   

We flew him to New York tonight...



   

                   

to help recall the struggle

and joys of times gone by.



   

                   

Because, Lonesome Rhodes,

you lived it!



   

                   

Hey, Lonesome!



   

                   

Beanie!



   

                   

You old scoundrel,

where have you been?



   

                   

Here, go out and get yourself

some good liquor.



   

                   

Thank you, New York,

thank you, thank you!



   

                   

Hey, listen to this...



   

                   

The boys in our ward

at the Veterans' hospital...



   

                   

just got together

and donated $ .  .



   

                   

You ask me how I can keep going

   hours without sleep?



   

                   

Man, this is better than sleep!



   

                   

Didn't I tell you, kid?

Didn't I tell you?



   

                   

Do you still want me

to hold this sign?



   

                   

As general manager of

the Sherry Towers...



   

                   

itís my honour to present you

with a gold key...



   

                   

to the two top floors of

New York's finest hotel.



   

                   

To the very top!



   

                   

You can't get much higher.



   

                   

Hello.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

What time is it?



   

                   

Marcia, you've got to come over.



   

                   

I never shoulÔve let Joe sell me the

idea of a penthouse over the offices.



   

                   

   rooms to be alone in.



   

                   

I feel like a shipwrecked fella

on an island.



   

                   

Larry, I know that island,

itís populated with friendly girls.



   

                   

Marcia, honey, believe me,

itís a matter of life and death.



   

                   

Call me soon, doll.



   

                   

Larry?



   

                   

If you don't come

I'll dive off the balcony...



   

                   

and I'm ten blocks from the lake.



   

                   

Marcia, come out here.



   

                   

I had a girl up here tonight.



   

                   

I get restless.



   

                   

I lied to you. When itís over

I'm Ionelier than I was before.



   

                   

Come out here a minute.



   

                   

Look at all those TV aerials

sticking up like branches.



   

                   

There's a whole forest of them

from here to San Diego.



   

                   

All waiting to hear

what I have to say.



   

                   

Is that why you woke me

in the middle of the night?



   

                   

What I'm trying to say is all them

millions of people believing it...



   

                   

doing what I tell them to...



   

                   

scares me.



   

                   

The General and all them big-shots

trying to educate me.



   

                   

Educate, or use you?



   

                   

Thatís it, the General says

the country needs me.



   

                   

I'm supposed to be an influence.



   

                   

Itís mighty tall grass, Marcia.



   

                   

We're getting in deep, Marcia.



   

                   

Deeper than we ever dreamed

when we started out in Arkansas.



   

                   

I know I act like I just ate the

western hemisphere for breakfast.



   

                   

But, down here in the boiler room,

I know I need advice.



   

                   

And not the kind I get from Joey,

or the Madison Avenue lot...



   

                   

who'll betray me

as soon as my back is turned.



   

                   

No, I know when I come

to the top of a mountain...



   

                   

I need you.



   

                   

Because you're level with me.



   

                   

You're my lifeline to truth.



   

                   

Well...



   

                   

marry me, Marcia.



   

                   

Please?



   

                   

Thatís what I called you

over here for.



   

                   

Can't keep anything alive up here.



   

                   

Dust in this city kills everything.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

Don't play with me.



   

                   

Don't hurt me.



   

                   

Don't hurt me.



   

                   

Marcia, there's a lady to see you.



   

                   

A lady?



   

                   

She's got a dress on.



   

                   

I don't want to see anybody.



   

                   

OK, I'll tell her to move it out.



   

                   

I'm sorry ma'am...



   

                   

Are you the...



   

                   

I am Mrs. Rhodes.



   

                   

Are you related to Mr. Rhodes?



   

                   

But, you're not his mother?



   

                   

His wife.



   

                   

All right, Beanie.



   

                   

Isn't he something?



   

                   

Do you turn this down a little?



   

                   

So...



   

                   

You're Lonesome's new tootsie?



   

                   

Lonesome, thatís a hot one.



   

                   

I hope you had better luck

keeping him Ionesome than I did.



   

                   

You should understand that I'm just

a business associate of Mr. Rhodes.



   

                   

Ain't you something!



   

                   

The floor manager of your programme

is my brother in law's first cousin.



   

                   

He told me where I could find you.



   

                   

So you come off it, little lady.



   

                   

Do you mind...?



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes might have done me

the courtesy of telling me himself.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes don't do no courtesies

to nobody.



   

                   

I could write a book about him.



   

                   

Is the purpose of your visit

to collect material?



   

                   

Oh, I came to collect,

but it ain't material.



   

                   

Unless you get Larry to pay me

three grand a month...



   

                   

not only will I not divorce him...



   

                   

but I'll make it plenty hot

for the both of you.



   

                   

I already got some feelings

from confidential magazines.



   

                   

I'm not engaged to your husband.



   

                   

Larry thinks he has to take a bite

out of every broad he comes across.



   

                   

Then he calls them a tramp,

drops them...



   

                   

all sort of psycho-something

or other, you know?



   

                   

I caught him red-handed

with my best girlfriend.



   

                   

He broke my jaw.



   

                   

Seems to be working quite

effectively now.



   

                   

Mrs. Rhodes, if you'll excuse me,

I'm very busy this morning.



   

                   

Well, tell Larry,   G a month,

and he's yours.



   

                   

An old fashioned marriage...



   

                   

is my favourite marriage.



   

                   

Itís a sincere type song.

Should be a big hit.



   

                   

An old fashioned kiss

needs a silvery...



   

                   

Oh, shut up!



   

                   

The Backward Barons are

rehearsing our new theme song.



   

                   

Very catchy.



   

                   

Lonesome wrote it.



   

                   

Actually, two fellas wrote it.

Of course, their names aren't on it.



   

                   

General,

we wanted to show you this.



   

                   

Lonesome designed it himself,

the reaction machine.



   

                   

You just push these little levers,

it can laugh.



   

                   

Giggle.



   

                   

"Ah".



   

                   

- Ain't that good?

- Most ingenious.



   

                   

We're thinking of putting them

on the market.



   

                   

A Lonesome Rhodes

automatic reactor.



   

                   

Mechanical laughter and applause,

what are we coming to?



   

                   

We're coming to a bigger model.



   

                   

I'm sorry to end this,

itís most interesting...



   

                   

but I've got a date at my club,

lunch with Senator Fuller.



   

                   

Whatís the matter?



   

                   

General, I wish you had time

to see our whole operation.



   

                   

You're wound tighter than a clock,

whatís up?



   

                   

Next time you propose, you might

consider getting unmarried first.



   

                   

Listen, Beanie told me,

it ain't as bad as you think.



   

                   

I got a divorce, a couple

of years ago in Mexico.



   

                   

But the judge got indicted for fraud

so my ex claimed...



   

                   

The latest ratings, Mr. Rhodes.



   

                   

Hallelujah!



   

                   

Rhodes,   . .

Opposition,   . .



   

                   

That other fella's gonna be

jumping out of windows.



   

                   

So, like I say, the ex claimed

the divorce was a fraud too...



   

                   

I've got a good lawyer

working it out in Juarez.



   

                   

If I go down there, he'll

get it off my back in    hours.



   

                   

Don't play with me,

I'm not one of your girls.



   

                   

On a stack of Bibles, Marcia.



   

                   

Saturday I'm going to be in Pickett

judging the drum majorette contest.



   

                   

I'll go straight

from there to Mexico.



   

                   

Next time you hear from me,

itíll be from Juarez, believe me.



   

                   

That is just dreadful...



   

                   

"We also take in laundry."

Thatís a new one.



   

                   

Welcome to the black hole

of Calcutta.



   

                   

This is one place they

didn't show the General.



   

                   

Naturally, here are the lepers

of the great TV industry...



   

                   

men without faces.



   

                   

They even slide our cheques under

the door to pretend we're not here.



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Think of the satisfaction

of being a small cog...



   

                   

in the great wheel of humanity

"Lonesome Rhodes".



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Sounds like she's coming over

to our side.



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Why don't you quit?



   

                   

Why don't you quit?



   

                   

I'm deeply involved with him.



   

                   

Spoken like a lady.



   

                   

Got his introduction ready?



   

                   

Home town boy, not only making

good, but making everybody.



   

                   

For a mild man,

you sound vicious.



   

                   

Didn't you know?

All mild men are vicious.



   

                   

They hate themselves for being mild

and the extroverts whose violence...



   

                   

has a strange attraction for

nice girls who should know better.



   

                   

Today, "A face in the crowd"

takes you on a sentimental journey...



   

                   

as Lonesome Rhodes, your old

Arkansas traveller goes home...



   

                   

to the typical dirt road

cotton-picking town of Pickett.



   

                   

Where America's favourite country

cousin got his humble start...



   

                   

he now returns to the simple folk

who loved him first.



   

                   

The latest face in the crowd,

the lucky, talented girl...



   

                   

whom he will select from

hundreds of contestants...



   

                   

as Miss Arkansas Drum Majorette

of     .



   

                   

And here's the man

you've been waiting for...



   

                   

Look at them.

Look at them!



   

                   

Ain't that the most?



   

                   

I mean the most!



   

                   

Fantastic.



   

                   

Country people.



    

                   

The heart of America,

the salt of the earth.



    

                   

Hey, Beanie, L.R.!



    

                   

"We love L.R.".



    

                   

Lonesome!



    

                   

Hi, you all!



    

                   

Itís dangerous.



    

                   

What, baton twirling?



    

                   

No, power.



    

                   

You've got to be a saint to stand

the power that box gives you.



    

                   

Oh, itís wonderful!



    

                   

She's only seventeen.



    

                   

She looks like a very sweet child.



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

my heart is too full...



    

                   

to say anything more...



    

                   

than welcome back

to Pickett.



    

                   

A great artist...



    

                   

a great humanitarian...



    

                   

a great American.



    

                   

Our very own

Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

fellow Arkansasians,

fellow Americans...



    

                   

I know I should start off

with a funny story...



    

                   

about my kin folk in Riddle...



    

                   

but I just feel too humble

this afternoon...



    

                   

as I look out on this fine

representative body...



    

                   

of wholesome young

American womanhood.



    

                   

You know I've been a fan

of baton swirling from way back.



    

                   

I think itís a honest to God

American art form.



    

                   

Here's a number I just recorded

for the Golden Oak Label.



    

                   

You kids might enjoy

twirling to it.



    

                   

Here she goes,

"Mamma guitar"!



    

                   

Oh, yeah.

Our first contestant will be...



    

                   

Miss Suzanne McKinley

of Beagelstown...



    

                   

letís have a real doozie, Suzie!



    

                   

And now, Miss Linda Bruce

from Ganderstown.



    

                   

Go, girl, go!



    

                   

From the town of Snakebite...



    

                   

Miss Peggy May Hardy.



    

                   

Letís see you twirl it

and swirl it Peggy May!



    

                   

I give you

Miss Mary Jane Johnson...



    

                   

from the neighbouring village

of Pocahontas.



    

                   

And now,

Miss Betty Lou Fleckum.



    

                   

And I say, that the winner...



    

                   

by unanimous decision

and thatís me...



    

                   

is little Miss Betty Lou Fleckum!

Miss Arkansas Drum Majorette...



    

                   

of     !



    

                   

I'm so excited...



    

                   

I'm sorry.



    

                   

You're my idol, honest.



    

                   

I pasted your picture

on the ceiling over my bed...



    

                   

so you're the first thing I see

when I wake up in the morning.



    

                   

Well, bless your heart.



    

                   

- What will you have?

- Water, I have a family.



    

                   

- Hello.

- Mace, good show.



    

                   

Yes, I think it went well.



    

                   

Hi, Beryl.



    

                   

Mace, that baton bit

was the living end.



    

                   

Thanks.



    

                   

As Lonesome said,

itís an American art form.



    

                   

A glass of water, Joe.



    

                   

Oh, peach of a show, Miss Jeffries.



    

                   

Should boost the ratings.



    

                   

Poor Macey.



    

                   

Lives on a diet of hydroglycerine

and ratings.



    

                   

Call it a Bible, but itís really

a death warrant with decimal points.



    

                   

- Here you are, sir.

- Thanks.



    

                   

Miss J, this just came for you.



    

                   

Being in this place

is just like being in the office.



    

                   

Not quite. Joe, two more, please

and this time would you just...



    

                   

let the vermouth blow a kiss

at the gin?



    

                   

Our barefoot boy won't be flying in

tonight. He's hopping over to Juarez.



    

                   

"Get Arthur Godfrey to fill in,

I'll do the same for him someday.



    

                   

Counting on you to hold the fort."



    

                   

This shoulder's getting a permanent

callus from holding that fort.



    

                   

Whatís in Juarez?



    

                   

Bars...



    

                   

lawyers, quick marriages...



    

                   

quick divorces.



    

                   

Then, this is it?



    

                   

You're blushing.



    

                   

Sixty to one martinis.



    

                   

I suppose I should be a gentleman

and wish you all the happiness.



    

                   

I think I'll just be a cad and hope

he chokes on a Vitajex pill.



    

                   

You look nice.



    

                   

Larry!



    

                   

Make sure you get the bride.



    

                   

This is great stuff.



    

                   

Officer, I'm his fiancťe.



    

                   

- Did you say married?

- Sure did.



    

                   

This lady had done me the honour

of becoming Mrs. Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

We did it in Juarez.



    

                   

Easy, fellas, I just got her.



    

                   

Where are you going?



    

                   

Miss, I'm Earl Wilson,

what are your measurements?



    

                   

Hey, what are you trying to do?

Are you out of your mind?



    

                   

Get it up there.

Thatís it.



    

                   

Their names are Kiko and Pico.



    

                   

Kiko and Pico!



    

                   

Well, here she is.



    

                   

My little Arkansas sweet potato,

Betty Lou.



    

                   

I ain't been so happy since the day

I fell into Grandpa's corn liquor...



    

                   

and just guzzled my way

down to dry land.



    

                   

I don't reckon I'll be a free man

tomorrow morning.



    

                   

But if this ain't freedom...



    

                   

man, itís the next best thing.



    

                   

And now...



    

                   

you want to see

what first caught my eye?



    

                   

And what second caught my eye?



    

                   

And what keeps on...



    

                   

and on catching my eyes?



    

                   

Ladies and gentlemen...



    

                   

I give you

Mrs. Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Doing her unbelievable...



    

                   

double five baton

twirling dance...



    

                   

to the scherzo

from the  th Symphony...



    

                   

by Ludwig van Beethoven.



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes...



    

                   

could I talk to you

for just a minute, please?



    

                   

I told you I didn't want you agents

nagging me.



    

                   

I've been with Browning, Schlegal

and McNally for    years...



    

                   

in charge of the

International Drug account.



    

                   

The General just told me

he's taking his business away.



    

                   

Your young Mr. De Palma

has wormed his way in...



    

                   

Look, Macey, Joe De Palma's

doing a heck of a job for me.



    

                   

But, you know this business,

itís cut-throat...



    

                   

Look, Macey...



    

                   

If a rating nose-dives

or if you lose a client...



    

                   

even if it isn't your fault,

the executive has to go.



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes, if I lose this account,

I'll be fired.



    

                   

I've got a son in Princeton...



    

                   

Rhodes, you've seen my...

You've seen my office...



    

                   

A corner office

with four windows.



    

                   

Do you know how long it

takes to get a corner...?



    

                   

I was afraid to marry you,

thatís the truth.



    

                   

The dirt root cotton-picking truth.



    

                   

Last time you said

you were afraid not to.



    

                   

Both were true,

you sort of overawe me.



    

                   

You know more than I do...



    

                   

I figured you'd be so doggone

critical all the time.



    

                   

You and that smart alec Mel.



    

                   

You don't really approve of me.

Thatís so, ain't it?



    

                   

You're getting to be all the things

you used to harpoon.



    

                   

See what I mean?



    

                   

The bigger I get,

the smaller you make me feel.



    

                   

You take Betty Lou.



    

                   

Don't try to explain.



    

                   

Betty Lou is your public...



    

                   

all wrapped up in ribbons

in a cute little package.



    

                   

She's the logical culmination

of the great love affair...



    

                   

between Lonesome Rhodes

and his audience.



    

                   

Well, I wish you weren't

so bitter.



    

                   

I'm not bitter.



    

                   

If I sound stridently female about

Miss Majorette, I don't mean to be.



