Voila! Finally, the Gossip
script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the movie starring Kate
Hudson, James Marsden, Joshua Jackson, etc. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly
transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Gossip. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally
tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to
drop me a line. You won't
hurt my feelings. Honest.
I'm a girl with a problem.
It's not like I don't know better.
I seem to have gotten involved...
...in a very tempting situation.
I do know better.
But some things are hard to resist.
See my problem?
You look great. Right? This is completely wasted on the library.
Yeah, I know. I got your notes. Very amusing. Can I get one?
I think it's so admirable that you still study.
Some of us need to graduate because eventually we will have to get a job.
Do you guys know that girl over there?
-She's got short hair. -That's Rebecca. She's seen you, go.
No, no, no, no.
Travis, you are great-looking.
And this SoHo artist thing you do is completely sexy. Plus, you're nice...
...which, contrary to what Derrick may believe, is what women want.
-Yeah? -Yeah. Go!
Your friend's real smooth with the ladies.
Bartenders. You guys see a lot, huh?
More or less.
You should hear his life story. Pathetic doesn't begin to cover it.
He's homeless but rich. Completely raised in hotels.
Derrick, you promised you wouldn't talk about it.
His father tours. He's this huge rock star.
I'm not supposed to say who, but if you look at the guy, you'll know.
So his dad's running around, his mom's a supermodel...
...and they leave him in hotels.
They take care of him, they just can't be there.
Is it Jagger?
See, I want to-- I can't. I can't, man.
Somebody at the Peninsula sees him playing checkers with the doorman.
Says, "Who is this kid?"
He's been living there for two years. No parents in sight.
Serious. The night maids are reading him to sleep.
Do you guys want to split?
-Because I sort of struck out. -Yeah, let's go.
Here, let me buy you guys a drink.
On the house.
-Is it Cobain? -Way too young. It's Dylan.
-Is it him? -No way!
You know, we'd love it if he'd do a set.
Yeah, I'll ask him.
What did you tell them in there?
-Nothing. A little fib. -A little fib?
We got free drinks, didn't we?
But I still didn't get laid, did l?
My friend, the sea is wide. There are many fish.
Many, many fish. All right?
Travis, didn't you go to bed?
I had an idea. I was....
We got class.
Derrick, come on. We got Goodwin's class.
I got the rent. I just don't have it right now.
-Travis, I don't need it. -No, I got it for you.
-You just said you don't have it. -Just not right now.
Look, it's my apartment, so I make the rules: It's a socialist state.
I have the money, you don't. Distribution of wealth. No rent.
This is the last time someone will offer you something for nothing.
Take the deal.
Just think of me as your patron. I'm a patron of the arts.
Remember, your papers...
...are due the first week next month, no extensions. Okay.
In a supermarket tabloid ran this story on its front page.
What do you think?
The next day, The New York Times ran this story.
The standard-bearer of American journalism...
...attributed, without apology, a gossip magazine as its source.
Now what do you think?
...news and entertainment are, like, exactly the same thing anymore...
...so how are we supposed to tell what's real and what's not?
Do you have an opinion about this?
In an academic environment, we think about the world we live in.
It may be too much to ask of someone who spends...
...her creative intellect on her hair.
I thought what Ms. Waters said was brilliant.
Webb has come to help Ms. Waters. Her gratitude will be rewarding, I'm sure.
But at least we have someone willing to state an opinion.
Let's try something else. Back that opinion up with an argument.
...gossip and news are the same thing. They always have been.
People tell stories. That's what makes us human.
Come on, Webb.
Connect the dots. Be clear.
People pass a bunch of stories around...
...finally they're written down, then you have religion.
You read the Gospels, they're stories that completely contradict each other.
Matthew's saying this and Luke's saying, "No, this is what I heard."
What's your thesis?
All I'm saying is people are people. We do what we do.
And then we gossip about it.
It might be great if we were more noble, but...
...the stories wouldn't be as good.
And I like gossip. It's fun.
Well, that was exhausting.
-What'll you do for his paper? -He's a prick.
Maybe we should do one together. He lets people do that.
Hey, Travis. How's it going?
Wonder who she thinks you are?
I don't know, but whoever it is, I bet he gets laid a lot.
I had an idea for Goodwin's paper. I think we should start a rumor.
-You mean on purpose? -Why not? We're good at it.
