Hairspray Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Hairspray script is here for all you fans of the John Waters movie (I hear the musical is really good as well) starring Ricki Lake, Sonny Bono, Deborah Harry, Mink Stole, yadda yadda..  This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Hairspray. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

Swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards for more free movie scripts!

Hairspray Script



-Come on! Come on!

-OK, all right.

Will you hurry up?

l'm home.

Afternoon, Miss Edna.

Penny, your mother called.

Tracy Turnblad, can't you say hello to Mrs. Malinski?

Every day she's got to watch that Corny Collins Show.

Delinquents, if you ask me.

lt ain't right to be dancin' on TV to that colored music.

She's just a teenager.

-Good-bye, Mrs. Malinski. -Good-bye, Edna.

Come on, baby, gonna teach it to you

Mashed potato

Feel that groovy beat now

Mashed potato

Come on and move your feet now, baby

-lt's the latest -Come on, honey

-lt's the greatest -Come on, baby

Mashed potato

Could you turn that racket down?

l'm tryin' to iron in here.

They found this dance was so out of sight

To When the Lion Sleeps Tonight

-Mashed potato -Mmm, yeah, mashed potato

Ladies and gentlemen, Corny Collins!

Good afternoon, Baltimore...

and welcome to The Corny Collins Show.

That was Dee Dee Sharp...

and today's bull's-eye hit, Mashed Potato Time...

and, hey, we've got our first telegram of the day.

Thank you very much, Tammy.

'"Please have Lou Ann Levorowski and l.Q. Jones lead a dance.""

Signed, ""Your number one fan in West Baltimore.""

Here they come now. Come on up here, kids.

-Hi, Corny. -Hi, West Baltimore.

Lou Ann, you're a pretty darn groovy chick.

How long have you been a regular on the show?

l've been on the council for five months.

-And you, l.Q.? -Two out-of-sight years.

Not bad.

God, he's gorgeous, Penny.

Look at her hair. Gosh, l wish mine was that high.

And what's your favorite record from the survey?

-Gravy! -Gravy!

All right. Here's l.Q. Jones and Lou Ann Levorowski...

leading our next dance, Give Me Gravy on My Mashed Potatoes.

Come on, baby, l need gravy

Give me, give me, give me, give me gravy tonight

l know you dance the mashed potato fine

But that don't show me that you're really mine

Once we're dancin', we'll start romancin'

So put that somethin' extra on the line

Give me gravy

On my mashed potatoes

Give me gravy

Come on and treat me right

Give me gravy

Baby, you're the greatest

So give me, give me, give me, give me gravy tonight

Link, why don't you tell the home viewers...

where we're gonna be tonight?

Well, Corny, we'll be at the Parkville VFW...

For the Corny Collins record hop.

Stuck-up little spastic.

She's such a queer.

What do you want to hear, Amber?

Shake a Tail Feather, by the Five Du-tones.

Here they are, the Five Du-tones.

l heard about this fellow you been dancin' with

All over the neighborhood

Well, why didn't you ask me, baby

Or didn't you think l could?

l know that the bossa nova's worth a shot

l've seen him do the bird all night

But if that was you and me out there, baby

l would have shown you how to do it right

Do it right

Bend over, let me see you shake a tail feather

Twist it

Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby

You should be on that council, not her.

l know l should, Penny.

Hey, l'm going to that hop tonight.

Oh, let me come.

We'll lie and say we're going to the library to study.

lt's a deal.

We'll meet at eight o'clock, up on the avenue.

OK, young ladies.

l've had just about enough of this screeching music.

Mother, we're watching The Corny Collins Show!

Penny, your mother called all frantic.

She said you are punished.

l'm always punished.

And, Tracy, l have told you about that hair...

all ratted up like a teen-age Jezebel.

Oh, mother, you're so fifties.

Tracy's flamboyant flip is all the rage, Miss Edna.

Jackie Kennedy, our first lady, even rats her hair.

But Tracy ain't no first lady, are you, Tracy?

No, sirree, she's a hairhopper. That's what she is.

Now l've got nothin' but hampers of ironing to do...

and my diet pill is wearing off.

Tracy, l want you to go to your room and study...

and, Penny, don't you be listening...

to every bit of nonsense that my daughter tells you.

lf l didn't know better, l'd swear she was mental.