    

                   

I knew you'd married her

just as a way of not marrying me.



    

                   

Look, Marcia, I'm not forgetting

what I owe you.



    

                   

I'll give you a healthy slice

of our operation.



    

                   

  ļ/ļ of my end...



    

                   

You won't have to lift a finger

with what I'm giving you.



    

                   

Giving me? Giving me?

You're not giving me anything!



    

                   

And you're not throwing me off

the train like poor Abe Steiner!



    

                   

"Face in the crowd"

was my idea.



    

                   

The whole idea of Lonesome Rhodes

belongs to me!



    

                   

I always shoulÔve been an equal

partner. Well, now I'm going to be!



    

                   

I'm going to get

something I deserve.



    

                   

That doesn't sound like you.



    

                   

And I want it on paper!



    

                   

OK. All right.



    

                   

I'll tell George to draw up

the papers.



    

                   

Look at yourself

in the mirror, Marcia.



    

                   

You'll see a millionaire.



    

                   

There's always Vanderbilt   .



    

                   

He's going back to Memphis.

He wants to forget us both.



    

                   

I know he'd wait for you

till there was ice on the equator.



    

                   

Thatís how long he did wait.



    

                   

When people ask me, Walter,

"Where do you get all that news?"



    

                   

I invariably tell them I usually

get it from a lot of people...



    

                   

who promised someone

they'd keep it a secret.



    

                   

As, for example...



    

                   

just what is Lonesome Rhodes going

to talk to General Hainsworth about?



    

                   

Oh, General,

oh, Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

And now, Mike Wallace interviews

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Senator, do you mean

you are not infected...



    

                   

- with the presidential itch?

- Itch?



    

                   

Senator, is it not a fact that you

have a date tomorrow night...



    

                   

for what is known as Madison Avenue

coaching from Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

in General Hainsworth's

private projection room?



    

                   

I have said,

it calls for the closest scrutiny.



    

                   

I am unable to persuade myself

and to believe...



    

                   

that the blatant squandering

of American wealth...



    

                   

at home and abroad

is a road to a sound peace.



    

                   

Thank you all...



    

                   

and good evening all.



    

                   

Lights!



    

                   

I know itís not what the people

want to hear...



    

                   

but I know whatís best for them.



    

                   

We think so too, thatís why

everyone in this room...



    

                   

wants you to be the next

President of the United States.



    

                   

But your problem is getting

the voters to listen to you.



    

                   

Getting them to like you

enough to listen to you.



    

                   

Senator, I've got to be blunt.



    

                   

Your TV appearances have been,

well, catastrophes.



    

                   

Wouldn't you say, Lonesome?



    

                   

Beanie, did you check the ratings

for the Senator on "Face the People"?



    

                   

Brutal.



    

                   

Excuse me,  . .



    

                   

Go ahead.



    

                   

We've got to face it, politics have

entered a new stage, television.



    

                   

Instead of long-winded debates,

the people want slogans.



    

                   

"Time for a change" "The mess in

Washington" "More bang for a buck".



    

                   

Punch-lines and glamour.



    

                   

Yes, Mr. Furness, even glamour.



    

                   

My papers have supported

Worthington Fuller...



    

                   

from the first day he ran for office,

he's not a grandstander...



    

                   

a backslapper or a baby-kisser.



    

                   

Thatís exactly what

he's got to become.



    

                   

The majority in this country

don't see eye to eye with him.



    

                   

We've got to find    million buyers

for the product "Worthington Fuller".



    

                   

You underestimate the respect...



    

                   

Respect? Did you ever hear

of anyone buying any product...



    

                   

beer, hair rinse, tissue,

because they respect it?



    

                   

You've got to be loved, man.



    

                   

Loved.



    

                   

I may be old-fashioned but I think

there is still a distinction...



    

                   

between politics and, well,

the field you're in.



    

                   

Bull.



    

                   

I beg your pardon, sir?



    

                   

Sorry if I tread on your corns,

but I said "bull".



    

                   

Politics is people.



    

                   

- Mr. Rhodes...

- Now, now...



    

                   

The General asked me to come here.

If you don't want to hear me...



    

                   

Do go on, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

I'm sorry to make a disturbance,

but...



    

                   

Senator, I'm a professional.



    

                   

I look at the image on that screen

same as at a performer on my show.



    

                   

And I have to say...



    

                   

you'll never get over

to my audience...



    

                   

not to the    million people...



    

                   

who welcome me into their

living rooms each week.



    

                   

And if I wouldn't buy him,

do you realise what that means?



    

                   

If I wouldn't buy him,

the people of this country...



    

                   

aren't ready to buy him for that

big job on Pennsylvania Avenue.



    

                   

Do you know where I found him?



    

                   

I don't think he'll mind my saying,

in jail.



    

                   

He's stupid, he's got no mentality,

he thinks with his feet.



    

                   

But I trust those feet.



    

                   

Now if he don't laugh...



    

                   

if he don't think

the show's any good...



    

                   

then I know there's

something wrong with it...



    

                   

something people just

ain't gonna take to.



    

                   

See what I mean?



    

                   

Now, Beanie...



    

                   

What did you think of the personality

you just saw on screen?



    

                   

Well, I...



    

                   

Come on, give it to us straight.



    

                   

Flatter than last nightís beer.



    

                   

You see your problem now?



    

                   

How are you going to get this man,

this bush-monkey to vote for you?



    

                   

Frankly, I don't know.



    

                   

Well, maybe I do.



    

                   

Do you know how to

lift your ratings...



    

                   

from  .  to   . ?



    

                   

You need... Now hold on

to your hat, my friend...



    

                   

You need a whole

new personality.



    

                   

A new personality?

Frankly, thatís impossible.



    

                   

Now, wait just a moment.



    

                   

For instance, do you have a pet?



    

                   

My wife and I have a Siamese cat.



    

                   

Beanie?



    

                   

My public love dogs.



    

                   

One pitch with a hound

is worth       words.



    

                   

That mutt didn't do Roosevelt

any harm, did it?



    

                   

Dick Nixon either.



    

                   

I'm sure you're right.



    

                   

How about a nickname?



    

                   

Only dishonest thing about Curly

is the way he combs his hair.



    

                   

Curly, thatís rather amusing.



    

                   

See? You've got a sense of humour

about that fine head of skin.



    

                   

No hard feelings now,

we're talking television.



    

                   

Don't press your lips together,

it gives you a kind of sissy look.



    

                   

Keep your mouth relaxed

so you can say...



    

                   

Once in a while.



    

                   

It sounds crazy to you.



    

                   

No, I realise itís a new technique

I've got to face. Thatís why I came.



    

                   

Thatís a boy, Curly.

You just put yourself in my hands.



    

                   

I'll have them loving him.



    

                   

I mean loving him.



    

                   

You know, thatís just what he did

for Vitajex.



    

                   

He ought to be in the cabinet.



    

                   

I'll be going to bed now, sir.



    

                   

Night, Sidney. Lonesome,

I don't know anyone in the country...



    

                   

who coulÔve won the Senator

the way you did. It was...



    

                   

Shut up, I'm thinking.



    

                   

Listen to me,

as your adopted father...



    

                   

you've only one flaw,

the way you've begun...



    

                   

to suddenly shoot out of control.



    

                   

Like this evening,

almost walking out on the Senator.



    

                   

And you're beginning

to antagonise the press, you're...



    

                   

Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes' Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

Whatís that?



    

                   

My new show,

set it up right away.



    

                   

Give me a bunch of

colourful country characters...



    

                   

all sitting around...



    

                   

listening to Lonesome Rhodes

sound off about everything...



    

                   

from the price of popcorn

to the hydrogen bomb.



    

                   

You don't like it?



    

                   

Well, just forget it.



    

                   

All I've got to do is pick up

the phone...



    

                   

I can get Tim Andrews of National

Motors to back it in a minute.



    

                   

I'm not just an entertainer...



    

                   

I'm an influence,

a wielder of opinion...



    

                   

a force.



    

                   

A force.



    

                   

Now, Shelton cigarettes,

and Best Friend Dogfood...



    

                   

bring you the voice

of grass root wisdom.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes

on the Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

You know boys what really

bugs me about our Limey cousins...



    

                   

is the way they keep trying

to act like a first class outfit...



    

                   

when their store is having to close

its branches all over the world.



    

                   

Thatís right, Lonesome.



    

                   

Thatís telling them.



    

                   

He's getting crueler

every minute.



    

                   

Thatís the LorÔs truth.



    

                   

Well, look who's stopping by

to chew the fat with us...



    

                   

around old Cracker Barrel,

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Hey, howdy Curly

how's my old bunk mate?



    

                   

Itís a real pleasure and surprise.

Come and meet the boys.



    

                   

- Hello.

- Hi.



    

                   

Sit down, put your feet up

on that.



    

                   

Hello, Mr. Miller,

long time no see. The usual?



    

                   

And just let the vermouth

blow a kiss at the gin.



    

                   

In just a while I'll be tossing

some questions at old Curly Fuller.



    

                   

I should say

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Are you waiting for someone?



    

                   

I'm just having a quiet drink.



    

                   

I don't remember you

doing that before.



    

                   

I talk to a thousand people a day,

this is a chance to unwind.



    

                   

We didn't know that swallowing

too much raw politics...



    

                   

can put a crease in your head

a whole lot deeper...



    

                   

than that home-made joy juice

we used to concoct back in Arkansas.



    

                   

I wish you'd give me

the real cotton-picking truth...



    

                   

about how you feel on the subject

of more and more...



    

                   

and more social security.



    

                   

I'm glad you asked me that,

Lonesome.



    

                   

I'd say that people today...



    

                   

are obsessed.



    

                   

I mean, real drawn

for security.



    

                   

They want protection, coddling

from the cradle to the grave.



    

                   

I say that weakens

the moral fibre.



    

                   

Boone wasn't looking for unemployment

insurance and old age pension.



    

                   

All he needed was his axe

and his gun...



    

                   

and a chance to hue a living out

of the forest, with his own hands.



    

                   

Real wizzy, ain't it?



    

                   

Thatís the spirit that built

this country.



    

                   

Joe, would you turn

the sound down, please?



    

                   

I'll say one thing, he's got

the courage of his ignorance.



    

                   

How's our old station in Memphis?



    

                   

I didn't go near it,

I've been writing a book...



    

                   

about...



    

                   

I call it

"Demagogue in Denim".



    

                   

Never had such a good time

in my life.



    

                   

You look wonderful.



    

                   

All those months he was calling me

Vanderbilt    and Frontal Lobe.



    

                   

I shoulÔve been

punching him in the nose.



    

                   

Now, I've got a book

to punch him in the nose.



    

                   

Is it going to be published?



    

                   

Came up to sign the contracts.



    

                   

The publishers like it. They think

itís time to pull the mask off him.



    

                   

Let the public see what a fraud

he really is.



    

                   

I wouldn't say that.



    

                   

What would you say?



    

                   

Itís just harder for him

to be as simple as he was...



    

                   

with all those generals and senators

and politicians hanging around.



    

                   

You're still with him?



    

                   

I tone down some

of the crazier notions...



    

                   

he wants to spout on the air.



    

                   

I'm the only person

he can talk to anymore.



    

                   

Lots of people have been fired...



    

                   

There's an awful lot

of money at stake.



    

                   

The agency we started with

the International Drug account...



    

                   

is grossing over

a hundred million a year.



    

                   

How's Mamma Guitar selling?



    

                   

I found him.



    

                   

He's mine for better or worse.



    

                   

I'm doing my small bit

to make him better.



    

                   

Marcia, you're the locker room

where he eases up after the fight...



    

                   

win or lose.



    

                   

You're the shock absorber for

collisions with ex-wives...



    

                   

models, new wives

and assorted tramps.



    

                   

You're the little wheel without which

the express called Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

plunges off the track

and leaps to destruction.



    

                   

I can hardly wait

to read that book.



    

                   

Don't worry, I've spared you

more than you've spared yourself.



    

                   

I know.



    

                   

I know



    

                   

I'll call you again sometime...



    

                   

when I think you're ready.



    

                   

Hey, Betty Lou,

take a look at this poll.



    

                   

I got it up from  ļ/ļ of voters

to   ļ/ļ.



    

                   

  . Thatís a lucky number.

He's going to get in.



    

                   

Hey, Sweet Potato...



    

                   

Iook who's home,

you're big papa man.



    

                   

You're not going to hit me.



    

                   

Don't play the noble defender

of the sanctity of marriage.



    

                   

I know where you were those nights

when Betty was waiting up for you.



    

                   

If you hit me,

itíll be all over the papers.



    

                   

As much as the people love you...



    

                   

You're fired, you're through.



    

                   

I've got news thatíll move you

and shake you.



    

                   

I'm president of

Lonesome Rhodes Enterprises.



    

                   

I own   ļ/ļ of the voting stock.



    

                   

You're in bed with me, Larry,

in bed.



    

                   

Get me Beanie.



    

                   

I think I'll just freshen my soda.



    

                   

Beanie, get Mrs. Rhodes a seat

on the next train to Little Rock.



    

                   

You don't own   ļ/ļ.

You're fired.



    

                   

Fired?



    

                   

Lonesome...



    

                   

Lonesome, nothing happened,

really.



    

                   

This programme is brought to you

by Shelton Cigarettes.



    

                   

I'll treat you like any performer

on my show that flops.



    

                   

I've got a contract with you.



    

                   

You'll get your money every week

as long as you stay in Arkansas.



    

                   

But I don't want to go home.



    

                   

Ed Sullivan wants me to do my batons

act on his show Sunday night.



    

                   

You can do your

baton twirling dance...



    

                   

in the ladies' room

at the Little Rock depot.



    

                   

Marcia, can you hear me?

Get up, wake up!



    

                   

Itís me, big me, the king.



    

                   

Come on, Marcia, open up.



    

                   

I said hurry up on this door,

Marcia.



    

                   

Lonesome's back.



    

                   

Just got rid of Betty Lou.



    

                   

Sweet talking little floozy,

she'd have ruined me.



    

                   

Fix me a drink.



    

                   

What are you doing?



    

                   

We'll have to be more careful

than we used to be.



    

                   

I'll have to stay married

till I get my new appointment.



    

                   

Your what?



    

                   

This is still top secret.



    

                   

The General's been talking

to Fuller.



    

                   

He's selling him the idea

of creating an academy post for me.



    

                   

"In time of imminent crisis

and danger".



    

                   

Thatís the way the General puts it.

Who can rabble people better than me?



    

                   

Hold them in line,

right behind the government.



    

                   

If we put Fuller across the way,

and we will, he's gonna owe me that.



    

                   

Secretary for National Morale.



    

                   

How's that sound to you?

Secretary for National Morale.



    

                   

General's asking him to shake

on it after my banquet tomorrow...



    

                   

launching Fighters for Fuller.



    

                   

Fighters for Fuller?



    

                   

Yeah, how do you like that name?



    

                   

I made it up.

Everybody's nuts about it!



    

                   

The biggest men in the country

are coming to my banquet...



    

                   

to get things rolling.



    

                   

I've got an admiral,

two governors...



    

                   

some investment house boys

and a cabinet minister.



    

                   

Which one?



    

                   

I don't know.



    

                   

I told the general to pick one.



    

                   

They're coming to your party?



    

                   

Honey, if I ask them,

they've got to come.



    

                   

They'd be afraid not to come.



    

                   

I could murder them,

like guests.



    

                   

I'm afraid itís true.



    

                   

Whatís true?



    

                   

Right here, tonight,

you might have that much power.



    

                   

Seen the ratings?



    

                   

  . ...



    

                   

just picked up another million.



    

                   

This old country's just like

my flock of sheep.



    

                   

Sheep.



    

                   

Rednecks, crackers,

hillbillies...



    

                   

houseprouds, shut-ins,

pea-pickers...



    

                   

everybody thatís got to jump

when someone else blows the whistle.



    

                   

They don't know it yet...



    

                   

but they're all gonna be

Fighters for Fuller.



    

                   

They're mine, I own them,

they think like I do.



    

                   

Or they're more stupid than I am,

so I've got to think for them.



    

                   

Marcia, you just wait and see...



    

                   

I'll be the power behind

the president...



    

                   

and you'll be the power behind me.



    

                   

You made me, Marcia,

you made me.



    

                   

I always say that.



    

                   

I owe it all to you.



    

                   

I owe it all to you.



    

                   

All to you.



