Fools Rush In Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Fools Rush In script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek movie.  This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Fools Rush In. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

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Fools Rush In Script





















I haven't seen that face for a while.

How was Miami?



We opened Saturday.



I hope you packed snowshoes.

JFK took me three hours.



-You in town for a while?

-Next stop is Tokyo.



-You're taking over the world!

-That's the idea.



Merry Christmas.



Central Mexico



How long have you

been following me?



Since you took my innertube.



I was going to return it.

I hope you don't mind.



-Keep it. He's in love with you.

-Shut up!



How can you be in love

with someone you just met?



When I am eighteen, I will come

to Las Vegas and find you.



When you're eighteen,

I will be forty.



Are you going to marry

the policeman?



I wish I knew...



Am I on the right floor?



Who are you and why

don't you work for a living?



-He's back.

-Mr. On Time and Under Budget.



Long time, no see!



-Why the fish?

-It's a keychain.



Why the party?

We still design nightclubs?



Not during the holidays.



-Merry Christmas.




Yo, Hemingway!

Hold up. Not so fast.



I see your divorce

left you shattered.



I found two women who understand

my pain. Don't go in there.




-Charlie Peters got Tokyo.



He leaves tomorrow.

You're taking Vegas.



-I was supposed to get Tokyo!

-You do not want Tokyo!



I don't?

I want Las Vegas?



Everything famous about

Las Vegas is about leaving it!



That movie, the song.

The mob left Las Vegas.



Just get in there!




This could get me fired.



This morning, I closed a deal

to buy a       square foot space...



...across from the Royalton.



If you play your cards right, you come

home to the sweetest gig ever.



-The Midtown Club.

-And who'll still be eating sushi?



Charlie Peters!



We have conference rooms.



He just needed a hug, sir.



It's the holidays that--

It's just so hard. Excuse me.



I'm afraid I need you in Vegas.



Did you say Vegas?

That's my favourite city in the world!



It's a family business. Everybody

in town tried to steal this guy.



That's why I want him.

Thanks for the hustle!



Your keys.

I got you groceries.



Are you sure you don't prefer a hotel?



Too many distractions.



Hot! Hot! Hot!



It's January, for chrissake!



Chuy, I'm not ready for marriage.

And I love you, but not like that.



I think we should see other people.

What do you think?



Lose the part about seeing

other people. You're right.



My great-grandmother said

I should wait for a sign.



That necklace he got me?

It broke.



I must pee. I'll talk to you

when I get home.



I haven't stopped since Nogales!

Okay? I got to go. Bye.



-Excuse me, I was here.

-I would have noticed.



I was on the phone, the line moved.

I couldn't move with it...



...because the cord

wouldn't stretch that far!



I'd like to believe you,

but your nose is growing.



Come on!

That was pretty good.



-You realize I could die for this?

-I pee really fast.



I have five brothers, three cousins

and one bathroom.



-I pee faster than anybody.

-A gold medalist.



This I have to see!



I was just about to say that.



I said not to be a pig

in front of our new priest.



-That's Father Alex, to you.

-I'm lsabel.



All that "waiting for a sign" stuff...


            that religious or cultural?



Do you always listen

to other's conversations?



Do you want to go

to the end of the line?



-Why do you want to know?

-It sounded a little deep for--



It just sounded a little deep

for a Friday night.



Religion is important in our culture,

at least in my family.



Your destiny

has already been decided.



You just have to read the signs.



You don't believe that?



If a bus hits a guy,

it's because he wasn't looking.



Not because of a master plan.



It wasn't fate that you were in

this line when I got off the phone?



No, I think it was more

of a bladder thing.



That's too bad.

Because, you see...



...l think there's an explanation

beyond reason, beyond all logic...



...that brought you

to this very spot...


            the exact same time

I showed up at this very spot.



-You do?




And why would fate go

to all that trouble?



So I wouldn't have

to wait in line.






  Months Later



Thank you.



-We meet Tracy,  :   at your place.

-Alcoholic Beverage Commission?



-The power this woman abuses!

-I know she's important!



She sounded blonde.

Audibly blonde.



She's married to the

county supervisor.



-Don't hit on her.

-I'll get wine.



-Don't hit on this woman!

-I'll make it expensive.



He's going to hit on her.






It's a long story....



-I'm looking for Alex.

-You know, he just ducked out.




I thought I might catch him.



We've been trading calls for months,

but he's always so busy.



-Leave him a note. There's a pad.

-No, no that's okay.



I'm Catherine Stewart.

Our families are old friends.




-He went to the store.



-His car's outside.

-He took a bulldozer, okay?



-He's always in three places at once.

-That is our Alex.



-You've been avoiding that?

-Since third grade.



No one plans to end up in Vegas.