Now what? More soiled laundry for mommy, l suppose.

Come in.

Edna, have you seen Penny?

Good lord, Prudy, she's right over there.

Hi, mom.

Penny Pingleton, you know you were punished.

From now on, you're wearing a giant ""P"" on your blouse...

every day to school...

so that the whole world knows that Penny Pingleton...

is permanently, positively punished!

-Eight o-clock. -Bye, Miss Edna.

Bye, honey.

Oh, stop! Stop!

What is it?

Oh! Oh, my God!

-What's the matter? -No, get off of me!

Don't look at me!

What's the matter?

l happen to have a blemish!

You had three good close-ups today, period.

Why can't you dance up front where the voters can see you?

Leave me alone, mother. l have a pimple.

Ugh. And you had to choose a colored record...

as your favorite song, didn't you?

That's nice for the neighbors.

You got something against Connie Francis?

Shelley Fabares? l love Shelley Fabares.

Amber, are you listening to me?

We have to have a little talk.

You know, if your father is forced...

to integrate Tilted Acres, we're out of business...

so, at least act white on television.

Leave me alone, mother.

Shake a Tail Feather is a wild song.

lt's got a good beat, and you can dance to it.

Oh, God, of all nights!

A Corny Collins record hop, and l've got craters.

Oh, just pop it! Pop it!

Just relax. Relax.

Don't be ridiculous. Take it easy.

Tension is the worst thing for a complexion.

Come on. Lie down. Lie down.

No moping.

Mother is here.

You have beautiful skin, Amber.'s gone.

Now it's time for you know what

Mother, l know all the dances.

Come on. Get up. Get up!

Practice makes perfect.

l ought to know.

Don't forget, l was Miss Soft Crab in 1945...

and that title wasn't handed to me on a silver platter.

l worked for it.

Now come on. A-one, two...

a-one, two, three, pony!

Mashed potatoes!


Amber, l'd like to talk to you.

Yes, daddy?

-Don't stop. Cha-cha. -l'm tired.

One, two, cha cha cha. One, two, cha cha cha.

l had some new campaign fliers made up today...

all for daddy's little girl.

l want you to hand those out at the hop tonight to everyone--

each and every one of those.

-Twist! -Oh, daddy.

No lip from you, Miss lngrate.

This campaign is costing us an arm and a leg.

New gowns, hairdresser three times a week!

Why, your hairspray bill alone is enough to eat up...

all the profits from the tilt-a-whirl.

You'll do as daddy says...

or we'll send you to catholic school...

where you belong, right, Franklin?

That's right. Catholic school.

Pass the macaroni and cheese... please.

Did you take that appetite suppressant l gave you...

on Dr. McKenzie's orders?

Mother, l'm a growing teenager. l need food.

Let her eat, Edna.

Tracy, did you do your chores around the house today?

Not Miss Tracy, Cyd Charisse herself.

She's too busy ratting her hair and doing the Ubangi stomp.

Tracy, we all have responsibilities in life.

You may think owning the Hardy Har joke shop...

is all drudgery--

unwrapping dribble glasses, checking doggie doo inventory--

but l wuv it.

You'll see. Work can be fun.

Can l please be excused to go to the library to study?

Are you ready?

Let's have a ball at the hall tonight

We'll groove and jerk till the early light

Make the scene with the record machine

And we'll dance and party tonight

Come on...

What's the problem, officer?

-This is a white establishment. -Oh, come on.

Hey, listen, we just came to dance.

-That's not fair. -Open your purse, please.

And everything's all right


And every night is Saturday night, yeah!

Let's go round, bristol stompin', too

Hold me now like it's all brand-new

Any dance that you want to do...

Boys and girls, stay on the dance floor.

Here comes the hottest tune of the day...

and it started right here in Baltimore.

And where did you see it first, kids?

The Corny Collins Show!

A big, strong line, ladies and gentlemen.

lt's Madison Time!

l can do that dance.

lt's madison time. Hit it.

You're looking good. A big, strong line.

When l say hit it, l want you to go two up and two back...

with a big, strong turn, and back to the madison.

Hit it.

No. You dance better than all of them.

Go ahead! Go!

You're looking good.