    

                   

I know it.



    

                   

I know it.



    

                   

Turn the light out.



    

                   

I'm tired.



    

                   

Big day tomorrow...



    

                   

a really big day.



    

                   

A really big day.



    

                   

Come on, come on,

I've got to get some sleep.



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Where are you going?



    

                   

All I can say is tonightís show

is going to be a mess.



    

                   

Now you tell me the show's

in a mess, now.



    

                   

- Marcia never showed up all day.

- I've looked every place...



    

                   

She's the only one

who can co-ordinate.



    

                   

Co-ordinate, hell! Do you mean

to tell me the success of my show...



    

                   

depends on one self-important,

neurotic, temperamental female?



    

                   

I'm fed up with the whole lot

of you incompetents.



    

                   

Nincompoops!

Bootlickers!



    

                   

Would you like some coffee,

Mr. Rhodes?



    

                   

Is that your subtle way of trying

to tell me I'm swacked?



    

                   

Well, I'm not drunk,

just disgusted.



    

                   

I'll handle it.



    

                   

Of course, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

I'll ad lib.



    

                   

Just keep up with me.



    

                   

I've saved the show before.



    

                   

Well, I just wonder what they do

with their afternoons...



    

                   

- One more day like this, and I quit.

- Here she comes.



    

                   

Marcia, where've you been? We've

been trying to find you all day.



    

                   

You know how important it is.



    

                   

We still haven't got

our commercials routine.



    

                   

I know thatís kind of going out

of style, like the corset...



    

                   

but every once in a while,

I ask myself, Lonesome...



    

                   

where's that unmodern,

uncomplicated, unliberated...



    

                   

but oh-so-happy

one-man woman gone?



    

                   

Ain't no use getting het up

about something we can't change.



    

                   

I was duck-shooting

over the weekend...



    

                   

I brought my movie camera along

to show you folks what it was like.



    

                   

Roll the film.



    

                   

Hit it.



    

                   

Hey you, in the projection room,

show us the movie!



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes, they can't hear you.



    

                   

About time.



    

                   

I want to talk to you.



    

                   

I can't tonight, I have to

rush to the banquet...



    

                   

but first thing in the morning.



    

                   

In my office, in the morning.



    

                   

   seconds, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

You can take this,

I've quit today.



    

                   

Even after the senator bagged

his limit, he hated to leave.



    

                   

He says to me, "Lonesome..."



    

                   

Keep the door clear. I'm surrounded

by a lot of dumb sons of nitwits.



    

                   

Hey, you redneck scoundrels

still here?



    

                   

Why aren't you out working

someplace?



    

                   

Ain't that Curly Fuller

a duck-shooting fool?



    

                   

You know when we were

standing shoulder to shoulder...



    

                   

in that cold water,

belly button high...



    

                   

and the sun was smiling on us...



    

                   

Curly looked at me,

and he says, "Lonesome...



    

                   

a family that prays together,

stays together."



    

                   

Thatís what he said.



    

                   

I tell you that man

is an inspiration...



    

                   

a man among men.



    

                   

The Cracker Barrel, starring that

irrepressible Arkansas traveller...



    

                   

You're off.



    

                   

I'm glad thatís over.



    

                   

I'm gonna start shooting people

instead of ducks.



    

                   

For relaxation and for health...



    

                   

the cigarette that cleans

your tobacco without a filter...



    

                   

and by Best Friend Dogfood...



    

                   

your dog's best friend.



    

                   

And by Vitajex, that old "Vitajex

what you doing to me" pill.



    

                   

Hurry back you all, remember

what old Lonesome said...



    

                   

A family that prays together

stays together.



    

                   

All right, super one,

and start the crawl.



    

                   

This has been an FBN production...



    

                   

Fuller, the great hunter.



    

                   

He's shaking like this.



    

                   

If they ever heard the way

that psycho really thinks...



    

                   

Scenic design, James Fitzsimmons.



    

                   

Costumes by Robert Hose.



    

                   

Unit manager, George K George.



    

                   

Sell that stuff about

a man among men...



    

                   

to those morons out there?



    

                   

Shucks, I sell them chicken

fertiliser as caviar.



    

                   

I can make them eat dog food

and think itís steak.



    

                   

Sure, I've got them like this.



    

                   

You know what the public's like,

a cage full of guinea pigs.



    

                   

Good night, you stupid idiots.



    

                   

Good night, you miserable slobs.



    

                   

They're a lot of trained seals...



    

                   

I toss them a dead fish

and they'll flap their flippers.



    

                   

Let them listen, please!



    

                   

Marcia.



    

                   

Why, he's a monster!



    

                   

I'm going to call the station and

give them a piece of my mind.



    

                   

We'll fix you, jerk.



    

                   

I knew he'd open his big yack

once too often and blow my   Gs.



    

                   

I cantí believe itís the same

Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

It is, only this time his personality

finally came through.



    

                   

Give me a drink.



    

                   

Got to hurry boys,

itís a big important day.



    

                   

Come in strong tomorrow,

I'll be loaded for bear.



    

                   

Held the elevator for you,

the Lonesome Rhodes express...



    

                   

going down!



    

                   

All the way down.



    

                   

Yes, sir.



    

                   

Central Broadcasting Network.

That line is busy.



    

                   

Tell him I'll never listen

to his filthy programme again.



    

                   

We're slobs are we?

Well tell Lonesome from me...



    

                   

I said, are we paying you network

a $       an hour...



    

                   

to build up our business,

or destroy it?



    

                   

Just a minute, General.

Get De Palma on the phone.



    

                   

Remember it was your company

brought Lonesome to FBN.



    

                   

Keep this scandal from

rubbing off on Vitajex.



    

                   

Disassociate ourselves.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes?

That line is busy.



    

                   

What did he say?



    

                   

It must have been a whopper.



    

                   

Come up with a good replacement.



    

                   

Thanks for not stopping

to pick up the peasants.



    

                   

How's your ratings?



    

                   

Sorry, Mr. Rhodes has left

and there's no one in the studio.



    

                   

De Palma, you know your contract,

the morals clause.



    

                   

Any act abusing public confidence.



    

                   

I've just the boy to fill the gap.



    

                   

Barry Mills.



    

                   

He's a young Lonesome

and a lot easier to handle.



    

                   

Buddy, I'm just a country boy.



    

                   

Don't spare the horses, I've only   

minutes to get into my dinner suit.



    

                   

"L. R's blooper tops Unk Don's"



    

                   

I could never see what people saw

in him, but he's had it.



    

                   

The sinking of the Titanic,

what happened?



    

                   

Marcia, she went crazy.



    

                   

She's in the booth.



    

                   

I hear you just wrote

the ending to my book.



    

                   

Yeah?



    

                   

Just a minute,

I'll see if she's here.



    

                   

Itís him.



    

                   

Marcia.



    

                   

Oh, Marcia, I need you.

Come over right away.



    

                   

Nobody's come,

everybody cancelled.



    

                   

They didn't even send me

a wire.



    

                   

The General sent me a wire.



    

                   

The Secretary of the Interior sent

me a wire, "Regret to inform you...



    

                   

unavoidably detained,

unable to attend."



    

                   

All of a sudden,

everybody's too busy.



    

                   

All of a sudden, I'm poison.



    

                   

Are you laughing at me?



    

                   

Are you laughing at me?



    

                   

You think I'm washed up, don't you?



    

                   

The same way I lost them,

I'll get them back again.



    

                   

I'm going to make them love me.



    

                   

You're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me.

Say you're gonna love me.



    

                   

You're gonna love me,

you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me.

Say you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me,

you're gonna love me...



    

                   

Whatís your name?



    

                   

Francis, Francis,

you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Francis, you're gonna

love me, love me, love me.



    

                   

Get out! Get out!



    

                   

Get out, you black monkeys!



    

                   

You turn my stomach.

Get out!



    

                   

Sounds like he's finally

gone through the roof.



    

                   

Marcia, how soon can you get here?

I'm surrounded by traitors.



    

                   

That engineer...



    

                   

wait till I get him, I'll fire him.

I'll burn him over a slow fire.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

If you don't come right away,

I'll jump!



    

                   

I'll jump!



    

                   

Jump! Jump!

Get out of my life!



    

                   

Get out of everybody's life.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

I don't believe you.

Now, you'll be a...



    

                   

Oh, Mel...



    

                   

Why didn't you tell him

it was you?



    

                   

Itís true.



    

                   

You'll just make it harder.



    

                   

You should tell him face to face

before he blames    other guys.



    

                   

Face to face,

then maybe I'll believe you.



    

                   

Is it ever as simple as that?



    

                   

You've got to force complicated

things into simple channels.



    

                   

Either you go and tell him

you did it and chop it off clean...



    

                   

so he never comes

crying to you again...



    

                   

or you hold his hand...



    

                   

wipe his poor perspiring brow,

fan his smouldering dampened ego...



    

                   

so he can burst into flames

and burn again.



    

                   

Secretary for National Morale...



    

                   

is a job that I was born for!



    

                   

Somebody send for a doctor,

he's been like that for    minutes.



    

                   

In a time of crisis...



    

                   

who else could rabble the people

like Lonesome Rhodes?



    

                   

Who else could move the people

to action like Lonesome Rhodes?



    

                   

You are looking...



    

                   

at America's answer...



    

                   

to the crying need for national...



    

                   

- What are you doing that for?

- He likes lots of applause.



    

                   

Maybe I'm just a country boy...



    

                   

but if the President

tries to stop me...



    

                   

I'll flood the White House

with millions of telegrams!



    

                   

I made him

and I can break him!



    

                   

Yeah!



    

                   

Yeah, you know I can.



    

                   

Because the people listen

to Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Because the people

love Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes is the people.



    

                   

The people is Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Beanie!

More, yeah, yeah!



    

                   

No! No!



    

                   

Ten thousand miles away

from home...



    

                   

and I don't even know my name.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

Oh, Marcia.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

I knew you'd come.

I knew you'd come.



    

                   

Marcia, I lost them...



    

                   

but all I've got to do

is talk to them one more time.



    

                   

I'll say I said that just to see

how many were really listening.



    

                   

Sure, I'll have them eating out of

my hands again, just like old times.



    

                   

Larry, it was me.



    

                   

I'm back on top again.



    

                   

First thing I'll do

when I'm back on top...



    

                   

I'll get that sound man...



    

                   

I'll get that dirty, stinking

little mechanical genius...



    

                   

It was me.



    

                   

It was.



    

                   

It was me.



    

                   

I held you open...



    

                   

on purpose.



    

                   

I'm telling you,

so you'll never call me again.



    

                   

Never again.



    

                   

OK.



    

                   

My little Marshmallow.



    

                   

Good luck with Mel.



    

                   

Run along.



    

                   

I'm sorry, forgive me.



    

                   

Go on.



    

                   

Go.



    

                   

Listen, I'm not through yet.



    

                   

You know whatís going

to happen to me?



    

                   

Suppose I tell you exactly

whatís going to happen to you?



    

                   

You'll be back on television...



    

                   

only it won't be quite the same

as it was before.



    

                   

After a cooling-off period,

someone will say...



    

                   

"Why don't we try him again

in an inexpensive format?



    

                   

People's memories aren't too long."



    

                   

And in a way, he'd be right.



    

                   

Some people will forget,

some won't.



    

                   

You'll have a show.



    

                   

Maybe not the best hour, or top ten.

Maybe not even in the top   .



    

                   

You'll have a show, it just won't

be quite the same as it was before.



    

                   

Then a couple of new fellas

will come along...



    

                   

and soon a lot of your fans

will be flocking around them.



    

                   

Then, one day, someone will ask

"Whatever happened to...



    

                   

whatís his name? You know,

the one who was so big...



    

                   

the number one fella

a couple of years ago.



    

                   

He was famous, how can we

forget a name like that?



    

                   

By the way,

have you seen Barry Mills?



    

                   

He's the greatest thing

since Will Rogers."



    

                   

Beanie!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

I don't figure him for a suicide.



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Mel, if I'd only left him

in that jail in Pickett.



    

                   

Marcia, stop it.



    

                   

You were taken in

just like we all were.



    

                   

We got wise to him,

thatís our strength.



    

                   

Come back Marcia!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Come back!







 

                   

Somebody's looking for you.



 

                   

Miss Jeffries!



 

                   

Morning, Sheriff.



 

                   

We've got what you want, we always

get a good haul on the 4th of July.



 

                   

Good. Come on, letís go.



 

                   

Here she comes, Bill.



 

                   

Come in, and see what we've got.



 

                   

Wait, I forgot my tape recorder.



 

                   

Boys, this is Miss Marcia Jeffries.



  

                   

How do you do?



  

                   

Her uncle owns the radio station

in town, KGRK.



  

                   

She's been doing a programme,

maybe you've heard it...



  

                   

"A face in the crowd". A mighty nice

programme it is, too.



  

                   

I know this is a little unusual...



  

                   

but this morning she's going

to do her programme from here.



  

                   

Miss Jeffries, the jail of Tawny

Hawk County is at your disposal.



  

                   

Itís very simple, you just talk into

this microphone in a natural voice.



  

                   

We'll just chat back and forth.



  

                   

This is completely informal...



  

                   

so if anybody wants to sing a song

or tell an anecdote...



  

                   

a funny story...



  

                   

Let me see. Beanie,

last time you were here...



  

                   

I heard you sing something.



  

                   

I ain't got my teeth with me

this time.



  

                   

This is Radio KGRK, the voice

of North East Arkansas...



  

                   

bringing you its morning feature,

"A face in the crowd".



  

                   

Whose face?

It could be yours.



  

                   

Or yours. People are fascinating

wherever you find them.



  

                   

This is Marcia Jeffries,

looking for more faces...



  

                   

this time from the county jail.

Say something.



  

                   

Don't worry Ma,

everything's fine.



  

                   

Nicest jail I've been in

in this part of the country.



  

                   

Hey you, you can do something.



  

                   

I got black skin,

but I ain't no minstrel.



  

                   

I'm sorry, Miss Jeffries,

they're just an ordinary bunch.



  

                   

Where's the drunk from last night

with the guitar? Whatís his name?



  

                   

- Rhodes. Thatís him lying there...

- Go and wake him up.



  

                   

- Watch him, he's mean.

- Miss Jeffries, we'll wake him up.



  

                   

Hey, wake up!



  

                   

Morning, Mr. Rhodes,

I'm from Radio...



  

                   

Get away! Get away!



  

                   

The sheriff's here.



  

                   

I don't care if the President

is here.



  

                   

If a man can't get a little

decent sleep in jail...



  

                   

Who are you?



  

                   

I'd like to introduce you

to our radio audience.



  

                   

Radio?



  

                   

Join me in a little chat...



  

                   

Wait a minute!



  

                   

quit racing your motor.



  

                   

What do I get out of it?



  

                   

I mean, Me Myself and I.



  

                   

Sheriff?



  

                   

- Whatís he in here for?

- A week, drunk and disorderly.



  

                   

If you'll co-operate, I might

let you out in the morning.



  

                   

Me too, I'm his manager.



  

                   

The boys say you don't keep

your word any too good.



  

                   

You keep your end of the bargain,

I'll keep mine.



  

                   

Well, OK.



  

                   

Itís a deal, tomorrow morning.



  

                   

I'll sing you a song.



  

                   

I went to Sarah Lawrence College,

I majored in music.



  

                   

I learned that real American

music comes from the bottom up.



  

                   

When Gershwin played at the New York

it was black tie music...



  

                   

but the real beginning of it

was in folks that never owned a tie.



  

                   

I just bumped into a fella you

never heard of, Rhodes.



  

                   

Whatís your first name?



  

                   

Jack, or Mack,

whatís the difference?



  

                   

Calls himself "Lonesome Rhodes".



  

                   

Lonesome?



  

                   

Don't be rushing me,

cut that thing off a minute.



  

                   

Give me a chance to lubricate

my Adam's apple.



  

                   

Nothing like a little medicine

to put you in the mood.



  

                   

Ain't mamma a beauty?



  

                   

A guitar beats a woman

any time!



  

                   

I never have seen a woman

I could trust like this old guitar.



  

                   

I love my mamma guitar.



  

                   

She's always waiting for me

to pick her up and hold her.



  

                   

Never asks me for money or goes

cheating around when I ain't looking.



  

                   

If she gets a little sour, I just

give her a little twist like so...