It kind of sneaks up on you.



It's the fastest-growing city.



The economy is booming! Business too.

I'm drowning in paperwork.



Frankly, it's not a whole lot of fun.



Are you a whole lot of fun?



Jeff said we may have problems

with our liquor license.



I'll talk to the county supervisor.



I'd pay more attention

to the ABC investigation.



They'll ask personal questions.



They'd love to catch you

with your pants down.



Then they should look into Jeff.

He actually heads up our...



...pants down department.



Will you get some ice?



And put some scotch in it!



One scotch, coming up.



I'm afraid I'm out of scotch,

so let's go eat.



Quid pro quo, pal.



-Give it to her, she gives it to us.

-I can't do this!






I thought....



-I must have the wrong house.

-No! Wait!



-If you want Alex, he's inside.

-He is?



Excuse me. Alex?



-You have a visitor.

-I do?



-Excuse me.

-Well, don't be long.






You remembered.



How could I forget?

I've looked all over for you.



I would have called,

but you disappeared on me.



I didn't know what to do.

I never did anything like that before.



-Going home with a stranger.

-You and me both!



It was just one of those great...






...spontaneous things.



Yes, it was.



-So, how long has it been?

-Three months.



Do you mind if I have some?

My stomach is not so good.



Go ahead, help yourself.

Want something to drink? I've got...






Yeah, water's fine.



You've done a lot here.



Yeah, I've been kind of busy.



You look great.



Thank you.



So, how you been?




-Really? Pregnant?



Well, that's great. Terrific.




Thank you. It's yours.




We were together one night.



-That's all it took.

-And I used a condom.



-Lots of them.

-One didn't work.



But, its job is to work!

lts reason for being is to work!






...l've thought about this a lot.



And there's only one thing to do.



Oh, dear God!



I mean...l understand.



-And I respect your decision.

-You do?



I believe in a woman's

right to choose.



Good. Because I choose

to keep this baby.



I don't want your money.

The honourable thing to do would be...


            come here and tell you

in person that I am pregnant.



That I'm keeping this baby.



And that it's yours.



But-- Yeah, I'm glad you....



I'm feeling neglected out there!

It's time we went to dinner.



Tracy, could you give me

a minute, please?



-Sorry, I came at a bad time.

-I'll go get my purse.



I'll let myself out.



I know the perfect place.



If you recommend it,

it'll be great.



I'll catch up with you. I've got

a bit of a family emergency.



What are you doing?

What're you doing?



Alex, don't! Alex!



Alex is going to meet us there.



Shit! Sorry!




Oh, my God!



Don't jump!



-What're you doing here?

-Stay off the ledge!



I won't kill myself! But if you come

closer I'll throw you over!



You walked out on me at   a.m.

I never heard from you.



Months later you show up pregnant,

and I'm supposed to know what to do?



I'm sorry, but I don't know

exactly what to do!



That's the best thing

you've said all night.



-This is incredible.

-I love it here.



My great-grandfather helped build it.



He came from Aguascalientes

in the '  s.







Central Mexico.



My great-grandmother is still there,

in a    -year-old hacienda.



Every time I drive back,

I make a wish at the state line.



-Right in the middle of the dam.

-Does it ever work?



It depends on the wish.



My father's going to kill me.



He doesn't know?



No. Nobody does.



Except Lanie, my roommate.



He can be very passionate

about his only daughter.



Isabel, what can I do?



-I'll deal with it.

-No. Really. I want to help.



Maybe one thing.



Come meet them.



-Your family?

-I want them to know you.



Later, when they ask me

who the father is, I can say:



"You met him, remember?

I brought him home once."



No problem. You just say when

and we'll go.






-You eat with your family weekly?

-It's like a tradition.



-Why? Don't you?




-Holidays and stuff.

-That's it?



With my parents, that's a lot.



How'll we do this?



Act like we've been dating

for a few months.



And don't tell them I picked you up

outside a bathroom.



I thought I picked you up.



We've been dating a couple months.



-Who are you?

-Oh, well, let's see.



I am a camera girl at Caesar's.

"Would you like a souvenir?"



That pays the bills. I'm doing

a photography book on the desert.



I have five brothers.

The oldest one is Antonio.



Then Carlos, Juan, Miguel,

Fernando and I am the baby.



But anyone messes with me,

I take care of myself.



Tio Roberto is my favourite.

He's married to Tia Rosa.



She loves compliments.

But talk to her on her left...



...because she's stone-deaf

on her right ear.



Never say "Jesus Christ"

in front of my mother.



My sister-in-law, Petra, and Antonio

have a baby named after me.



-Any questions?

-What's your last name?



Fuentes. Isabel Fuentes.

And you're Alex....




-Right. Alex Whitman.



Isabel Fuentes.