What's the point?
You know, track it, see how it grows.
-Like Telephone. -Yeah.
So start a rumor?
Like Jones is sleeping with us. That's why we live together.
Yeah, no one would believe that.
You never sleep with a girl long enough to live with her.
Well, I might.
If Travis took weekends.
I sit behind you in Goodwin's class.
I thought what you said today was just brilliant.
A beautiful girl thinks I'm brilliant. I like this party.
Come on, Jones.
Who comes to a party in the meatpacking district in a Town Car?
Her father's a very big deal.
Were you going to tell me?
Tell you what?
-You and Goodwin? -Say that again?
I've always wanted to do it. Sex with a professor.
Oh, yeah, yeah. I take all my teachers back to the loft.
That's funny. I heard a hotel.
Who told you this?
You know Naomi?
-No, what's her name? -Naomi Preston.
Transferred in last semester from some place in Vermont.
So who's the stiff trying to warm her up?
Beau Edson. Last guy on campus who thinks she puts out.
Everybody knows she doesn't.
I don't get women who are afraid of sex.
Maybe I was wrong about Goodwin. This looks like jealousy to me.
The quickest way to get Derrick out of my life would be to sleep with him.
That's not a "no."
-Nothing. -You all right?
Hey, Travis. What are you doing? You hiding?
I'm not hiding, I'm just thinking.
Are you drunk?
I'm just kind of having a little dialogue with gravity.
Here we go. Yeah, okay.
I got you. I got you. Take it easy.
-You all right? -Yeah.
Keep your head down.
-How you doing? You all right? -Yeah.
Let me get you a cold rag.
You hang tight.
You are so beautiful.
Come on, Naomi. It'll be great.
...I'm so drunk. Come on.
Have you seen Marie?
She disappeared with Derrick Webb.
No way. Does she even know him?
She does now.
Is that sexual satisfaction I detect?
Hey, a gentleman would never....
Hey, I think we got our rumor.
I already heard tonight's big rumor.
-Oh, yeah. You and Goodwin. -Ha-ha.
Who started that?
This is something else. This girl at the party, Naomi something.
-Preston. -Yeah. Hey, whoa!
What do you know about her?
She's in my calc class. Old money, expensive everything.
Does her math with a Mont Blanc pen. She and Beau arrived in Daddy's limo.
You do hate the rich.
Well, I don't hate you.
-I buy you drinks. -There you go.
I like rich people who are nice. And Naomi Preston is a bitch.
I saw her and her boyfriend in the bedroom together.
I was in the bathroom. I was just flossing and...
...they were in the room making out, and she passes out and he splits.
So, how's this gossip?
We spread it around like they had sex in the bedroom during the party.
You just said they didn't.
We have to make up the rumor, otherwise how will we know it's ours?
This is good. It's simple. It's close to the truth.
It's got room to grow.
Hold on one sec.
-Screw my dad, anyway. You know? -Hey. Trav.
What are they gonna say about him? That he's a sane man?
Give me a little help over here.
Just grab his feet.
-You'll wake him up. -Shit.
Dragging him on the subway didn't wake him up.
We should take his shoes off.
All right, all right.
Don't even think about it.
You telling me it never crossed your mind?
And you do everything that crosses your mind?
Don't answer that.
Derrick, I'm not joking.
You're just as capable of meaningless sex as I am.
Oh, and they say romance is dead.
It'd make our friendship stronger.
Is that right?
He'll never know.
Am I alone in this?
I was right. I felt absolutely nothing.
Well, I felt something!
If we started the rumor three times and then waited for it to come back...
...then we could trace them back and see whose moved the fastest.
Doesn't your head hurt?
Then I thought, "This is not some stupid race."
Besides, people will spread the thing back and forth anyway.
None of the lines will match. It's like chaos theory.
There's gonna be a lot of noise. It's like rapid gunfire.
You really are not in the least bit hung-over?
See, he's figured out a way to make it art.
Travis, this is very good.
Now all we have to do is tell the story.
-If we do this. -What do you mean, "If we do this"?
Wait. Jones, this was your idea.
I know, but I don't have anything against these people.
Aside from the Mont Blanc and Daddy's limo.
So you don't like her, but you don't want to be mean...
...because you're from Plymouth, where the Pilgrims are from, and they wore...