  

                   

and we're right back

in tune together.



  

                   

Hey, Lonesome,

sing "Rye whisky".



  

                   

Lonesome.



  

                   

"Hallelujah, I'm a bum."



  

                   

She can see that plain enough.



  

                   

Whenever a bunch of fellas

like us...



  

                   

outcasts, hobos, nobodies,

gentlemen loafers...



  

                   

one time or all time losers,

call us what you want to...



  

                   

Whenever we get together,

we tell funny stories...



  

                   

me and Beanie

and the rest of these...



  

                   

hand-to-mouth tumbleweed boys

like you see in here.



  

                   

If whisky don't get us,

then women must...



  

                   

and it looks like...



  

                   

I'm never gonna cease...



  

                   

my wandering.



  

                   

But, deep down,

when we get ready...



  

                   

to tuck our heads under our wings

and go to sleep...



  

                   

we ain't kidding ourselves.



  

                   

We're so low-down Ionely...



   

                   

the fella we couldn't stand

the sight of this morning...



   

                   

tonight, when the guards

douse the lights...



   

                   

and plunge us into darkness...



   

                   

why that same fella seems like

our nearest, dearest buddy.



   

                   

Ten thousand miles

away from home.



   

                   

And I don't even know my name.



   

                   

But I ain't crying.



   

                   

No, I ain't crying, because I'm

gonna be a free man in the morning.



   

                   

You hear that, fellas?

A free man!



   

                   

The sheriff's gonna open up

his cage...



   

                   

and I'm gonna be as free

as a bird in the morning.



   

                   

Hey, maybe I can try putting

a couple of rhymes together...



   

                   

Sing something dependable

like "Home on the Range".



   

                   

I ain't gonna sing no

"Home on the Range".



   

                   

No, sir, not if it means

I rot in here another month.



   

                   

I'm gonna sing

what I'm gonna be...



   

                   

a free man in the morning.



   

                   

Oh, good night, moon.



   

                   

Moon, you just fade,

fade, fade away.



   

                   

Oh, good night, moon.



   

                   

Moon, you just fade away.



   

                   

And hurry on, Mr. Sun...



   

                   

bring on the new day.



   

                   

Oh, bring on the sheriff...



   

                   

with his great big old key.



   

                   

Yeah!



   

                   

Bring on old Big Jeff,

the sheriff of Pickett, Arkansas...



   

                   

with his big old fat key.



   

                   

To open up this nasty,

filthy jailhouse...



   

                   

and make a free man of me.



   

                   

You got any objections to

being a free man in the morning?



   

                   

No, sir, I ain't.



   

                   

Gonna be a free man

in the morning...



   

                   

free man in the morning...



   

                   

free man in the morning...



   

                   

I know the reason...



   

                   

All right, I'm ready.



   

                   

Thank you, Lonesome Rhodes,

that was just fine.



   

                   

You mean to tell me you

had that going all the time?



   

                   

I'm a sneaky type.



   

                   

Well, lock me up...



   

                   

- You like him?

- Yes, sir.



   

                   

By golly, I think you've got yourself

quite a fella there, quite a fella.



   

                   

I'd sure like to use him on

our Early Bird Show from   to  .



   

                   

Would you let me, Uncle J. B?



   

                   

Hello, get me the jail, Gladys.



   

                   

- The jail?

- Thatís right, the sheriff.



   

                   

Or should I say, our future mayor.



   

                   

That boy may be bashful, Marcia,

but he's pretty sweet on you.



   

                   

The only thing I'm interested in...



   

                   

is running the best radio programme

in North East Arkansas.



   

                   

Hello, Big Jeff?



   

                   

- Rhodes?

- Yes.



   

                   

Thatís the thing, J. B...



   

                   

I was only holding him

on a drunk and disorderly.



   

                   

You've no idea which way

he was headed?



   

                   

There's only two ways out of town,

and I can hardly see him going west.



   

                   

He'll be on the east road.



   

                   

Letís go after him.



   

                   

There he is.



   

                   

Hey! Morning!



   

                   

We've been looking for you.



   

                   

Yeah? What for?



   

                   

This is my uncle, Mr. Jeffries,

who owns our radio station.



   

                   

Well, how's it feel to be

a free man in the morning?



   

                   

Where you headed now?



   

                   

Port St Joe, Florida.



   

                   

Thatís a long walk.

Whatís down there?



   

                   

Oh, plenty of water and

plenty of fishing bridges...



   

                   

and snapper boats,

and tarpon rolls...



   

                   

You know, I've always wanted

to catch me a tarpon.



   

                   

Whatís to stop you?



   

                   

I can't afford it.



   

                   

I've got a radio station,

newspaper, printing business...



   

                   

I'm president of the Caguanas...



   

                   

I can't afford it.



   

                   

Come on, Beanie.



   

                   

Listen, I ain't got but   or   days

to make it to St. Joe.



   

                   

Unless I steal somebody's car.



   

                   

Wait a minute, we've got a job

for you.



   

                   

Every morning on our station,

  to  .



   

                   

I don't want no job.



   

                   

Why not?



   

                   

Too much like work, man.



   

                   

Do you have any money?



   

                   

Mamma will always get me a meal.

I can sleep in a jail.



   

                   

Come on, try it for a day.



   

                   

How about if you had a plane ticket?

You can put it in your pocket...



   

                   

if you ever want to go,

you just go.



   

                   

Well...



   

                   

OK. I'll try it for one day.



   

                   

I'll turn around.



   

                   

Letís go.



   

                   

Take him to the hotel

and get him a room.



   

                   

And you better clean him up

a bit.



   

                   

See you around, Beanie.



   

                   

Get in the back.



   

                   

Would you mind closing the door?



   

                   

My goodness, ain't we fussy!



   

                   

This wardrobe you got, I think

I better send it to the laundry.



   

                   

I'll wash it myself. That way I can

cut out any time I feel like it.



   

                   

So early in the morning?



   

                   

How would you like to come

and get aquainted...



   

                   

early in the morning?



   

                   

We really do have to hurry.



   

                   

I bet you never sat on bed

with a man before.



   

                   

Really!

Look, I'll meet you downstairs.



   

                   

Ladies,

or I guess I should say, girls...



   

                   

the boss lady just shoved

a piece of paper at me...



   

                   

says I ain't got

but   more minutes.



   

                   

Thatís what I've got

against working...



   

                   

itís tangled up

with the word "hurry".



   

                   

Back in my town,

we had a cousin named Harry...



   

                   

they all called him Hurry 'cause

he was always running someplace.



   

                   

Till one day he fell down a flight

of steps and broke his fool neck.



   

                   

We put a sign on his grave

that said...



   

                   

"He was in such a hurry,

he couldn't wait to get here."



   

                   

Shucks, I was just going to add on

a verse about being a free woman.



   

                   

I bet a lot of you dream of that...



   

                   

with all the breakfast dishes

piling up in the sink...



   

                   

and cranky husbands

to get off to work.



   

                   

Ain't it a shame how they

get on about everything...



   

                   

because they ain't got the gumption

to take it out on their boss?



   

                   

Well, good-bye, dear,

I'm late for work.



   

                   

I hate to talk against

my own kind but I never saw...



   

                   

a man who could appreciate

how hard you women have to work.



   

                   

They think running water over a dish

is all there is to it.



   

                   

They never see you clean the grease

out of the sink...



   

                   

or wiping out of the oven

the gravy...



   

                   

or the apple juice that sizzles over

the side of the dish onto your grill.



   

                   

How would he know that?



   

                   

Listen to this.



   

                   

"Dear Lonesome, though I never

set eyes on you..."



   

                   

Listen. "I know you must be

saintly looking.



   

                   

Only a saint could understand the

burdens of a housewife like you do."



   

                   

They all say the same. They love

his voice, his guitar, his ideas.



   

                   

They should know

some of them.



   

                   

You're not fooling me,

you're proud of him.



   

                   

There hasn't been mail like this

since you started the station.



   

                   

Hello.



   

                   

Hello, Wayne.



   

                   

Oh, so you like the fella?



   

                   

OK, I guess we can put you down

for three one-minute spots.



   

                   

Thanks for calling, bye.



   

                   

Well, advertisers are

actually calling to buy time.



   

                   

This station will make

a little money yet.



   

                   

Go easy on the advertising.

I don't think he wants to stay.



   

                   

Marcia, you found him,

itís your job to get him...



   

                   

Honey, whenever you see

this well running dry...



   

                   

you just come over here again.



   

                   

Thatís right, Lonesome.



   

                   

I'm afraid thatís going

to be your name.



   

                   

My real intimate friends

call me Larry.



   

                   

You can call me Larry.



   

                   

Thatís a good chaser.



   

                   

Did you always drink like that?



   

                   

Not always, back in Riddle

I was pretty straight.



   

                   

I didn't touch hard liquor

till I was    or   .



   

                   

Is there really a town

called Riddle?



   

                   

To tell you the truth itís just

sort of a what do you call it...



   

                   

Composite?



   

                   

Compost heap is more like it.



   

                   

Where are you from?



   

                   

From all over.



   

                   

Any town you mention for     miles,

I lived in a day or two.



   

                   

What did your father do?



   

                   

He was a spieler

with a two-bit con.



   

                   

"Now, if each of you hand me

your $  bills...



   

                   

I'm gonna favour you

with a five dollar gift."



   

                   

Still loved him, didn't you?



   

                   

He left us when I was

knee high to a beer barrel.



   

                   

You mother took care of you?



   

                   

Never mind about her.



   

                   

What about those uncles

you talk about?



   

                   

Uncles?



   

                   

If I'd a nickel for every time I

fell asleep waiting for my old lady.



   

                   

When I'd wake up she'd say,

"Your uncle's sleeping".



   

                   

I'd say "Uncle Lou?"



   

                   

She'd say "No, this is

your Uncle Mike, Uncle Moe".



   

                   

There wasn't a town in Arkansas or

Missouri I didn't have an uncle in.



   

                   

Yes, ma'am. My old lady sure was

generous about taking in relatives.



   

                   

Yet you grew up

so happy-go-lucky.



   

                   

You put your whole self

in that laugh.



   

                   

Marcia, I put my whole self

into everything I do.



   

                   

You turned down my invite

to go out with this tramp?



   

                   

No! Stop it! Stop it!



   

                   

Thanks for the pies, girls.



   

                   

You're going to spoil me.



   

                   

Well, I reckon I've sung at you

enough for one morning.



   

                   

Maybe I'll wind up with a joke.



   

                   

Letís see...



   

                   

Yeah, I got one.



   

                   

Sheriff Big Jeff Bess.



   

                   

You say that ain't no joke?



   

                   

The fact he's running for mayor

strikes me as kind of funny.



   

                   

You know, back in my little town,

Riddle...



   

                   

the way we elect fellas

to office is...



   

                   

we try to figure which fella can

best be spared from useful labour.



   

                   

Like, you take

the village half-wit...



   

                   

Now, in most places, he's going

to be put on town relief...



   

                   

but in Riddle, as an economy measure,

we make him the dog catcher.



   

                   

But, now,

this sheriff of yours...



   

                   

I don't say

nothing against him...



   

                   

but if you've any mutts

you want rid of...



   

                   

why don't you take them to his place

to see if he can handle the job.



   

                   

Here, Whitey!

Here, Whitey!



   

                   

How does it feel?



   

                   

How does what feel?



   

                   

Saying whatever comes in your head

and being able to sway people.



   

                   

Yeah, I guess I can.



   

                   

Yeah, I guess I can.



   

                   

And now, an amusing example of

grass roots democracy in action.



   

                   

It seems there's a small town

radio personality...



   

                   

called "Lonesome Rhodes"

out in Arkansas...



   

                   

who literally sent a mayoralty

candidate to the dogs.



   

                   

Larry, Larry.



   

                   

Just plough out through and keep

going, leave the rest to me.



   

                   

Thanks for bringing up

my breakfast.



   

                   

This is Mr. Steiner,

all the way from Memphis.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes. I'm one of the oldest

theatrical agents in the mid south.



   

                   

I book a lot of acts for

the Grand Old Opera.



   

                   

I discovered Hank Snow,

and Webb Pierce...



   

                   

and the first morning I heard you,

I said to myself...



   

                   

"Steiner, that man's got power."



   

                   

Not just catchy songs

and funny stories, power.



   

                   

How would you like

to come to Memphis, sir?



   

                   

Memphis?



   

                   

You put me in mind of Will Rogers

when he first came to Memphis.



   

                   

I can make you a star, boy,

if you put yourself in my hands.



   

                   

Shucks, I'm just a country boy.



   

                   

I'm not even sure I want to stay

in this radio business.



   

                   

I'm not one of these

hard pressure fellas.



   

                   

But, do you mind

if I call you again?



   

                   

No.



   

                   

Miss Jeffries.



   

                   

Grand Old Opera,

thatís the big time.



   

                   

It never hurt none to play

hard to get.



   

                   

You ought to know that.



   

                   

You don't seem to be pining

for lack of company.



   

                   

I get extra hungry

in the morning.



   

                   

You cold fish respectable girls.



   

                   

Inside you crave the same things

as the rest of them.



   

                   

Tell the truth.



   

                   

You're on in   minutes.



   

                   

Itís so hot this morning,

the creek gave up.



   

                   

I mean it was bone dry.



   

                   

So the young ones figure

they ain't got no place to swim.



   

                   

But my boss...



   

                   

old J.B. Jeffries,

he's got a fine swimming pool...



   

                   

right here in town.



   

                   

So why don't you kids

go to his place for a ducking?



   

                   

J. B will be proud

to have you.



   

                   

Can you hear them?

Can you hear them, splashing?



   

                   

Thatís your curly-headed

little darlings, enjoying...



   

                   

J.B. Jeffries' kind of hospitality.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes, telephone.



   

                   

He's on the air.



   

                   

Itís the Memphis TV Station,

he says Steiner told him about you.



   

                   

Well, shucks, I can talk

to him on the air.



   

                   

All these folks are my friends,

I ain't got nothing to hide.



   

                   

Hello there, partner.



   

                   

Whatís that?



   

                   

You want me to come on TV in

Memphis? With this kisser of mine?



   

                   

All I can say is

you're a brave man.



   

                   

$    a week?



   

                   

Confederate?



   

                   

$   ?



   

                   

We can do better than that.



   

                   

Partner, leaving Pickett is like

leaving my own flesh and blood.



   

                   

Now, if I've got to take leave

of these good folks...



   

                   

I'd rather try it for nothing

for a couple of weeks...



   

                   

and if you ain't satisfied,

or if I get homesick for Arkansas...



   

                   

back I come and

nobody gets hurt.



   

                   

But, if we find we get along...



   

                   

you make it

a $     a week.



   

                   

Yeah, you get the idea.



   

                   

And transportation for yours truly

and my little Girl Friday...



   

                   

not to mention Monday, Tuesday,

Wednesday, Thursday, Marcia Jeffries.



   

                   

I'm glad you're going with him,

take care of him.



   

                   

I'll sure try.



   

                   

Take good care of yourself.



   

                   

Marcia!



   

                   

Come on, honey.

We'll be late, come on.



   

                   

The train will leave,

come on.



   

                   

Bye!



   

                   

Bye Lucy, so long, Luther,

you write to me now.



   

                   

I'll be thinking of you.



   

                   

Am I glad to shake that dump!



   

                   

I was only kidding, honey...



   

                   

you should know me better

than to believe everything I say.



   

                   

Bye! Bye!



   

                   

Good-bye and God bless

you good people!



   

                   

If I'd known you'd put lipstick

on me, I'd have never come.



   

                   

Stop complaining,

you look beautiful.



   

                   

This is Mel Miller, the station's

assigned him as your writer.



   

                   

Writer?



   

                   

You're gonna have an easy job.

I don't do much reading.



   

                   

I just work out the continuity.



   

                   

What are you, eastern college?



   

                   

No, I went to school

in Nashville.



   

                   

I was Vanderbilt   .



   

                   

OK, Vanderbilt   .



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes, we're ready for you.



   

                   

Hey, what are you doing

to that make-up?



   

                   

   seconds, ready on one,

stand by two...



   

                   

Just be natural, easy

and relax, real country.



   

                   

When that red light is on,

that camera is on you.



   

                   

Now, put this in your mouth.



   

                   

I think that straw's gonna be

a nice touch.