It's nice to meet you.



Hi! I was getting ice.

Everyone's around back.



Who's this?

New boyfriend?



Juan, this is Alex.

Alex, this is my nosy brother, Juan.



-Nice to meet you.

-Does Dad know about him?



And I wasn't going to come!



Good luck!



So, your father,

is he a big man, or...?



Come on, let's do this.



-This is a family dinner?

-A lot of people couldn't come.



Tough room.



What's wrong with everyone?

Can't I bring a guy to dinner?



Hello, lsa.



Hi, Chuy.






It's been a long time

since you came to one of these.



-I was afraid we'd never be friends.

-That's where we started, isn't it?



Alex, this is Chuy.

He's a good friend of the family.



We grew up together.



Chuy, hi. Luke Skywalker.

How are you?




You probably get that a lot.



Yes, Chuy. He is my boyfriend.

Do you have a problem with that?



It's a pleasure to meet you, Alex.

You're a very lucky man.



There's nobody like lsa.




What happened to the music?



Seems like a nice guy.



He's going to kill me.



He's not the one

you should worry about.



My beautiful baby!



Who is this?



Mama, Papa,

this is Alex...Whitman.



It's a pleasure to meet you.

Isabel talks about you all the time.



Funny, she's never said

a word about you!



Tomas, behave yourself.



One minute she's engaged,

then she brings a man with a tie!



I was not engaged!



I was not engaged!



That's one of my favourite things about

her. She's always full of surprises.



Come on, Alex.

We'll be safer in the other room.



Let me take your jacket.



You'll have to excuse my husband.



Sometimes I think he wishes

lsabel was still   years old.



When you're a father,

you'll understand.



-These pictures are incredible.

-They're lsabel's.



-Haven't you ever seen her work?

-Yes, yes, yes, I have.



It's just that

when I see her pictures...


           's like it's the first time.



-That must be the house in Mexico.

-Aguascalientes. And that...


            lsabel's great-grandmother.

They have a special connection.



You can see it in the eyes.

That same wild spirit.



-I can handle my love life.

-Since when?



I think that runs in the family.



This is terrific!

The taste is amazing!



You can't get tamales like this

in New York City!



Why is he yelling at me?



He thinks you're Rosa.



This one's Rosa.



She's beautiful.



Would you hold her

while I fix myself a plate?



-No, I don't think I should.

-You can.



-Hold her head.

-Why? Does it come off?



You'll do fine.



How can so much stuff

come out of something so small?



-Thank you for doing this.

-Are you kidding? They're great.



I had no idea that families

actually talked at dinner.



I'm glad they got to meet you.



-They're going to hate me.

-No. I won't let them.




You'll just make it worse.



Let me give you a number

so you can reach me.



It's better this way.



No complications.

Please, just don't.






...take care.



I will.



You too.



What're you doing?

Get out of the way!



Don't do this!

There's nothing to say!



Wait a minute.

There might be.



This afternoon I couldn't decide

between a burger and tuna.



But my life made sense.

You know?



Now I know exactly what I want

and my life doesn't make any sense!



I was doing fine this afternoon.

It was me then!



Now, I don't know

what happened...



...but between the tuna

and your aunt's tamales....



I actually worried I had met

the woman of my dreams...


            the dry cleaners

and didn't notice.



But then you show up

and I realize that's not true.



Because you're the one.



You are everything I never knew

I always wanted.



I'm not sure what that means...



...but I think it has

to do with the rest of my life.



I think we should get married.

Right now!



Look who decided

to grace us with his presence.



Sorry, Jeff.

Could not be helped.



You're not getting off so easy.




Who is she?



I open the door and you're off

on a date with Jessica Rabbit.



Her name is lsabel.

And it wasn't exactly a date.




That's informative.



Jeff, what the hell is dating?



A process of elimination where

you both present your best side...



...and hide the real you.

That can only last three months.



Then you spend three months

getting to know your real selves.



Then one of you wants a commitment,

the other doesn't so you start over.



I mean dating...


            is stupid!



What have you done

with my best friend?



You and Karen dated five years before

you married. Look what happened.



Wait, you're using the " M" word?



There's a woman on line one.

She says she's your wife.



The only wife around is my ex.

And I am not in.



Ask her if I can call her back.

Get her phone number!



You married her?

The one with the body?



You're married?



Alex, does my life

mean nothing to you?



-It'll be okay.

-No, it won't!



-Who says it will?

-You gamble either way!



You're pissed I won on the first pull

instead of putting quarters...


            the wrong machine

for   years!



Those were silver dollars. And that

slot machine now owns my house.



-She says it's urgent.

-It's urgent. The nightmare begins.



I can't believe it.

What were you thinking?



It's out of character

for you.