-...little buckles on their shoes. -There were mean Pilgrims.
No, they were too busy giving thanks.
Are we gonna do this or what?
I guess we could stick with the one already making the rounds.
Did you hear about Jones and Goodwin at the Pierre?
So now it's the Pierre?
Let's do it.
The party was cool, although it took us forever to get home.
-This is yours. -Thanks.
And we even left early, before Naomi came down.
She and Beau were up in a bedroom having sex during the party.
I mean, I thought the line on her was, like, no sex.
Not that I judge that. A lot of girls do this chastity thing now. Fine.
-I have to say I was surprised. -Yeah.
Everybody heard after she got here that she wasn't putting out.
Because she's beautiful, everyone was, like-- A lot of people think that.
I think her face is too long, and her nose.... It's me.
I'm just saying, I'm worried about Naomi.
She takes this position that she wants to save herself...
...and then she does something like this!
I think in the long run...
...people are gonna take her less seriously as a human being.
Well, I heard--
I respect women that are not into casual sex...
...except at a party.
I heard, when he put his hand in her crotch--
At first she resisted, but--
You know how these things go.
I heard about that. Like, six guys and four girls getting it on. Wild.
Wait, that was in high school.
-Next thing you know-- -She's holding his crotch--
And her skirt--
-Is up over her-- -Ears.
I knew this girl in freshman year who was always like, "No."
Finally, when she's going, "Yes," it turns out...
...she's wearing rubber underwear, whips and chains.
-She goes down on him. -Right there--
In the window.
She is hot!
-Hot. -Is hot.
Is so hot.
They did it standing on the bed.
Blowjob? Yes. Intercourse? Definitely.
Rubber underwear? Yes, I saw it in her laundry basket.
Black rubber bra. It was so cute, like Victoria's Secret gone...
-What? -She wears black rubber bras.
And apparently enjoys multiple partners...
...on the fire escape.
See, it moves forwards and backwards.
Jones started it. Then she heard it. So you can trace that line back.
It goes back and forth like airwaves.
What'll we do when the semester ends? Hand in your room?
You think I'm a freak.
No. This is very original. It's like....
You're original, Travis.
...I know you, man.
Inside, you're like a piston.
It's impossible to explain what makes it run.
All the shit that's in there.
It's confusing, but Picasso, van Gogh, all those guys, they all had doubts.
That's what made them brilliant.
Man, I can't even pay my rent.
Sometimes I don't even know what I'm doing.
Trying to get at the truth, man.
Jones. Come here, look at this.
Isn't this good?
--totally bombed, had sex while the party was going on.
People were walking in and out, watching! They got off on it.
Naomi's, like, no sex at all. Huge point with her.
Well, I guess Beau's huger. Or is it more huge?
Beau Edson. God, I'd do it!
Apparently, Naomi did. With Beau and even a couple others. The story--
-I heard it from a couple places now. -Listen...
...I don't know why people are saying what they're saying.
Did you tell somebody that something happened?
Naomi, I don't need to lie about sex.
Well, then tell me. What happened?
-Beau, look at me. -What?!
What do you want me to say?
You want to have sex, you don't want to. Now you're asking what?
Why are you so angry?
Well, jeez, Naomi, I wonder.
That's not an answer, Beau.
The first time I heard it, it was...
...some sort of orgy, but that was obviously an exaggeration.
What really happened was she passed out drunk and they had sex anyway.
Is this what they're saying?
See, that's the best part.
It keeps changing.
Four different people already said it.
Four different people told you that she passed out and that....
And then he had sex with her anyway. That's the new story.
Travis, did anyone use the word "rape"?
You said you were passed out.
Isn't it possible that he went ahead anyway?
Well, I would know, wouldn't l?
If that happened, wouldn't I know?
You said you were drinking.
I saw him come down that night. His friends were there.
They asked him if he got laid and he was bragging to them.
What are you so upset about?
This is an ugly turn, Derrick.
You loved it when it was a three-way. How's this worse?
I love it when you get "Pilgrimatic."
Not everybody's saying it. Some people still believe the old rumor.
You know, the multiple.
It'll probably change in a day or so.
It's not something you gotta be so worried about.
It's not true. It's just words.
So how bad can that be?
We were kissing.
And I had been drinking, so I wasn't feeling great.
He pushed me onto the bed and...