   

                   

Here he is, a newcomer

to Memphis Television...



   

                   

but sure to become an old friend.



   

                   

"A face in the crowd",

starring that Arkansas traveller...



   

                   

Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

What do you want?



   

                   

Howdy.



   

                   

I've never seen myself

on one of these things before.



   

                   

So if I start admiring myself

on this...



   

                   

What do you call it?



   

                   

Monitor.



   

                   

Monitor. Show folks

what I'm talking about, will you?



   

                   

The director said

all I had to do was...



   

                   

He said I had to act like

I was looking straight at you...



   

                   

but he forgot to say there'd be

a redeye looking straight at me.



   

                   

You know, it does look

kind of familiar though...



   

                   

It reminds me of my Uncle Ivan

after a night of drinking...



   

                   

that fine old five star

corn liquor.



   

                   

He put a star on the bottle

for every day it aged.



   

                   

If the ocean was moonshine

and I was a duck...



   

                   

I'd dive...



   

                   

I'm too tired

to sing this morning.



   

                   

Whatís the matter with you

big city fellas anyhow?



   

                   

Don't you ever go to bed

around here?



   

                   

Last night, I settled down

for my    hour nap in the hotel...



   

                   

and moly hoses, what a honking...



   

                   

and lights a-flashing and

girls a-giggling on the street!



   

                   

So I called the desk on the telephone

they've got in every room.



   

                   

"Whatís going on?" I said...



   

                   

"It ain't New Year's Eve,

by any chance?"



   

                   

"No," he said...



   

                   

"Itís just ten o'clock at night

in Memphis".



   

                   

So I pulled back on my duds and went

out to see what the commotion was.



   

                   

Hey, Mr. Cameraman,

move that redeye a little closer.



   

                   

He's already telling us what to do.



   

                   

I want to talk face to face

with my friends out there.



   

                   

Which one of these holes

do I look in?



   

                   

One thing I could see right off

about a big city...



   

                   

there's a whole lot of people

in trouble out there.



   

                   

You don't see it much in the daytime

when everyone's hustling around...



   

                   

rushing from where they is

to where they ain't...



   

                   

but itís at night,

late at night...



   

                   

around   o'clock in the morning

itís what I call "the dividing line".



   

                   

All you've got left

is folks in trouble.



   

                   

I'm gonna tell you people something

happened to me this morning.



   

                   

I'm going to tell you, and see if

it don't happen to you the same way.



   

                   

If it don't move your hearts...



   

                   

you're just a bunch of

big city pickle hearts.



   

                   

I'll pack up my one shirt and

the Bible my daddy gave me...



   

                   

and my cigar box guitar...



   

                   

and I'll just get me

on home to Riddle.



   

                   

Itís true about the one shirt,

but I've yet to see the Bible.



   

                   

The way he talks about the night,

I couldn't write it that well.



   

                   

Come out here.



   

                   

Don't be scared of this,

at least no more than I am.



   

                   

A coloured woman.

In Memphis, that takes nerve.



   

                   

I told you, he's his own man.



   

                   

You just tell folks

the same thing you told me.



   

                   

You see, itís my house...



   

                   

It burnt down.

She's got seven young ones...



   

                   

Helen, look what they're having

on television, now.



   

                   

Itís about time.



   

                   

She just walked around, because

she didn't have no place else to go.



   

                   

I didn't know a single

living soul in Memphis.



   

                   

Are you kidding?



   

                   

I bet you've got      

friends out there.



   

                   

Each one will prove it

by sending bucks...



   

                   

so you can build a decent house

for those brats of yours.



   

                   

Now, please, noboby send in

more than $ .  ...



   

                   

you might not be able to spare it.



   

                   

If you've got over $  

cut in for that house of hers.



   

                   

They're gonna be looking out for you,

ain't you, folks?



   

                   

Lonesome! You should see how

the money is pouring in!



   

                   

Get out of bed,

you've got a client!



   

                   

Whatís that?



   

                   

Itís a mattress company,

that means you get your $    .



   

                   

Stand still, you slob.



   

                   

Here, get your hand in here.



   

                   

Here it comes.



   

                   

That sure is prettier music than

a cigar box guitar.



   

                   

There's eighteen thousand

five hundred...



   

                   

and forty-one...



   

                   

of these things so far,

and we ain't hardly started.



   

                   

Mrs. Tooley says thank you...



   

                   

you good people.



   

                   

You folks are building a house.



   

                   

Ain't nothing you can't do when you

let the best side of you take over.



   

                   

Oh, I see the old clock-watcher

going this way.



   

                   

He wants me to make sure

I leave time for the commercial.



   

                   

You didn't know I had a sponsor,

did you?



   

                   

Neither did I till I woke up

this morning.



   

                   

He's a good looking scoundrel,

ain't he?



   

                   

What?



   

                   

Yeah, I've got the commercial

on me somewhere. Letís see...



   

                   

Johnny Longshotís tip

for the Daily Double...



   

                   

No. No, that ain't it.



   

                   

"Lonesome...



   

                   

darling, you ain't forgetting

your little Arkansas Annie...?



   

                   

No, that surely ain't it.



   

                   

This is it.



   

                   

Friends "comma" why not invest

in sleep insurance "question mark".



   

                   

That is what you will be doing

when you buy your...



   

                   

Luffler Easy-Rest

mattress "period".



   

                   

It comes in six tasty flavours...



   

                   

Well, thatís about enough

commercials.



   

                   

Personally, when I'm dog-tired,

I sleep on the floor.



   

                   

One of the best nightís sleep

I ever had was in a box car.



   

                   

They say that a firm mattress

is better for your spine...



   

                   

but if you follow that, ain't it

better just to sleep on the floor?



   

                   

But, if you softies insist

on sleeping on a bed...



   

                   

I reckon you can do worse

than a Luffler Easy-Rest.



   

                   

End of commercial.



   

                   

Maybe also the end

of Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Seriously, I was on the phone

with Mr. Luffler for half an hour.



   

                   

I'm sure he's seen us

and hasn't even looked around.



   

                   

He's got a loophole

in his contract...



   

                   

and if you kill his commercial once

more, he'll walk right through it.



   

                   

Hi there, Lonesome.

Hey!



   

                   

Boy, I almost forgot.



   

                   

I got those tickets for the plug

you gave this morning.



   

                   

I guess you didn't know

I do a little shlockmeistering.



   

                   

Shlockmeistering!



   

                   

You just slip in a remark about these

products and they pay you in kind.



   

                   

A case of beer, free drinks

at the Elrose Cafe, all that jazz...



   

                   

I tell you, it mounts up.



   

                   

Isn't that illegal? Stealing time

from regular sponsors?



   

                   

Illegal?



   

                   

Honey, nothing's illegal

if they don't catch you.



   

                   

See you, Joe.



   

                   

OK, see you around.



   

                   

Who was that?



   

                   

Joe, Luffler's office boy.



   

                   

He won't be an office boy long.



   

                   

Mr. Luffler doesn't like what

I said about his mattress.



   

                   

Shucks, I said you could get a good

nightís sleep on one of them...



   

                   

if you're real tired.



   

                   

There I go again.



   

                   

I just can't get my mouth around

the things they want me to say.



   

                   

But, I'll try.



   

                   

And now, a message of importance.



   

                   

Now, you good people ain't so dumb

you don't know whatís important.



   

                   

The atom bomb's important,

things like that.



   

                   

A Luffler mattress

won't break your back...



   

                   

but it sure ain't no

world-shaking message.



   

                   

Just in case you won't be seeing me

again... Fellas, come on.



   

                   

Here's a little song

to remember me by.



   

                   

Give me an "E"...



   

                   

Well, good-bye, Mr. Luffler,

and thanks for the ride...



   

                   

I'd like to have your money,

but I'd rather have my pride.



   

                   

On this corny old commercial

we just cannot agree...



   

                   

so you can tear up my contract...



   

                   

make a free man of me!



   

                   

Going to be...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

a free man in the morning...



   

                   

I know the reason why.



   

                   

Yes, Mr. Luffler.



   

                   

Get me my lawyer.



   

                   

Yes.



   

                   

Who is it?



   

                   

Itís me, Lonesome.

Larry.



   

                   

I've come to say good-bye.



   

                   

Just a minute.



   

                   

I just wanted to say

I'm gonna hit the road.



   

                   

Where to?



   

                   

Whatís the difference?

For Mr. Luffler.



   

                   

He's firing me unless I promise to

show him my scripts in advance.



   

                   

There ain't no script,

I'm just me.



   

                   

Stay. Even after what you

did for Mrs Tooley?



   

                   

I'm not my brother's keeper.



   

                   

You are and you don't know it.



   

                   

I don't cow tow to

no mattress company.



   

                   

See you in jail, sometime.



   

                   

We shook them up a little bit.

Had a run for our money.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

Come here.



   

                   

Did I call you a cold fish,

Marcia?



   

                   

Marcia...



   

                   

itís short for marshmallow.



   

                   

My little marshmallow.



   

                   

This way, please.



   

                   

Joey, the boss wants you.



   

                   

Thatís terrible.



   

                   

Mr. Luffler, since you hired

Lonesome Rhodes...



   

                   

up to an including yesterday,

our sales have increased   ļ/ļ.



   

                   

I smell smoke.



   

                   

I know he's hurt your feelings, but

as a merchandise man I must say...



   

                   

that a   ļ/ļ jump in sales

is quite a painkiller.



   

                   

- I'll think it over.

- You called for me?



   

                   

Yes.

I can always get him back!



   

                   

For the credit department.



   

                   

Yes, sir.



   

                   

Joey...



   

                   

You're a smart lad.



   

                   

Do you think I acted hasty

in firing him?



   

                   

I wouldn't let anyone

ridicule my product.



   

                   

Your wife on one.



   

                   

Yes, dear?



   

                   

Would you mind

your own business dear?



   

                   

Would you tell the Ladies' Garden

Club to mind its own business?



   

                   

Credit department. Get me Browning,

Schlegel and McNally in New York.



   

                   

Don't worry, itís kosher, Luffler

gave me a message for them.



   

                   

Do you know the number?



   

                   

Itís the biggest ad agency

in New York.



   

                   

Browning, Schlegel and McNally,

try information.



   

                   

Browning, Schlegel and McNally,

long distance from Memphis?



   

                   

Just a moment.



   

                   

A Mr. Joseph De Palma, from Memphis,

he represents Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Itís a crazy business we're in.



   

                   

This is about some joker called

Lonesome Rhodes on a local Memphis...



   

                   

Hey, he topped both CBS and NBC

down there.



   

                   

Hello. Mr. De Palma?



   

                   

Hello, I just thought

I'd let you know...



   

                   

that Lonesome Rhodes

is being flooded with offers.



   

                   

If you happen to be interested,

  o'clock is our deadline.



   

                   

All right.

I'll call you back at five.



   

                   

Five. Well, my pleasure.



   

                   

I caught that show on my vacation,

he's a living doll.



   

                   

Could be.



   

                   

EBDNO, in New York City.



   

                   

Marcia.



   

                   

Marcia?



   

                   

You told me to pick you up

in time for the show.



   

                   

Hey, have you seen Lonesome?



   

                   

You'll find him in there.



   

                   

In here?



   

                   

Oh, you mean in here?



   

                   

I wouldn't barge in there

if I were you.



   

                   

I'm not you.

Hey, hey, Lonesome!



   

                   

Lonesome, boy, hey!



   

                   

Yeah, yeah, who is it?



   

                   

Itís destiny, thatís who it is.



   

                   

Joe Destiny. Hi.



   

                   

Child, I sold your show.



   

                   

To the big time.



   

                   

You wouldn't know it,

THE advertising company.



   

                   

I got them bidding against

the Cutler Agency, MCA...



   

                   

Who?



   

                   

and a dozen others you won't know.

Look...



   

                   

BSNM wants you for primetime.

  o'clock, coast to coast.



   

                   

I told them we'd let them know

at   .   hours.



   

                   

Boy, I tell you,

we're on to New York.



   

                   

We are?



   

                   

They asked me if you had a New York

agent. Would you like to meet him?



   

                   

A bum out of jail in Pickett,

Arkansas...



   

                   

and a Memphis office boy!



   

                   

Go, baby!



   

                   

Yes, sir! Go, daddy-o!



   

                   

Hey, will you sign this?



   

                   

Thank you.



   

                   

Now, in the last quarter, gentlemen,

and Miss Valerie...



   

                   

we have spent over $      

of General Hainsworth's money...



   

                   

to make this country

Vitajex conscious.



   

                   

And all we've succeeded in doing...

Next chart, please...



   

                   

is dropping from   ļ/ļ of the market

to  ļ/ļ. Now I...



   

                   

Mr. Macey, I'm late for the dog food

meeting. Can I say my say and go?



   

                   

Yes.



   

                   

I've gone over this product

pretty carefully in the lab.



   

                   

Vitajex has a few grains

of aspirin...



   

                   

a little sugar, that might

give you some energy...



   

                   

but, frankly,

General or no General...



   

                   

we've nothing to sell.



   

                   

Strike that from the transcript,

Miss Murray.



   

                   

You know General Hainsworth always

reads the product group reports.



   

                   

I can't help it, I was hired

as a research chemist.



   

                   

Dr. Wiley, there's nothing wrong

with Vitajex, is there?



   

                   

It won't kill you,

if thatís what you mean.



   

                   

Itís relatively harmless,

like a patent medicine...



   

                   

Thank you, doctor. Now, letís

get this train back on the tracks.



   

                   

With all due respect to our

estimable television department...



   

                   

He hates our guts.



   

                   

and itís sudden enthusiasm...



   

                   

for Lonesome Rhodes...



   

                   

I think we need a dignified sell.



   

                   

I'd like a    minute participation

on the Ed Murrow show.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes is here, sir.



   

                   

Don't you think...

I mean, itís irregular.



   

                   

I just thought if you and the boys

got a look at him...



   

                   

you'd see why the TV shop

is sold on him.



   

                   

Gentlemen, Lonesome Rhodes.



   

                   

Hi, folks.



   

                   

Howdy.



   

                   

I'm here to sell these kidney pills

or whatever the heck they are.



   

                   

Hey, whatís the matter?

You got no spittoons around here?



   

                   

Denise, would you bring

the gentleman a spittoon?



   

                   

Now, whatís your particular

problem, Mr. Fuzzy Lip?



   

                   

Sit down, Mr. Rhodes.

You may as well know...



   

                   

Vitajex is the sick sister in

the International Drug family.



   

                   

They're getting ready

to put out a smaller pill...



   

                   

Jim, before we make

any hasty decisions...



   

                   

Look at these poor little

white pills you're trying to peddle.



   

                   

They're kind of pale,

got no charge to them.



   

                   

I got an idea.

Letís make them yellow.



   

                   

The colour of sunshine

and energy.



   

                   

Gives a fella the get up and go

that sets him up with the ladies.



   

                   

I guess...



   

                   

if you want to be bright-eyed

and bushy-tailed...



   

                   

just gobble up a handful of Vitajex

and your battery's charged. Watch.



   

                   

I am ready!



   

                   

I mean, I am in the mood!



   

                   

My personality undergoes

a startling change.



   

                   

I got your spittoon...



   

                   

I'm going to get you,

you little redhead!



   

                   

Thatís what Vitajex does to me and

I haven't even swallowed them yet.



   

                   

You college geniuses want

dignity on your programme.



   

                   

Where I come from,

a fella looks too dignified...



   

                   

he's looking to steal your watch!

I'll move your merchandise!



   

                   

Peace.



   

                   

Peace.



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

You fill me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

Oh, Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Oh...



   

                   

Vitajex...



   

                   

Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Vitajex,

what are you doing to me?



   

                   

You fill me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Keep your eye on that rating.



   

                   

Do it again.

Vitajex puts a gleam in your eye.



   

                   

Fills you full of...



   

                   

And each pill contains    units...



   

                   

of energy-giving endrocaine.



   

                   

Vitajex, jex, jex

makes you go, go, go!



   

                   

Keep your eye on that rating.



   

                   

Thatís why Vitajex

gives you that get up and go.



   

                   

Do you have trouble with your girl?

Does she look elsewhere?



   

                   

Here's how Vitajex

solved his problem.



   

                   

Vitajex!



   

                   

It fills me full of ecstasy!



   

                   

See what I mean?



   

                   

This is General Hainsworth.



   

                   

I've just seen Lonesome

on the television, and I like him.