Why marry her...unless

you knocked her up?



-You knocked her up?

-That had nothing to do with it.



Not to burst your bubble,

but do you know this baby's yours?



-Did you do a blood test?

-She's my wife. It's not like that.



-You don't know her.

-Neither do you!






I welcome you in my home

and this is how you repay me?!



Stealing my only daughter?!



Getting married in that joke

of a chapel!



Without a priest?!



Without her family?

Without my consent?



You are not a man.

You are a thief, that's what you are!









He disowns me? Fine.

I disown him twice.



Me and the baby disown him.

See how he likes that.



Elvis gave you away.

Can you blame him?



-How'd your mom take it?

-I'm a sinner. She went to church.



-That bad.

-She's lit every candle in the city.



-Hello, my wife.

-Hello, my husband.



-Did you decorate the house yourself?

-I realize it is a little dull.



-It's the cosy institutional thing.

-Not after I spice it up.



-It's just for the next   months.

-Then you turn back into a frog?



No, then we go back

to New York.



-We what?

-We go back to...



...New York.



You don't live here?



-No, I live in Manhattan.

-I live here. I like it.



My family, friends and work are here.

You can't raise a baby there.



People do it all the time.

Have you ever been there?




-Well, there you go.



You've never been off the strip.

There's more to Nevada than Vegas.



-Like legal prostitution?

-That's a guy thing to say.



If it's any consolation,

I hated it at first.



But Vegas grows on you

after a while.



Let me explain something.

Las Vegas is a sandbox.



A sandbox for adults with money.

New York is New York.



You got culture, museums,

and the Yankees!



Every New York guy thinks

there's nothing west of the Hudson!



-Every Las Vegas girl--

-Shut up.



We'll let them talk.



I've saved to do

this book for five years.



I just paid off my camera equipment.

My life is here.



And my work

is in New York.



This is what usually

happens on the second date.



Small, ugly thing biting me!

Small, ugly thing biting me!



Stop it!

Stop it. Stop it, baby.






This is Che, my dog.

I mean, our dog.



-Welcome home.

-I can't believe it's the same house.



I know! lsn't it great?

It's their wedding present.



See, not everyone

feels like my father.



They wanted to do something

special for us. Say "thank you."



Thank you! It's very special.



You don't like it.



I just never lived in anything

so bright and--



Jesus Christ!



Isn't it beautiful?



It's been in my family for centuries

and will protect us.



Can't we just trade Cujo

for a Doberman?



That isn't funny, Alex.

You're hurting my baby's feelings.



What did your parents say?



I forgot they went to

Europe for the summer.



-It's April.

-They like to get there early.



So you did all this in one day?

I should hire you to build the club.



I don't know that you can afford us.



You are so cute.



Here. I'm going to get my camera

and take a picture of my family.



What are you looking at?



So this is where you go every day.



It opened last night.

I got complaints.



The fact that there are no

walls upset people.



It's going to be wonderful.

I can tell.



I wanted you to be the first guest

at our best table.



And I'm very honoured.



Oh, Alex, this is so romantic.



The candles....



And the wine.

I mean, the milk.



And pizza.



It's perfect.



Perfect would be New York

and a Gray's Papaya hot dog.



-What's a Gray's Papaya?

-Four blocks from my apartment.



The best hot dog in the world.



And if we were in Mexico

we would be eating...







They're this sort

of meatball soup.



My great-grandmother

is famous for them.



You have to come

with me one day.



You'd love it. There are no

phones, no electricity, no people.



No kidding.



There's a spot in Central Park,

the Bethesda Fountain...



...where if you sit there long enough,

the entire city walks by.



And I know a canyon

where if you sit there long enough...



...nobody finds you.

And you die.






I couldn't believe it.



The whole night he changed

the subject to New York.



What do you expect?

His life is not your life.



-You're on my side?

-He has a family to support.



We can do it together, here.



Marriage is about finding

a middle ground.



Learn to pick your battles.



-I sure picked one this morning.

-What did you do?



I had the guys drop by

to take him shooting.



Alex is alone with your brothers?



And Chuy.



I better light another candle.



Isabel said there's some interesting

canyons here.



One in particular where people

go to die?



That's the other way, right?



What's this about you taking

lsabel to New York?



That's just an idea.

There's nothing carved in stone.



She won't go.

I bet my life on it.



No one here expects someone

to give up his life.



Do they, Chuy?



What'll you be? lsabel Fuentes?

lsabel Whitman?



Or do a Hilary and be lsabel




That's Mrs. Alex Whitman to you.



Pardon me.



I'm sorry, excuse me.



Excuse me.



I didn't mean to eavesdrop.

Did you just say "Alex Whitman"?



-From Connecticut?

-I think that's where he's from.