...I told him to stop, and he kept going.
I'm sorry, but we're going to need to be more specific.
What exactly did he do after you told him to stop?
...he put his hands under my skirt...
...and he was pulling at my panties, trying to take them off.
...I think he raped me.
You think he raped you?
I passed out. I don't know what happened afterwards...
...but he was bragging about it. He told....
-Everybody knows he did it. -How do they know?
I know he did it.
Hey, you ready?
Why are the cops talking to Rick and Bruce?
-Naomi's pressing charges against Beau. -Charges?
He raped her while she was passed out. You told me.
That's not what I said.
I heard him bragging about it and so did Leslie.
Asshole. He should be in jail for what he did.
I didn't do it.
-Your friends say you did. -They weren't there, were they?
Listen, I admit that when I came downstairs, Bill asked me.
It was like, "Did you or didn't you?" I let him think what he wanted to.
What did happen?
We were drinking. We were making out, and then she passed out, so I left.
You don't recall her saying no?
Protesting? Trying to push you away?
I remember some of that, but....
-She was saying no, but-- -But what?
But she didn't mean it.
I didn't do it!
Travis, come look at this. Zoom in on that.
Oh, yeah. He's got her by the wrist.
You guys heard what's happening?
We have to come clean.
Like Murder, She Wrote.
This is a real cop, Derrick. Her investigation's not a joke.
Why didn't she talk to you?
You're the only one who actually saw anything.
Well, that's interesting.
Could they arrest somebody...
...because what people believe is true is actually more real than the truth?
That's real interesting, Travis. What a fascinating idea.
You need to relax a little bit because nobody's been arrested.
I'm really not sure what you want to do.
How do we do that? We'll tell them what?
We started a rumor that may just turn out to be true?
I mean, Jones...
...I didn't exactly see what went on in that room.
I mean, what if he did rape her?
That's not funny, Derrick.
Hey, I was loaded. Marie was throwing up and Beau shut the door.
You said you were certain there wasn't any sex.
Well, I'm almost certain. %.
The facts shift with perception? I could track it algorithmically.
Travis, he lied to us!
I didn't lie. I may have made a mistake.
The whole point was, you knew for sure they didn't have sex.
Well, I'm sorry, all right? I screwed up. Travis.
This is a mess. We need to go to the cops.
-We need to tell someone what we did. -No.
Jones, calm down, all right? Now think for a minute.
What if he did rape her? I mean, she's saying he did.
If we tell everyone this is a hoax, he'll get away with it.
Is that what you want?
If she filed a complaint, then maybe she knows something we don't.
If he did it, police are gonna find the evidence. If he didn't...
...no harm done. We should just keep quiet.
Yeah. Don't worry about it.
The police know what they're doing, right?
Thanks a lot.
Don't do it.
I'll talk to him.
-Naomi. Naomi, I need to talk to you. -Go away.
-Whatever it is that you think I did-- -Get out.
-I'm talking to her. Do you mind? -Yeah, I do mind!
-Get off of me! -Naomi!
Hey, Beau! Everybody knows what you did!
Get your hands off! Get your hands off of me!
Beau. Don't worry about it.
Witnesses say he was bragging about it.
In interviews, he says that she said no but meant yes.
The rape kit is inconclusive.
As it turns out, this girl couldn't be more hooked up.
Her uncle's a councilman, friend of the mayor...
...who called me personally to see how this investigation's going.
What do you want me to do?
Okay, like everything else in America today...
...this revolution will be televised.
So, what? Now we're supposed to have some big debate on:
"All women are victims, take no responsibility for your sexuality."
Be fair. That's not an argument. That's simply post-feminist backlash.
Like because I have a cock that means I'm a rapist?
We're just a bunch of hysterical bitches.
You said it, not me.
Ever since suffrage, you have to deal with the fact that we can talk.
So who gave them the vote anyway?
Wait, wait, wait!
Like men do such a great job running the show.
If it was up to you guys, we'd be nuked by now.
This would be a great time--
If this is such a terrible thing, how come it hasn't been in the newspaper?
There's a real question. Anybody want to address it?
Miss Jones, your opinion.
It's just gossip right now, isn't it?
Who is it?
It's Cathy Jones. I'm in your calc class.
Can I come in? Just for a second.
Taking a break?
I don't usually drink. I just....