   

                   

Why don't you take Vitajex...



   

                   

like Lonesome Rhodes does?



   

                   

She's talking about the new

large economy size.



   

                   

I bought my boyfriend

a ten year supply.



   

                   

Now, the soft sell.



   

                   

- Keep your eye on the ratings.

- Vitajex, Vitajex, Vitajex.



   

                   

Vitajex, what are you doing to me?



   

                   

Now, the hard sell.



   

                   

Vitajex,   . .



   

                   

General, I'm willing

to put myself on record.



   

                   

I say he's a risk, uncooperative

and unpredictable.



   

                   

We've spent tens of thousands

to find out the key words...



   

                   

like "racing" and "zestful".



   

                   

Rhodes has the audacity to tear us

to shreds in front of the audience.



   

                   

  . .



   

                   

General, where are you?



   

                   

If you'll forgive us,

we have to get back to town.



   

                   

Why, hello, girls!



   

                   

How's Princeton   

and the old lady?



   

                   

Afraid I'm making these

fellas unhappy.



   

                   

I'm not in the business

to make them happy...



   

                   

but of putting the public in

the frame of mind to buy Vitajex.



   

                   

Exactly.



   

                   

Excuse us, dear. Poor Mace,

he's already had one heart attack...



   

                   

and you're winding him up

to another.



   

                   

Well, thatís his hard luck.



   

                   

Hello, Senator!

Did you have a fine flight?



   

                   

Splendid! Splendid. I'll join you

when I get freshened up a bit.



   

                   

My guest, Senator Fuller, I'd like

to see him in the White House.



   

                   

Don't they call him

the last of the Isolationists?



   

                   

Maybe, in some of those

left-wing papers.



   

                   

Rhodes, I want you to get to know

people like that.



   

                   

I'd like to take you under my wing

and educate you.



   

                   

Shucks, general,

I'm just a country boy.



   

                   

Young man, never forget

Will Rogers.



   

                   

He was just a gum chewing

rope twirling cowboy...



   

                   

but he got to where he was

telling off presidents and kings.



   

                   

General, my thinking is the second

section of the same train.



   

                   

I've always gone in for

long range planning.



   

                   

Right now, Lonesome

is merely popular, very popular...



   

                   

but Lonesome Rhodes could be

made into an influence.



   

                   

A wielder of opinion,

an institution...



   

                   

positively sacred to his country,

like the Washington monument.



   

                   

I suspect your idealistic young lady

disagrees with me...



   

                   

but my study of history

has convinced me...



   

                   

that in every strong society

from the Egyptians on...



   

                   

the mass had to be guided

with a strong hand...



   

                   

by a responsible elite.



   

                   

Let us not forget that in TV

we have the greatest instrument...



   

                   

for mass persuasion

in the history of the world.



   

                   

I don't mean

to flatter you, sir...



   

                   

What? Oh, yes. Well, letís

have a go at it, shall we?



   

                   

Roger, Roger!



   

                   

Are you jotting this down?



   

                   

First, I'll see if I can sell Henry

on the idea of a "Life" cover.



   

                   

Remind me to call him for lunch.



   

                   

I proudly dedicate to you...



   

                   

the latest hybrid iris

of our horticultural laboratory.



   

                   

The "Unusfloratorum"...



   

                   

We girls call it

"The Lonesome Rhodes".



   

                   

I christen thee

the "USS Rhodes".



   

                   

And so, on behalf of our

great commonwealth...



   

                   

I'm proud to dedicate

one of nature's wonders...



   

                   

henceforth and forever

to be known as...



   

                   

"Mount Rhodes".



   

                   

And now, Lonesome,

back in those difficult days...



   

                   

you had a pal.



   

                   

We flew him to New York tonight...



   

                   

to help recall the struggle

and joys of times gone by.



   

                   

Because, Lonesome Rhodes,

you lived it!



   

                   

Hey, Lonesome!



   

                   

Beanie!



   

                   

You old scoundrel,

where have you been?



   

                   

Here, go out and get yourself

some good liquor.



   

                   

Thank you, New York,

thank you, thank you!



   

                   

Hey, listen to this...



   

                   

The boys in our ward

at the Veterans' hospital...



   

                   

just got together

and donated $ .  .



   

                   

You ask me how I can keep going

   hours without sleep?



   

                   

Man, this is better than sleep!



   

                   

Didn't I tell you, kid?

Didn't I tell you?



   

                   

Do you still want me

to hold this sign?



   

                   

As general manager of

the Sherry Towers...



   

                   

itís my honour to present you

with a gold key...



   

                   

to the two top floors of

New York's finest hotel.



   

                   

To the very top!



   

                   

You can't get much higher.



   

                   

Hello.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

What time is it?



   

                   

Marcia, you've got to come over.



   

                   

I never shoulÔve let Joe sell me the

idea of a penthouse over the offices.



   

                   

   rooms to be alone in.



   

                   

I feel like a shipwrecked fella

on an island.



   

                   

Larry, I know that island,

itís populated with friendly girls.



   

                   

Marcia, honey, believe me,

itís a matter of life and death.



   

                   

Call me soon, doll.



   

                   

Larry?



   

                   

If you don't come

I'll dive off the balcony...



   

                   

and I'm ten blocks from the lake.



   

                   

Marcia, come out here.



   

                   

I had a girl up here tonight.



   

                   

I get restless.



   

                   

I lied to you. When itís over

I'm Ionelier than I was before.



   

                   

Come out here a minute.



   

                   

Look at all those TV aerials

sticking up like branches.



   

                   

There's a whole forest of them

from here to San Diego.



   

                   

All waiting to hear

what I have to say.



   

                   

Is that why you woke me

in the middle of the night?



   

                   

What I'm trying to say is all them

millions of people believing it...



   

                   

doing what I tell them to...



   

                   

scares me.



   

                   

The General and all them big-shots

trying to educate me.



   

                   

Educate, or use you?



   

                   

Thatís it, the General says

the country needs me.



   

                   

I'm supposed to be an influence.



   

                   

Itís mighty tall grass, Marcia.



   

                   

We're getting in deep, Marcia.



   

                   

Deeper than we ever dreamed

when we started out in Arkansas.



   

                   

I know I act like I just ate the

western hemisphere for breakfast.



   

                   

But, down here in the boiler room,

I know I need advice.



   

                   

And not the kind I get from Joey,

or the Madison Avenue lot...



   

                   

who'll betray me

as soon as my back is turned.



   

                   

No, I know when I come

to the top of a mountain...



   

                   

I need you.



   

                   

Because you're level with me.



   

                   

You're my lifeline to truth.



   

                   

Well...



   

                   

marry me, Marcia.



   

                   

Please?



   

                   

Thatís what I called you

over here for.



   

                   

Can't keep anything alive up here.



   

                   

Dust in this city kills everything.



   

                   

Larry.



   

                   

Don't play with me.



   

                   

Don't hurt me.



   

                   

Don't hurt me.



   

                   

Marcia, there's a lady to see you.



   

                   

A lady?



   

                   

She's got a dress on.



   

                   

I don't want to see anybody.



   

                   

OK, I'll tell her to move it out.



   

                   

I'm sorry ma'am...



   

                   

Are you the...



   

                   

I am Mrs. Rhodes.



   

                   

Are you related to Mr. Rhodes?



   

                   

But, you're not his mother?



   

                   

His wife.



   

                   

All right, Beanie.



   

                   

Isn't he something?



   

                   

Do you turn this down a little?



   

                   

So...



   

                   

You're Lonesome's new tootsie?



   

                   

Lonesome, thatís a hot one.



   

                   

I hope you had better luck

keeping him Ionesome than I did.



   

                   

You should understand that I'm just

a business associate of Mr. Rhodes.



   

                   

Ain't you something!



   

                   

The floor manager of your programme

is my brother in law's first cousin.



   

                   

He told me where I could find you.



   

                   

So you come off it, little lady.



   

                   

Do you mind...?



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes might have done me

the courtesy of telling me himself.



   

                   

Mr. Rhodes don't do no courtesies

to nobody.



   

                   

I could write a book about him.



   

                   

Is the purpose of your visit

to collect material?



   

                   

Oh, I came to collect,

but it ain't material.



   

                   

Unless you get Larry to pay me

three grand a month...



   

                   

not only will I not divorce him...



   

                   

but I'll make it plenty hot

for the both of you.



   

                   

I already got some feelings

from confidential magazines.



   

                   

I'm not engaged to your husband.



   

                   

Larry thinks he has to take a bite

out of every broad he comes across.



   

                   

Then he calls them a tramp,

drops them...



   

                   

all sort of psycho-something

or other, you know?



   

                   

I caught him red-handed

with my best girlfriend.



   

                   

He broke my jaw.



   

                   

Seems to be working quite

effectively now.



   

                   

Mrs. Rhodes, if you'll excuse me,

I'm very busy this morning.



   

                   

Well, tell Larry,   G a month,

and he's yours.



   

                   

An old fashioned marriage...



   

                   

is my favourite marriage.



   

                   

Itís a sincere type song.

Should be a big hit.



   

                   

An old fashioned kiss

needs a silvery...



   

                   

Oh, shut up!



   

                   

The Backward Barons are

rehearsing our new theme song.



   

                   

Very catchy.



   

                   

Lonesome wrote it.



   

                   

Actually, two fellas wrote it.

Of course, their names aren't on it.



   

                   

General,

we wanted to show you this.



   

                   

Lonesome designed it himself,

the reaction machine.



   

                   

You just push these little levers,

it can laugh.



   

                   

Giggle.



   

                   

"Ah".



   

                   

- Ain't that good?

- Most ingenious.



   

                   

We're thinking of putting them

on the market.



   

                   

A Lonesome Rhodes

automatic reactor.



   

                   

Mechanical laughter and applause,

what are we coming to?



   

                   

We're coming to a bigger model.



   

                   

I'm sorry to end this,

itís most interesting...



   

                   

but I've got a date at my club,

lunch with Senator Fuller.



   

                   

Whatís the matter?



   

                   

General, I wish you had time

to see our whole operation.



   

                   

You're wound tighter than a clock,

whatís up?



   

                   

Next time you propose, you might

consider getting unmarried first.



   

                   

Listen, Beanie told me,

it ain't as bad as you think.



   

                   

I got a divorce, a couple

of years ago in Mexico.



   

                   

But the judge got indicted for fraud

so my ex claimed...



   

                   

The latest ratings, Mr. Rhodes.



   

                   

Hallelujah!



   

                   

Rhodes,   . .

Opposition,   . .



   

                   

That other fella's gonna be

jumping out of windows.



   

                   

So, like I say, the ex claimed

the divorce was a fraud too...



   

                   

I've got a good lawyer

working it out in Juarez.



   

                   

If I go down there, he'll

get it off my back in    hours.



   

                   

Don't play with me,

I'm not one of your girls.



   

                   

On a stack of Bibles, Marcia.



   

                   

Saturday I'm going to be in Pickett

judging the drum majorette contest.



   

                   

I'll go straight

from there to Mexico.



   

                   

Next time you hear from me,

itíll be from Juarez, believe me.



   

                   

That is just dreadful...



   

                   

"We also take in laundry."

Thatís a new one.



   

                   

Welcome to the black hole

of Calcutta.



   

                   

This is one place they

didn't show the General.



   

                   

Naturally, here are the lepers

of the great TV industry...



   

                   

men without faces.



   

                   

They even slide our cheques under

the door to pretend we're not here.



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Think of the satisfaction

of being a small cog...



   

                   

in the great wheel of humanity

"Lonesome Rhodes".



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Sounds like she's coming over

to our side.



   

                   

Ha, ha, ha!



   

                   

Why don't you quit?



   

                   

Why don't you quit?



   

                   

I'm deeply involved with him.



   

                   

Spoken like a lady.



   

                   

Got his introduction ready?



   

                   

Home town boy, not only making

good, but making everybody.



   

                   

For a mild man,

you sound vicious.



   

                   

Didn't you know?

All mild men are vicious.



   

                   

They hate themselves for being mild

and the extroverts whose violence...



   

                   

has a strange attraction for

nice girls who should know better.



   

                   

Today, "A face in the crowd"

takes you on a sentimental journey...



   

                   

as Lonesome Rhodes, your old

Arkansas traveller goes home...



   

                   

to the typical dirt road

cotton-picking town of Pickett.



   

                   

Where America's favourite country

cousin got his humble start...



   

                   

he now returns to the simple folk

who loved him first.



   

                   

The latest face in the crowd,

the lucky, talented girl...



   

                   

whom he will select from

hundreds of contestants...



   

                   

as Miss Arkansas Drum Majorette

of     .



   

                   

And here's the man

you've been waiting for...



   

                   

Look at them.

Look at them!



   

                   

Ain't that the most?



   

                   

I mean the most!



   

                   

Fantastic.



   

                   

Country people.



    

                   

The heart of America,

the salt of the earth.



    

                   

Hey, Beanie, L.R.!



    

                   

"We love L.R.".



    

                   

Lonesome!



    

                   

Hi, you all!



    

                   

Itís dangerous.



    

                   

What, baton twirling?



    

                   

No, power.



    

                   

You've got to be a saint to stand

the power that box gives you.



    

                   

Oh, itís wonderful!



    

                   

She's only seventeen.



    

                   

She looks like a very sweet child.



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

my heart is too full...



    

                   

to say anything more...



    

                   

than welcome back

to Pickett.



    

                   

A great artist...



    

                   

a great humanitarian...



    

                   

a great American.



    

                   

Our very own

Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Friends...



    

                   

fellow Arkansasians,

fellow Americans...



    

                   

I know I should start off

with a funny story...



    

                   

about my kin folk in Riddle...



    

                   

but I just feel too humble

this afternoon...



    

                   

as I look out on this fine

representative body...



    

                   

of wholesome young

American womanhood.



    

                   

You know I've been a fan

of baton swirling from way back.



    

                   

I think itís a honest to God

American art form.



    

                   

Here's a number I just recorded

for the Golden Oak Label.



    

                   

You kids might enjoy

twirling to it.



    

                   

Here she goes,

"Mamma guitar"!



    

                   

Oh, yeah.

Our first contestant will be...



    

                   

Miss Suzanne McKinley

of Beagelstown...



    

                   

letís have a real doozie, Suzie!



    

                   

And now, Miss Linda Bruce

from Ganderstown.



    

                   

Go, girl, go!



    

                   

From the town of Snakebite...



    

                   

Miss Peggy May Hardy.



    

                   

Letís see you twirl it

and swirl it Peggy May!



    

                   

I give you

Miss Mary Jane Johnson...



    

                   

from the neighbouring village

of Pocahontas.



    

                   

And now,

Miss Betty Lou Fleckum.



    

                   

And I say, that the winner...



    

                   

by unanimous decision

and thatís me...



    

                   

is little Miss Betty Lou Fleckum!

Miss Arkansas Drum Majorette...



    

                   

of     !



    

                   

I'm so excited...



    

                   

I'm sorry.



    

                   

You're my idol, honest.



    

                   

I pasted your picture

on the ceiling over my bed...



    

                   

so you're the first thing I see

when I wake up in the morning.



    

                   

Well, bless your heart.



    

                   

- What will you have?

- Water, I have a family.



    

                   

- Hello.

- Mace, good show.



    

                   

Yes, I think it went well.



    

                   

Hi, Beryl.



    

                   

Mace, that baton bit

was the living end.



    

                   

Thanks.



    

                   

As Lonesome said,

itís an American art form.



    

                   

A glass of water, Joe.



    

                   

Oh, peach of a show, Miss Jeffries.



    

                   

Should boost the ratings.



    

                   

Poor Macey.



    

                   

Lives on a diet of hydroglycerine

and ratings.



    

                   

Call it a Bible, but itís really

a death warrant with decimal points.



    

                   

- Here you are, sir.

- Thanks.



    

                   

Miss J, this just came for you.



    

                   

Being in this place

is just like being in the office.



    

                   

Not quite. Joe, two more, please

and this time would you just...



    

                   

let the vermouth blow a kiss

at the gin?



    

                   

Our barefoot boy won't be flying in

tonight. He's hopping over to Juarez.



    

                   

"Get Arthur Godfrey to fill in,

I'll do the same for him someday.



    

                   

Counting on you to hold the fort."



    

                   

This shoulder's getting a permanent

callus from holding that fort.