Late   s,   feet tall,

dark hair, talks with his hands?



That's him.



I'm sorry, I'm Cathy Stewart.

Our families are old friends.



You're kidding!

Oh, that's fantastic.



I don't know any of his friends

so I'm glad to meet you.



I'm lsabel, this is Lanie.



I've missed Alex the last couple

of trips out here.



He's always so busy.

How do you know him?



-I'm his wife.

-I beg your pardon?



Alex and l,

we're married.



And they're having a baby.



A baby?




Well, congratulations.



Isn't this a surprise!



This is some back yard.

I can see why you like it up here.



It must've been fun growing up.



You know, all these rocks,

the open space, the view...



...the birds...



...the snakes.



Do not move.



Okay, everybody.

We do this on three. Ready?







-What're you doing?








I'm coming!



Lucy, you've got

some 'splaining to do!



Oh, my God.

What did you do to him?



He fell into some cactus.



A lot of cactus.

We gave him tequila.



-The desert made a big impression.

-I told you to make it special!



Not to kill him!



Get out! Get the hell out of here!

You too! Come on!









Whatever you do,

don't turn over.



I'll get the tweezers.



I'm confused.



If babies only see in black

and white, then why...


            Barney purple?

-Dinosaurs come later, tontito.



Wait, don't sit there.



-I'm doing the floors.




I read about this.

This is the nesting period, isn't it?



It must be, because I can't get

this place clean enough.



-I'm sorry. Poor baby.

-I think there's still one in there.



Then we'll have to take the pants

off so that I can take a closer look.



-Whatever you say, doctor.

-I forgot to tell you...



...l ran into an old friend of yours.

Cathy something.



Cathy Stewart?



Really? When?



Last week. The day of the cactus.

I think she's jealous.






I'll get it.













This was her idea.



Cathy said we just had

to get out here...



-...and see what you were up to.

-She insisted. What is that?



A squirrel?



-Who is it?

-I got it, hon.



Now that is a housekeeper.



Did we come at a bad time?



She's just cleaning the oven,

and the fumes are....



Well, you're here.

You're really here.



-Are you going to introduce us?

-Yes. Yes. This is....




-Isabel, right. Right.



It's nice to meet you.



I'm Alex's mother, Mrs. Whitman,

and this is Mr. Whitman.



Oh, my God, you're his parents!



My God, look at me. I'm a mess.

It's so great to finally meet you.



But please, come in.



Very friendly.



You must be exhausted.

Want a drink?



That is a great idea.

Why don't you get the drinks.



I love you.

And I'll think of something.



Who wants a cold beer?




-I'd love one.



Don't tell them anything

until I come back.



She is wonderful.



There must be a lot of good help

here, so close to Mexico.



-Such a warm people.

-Is this a company house?



You'd think they could afford

a decent decorator.



Dad, Mom, why don't you sit down?



What is this?



Honey, is there something wrong?



Yes. I have to tell lsabel

where the bottle opener is.



So how was Europe?

You came back soon.




-Alex said you went for the summer.



You know better.

We hate Europe in the summer.



-Too many tourists.

-Europe in the summer.



You lied to me.

All this time.






-What does that mean?

-You're a liar and a coward.



It sounded much prettier

in Spanish.



Will you excuse me?



Sounds like somebody's

about to get fired.



-I was going to tell them.




-After the baby's born?

-I didn't want to on the phone.



My father won't even speak to me!

But I told him the truth.



But you don't even have the balls to

call and let them know!



What is it?



Do you want out?

I'm not good enough for you?



My family's not like yours.

I never see them.



Excuses, excuses, excuses.

You should have told them!



I wanted to in person. Why is that

so hard for you to understand?



Here is your big chance.



Mom, Dad...



...l have some interesting

and exciting news.



I'd like you to meet

lsabel Fuentes...Whitman.



Oh, my God!



I let them come.

That doesn't mean I have to like it.



-Mama, do something.

-Why're you being difficult?



They aren't her in-laws

because she's not married!



If she's not married,

she has no in-laws!



Why am I celebrating Cinco de Mayo

with strangers?



They're strangers

because you won't talk to them!






...either you act like the man I

married, or sleep with the dogs!



I hope you have plenty of lotion on.



The desert sun kicks off this water

like a mirror.



No, I think that if we just stay

in the shade, we'll be fine.



Suit yourselves.

Pity you didn't bring suits.



Well, we didn't exactly plan for this.



Jesus Christ, is it hot!



Senor, I'd like to tell

you something.



I don't think these kids have a clue

what they are getting into.



I couldn't agree more.







Marriage is a serious commitment.



I think that it's terribly romantic.



Hon, you're not helping.



I must agree with her.



You men forget how foolish

you once were chasing us.



This is different.

They are different.



They come from a different culture,

a different world.