It's been really--
Everybody knows what's been going on.
It's weird, people you barely know, knowing so much about your life.
I wanted to ask, I know it's none of my business, but...
...are you sure about what happened at that party?
-To you. -Are you a friend of Beau's?
No, I don't even know him. I heard he was arrested today.
Well, he should be. He should be arrested for what he did.
It's weird, you coming here.... I thought you never liked me.
Well, Naomi. "Goodwin at the Plaza."
At Fisker's party, you told Sheila.
There was a rumor going around about me and Professor Goodwin.
-You don't know about that, do you? -No.
Well, I don't know why we've never really talked. I guess maybe...
...I was intimidated by the Mont Blanc.
Where are you from, Cathy?
Call me Jones.
I'm from Massachusetts. Plymouth.
Oh, like the Mayflower.
Yeah, it's a great source of amusement to one of my roommates.
-Why is that? -I don't know. He's from Danbury--
I'm from Danbury. What's his name? Maybe I know him.
I don't think so. Derrick Webb?
Is this some kind of sick joke?!
-Naomi! -Get out of here! Get out!
-She said what? -She knows you, Derrick.
-Well, that's news to me-- -You went to the same high school.
We might have passed each other in the hall--
I mentioned your name, she goes crazy. You know her!
If you'd calm down, we might be able to figure this out.
You're so beautiful when you get mad.
I'm not immune, okay?
-You acted like you never knew her. -Listen.
Listen to me.
People tend to remember me.
You know what? I don't always remember them.
So maybe our parents knew each other or something.
-Did she say anything? -She just lost it.
I don't know what that's about. Honestly. I don't know.
Don't mess with me. Not now.
-Jones, not with you. -Please.
Not with you.
Not now, Derrick. No.
People tend to remember me.
You know what? I don't always remember them.
-What's his name? Maybe I know him. -I don't think so. Derrick Webb?
Is this some kind of sick joke?!
-Naomi! -Get out of here!
Son of a bitch.
I'm looking for a student who may have graduated a couple years ago.
Sure. What's the student's name?
I'm sorry, we can't give out information on any students.
I can't talk to you.
I'm trying to help Naomi Preston.
How'd you hear? No one's talked about that in a long time.
I just heard about it.
Well, I don't know how you did. Didn't even make the papers here.
With enough money, you can make anything go away.
You got that right.
Stories I could tell.
The way these kids behave. No consequences for any of them.
So can you tell me what did happen?
-Travis, I really need to talk to you. -In a minute.
He raped Naomi Preston in high school and then he used us to do it again.
I think we could use a drink.
Don't try and deny it, Derrick. I went to Danbury.
-We're back to Murder, She Wrote. -I talked to someone who was there.
Someone who was there. Which would be who?
She's worked there a long time. She knew everything about you.
You heard it in passing from a complete stranger...
...and decided it had to be true.
Tell me what you did!
Naomi and I were together, all right?
I should've told you.
It was finally the right time for both of us, after waiting years.
And she wanted to.
We were both ready, and it was wonderful.
Then somehow, she freaked.
You met her. She's not the most stable person.
You raped her.
I swear to you, no matter what she says, it was not rape.
Generally, women are perfectly happy to sleep with me.
Or do you have second thoughts too?
That's not an answer, Derrick.
I'm sure he has an explanation.
Thanks, Travis. At least one person has an open mind.
Naomi is your classic poor little rich girl.
She's desperate to grow up and actually become a woman.
But she's afraid that Daddy's going to find out about it.
I can deal with that.
But then she decided to ruin my life.
Everyone in my hometown...
...thinks I'm a rapist.
My family won't even speak to me.
"Here's the trust fund, Derrick. Stay out of our lives."
Why that rumor?
I admit spreading that rumor wasn't the nicest thing to do.
I have some anger, okay? I wanted to hurt her.
You say that like it's okay to want to hurt people.
Did you spread that rumor out of the goodness of your heart?
As I recall, you thought the idea of hurting her was kind of entertaining.
Come on, man. This is what you did.
Travis, you did it too.
...none of us intended for this to go as far as it did.
But that is simply not our fault.
Now, was the whole thing a mistake?
You know what? We're in college. We're young.
These are the times we should be making mistakes.
This is the problem with your position about being nice, Jones.
Nice people don't live life.