    

                   

Whatís in Juarez?



    

                   

Bars...



    

                   

lawyers, quick marriages...



    

                   

quick divorces.



    

                   

Then, this is it?



    

                   

You're blushing.



    

                   

Sixty to one martinis.



    

                   

I suppose I should be a gentleman

and wish you all the happiness.



    

                   

I think I'll just be a cad and hope

he chokes on a Vitajex pill.



    

                   

You look nice.



    

                   

Larry!



    

                   

Make sure you get the bride.



    

                   

This is great stuff.



    

                   

Officer, I'm his fiancťe.



    

                   

- Did you say married?

- Sure did.



    

                   

This lady had done me the honour

of becoming Mrs. Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

We did it in Juarez.



    

                   

Easy, fellas, I just got her.



    

                   

Where are you going?



    

                   

Miss, I'm Earl Wilson,

what are your measurements?



    

                   

Hey, what are you trying to do?

Are you out of your mind?



    

                   

Get it up there.

Thatís it.



    

                   

Their names are Kiko and Pico.



    

                   

Kiko and Pico!



    

                   

Well, here she is.



    

                   

My little Arkansas sweet potato,

Betty Lou.



    

                   

I ain't been so happy since the day

I fell into Grandpa's corn liquor...



    

                   

and just guzzled my way

down to dry land.



    

                   

I don't reckon I'll be a free man

tomorrow morning.



    

                   

But if this ain't freedom...



    

                   

man, itís the next best thing.



    

                   

And now...



    

                   

you want to see

what first caught my eye?



    

                   

And what second caught my eye?



    

                   

And what keeps on...



    

                   

and on catching my eyes?



    

                   

Ladies and gentlemen...



    

                   

I give you

Mrs. Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Doing her unbelievable...



    

                   

double five baton

twirling dance...



    

                   

to the scherzo

from the  th Symphony...



    

                   

by Ludwig van Beethoven.



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes...



    

                   

could I talk to you

for just a minute, please?



    

                   

I told you I didn't want you agents

nagging me.



    

                   

I've been with Browning, Schlegal

and McNally for    years...



    

                   

in charge of the

International Drug account.



    

                   

The General just told me

he's taking his business away.



    

                   

Your young Mr. De Palma

has wormed his way in...



    

                   

Look, Macey, Joe De Palma's

doing a heck of a job for me.



    

                   

But, you know this business,

itís cut-throat...



    

                   

Look, Macey...



    

                   

If a rating nose-dives

or if you lose a client...



    

                   

even if it isn't your fault,

the executive has to go.



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes, if I lose this account,

I'll be fired.



    

                   

I've got a son in Princeton...



    

                   

Rhodes, you've seen my...

You've seen my office...



    

                   

A corner office

with four windows.



    

                   

Do you know how long it

takes to get a corner...?



    

                   

I was afraid to marry you,

thatís the truth.



    

                   

The dirt root cotton-picking truth.



    

                   

Last time you said

you were afraid not to.



    

                   

Both were true,

you sort of overawe me.



    

                   

You know more than I do...



    

                   

I figured you'd be so doggone

critical all the time.



    

                   

You and that smart alec Mel.



    

                   

You don't really approve of me.

Thatís so, ain't it?



    

                   

You're getting to be all the things

you used to harpoon.



    

                   

See what I mean?



    

                   

The bigger I get,

the smaller you make me feel.



    

                   

You take Betty Lou.



    

                   

Don't try to explain.



    

                   

Betty Lou is your public...



    

                   

all wrapped up in ribbons

in a cute little package.



    

                   

She's the logical culmination

of the great love affair...



    

                   

between Lonesome Rhodes

and his audience.



    

                   

Well, I wish you weren't

so bitter.



    

                   

I'm not bitter.



    

                   

If I sound stridently female about

Miss Majorette, I don't mean to be.



    

                   

I knew you'd married her

just as a way of not marrying me.



    

                   

Look, Marcia, I'm not forgetting

what I owe you.



    

                   

I'll give you a healthy slice

of our operation.



    

                   

  ļ/ļ of my end...



    

                   

You won't have to lift a finger

with what I'm giving you.



    

                   

Giving me? Giving me?

You're not giving me anything!



    

                   

And you're not throwing me off

the train like poor Abe Steiner!



    

                   

"Face in the crowd"

was my idea.



    

                   

The whole idea of Lonesome Rhodes

belongs to me!



    

                   

I always shoulÔve been an equal

partner. Well, now I'm going to be!



    

                   

I'm going to get

something I deserve.



    

                   

That doesn't sound like you.



    

                   

And I want it on paper!



    

                   

OK. All right.



    

                   

I'll tell George to draw up

the papers.



    

                   

Look at yourself

in the mirror, Marcia.



    

                   

You'll see a millionaire.



    

                   

There's always Vanderbilt   .



    

                   

He's going back to Memphis.

He wants to forget us both.



    

                   

I know he'd wait for you

till there was ice on the equator.



    

                   

Thatís how long he did wait.



    

                   

When people ask me, Walter,

"Where do you get all that news?"



    

                   

I invariably tell them I usually

get it from a lot of people...



    

                   

who promised someone

they'd keep it a secret.



    

                   

As, for example...



    

                   

just what is Lonesome Rhodes going

to talk to General Hainsworth about?



    

                   

Oh, General,

oh, Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

And now, Mike Wallace interviews

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Senator, do you mean

you are not infected...



    

                   

- with the presidential itch?

- Itch?



    

                   

Senator, is it not a fact that you

have a date tomorrow night...



    

                   

for what is known as Madison Avenue

coaching from Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

in General Hainsworth's

private projection room?



    

                   

I have said,

it calls for the closest scrutiny.



    

                   

I am unable to persuade myself

and to believe...



    

                   

that the blatant squandering

of American wealth...



    

                   

at home and abroad

is a road to a sound peace.



    

                   

Thank you all...



    

                   

and good evening all.



    

                   

Lights!



    

                   

I know itís not what the people

want to hear...



    

                   

but I know whatís best for them.



    

                   

We think so too, thatís why

everyone in this room...



    

                   

wants you to be the next

President of the United States.



    

                   

But your problem is getting

the voters to listen to you.



    

                   

Getting them to like you

enough to listen to you.



    

                   

Senator, I've got to be blunt.



    

                   

Your TV appearances have been,

well, catastrophes.



    

                   

Wouldn't you say, Lonesome?



    

                   

Beanie, did you check the ratings

for the Senator on "Face the People"?



    

                   

Brutal.



    

                   

Excuse me,  . .



    

                   

Go ahead.



    

                   

We've got to face it, politics have

entered a new stage, television.



    

                   

Instead of long-winded debates,

the people want slogans.



    

                   

"Time for a change" "The mess in

Washington" "More bang for a buck".



    

                   

Punch-lines and glamour.



    

                   

Yes, Mr. Furness, even glamour.



    

                   

My papers have supported

Worthington Fuller...



    

                   

from the first day he ran for office,

he's not a grandstander...



    

                   

a backslapper or a baby-kisser.



    

                   

Thatís exactly what

he's got to become.



    

                   

The majority in this country

don't see eye to eye with him.



    

                   

We've got to find    million buyers

for the product "Worthington Fuller".



    

                   

You underestimate the respect...



    

                   

Respect? Did you ever hear

of anyone buying any product...



    

                   

beer, hair rinse, tissue,

because they respect it?



    

                   

You've got to be loved, man.



    

                   

Loved.



    

                   

I may be old-fashioned but I think

there is still a distinction...



    

                   

between politics and, well,

the field you're in.



    

                   

Bull.



    

                   

I beg your pardon, sir?



    

                   

Sorry if I tread on your corns,

but I said "bull".



    

                   

Politics is people.



    

                   

- Mr. Rhodes...

- Now, now...



    

                   

The General asked me to come here.

If you don't want to hear me...



    

                   

Do go on, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

I'm sorry to make a disturbance,

but...



    

                   

Senator, I'm a professional.



    

                   

I look at the image on that screen

same as at a performer on my show.



    

                   

And I have to say...



    

                   

you'll never get over

to my audience...



    

                   

not to the    million people...



    

                   

who welcome me into their

living rooms each week.



    

                   

And if I wouldn't buy him,

do you realise what that means?



    

                   

If I wouldn't buy him,

the people of this country...



    

                   

aren't ready to buy him for that

big job on Pennsylvania Avenue.



    

                   

Do you know where I found him?



    

                   

I don't think he'll mind my saying,

in jail.



    

                   

He's stupid, he's got no mentality,

he thinks with his feet.



    

                   

But I trust those feet.



    

                   

Now if he don't laugh...



    

                   

if he don't think

the show's any good...



    

                   

then I know there's

something wrong with it...



    

                   

something people just

ain't gonna take to.



    

                   

See what I mean?



    

                   

Now, Beanie...



    

                   

What did you think of the personality

you just saw on screen?



    

                   

Well, I...



    

                   

Come on, give it to us straight.



    

                   

Flatter than last nightís beer.



    

                   

You see your problem now?



    

                   

How are you going to get this man,

this bush-monkey to vote for you?



    

                   

Frankly, I don't know.



    

                   

Well, maybe I do.



    

                   

Do you know how to

lift your ratings...



    

                   

from  .  to   . ?



    

                   

You need... Now hold on

to your hat, my friend...



    

                   

You need a whole

new personality.



    

                   

A new personality?

Frankly, thatís impossible.



    

                   

Now, wait just a moment.



    

                   

For instance, do you have a pet?



    

                   

My wife and I have a Siamese cat.



    

                   

Beanie?



    

                   

My public love dogs.



    

                   

One pitch with a hound

is worth       words.



    

                   

That mutt didn't do Roosevelt

any harm, did it?



    

                   

Dick Nixon either.



    

                   

I'm sure you're right.



    

                   

How about a nickname?



    

                   

Only dishonest thing about Curly

is the way he combs his hair.



    

                   

Curly, thatís rather amusing.



    

                   

See? You've got a sense of humour

about that fine head of skin.



    

                   

No hard feelings now,

we're talking television.



    

                   

Don't press your lips together,

it gives you a kind of sissy look.



    

                   

Keep your mouth relaxed

so you can say...



    

                   

Once in a while.



    

                   

It sounds crazy to you.



    

                   

No, I realise itís a new technique

I've got to face. Thatís why I came.



    

                   

Thatís a boy, Curly.

You just put yourself in my hands.



    

                   

I'll have them loving him.



    

                   

I mean loving him.



    

                   

You know, thatís just what he did

for Vitajex.



    

                   

He ought to be in the cabinet.



    

                   

I'll be going to bed now, sir.



    

                   

Night, Sidney. Lonesome,

I don't know anyone in the country...



    

                   

who coulÔve won the Senator

the way you did. It was...



    

                   

Shut up, I'm thinking.



    

                   

Listen to me,

as your adopted father...



    

                   

you've only one flaw,

the way you've begun...



    

                   

to suddenly shoot out of control.



    

                   

Like this evening,

almost walking out on the Senator.



    

                   

And you're beginning

to antagonise the press, you're...



    

                   

Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes' Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

Whatís that?



    

                   

My new show,

set it up right away.



    

                   

Give me a bunch of

colourful country characters...



    

                   

all sitting around...



    

                   

listening to Lonesome Rhodes

sound off about everything...



    

                   

from the price of popcorn

to the hydrogen bomb.



    

                   

You don't like it?



    

                   

Well, just forget it.



    

                   

All I've got to do is pick up

the phone...



    

                   

I can get Tim Andrews of National

Motors to back it in a minute.



    

                   

I'm not just an entertainer...



    

                   

I'm an influence,

a wielder of opinion...



    

                   

a force.



    

                   

A force.



    

                   

Now, Shelton cigarettes,

and Best Friend Dogfood...



    

                   

bring you the voice

of grass root wisdom.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes

on the Cracker Barrel.



    

                   

You know boys what really

bugs me about our Limey cousins...



    

                   

is the way they keep trying

to act like a first class outfit...



    

                   

when their store is having to close

its branches all over the world.



    

                   

Thatís right, Lonesome.



    

                   

Thatís telling them.



    

                   

He's getting crueler

every minute.



    

                   

Thatís the LorÔs truth.



    

                   

Well, look who's stopping by

to chew the fat with us...



    

                   

around old Cracker Barrel,

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Hey, howdy Curly

how's my old bunk mate?



    

                   

Itís a real pleasure and surprise.

Come and meet the boys.



    

                   

- Hello.

- Hi.



    

                   

Sit down, put your feet up

on that.



    

                   

Hello, Mr. Miller,

long time no see. The usual?



    

                   

And just let the vermouth

blow a kiss at the gin.



    

                   

In just a while I'll be tossing

some questions at old Curly Fuller.



    

                   

I should say

Senator Worthington Fuller.



    

                   

Are you waiting for someone?



    

                   

I'm just having a quiet drink.



    

                   

I don't remember you

doing that before.



    

                   

I talk to a thousand people a day,

this is a chance to unwind.



    

                   

We didn't know that swallowing

too much raw politics...



    

                   

can put a crease in your head

a whole lot deeper...



    

                   

than that home-made joy juice

we used to concoct back in Arkansas.



    

                   

I wish you'd give me

the real cotton-picking truth...



    

                   

about how you feel on the subject

of more and more...



    

                   

and more social security.



    

                   

I'm glad you asked me that,

Lonesome.



    

                   

I'd say that people today...



    

                   

are obsessed.



    

                   

I mean, real drawn

for security.



    

                   

They want protection, coddling

from the cradle to the grave.



    

                   

I say that weakens

the moral fibre.



    

                   

Boone wasn't looking for unemployment

insurance and old age pension.



    

                   

All he needed was his axe

and his gun...



    

                   

and a chance to hue a living out

of the forest, with his own hands.



    

                   

Real wizzy, ain't it?



    

                   

Thatís the spirit that built

this country.



    

                   

Joe, would you turn

the sound down, please?



    

                   

I'll say one thing, he's got

the courage of his ignorance.



    

                   

How's our old station in Memphis?



    

                   

I didn't go near it,

I've been writing a book...



    

                   

about...



    

                   

I call it

"Demagogue in Denim".



    

                   

Never had such a good time

in my life.



    

                   

You look wonderful.



    

                   

All those months he was calling me

Vanderbilt    and Frontal Lobe.



    

                   

I shoulÔve been

punching him in the nose.



    

                   

Now, I've got a book

to punch him in the nose.



    

                   

Is it going to be published?



    

                   

Came up to sign the contracts.



    

                   

The publishers like it. They think

itís time to pull the mask off him.



    

                   

Let the public see what a fraud

he really is.



    

                   

I wouldn't say that.



    

                   

What would you say?



    

                   

Itís just harder for him

to be as simple as he was...



    

                   

with all those generals and senators

and politicians hanging around.



    

                   

You're still with him?



    

                   

I tone down some

of the crazier notions...



    

                   

he wants to spout on the air.



    

                   

I'm the only person

he can talk to anymore.



    

                   

Lots of people have been fired...



    

                   

There's an awful lot

of money at stake.



    

                   

The agency we started with

the International Drug account...



    

                   

is grossing over

a hundred million a year.



    

                   

How's Mamma Guitar selling?



    

                   

I found him.



    

                   

He's mine for better or worse.



    

                   

I'm doing my small bit

to make him better.



    

                   

Marcia, you're the locker room

where he eases up after the fight...



    

                   

win or lose.



    

                   

You're the shock absorber for

collisions with ex-wives...



    

                   

models, new wives

and assorted tramps.



    

                   

You're the little wheel without which

the express called Lonesome Rhodes...



    

                   

plunges off the track

and leaps to destruction.



    

                   

I can hardly wait

to read that book.



    

                   

Don't worry, I've spared you

more than you've spared yourself.



    

                   

I know.



    

                   

I know



    

                   

I'll call you again sometime...



    

                   

when I think you're ready.



    

                   

Hey, Betty Lou,

take a look at this poll.



    

                   

I got it up from  ļ/ļ of voters

to   ļ/ļ.



    

                   

  . Thatís a lucky number.

He's going to get in.



    

                   

Hey, Sweet Potato...



    

                   

Iook who's home,

you're big papa man.



    

                   

You're not going to hit me.



    

                   

Don't play the noble defender

of the sanctity of marriage.



    

                   

I know where you were those nights

when Betty was waiting up for you.