It's hard enough to make a marriage

work without adding to it.



Listen to the man, Alex.

He has a point.



I think they're going to

start spelling words soon.



-Can't you just be happy for us?

-I'm afraid for you.



This wouldn't have happened

if he hadn't gone after you--



Wait just a second, Tomas.

It takes two to tango.



-She's as guilty as he is.

-Now let's just calm down, shall we?



They fell in love.

And love is a beautiful thing.



Ask yourself. Where will you live,

how will you raise your child?



We don't know yet.



You see?



Let's start with the economics.

They'll live in New York.



-Because that's where his job is.

-And the religion must be Catholic.



Says who?



The mother is Catholic.

Whatever the mother is, the baby is.



-What is the matter with Presbyterian?

-That is not a religion.



-I beg your pardon?

-Thomas, Tomas, whatever....



This country was founded by people

escaping religious persecution.



The Whitmans were one of them!



When the west was stolen

from Mexico...



...the Fuentes made a vow.



Even though they took our land,

they'd never take our culture!




You call this culture?



Guacamole and a ghetto blaster

in the middle of a desert?



You're offending Amalia's dip?

What's wrong with it?



In case you didn't notice,

the white people are melting out here!



It was       degrees.

I fried an egg on my head.



And he didn't mean "white."



-He meant, not tan.

-Don't go there.



Your father wasn't helpful

with that Catholic talk.



Alex, the first time I realized

I was pregnant...



...l got stopped at a stoplight

in front of Saint Viviana's.



You know what it was?

It was a sign.



-Of what?

-That the baby would be Catholic.



-At least it wasn't before an IHOP!

-Think that's funny?



Religion is the opiate

of the masses, okay?



Country clubs

are filled with racists.



Right, I agree. Do you think

a crucifix will protect you?



Yes, I do. I believe

because I am a woman of faith.



The faith I have

in that crucifix and in us...



...comes from the same place

inside me!



Now you, on the other hand...


           're not an active Presbyterian.



So, why don't you want me to carry

my faith and belief to our child?



-It's a good thing to do!

-It's not the only thing to do!



Where're you going?



-You aren't my favourite person now.

-Well, you either.



Do you want my advice? Get out now.

I'll even file for you.



-Who said lawyers don't have hearts?

-What did you expect?



Your relationship

is built on heat.



It's like Vegas.

Why didn't they build it on the sun?



You're not the guy to talk to.



I'm the perfect guy.

I know what you are trying to do.



The longer you put this off,

the worse it'll be.



Put what off?

I just said we had a fight.



You said a lot more than that.




...we're here to get a job done

and we're behind schedule.



Cinco de Mayo fell

on a Tuesday!



-The shit's going to hit the fan.

-Why? What's up?



We had a visit from OSHA.



Talk to the foreman. We came close

to a red-tag shutdown.






-I'll handle this, okay?




-May I help you?

-Isabel Fuentes...Whitman.



-I thought you had work.

-I do, but I need to talk to you.



I need to talk to you too.



I feel really bad

about how things have been.



Oh, no.

No, it was my fault.



I haven't been honest with you.



And I was thinking

on the way over....



Hello, lsabel.



-How are we today?

-We are fine.



-You're the father. I'm Lisa Barnes.

-Alex Whitman.



You're in time for the show.



You want to watch?

Come over.



-Will that hurt?

-Oh, no. It tickles.



What is that?



-That's your baby's heartbeat.

-It's so fast.



It's normal.



Neat, huh?



There's the head.



There's a leg.



Wait a minute.



Is that his...?



Actually, I think that's an arm.



It's too early to determine

the baby's sex.



Let's take the first picture

of your baby.



I'm sorry.



Me too.



I could hear its heartbeat

going " ba-doom-boom."



I spoke to New York.

Who's three weeks ahead of schedule?



-Charlie Peters doesn't have a life.

-I'm just saying.



-Where the hell is my crane?

-Foreman says tomorrow morning.






What are you doing here?



I've come to kidnap you.



-This is really not a good day.

-Don't make me hurt you, gringo.



It's his birthday

and I won't take no for an answer.



Will you cover for me?




-Have a good time.



-Thank you.

-Thank you.



Where are we going?



It's a surprise.

Big surprise.



The very first time I came here...


            father told me about a family of

squirrels that lived on the plateau.



He said that one day

the canyon split.



Half the squirrels were

on the north rim...



...and the other half

on the south.



Over time, the two families

became different.



Each one adjusted

to their environment.



The ones to the north are dark,

bushy-tailed, and have bigger ears.



The ones to the south are leaner,

meaner and much prettier.



Even though they look different

and they act different...



...they are the exact same squirrel.



They just grew up

on different sides.



And this canyon between them...