I don't want to go through life being sweet and polite...
...then realize when I'm I'm just some nice dead person.
Travis, come on.
I don't know.
A couple of us....
I mean, I spread a rumor about Beau and Naomi.
I said they had sex during a party...
...and she knew she hadn't...
...so she thought what anyone might think.
It didn't really happen.
I just said it did.
That's not much of a story.
If you want to help Beau, do better than, "I made it up."
I'm not doing this for Beau. I don't even know him.
I heard that you had a crush on him.
No. I don't.
Have you ever heard of obstruction of justice?
Impeding an investigation?
-That's not-- -Listen to me.
Because I'm not a complete asshole, I'm going to forget that we talked.
But if you start spreading this around, I will not look kindly on it.
Didn't go so good?
See, that's the thing, Jones.
I lie much better than you tell the truth.
Travis, we have to talk.
Jones, I was just--
We have to tell somebody. You and me. I can't do this alone.
Maybe it'll blow over.
It's not gonna blow over. If we don't do the right thing--
What's the matter with you? You want to turn on Derrick?
After everything he's done for you?
You are nothing without him, you know that?
It's Cathy Jones.
No, please don't hang up!
You may not believe this...
...but I'm sorry you're hurting.
I'm a cynical guy...
...and it's no big surprise to me that nobody cares about the truth.
But I know it's hard on you.
And I'm not proud to be the one who taught you that.
Please don't talk to me.
Jones, I mean it.
You're wiping my eyes with a cocktail napkin.
Now, how appropriate is that?
...what do I care about Naomi Preston, right?
I mean, I'm not ruining my life for her.
That's my girl.
What's funny is, she's never gonna even know.
All this happened and she's never gonna even know.
How was jail?
-I heard what you did, asshole. -What are you talking about?
You raped Naomi!
What if it's not true? You heard I raped her?
Is it true you raped her?
The girl has a veracity problem.
Any guy who looks at her is a rapist.
This could help you, Beau.
You and me. She did the same thing to both of us.
Can you give me a hand?
Can I tell you my side?
My side's really good.
Want to know what really happened?
I saw you. I knew what was going through your head.
She was saying no and you were getting off on it.
-Go away. -I just want to talk.
Naomi, calm down. I'm here to help, okay?
I'm calling security.
If you do, you'll never know what happened...
...between you and Beau.
What do you know about that?
You are still the most beautiful girl.
I swear to God, if you don't tell me what you're here for and go...
...I'm gonna lose it.
All right. All right. Okay. Don't be so emotional.
What about Beau?
You liked him, huh?
God, it was like déjà vu, watching you two.
Because you liked me too. You loved me, as I recall.
What do you mean, you watched?
I watched. I was in the bathroom.
Why are you here?
Why are you here?
Why did you come to my school if you didn't want to see me?
Because I didn't know, that's why.
I wish you were dead.
Well, that's nice.
Wow, look at this.
The Wizard of Oz.
You remember that night?
Oh, I do.
Okay. Get out of here! I'm fine now!
Well, I'm not fine!
It wasn't my fault. I wasn't ready.
"I love you, Derrick." And then you ruin my life.
All of Danbury thinks I'm a rapist.
Just stop it! Just tell me what you want and go!
You ruined my life back then. I've ruined yours now.
What are you talking about?
Beau never raped you.
I planted a rumor.
And I made you believe it.
He never touched you.
Yeah. It is insane.
But the thing is, Naomi, I still know you so well.
And I knew you'd fall for it.
You'd hear that story and your imagination would start running.
And you'd think, "I got raped again by my boyfriend.
Somebody I loved. Somebody I trusted."
You didn't know both times it was me.
Here you go.
Just like old times?
Mind if I keep this? I have such fond memories.
What happened to you?
I had a little showdown with the lovely Naomi Preston last night.
Things got a little heated.
You told her?
-Yeah. -And what did she say?
She was cool with it.
I got something for your wall. You'll love this.
Did you guys hear what happened?
No, we just got up.
Naomi Preston's dead.
They found her body this morning.
She killed herself.
-Oh, my God! -Wait. Shut up, Jones.
Are you sure about this?
It's all over campus.
They think maybe she....
It was an accident, because she was drinking a lot and taking pills.
This is our fault.
Oh, please, Jones.
You can't drive a person to kill themselves.