    

                   

If you hit me,

itíll be all over the papers.



    

                   

As much as the people love you...



    

                   

You're fired, you're through.



    

                   

I've got news thatíll move you

and shake you.



    

                   

I'm president of

Lonesome Rhodes Enterprises.



    

                   

I own   ļ/ļ of the voting stock.



    

                   

You're in bed with me, Larry,

in bed.



    

                   

Get me Beanie.



    

                   

I think I'll just freshen my soda.



    

                   

Beanie, get Mrs. Rhodes a seat

on the next train to Little Rock.



    

                   

You don't own   ļ/ļ.

You're fired.



    

                   

Fired?



    

                   

Lonesome...



    

                   

Lonesome, nothing happened,

really.



    

                   

This programme is brought to you

by Shelton Cigarettes.



    

                   

I'll treat you like any performer

on my show that flops.



    

                   

I've got a contract with you.



    

                   

You'll get your money every week

as long as you stay in Arkansas.



    

                   

But I don't want to go home.



    

                   

Ed Sullivan wants me to do my batons

act on his show Sunday night.



    

                   

You can do your

baton twirling dance...



    

                   

in the ladies' room

at the Little Rock depot.



    

                   

Marcia, can you hear me?

Get up, wake up!



    

                   

Itís me, big me, the king.



    

                   

Come on, Marcia, open up.



    

                   

I said hurry up on this door,

Marcia.



    

                   

Lonesome's back.



    

                   

Just got rid of Betty Lou.



    

                   

Sweet talking little floozy,

she'd have ruined me.



    

                   

Fix me a drink.



    

                   

What are you doing?



    

                   

We'll have to be more careful

than we used to be.



    

                   

I'll have to stay married

till I get my new appointment.



    

                   

Your what?



    

                   

This is still top secret.



    

                   

The General's been talking

to Fuller.



    

                   

He's selling him the idea

of creating an academy post for me.



    

                   

"In time of imminent crisis

and danger".



    

                   

Thatís the way the General puts it.

Who can rabble people better than me?



    

                   

Hold them in line,

right behind the government.



    

                   

If we put Fuller across the way,

and we will, he's gonna owe me that.



    

                   

Secretary for National Morale.



    

                   

How's that sound to you?

Secretary for National Morale.



    

                   

General's asking him to shake

on it after my banquet tomorrow...



    

                   

launching Fighters for Fuller.



    

                   

Fighters for Fuller?



    

                   

Yeah, how do you like that name?



    

                   

I made it up.

Everybody's nuts about it!



    

                   

The biggest men in the country

are coming to my banquet...



    

                   

to get things rolling.



    

                   

I've got an admiral,

two governors...



    

                   

some investment house boys

and a cabinet minister.



    

                   

Which one?



    

                   

I don't know.



    

                   

I told the general to pick one.



    

                   

They're coming to your party?



    

                   

Honey, if I ask them,

they've got to come.



    

                   

They'd be afraid not to come.



    

                   

I could murder them,

like guests.



    

                   

I'm afraid itís true.



    

                   

Whatís true?



    

                   

Right here, tonight,

you might have that much power.



    

                   

Seen the ratings?



    

                   

  . ...



    

                   

just picked up another million.



    

                   

This old country's just like

my flock of sheep.



    

                   

Sheep.



    

                   

Rednecks, crackers,

hillbillies...



    

                   

houseprouds, shut-ins,

pea-pickers...



    

                   

everybody thatís got to jump

when someone else blows the whistle.



    

                   

They don't know it yet...



    

                   

but they're all gonna be

Fighters for Fuller.



    

                   

They're mine, I own them,

they think like I do.



    

                   

Or they're more stupid than I am,

so I've got to think for them.



    

                   

Marcia, you just wait and see...



    

                   

I'll be the power behind

the president...



    

                   

and you'll be the power behind me.



    

                   

You made me, Marcia,

you made me.



    

                   

I always say that.



    

                   

I owe it all to you.



    

                   

I owe it all to you.



    

                   

All to you.



    

                   

I know it.



    

                   

I know it.



    

                   

Turn the light out.



    

                   

I'm tired.



    

                   

Big day tomorrow...



    

                   

a really big day.



    

                   

A really big day.



    

                   

Come on, come on,

I've got to get some sleep.



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Where are you going?



    

                   

All I can say is tonightís show

is going to be a mess.



    

                   

Now you tell me the show's

in a mess, now.



    

                   

- Marcia never showed up all day.

- I've looked every place...



    

                   

She's the only one

who can co-ordinate.



    

                   

Co-ordinate, hell! Do you mean

to tell me the success of my show...



    

                   

depends on one self-important,

neurotic, temperamental female?



    

                   

I'm fed up with the whole lot

of you incompetents.



    

                   

Nincompoops!

Bootlickers!



    

                   

Would you like some coffee,

Mr. Rhodes?



    

                   

Is that your subtle way of trying

to tell me I'm swacked?



    

                   

Well, I'm not drunk,

just disgusted.



    

                   

I'll handle it.



    

                   

Of course, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

I'll ad lib.



    

                   

Just keep up with me.



    

                   

I've saved the show before.



    

                   

Well, I just wonder what they do

with their afternoons...



    

                   

- One more day like this, and I quit.

- Here she comes.



    

                   

Marcia, where've you been? We've

been trying to find you all day.



    

                   

You know how important it is.



    

                   

We still haven't got

our commercials routine.



    

                   

I know thatís kind of going out

of style, like the corset...



    

                   

but every once in a while,

I ask myself, Lonesome...



    

                   

where's that unmodern,

uncomplicated, unliberated...



    

                   

but oh-so-happy

one-man woman gone?



    

                   

Ain't no use getting het up

about something we can't change.



    

                   

I was duck-shooting

over the weekend...



    

                   

I brought my movie camera along

to show you folks what it was like.



    

                   

Roll the film.



    

                   

Hit it.



    

                   

Hey you, in the projection room,

show us the movie!



    

                   

Mr. Rhodes, they can't hear you.



    

                   

About time.



    

                   

I want to talk to you.



    

                   

I can't tonight, I have to

rush to the banquet...



    

                   

but first thing in the morning.



    

                   

In my office, in the morning.



    

                   

   seconds, Mr. Rhodes.



    

                   

You can take this,

I've quit today.



    

                   

Even after the senator bagged

his limit, he hated to leave.



    

                   

He says to me, "Lonesome..."



    

                   

Keep the door clear. I'm surrounded

by a lot of dumb sons of nitwits.



    

                   

Hey, you redneck scoundrels

still here?



    

                   

Why aren't you out working

someplace?



    

                   

Ain't that Curly Fuller

a duck-shooting fool?



    

                   

You know when we were

standing shoulder to shoulder...



    

                   

in that cold water,

belly button high...



    

                   

and the sun was smiling on us...



    

                   

Curly looked at me,

and he says, "Lonesome...



    

                   

a family that prays together,

stays together."



    

                   

Thatís what he said.



    

                   

I tell you that man

is an inspiration...



    

                   

a man among men.



    

                   

The Cracker Barrel, starring that

irrepressible Arkansas traveller...



    

                   

You're off.



    

                   

I'm glad thatís over.



    

                   

I'm gonna start shooting people

instead of ducks.



    

                   

For relaxation and for health...



    

                   

the cigarette that cleans

your tobacco without a filter...



    

                   

and by Best Friend Dogfood...



    

                   

your dog's best friend.



    

                   

And by Vitajex, that old "Vitajex

what you doing to me" pill.



    

                   

Hurry back you all, remember

what old Lonesome said...



    

                   

A family that prays together

stays together.



    

                   

All right, super one,

and start the crawl.



    

                   

This has been an FBN production...



    

                   

Fuller, the great hunter.



    

                   

He's shaking like this.



    

                   

If they ever heard the way

that psycho really thinks...



    

                   

Scenic design, James Fitzsimmons.



    

                   

Costumes by Robert Hose.



    

                   

Unit manager, George K George.



    

                   

Sell that stuff about

a man among men...



    

                   

to those morons out there?



    

                   

Shucks, I sell them chicken

fertiliser as caviar.



    

                   

I can make them eat dog food

and think itís steak.



    

                   

Sure, I've got them like this.



    

                   

You know what the public's like,

a cage full of guinea pigs.



    

                   

Good night, you stupid idiots.



    

                   

Good night, you miserable slobs.



    

                   

They're a lot of trained seals...



    

                   

I toss them a dead fish

and they'll flap their flippers.



    

                   

Let them listen, please!



    

                   

Marcia.



    

                   

Why, he's a monster!



    

                   

I'm going to call the station and

give them a piece of my mind.



    

                   

We'll fix you, jerk.



    

                   

I knew he'd open his big yack

once too often and blow my   Gs.



    

                   

I cantí believe itís the same

Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

It is, only this time his personality

finally came through.



    

                   

Give me a drink.



    

                   

Got to hurry boys,

itís a big important day.



    

                   

Come in strong tomorrow,

I'll be loaded for bear.



    

                   

Held the elevator for you,

the Lonesome Rhodes express...



    

                   

going down!



    

                   

All the way down.



    

                   

Yes, sir.



    

                   

Central Broadcasting Network.

That line is busy.



    

                   

Tell him I'll never listen

to his filthy programme again.



    

                   

We're slobs are we?

Well tell Lonesome from me...



    

                   

I said, are we paying you network

a $       an hour...



    

                   

to build up our business,

or destroy it?



    

                   

Just a minute, General.

Get De Palma on the phone.



    

                   

Remember it was your company

brought Lonesome to FBN.



    

                   

Keep this scandal from

rubbing off on Vitajex.



    

                   

Disassociate ourselves.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes?

That line is busy.



    

                   

What did he say?



    

                   

It must have been a whopper.



    

                   

Come up with a good replacement.



    

                   

Thanks for not stopping

to pick up the peasants.



    

                   

How's your ratings?



    

                   

Sorry, Mr. Rhodes has left

and there's no one in the studio.



    

                   

De Palma, you know your contract,

the morals clause.



    

                   

Any act abusing public confidence.



    

                   

I've just the boy to fill the gap.



    

                   

Barry Mills.



    

                   

He's a young Lonesome

and a lot easier to handle.



    

                   

Buddy, I'm just a country boy.



    

                   

Don't spare the horses, I've only   

minutes to get into my dinner suit.



    

                   

"L. R's blooper tops Unk Don's"



    

                   

I could never see what people saw

in him, but he's had it.



    

                   

The sinking of the Titanic,

what happened?



    

                   

Marcia, she went crazy.



    

                   

She's in the booth.



    

                   

I hear you just wrote

the ending to my book.



    

                   

Yeah?



    

                   

Just a minute,

I'll see if she's here.



    

                   

Itís him.



    

                   

Marcia.



    

                   

Oh, Marcia, I need you.

Come over right away.



    

                   

Nobody's come,

everybody cancelled.



    

                   

They didn't even send me

a wire.



    

                   

The General sent me a wire.



    

                   

The Secretary of the Interior sent

me a wire, "Regret to inform you...



    

                   

unavoidably detained,

unable to attend."



    

                   

All of a sudden,

everybody's too busy.



    

                   

All of a sudden, I'm poison.



    

                   

Are you laughing at me?



    

                   

Are you laughing at me?



    

                   

You think I'm washed up, don't you?



    

                   

The same way I lost them,

I'll get them back again.



    

                   

I'm going to make them love me.



    

                   

You're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me.

Say you're gonna love me.



    

                   

You're gonna love me,

you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me.

Say you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Say you're gonna love me,

you're gonna love me...



    

                   

Whatís your name?



    

                   

Francis, Francis,

you're gonna love me.



    

                   

Francis, you're gonna

love me, love me, love me.



    

                   

Get out! Get out!



    

                   

Get out, you black monkeys!



    

                   

You turn my stomach.

Get out!



    

                   

Sounds like he's finally

gone through the roof.



    

                   

Marcia, how soon can you get here?

I'm surrounded by traitors.



    

                   

That engineer...



    

                   

wait till I get him, I'll fire him.

I'll burn him over a slow fire.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

If you don't come right away,

I'll jump!



    

                   

I'll jump!



    

                   

Jump! Jump!

Get out of my life!



    

                   

Get out of everybody's life.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

Jump.



    

                   

I don't believe you.

Now, you'll be a...



    

                   

Oh, Mel...



    

                   

Why didn't you tell him

it was you?



    

                   

Itís true.



    

                   

You'll just make it harder.



    

                   

You should tell him face to face

before he blames    other guys.



    

                   

Face to face,

then maybe I'll believe you.



    

                   

Is it ever as simple as that?



    

                   

You've got to force complicated

things into simple channels.



    

                   

Either you go and tell him

you did it and chop it off clean...



    

                   

so he never comes

crying to you again...



    

                   

or you hold his hand...



    

                   

wipe his poor perspiring brow,

fan his smouldering dampened ego...



    

                   

so he can burst into flames

and burn again.



    

                   

Secretary for National Morale...



    

                   

is a job that I was born for!



    

                   

Somebody send for a doctor,

he's been like that for    minutes.



    

                   

In a time of crisis...



    

                   

who else could rabble the people

like Lonesome Rhodes?



    

                   

Who else could move the people

to action like Lonesome Rhodes?



    

                   

You are looking...



    

                   

at America's answer...



    

                   

to the crying need for national...



    

                   

- What are you doing that for?

- He likes lots of applause.



    

                   

Maybe I'm just a country boy...



    

                   

but if the President

tries to stop me...



    

                   

I'll flood the White House

with millions of telegrams!



    

                   

I made him

and I can break him!



    

                   

Yeah!



    

                   

Yeah, you know I can.



    

                   

Because the people listen

to Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Because the people

love Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Lonesome Rhodes is the people.



    

                   

The people is Lonesome Rhodes.



    

                   

Beanie!

More, yeah, yeah!



    

                   

No! No!



    

                   

Ten thousand miles away

from home...



    

                   

and I don't even know my name.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

Oh, Marcia.



    

                   

Marcia...



    

                   

I knew you'd come.

I knew you'd come.



    

                   

Marcia, I lost them...



    

                   

but all I've got to do

is talk to them one more time.



    

                   

I'll say I said that just to see

how many were really listening.



    

                   

Sure, I'll have them eating out of

my hands again, just like old times.



    

                   

Larry, it was me.



    

                   

I'm back on top again.



    

                   

First thing I'll do

when I'm back on top...



    

                   

I'll get that sound man...



    

                   

I'll get that dirty, stinking

little mechanical genius...



    

                   

It was me.



    

                   

It was.



    

                   

It was me.



    

                   

I held you open...



    

                   

on purpose.



    

                   

I'm telling you,

so you'll never call me again.



    

                   

Never again.



    

                   

OK.



    

                   

My little Marshmallow.



    

                   

Good luck with Mel.



    

                   

Run along.



    

                   

I'm sorry, forgive me.



    

                   

Go on.



    

                   

Go.



    

                   

Listen, I'm not through yet.



    

                   

You know whatís going

to happen to me?



    

                   

Suppose I tell you exactly

whatís going to happen to you?



    

                   

You'll be back on television...



    

                   

only it won't be quite the same

as it was before.



    

                   

After a cooling-off period,

someone will say...



    

                   

"Why don't we try him again

in an inexpensive format?



    

                   

People's memories aren't too long."



    

                   

And in a way, he'd be right.



    

                   

Some people will forget,

some won't.



    

                   

You'll have a show.



    

                   

Maybe not the best hour, or top ten.

Maybe not even in the top   .



    

                   

You'll have a show, it just won't

be quite the same as it was before.



    

                   

Then a couple of new fellas

will come along...



    

                   

and soon a lot of your fans

will be flocking around them.



    

                   

Then, one day, someone will ask

"Whatever happened to...



    

                   

whatís his name? You know,

the one who was so big...



    

                   

the number one fella

a couple of years ago.



    

                   

He was famous, how can we

forget a name like that?



    

                   

By the way,

have you seen Barry Mills?



    

                   

He's the greatest thing

since Will Rogers."



    

                   

Beanie!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

I don't figure him for a suicide.



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Mel, if I'd only left him

in that jail in Pickett.



    

                   

Marcia, stop it.



    

                   

You were taken in

just like we all were.



    

                   

We got wise to him,

thatís our strength.



    

                   

Come back Marcia!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Marcia!



    

                   

Don't leave me!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Come back!



    

                   

Come back!











  

 
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