...will they be able to cross it?






I've been thinking

of making you a deal.



If we can stay here

until the baby's born...



-...l'll move to New York.

-That's so great!



I'm not saying I'll like it.

But I'll give it a try.



You got a deal.



Good, then I can give

you your present.



You mean there's more?



I called my new mother-in-law

and asked her to do me a favour.



This arrived today.



I can't believe you did this.



Who said you can't have

the best of both worlds?



This is the most wonderful birthday

I've ever had.



You think this is good

wait till you try these.



Let's see.



This is good.



You've got five men without hardhats,

no load statement...



...the bathroom doesn't meet

handicapped standards...



...and I told your foreman

two weeks ago to build that ramp.



-I'm going to have to shut you down.

-Would you excuse us for a minute?



Stanley, Stanley, walk with me.



You're putting    guys out of work?



I mean it. You got one week.

Anything goes wrong, it's your ass.



If anything else goes wrong,

I'll red-tag this place myself.



Let's go to lunch.



What happened?



-Jimmy, get over here!

-We could take my car.



-It was a sign.

-Of course.



God was saying to quit

and stay with you.



No, Mama, it was

a real sign, with neon.



Then it was a miracle

nobody got hurt.



-When does your husband come home?




-He doesn't sound very good.

-Oh, wait.



Which candle am I lighting?

To keep the job or lose the job?



To keep.



I should have sent you to Tokyo.



Judd, I can open Vegas

in three weeks.



If you could pull that off...



...l might have to

give you the Midtown Club.



-You'd still give it to me?

-You're the best field man I've got.



We break ground July   st.



Jeff said it wasn't starting

until October.



Want me to give it to someone else?



It's just that the baby's

due in October.



-And I promised--

-Is there a problem?



There's no problem.



Look what Petra and Antonio got us.

Isn't it cute?



We have clubs in New York.



We have clubs in Dallas, in Hawaii.

We have clubs everywhere.



So with your help,

and yours, and yours...



...this can be the most successful

club we've ever had.



Honey, let him get the club opened.



He's changed, Lanie.

I can't reach him.



-Something happened in New York.

-He's got a lot on his mind.



No, it's more than that.

He's in trouble, but won't tell me.



-Think he wants out?

-I don't know.



-I've worried about you.

-Me too.



You shouldn't worry.

It's your big night.



Now that the club's open,

we should talk--



I am so proud of you, Alex.

This looks fantastic.



-Why aren't you more excited?

-Well, it's been a little hectic.



It's been a lot going on.



You look great.



I look fat.



Feel this.



The baby likes the music.



There's a teeny little problem

in the kitchen.



I'll see you?

See you.



You and Jeff seem

to be getting along.



I hate talking to men

prettier than I am.






You okay?



-This baby seems to be mad at me.

-Here. Come on, sit down.



Let's go.

Excuse me.



-I'll get Alex.

-No, you won't.



-Just wait a minute. It'll pass.

-I'll get you some water.



There you are.



Judd, this is my wife, lsabel.

This is my boss, Judd Marshall.



Nice to meet you.

It's a pleasure.



Nice to meet you.



You're in for an adventure.



It has been so far.



I knew if I dangled the Midtown Club

before Alex he'd get on track.



-We don't need to talk--

-Excuse me?



By this time next week

you'll both be New Yorkers.



Great work,

but I must get out of here.



Nightclubs give me a headache.

See you next week for dinner.



Nice meeting you.



I'll walk you out.



There was nothing I could do.

It starts July   st.



Have them wait.



-I can't.

-Or won't?



-I have worked too long to--

-To what?



To share your life

with someone who loves you?



-You have to be there, every day!

-Why've I been killing myself?



You knew about this for a month,

but you don't include me.



Why are you afraid of me?



-Why do you alienate me?

-I don't, I don't know!



I told you in the beginning...



...l have no problem raising

this child on my own.



-I thought we were a family!

-You don't understand the concept.



To you it's something you put up with

on national holidays.



Love, it's a gift, Alex.



-Not an obligation.

-Look, this is the brass ring.



I've worked my entire life

for this opportunity.



I won't give it up

because I put a $  ring...



...on your finger in front of Elvis!



Come here.






What happened?




-Second floor.



-Are you okay?

-I'm all right.



Is the baby okay?



There is no baby.






If I hadn't been pregnant,

I wouldn't have gone to your house...



...and we wouldn't have

gotten married.



The baby was the reason

for us to be together.



-Not true.

-I thought it was fate.



But it was just a stupid,

superstitious dream.



There are no signs, Alex.



-We're different and always will be.

-So what are you saying?



-We're not meant to be together.

-Don't do this. Not now.



-Alex, this is not going to work.

-Let me help you!



Get out, Alex.



Get out!