Naomi's weak. She's always been weak.
-Yeah? -I've been banging for five minutes.
I was in the bathroom. Who are you?
I'm Detective Curtis.
You Derrick Webb?
Yeah, that's me. What can I do for you?
-Can I come in? -Absolutely.
I'd take the keys out of the door if I was you.
I'm here investigating the death of a young student...
Naomi Preston, yeah. I heard about that.
Can I make you some coffee?
Yeah, I'd like that.
So you didn't say. Did you know her?
Well, we went to high school together.
Did you see her last night?
Listen, I talked to a Beau Edson.
He says he saw you go into her dorm last night.
He said that? Well, Beau Edson's an asshole.
You know he's under investigation for raping Naomi.
Yes, I know that.
If anyone pushed her to commit suicide, it was him.
This is a homicide investigation.
I'm sorry. I heard she killed herself.
We're not % sure what happened.
We have a dead body, and there was a struggle.
How'd you get the scratch on your face?
I was in a fight.
He looks worse than you do.
I was defending myself. I mean, he jumped me.
Is that how you got the bite on your hand?
Yeah, it is.
So you're saying Beau may have done this?
No, I didn't say that.
I'll get back to you.
They can't really think he did anything.
Then why are they asking questions about where he was?
If he needs our help, let's give it to him.
Travis, we could be named accessories!
What's going on?
They talked to me.
That detective asked where you were the night of Naomi's murder.
-They don't know it was a murder. -It's what they think!
What'd you tell him?
I told him you were over there. You told me.
What?! Are you a complete idiot, Jones?
How was I supposed to know you lied?
-He says you said you weren't there. -You should have told him--
I should've lied for you? Which lie was I supposed to tell?
You told so many. If you'd bothered to tell the truth, maybe--
Thank you for taking the position of righteous indignation.
Why didn't you say you were there?
Your fingerprints have to be all over the room.
Let's not forget who started this little rumor.
You sent Naomi into a tailspin. Curtis might like to know that.
You're such an asshole.
I didn't kill her, Jones.
Then it won't matter that I didn't lie for you.
What did you tell him?
I didn't tell him anything.
They called and I'm supposed to go down there.
You tell them you went to see her after I did, and she gave you this.
Why would she do that?
Just tell them that you were....
You told her about your art and she wanted to help out.
So she gave you this picture. Then you and I met for a drink.
What if they think I did it?
They're gonna-- Are you serious?
No, there's no way. You have absolutely no motive.
Travis, Naomi killed herself!
It's a suicide. We both know this is an insane misunderstanding. We just--
It's too weird.
Wait, Travis. Listen to me. Listen.
Do you trust me?
I do a lot for you, don't l?
The cops are making some serious wrong accusations here.
You know? I mean, I just....
-I need your help. -All right.
Will you help me? Cool. All right.
Can I talk to you for a moment?
Well, as we all know, the campus is abuzz...
...with the news of Naomi Preston's untimely demise.
Now there's a juicy story.
A girl is raped by her boyfriend.
He's arrested, and she can't take the pressure...
...so she drinks herself to death with sleeping pills...
...or something tawdry and useless.
It's a real shocker.
We've all been having quite a time with it.
You'll love this, because today we'll talk about the genesis of these tales.
Where they get started, why they get started.
Perhaps you have some insights.
How do these stories get going?
I don't know. They just happen.
They just happen? Is that the best you can do, Webb?
Lives are ruined, the campus is in an uproar, and all you can say is:
"Shit happens"? I have to say, usually you're a little more glib.
All that deep theory about...
...the Bible and human nature and "Gossip is fun."
Usually you have plenty to say.
I'd think you'd be proud of your accomplishment, even brag about it.
I don't know what you're talking about.
So what you're saying is he made it up.
That's the rumor.
The date-rape scenario was Mr. Webb's imagination...
...and we fell for it.
That's not what happened.
Why don't you tell us what happened.
Jones is the one who started that rumor.
I was completely uninvolved.
She's dead, you asshole.
That's not my fault.
Murderer. He's a murderer.
Listen to you people.
You told that story. Passed it around, having the time of your lives.
You're the ones who are responsible.
I think you've proven your thesis.
"Gossip is loads of fun."
Get out here, Jones.
What's going on here?
Are my roommates here?
Up on the roof.