Get out!



Now, come on,

don't be a putz.



I can't believe you're turning down

seats to a Yankee game.



-I have work to do.

-You are killing me.



The girls come two to a bag.

You can't date one without the other.



I am not up for it.

Okay, Jeff?



Well, get up for it, okay, Alex?



You know, this monk thing

is getting old.



-Alex Whitman?

-That's me.



Then this is for you.

Sign here.



-What is this?

-Divorce papers.



You have six days to contest.

Have a nice day.



You too.



There you go. Life sucks.

Welcome to the club.



Now, about Friday.

Come with us.



Nanita, it was the right thing to do.



It is not your faith that has

betrayed you. It is your fear.



I got lost...that's all.



But now I make my own decisions.



How selfish you are. To presume you

know better than love.



He never would have left

if he knew I was still pregnant.



He wanted to go.

I let him off the hook.



No. You let yourself off the hook.



You denied your heart and lied to the

man you love. Why?



Because I had to. If I didn't leave

him, he would have left me.



And I really don't think

I could've handled that.



You will never know love

unless you surrender to it.




-It's Cathy. Is this a bad time?



Cathy Stewart.



-Your timing is impeccable.

-I heard about you and your wife...



...and I wanted to tell you

how sorry I am.



Okay, so listen. Your parents

are coming this weekend.



Is there any chance

you couldjoin us?




-You know what?



You've got a date.



There are signs everywhere.



-What did you say?

-You look lost.



There are signs everywhere

to help you find your way.



South Street heliport.



There you are.



Hi, darling.



Isn't this fun?



I was telling Diane I can't remember

the last time we got together.



Hear you've been doing

great things with that club.



-Wait till you see Bruce's new boat.

-A weekend toy.



-Let's get this show on the road.

-Let's go.



A perfect weekend.



-Are you all right?

-Yes, I am.



I just have a thing

about helicopters.



Well, you just stick by me then.



Here, let me....



Thank you.




Come back inside!






How do I get there?



What the hell's a "tranvia"?



That bus over there.



No, she's not here. She went home to

give birth to your baby.



I don't understand that.



To Las Vegas.



You must be kidding.



So you are lsabel's great love...


            dear sweet boy.



Lanie, please.



I'm probably flying over her now.

When did she call?



A few hours ago. She was in Nogales,

so she'll be here at  .



Why? What'll you do?



What, are you nuts?



Get off the road!



What the hell!

Are you trying to get us killed?



I'm not giving you a divorce!



-You're too late.

-No, I still got till    .



-It's over!

-Get the hell off the road!



There was a priest!

He said there were signs!



What priest?



By the hot dogs! You add

the Chihuahua, the Grand Canyon...



...the child named lsabel.

There were signs everywhere!



-I don't believe in signs, anymore.

-You do.



Yes, you do!

And you were wrong.



The baby didn't bring us together.

It was something bigger!



-I just didn't believe in it till now.

-Don't do this.



I love you.

I love you so much it hurts.



What's going on

with your stomach?!



-Oh, Alex, just go home!

-You're still pregnant!



-You're still pregnant!

-I know!



-How could you lie to me?

-I was afraid, all right?



I tried to reach you, but l--

You lied to me, so I lied to you!



I know, I know.



But I was wrong and I'm sorry.

I'm here now.



Don't you know what this means?

We have a baby!



No. I'm having a baby.

You call      .




-Because my water just broke.



But we're on a dam!



Excuse me. The ambulance

should be here in     minutes.



Is this your wife?



Can we move you

to the main building?



The contractions are

on top of each other.



The contractions are

on top of each other!



I'm not deaf, I'm in labour!



-We're having a baby!

-I hate you! I hate you!



-I hate you!

-They always say that.



You can do this.

You're the bravest person I know.



-What'd she say?

-She loves me. Can't live without me.



Looks like we're going to have

this baby right here, right now.



Give her some air!



-The baby's coming. But I'm here.

-Go away. You're bad luck.



-I'm never leaving again.

-Get away from me!



Oh, baby, don't go, please.

I'm so sorry for everything.



I need you so much.



I love you. I love you.



You're breaking my hand!



I need you to start pushing.



There's a blanket in my car.

It's for the baby.



-I'll get it.

-Push, push.



-Oh, please, say anything.

-I rode a mule.



-No wonder you stink.

-Your great-grandmother kissed me.



You went to Aguascalientes?



The blanket.



-The head's out.

-Okay, breathe. This is it.






One more big push.



-It's a girl!

-She's so beautiful.



Oh, baby.



-That was a little superstitious.

-I don't want to tempt fate.



-Think she'll like living in New York?

-Not as much as camping in the desert.



With a few Gray's Papaya hot dogs.



Oh, no.




-We're divorced.


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