-You told Goodwin? -Yeah, I did.
-Do you know what this does? -Cops know about Danbury.
They knew I asked about her.
-You got yourself into this! -I won't take the fall for this.
If we had anything to do with Naomi's death, we have to admit it.
You want to go it alone, okay.
But then get the hell out of my apartment.
-Have you seen that before? -Yeah, of course.
I saw this in Naomi's bedroom.
Officer Stevens just found this in your sock drawer.
In my sock drawer?
No. This is my room up here. That's my room.
That's Officer Stevens.
I have to show you something.
I admit, I should've told you about this from the beginning...
...but I have a weakness for my friends.
I wanted to protect Travis. But he's clearly-- He's just off.
Come look at this.
This guy has been obsessed with Naomi.
I think he's stalking her.
Now he's trying to put the blame on me.
I've always helped Travis, but I'm not going down for this.
Look at this wall.
How sick and demented are you to come up with something like this?
I mean, the guy's a sociopath.
There's Naomi. Oh, my God.
Look what he did to her face.
Who would do something like this?
This isn't a sane person.
-Where is he? -He bolted.
Go out there, see if you can find him.
You want me to take this down?
Let me keep it.
Wait, you don't need this.
I mean, this is mine. It's my brush.
I want to find Travis. He's got a very interesting hobby.
But you know what I see?
I see someone who had a motive.
I can put him at the scene of the crime.
His fingerprints are there, and he's got a scratch on his face.
The dead girl's got skin underneath her fingernails.
And I'm betting that the DNA from your hair, it's gonna match.
Get out of my face.
I can't touch you without a warrant...
...but it won't be hard to get one.
I'm gonna leave a car out front. Don't try to go anywhere.
Son of a bitch!
Come on. Come on.
Where are you going?
I'm going skiing in Switzerland, thanks to you.
Planting that picture in my sock drawer...
...that was a super idea.
I was gonna tell them.
Then I woke up.
You must think I'm stupid.
That was your idea, your plan, to make them think I did it.
I betrayed you?
-Perfect. -You get away with everything!
What is that?
You're not getting away with it this time, man!
You're a freak.
Yeah, I'm a freak!
I'm crazy! I'm a menace! Is that right?
-What's the point? -Get inside!
What's the point of this? I'm not going to jail! They got no case.
That's why you're running, right?
In the hands of a really expensive lawyer, it'll all go to shit.
Derrick! I saw Travis. He has a gun.
-Thanks for the news. -Shut up!
-Sit down. -What are you doing?
-He was gonna get away. -I didn't do anything!
Derrick, shut up.
Give me the gun.
You know he killed her.
I know if you shoot him, they'll arrest you.
Are you listening to me? Put it down!
No, then he will get away with it.
Well, then let him.
Travis, we don't need to be a part of this anymore.
I know you.
You can be better than he is.
Travis, put it down.
Look at me. You'll be okay.
It's okay. It's okay.
We need an ambulance. Someone's been shot.
-Am I gonna be okay? -Yes.
Absolutely. Come on. Breathe.
Come on. Come on, Jones.
The cops are downstairs. They probably heard the shot.
-They're probably coming. -Wait!
What are we gonna tell the cops? Let's get our stories straight.
Our story? What's the matter with you?
We just got to tell them what happened, because...
...this was an accident.
You know what?
I should tell them you killed her!
Don't be nuts now! We just got to tell them--
Tell them the truth? Why? You don't! Lying, raping Naomi!
Wait! If you want me to tell the cops everything I did, I will!
But tell them I didn't kill Jones!
I'm gonna let them in.
All right! I raped Naomi!
And that bitch deserved it! But I didn't kill anybody!
I raped Naomi!
And that bitch deserved it! But I didn't kill anybody!
Will wonders never cease?
Derrick Webb tells the truth.
What is this?
When Jones brought this to us I never thought it would work.
And then when you were pounding the shit out of me...
...I thought, "This had better work."
You know what? It was worth it.
It worked better than I could have ever possibly imagined.
Who's the victim now?
Derrick, this is Matt Curtis.
He does a little driving for Naomi's dad.
This is Mark. He's in my calc class.
Thanks for your help, professor.
See you at the Plaza.
It turns out, just this once, I did lie better than you.
What are people going to think?
What are they gonna say about me?
It's only words. How bad could it be?