Now when l say hit it...

l want you to go two up and two back, double cross...

come out of it with The Rifleman.

Hit it.


Now when l say hit it...

l want the big, strong ""M"", erase it...

and back to the madison.

Hit it.

Walk on. You're lookin' good.

Now, then, when l say hit it, it'll be T-time.

Hit it.

Big, strong line.

Now when l say hit it...

l want the big, strong basketball...

with a Wilt Chamberlain hook.

Hit it.

Two points.

Now this time when l say hit it...

l want the big, strong Jackie Gleason...

and back to the madison.

Hit it.

And away we go.


When l say hit it, go two up and two back...

double cross, and freeze.

Hit it.

And hold it right there.

All right. Hold on to your hats, all you continental rockers...

'cause it's dance contest time...

and we've got the wildest judge in town.

You listen to her every night on WEDD...

and she hosts Negro Day on The Corny Collins Show...

the last Thursday of every month.

A warm welcome for the queen of Baltimore soul...

Miss Motormouth Maybelle herself, ladies and gentlemen!

Let's hear it, Baltimore-- Motormouth Maybelle!

All right, here she comes, looking very fine.

Ooh whee! Tiddley papa! l am a whopper!

Motormouth Maybelle is my name...

and, sweetheart, dancin' is my game.

All right! Chubby Checker and Pony Time!

lt's pony time! Get up!

Hey, now, let's party

ln the Union Hall

lt's pony time

When you hear this call

So get with it

Don't quit it

Get up

OK, fatso, let's see what you're made of.

Or it'll make boss lines

But any way you're doin' it

You're gonna look real fine

So get with it

Don't quit it

Get up

Now you turn to the left when l say gee

You turn to the right when l say haw

Now gee, jam, jam, little baby

Now haw

Jam, oh, baby

Pony, baby

Do it, baby

Gonna see little Suzy

Who lives next door

She's doin' the pony

She's takin' the floor

Yeah, so get with it

Don't quit it

All right!

All right, Motormouth, just three couples left.

Tammy, bring on the applause meter.

ls it going to be couple number one?

Or is it couple number two?

Or shall it be couple number three?

All right.

l think we have a winner...

and that winner is...

l love 'em tender, Tracy and Fender.

All right!

Tracy Turnblad and Fender.

Tracy Turnblad, you are the queen of the hop tonight.

Listen, we're holding auditions for the council tomorrow.

You ought to come down and strut your stuff.

Oh, Corny, do you really think l'm good enough?

What do you think, kids?

l hear ya. Thanks for comin' down, Tracy.

We'll see you tomorrow.

Now, Motormouth, l think it's time...

we slowed things down a little with Mr. Gene Pitney.

You can't hide your face in this godforsaken place.

Here in your own city, there's a town without pity.

Gene Pitney, ladies and gentlemen.

When you're young and so in love as we

And bewildered by the world we see

Why do people hurt us so?

Only those in love would know

What a town without pity can do


How can we keep love alive?

How can anything survive

When these little minds tear you in two?

What a town without pity can do

No, it isn't very pretty

What a town without pity can do

Thank you, girls.

And now it's time to move on to a little something...

we call the spotlight.

OK. First girl--Miss Pingleton?

l'm just a little nervous.

This is show business, young lady.

lf you think you're nervous now...

Ha! Wait till you're on the air.

OK, first question?

Are you now, or have you ever gone steady?

Well, l'm not going with anybody now...

but l'd love to date a council member.

Yeah, right.

Come on!

Exactly how many sweaters do you have?

Gee, l never counted. l guess about five.

-Five? -Five?


Nadine Carver, Eastern High School.

Are you aware that Negro Day...

is the last Thursday of every month?

Yes. l've been on it a few times.

l feel the show should be integrated every day.

Yeah, right.

Can you relate to Leslie Gore's music?

Look, she ain't no James Brown...

but l can dance to Lawrence Welk if l have to.

-Lawrence Welk? -Thank you, Nadine.

Tracy Turnblad.

Would you do a pimple cream commercial on camera...

if Corny asked you to?

l'd be proud to.

Luckily, l've never been cursed with acne...

like others...

but l realize the devastating effect of skin blemishes...

on the social life of teenagers.

Would you ever swim...

in an integrated swimming pool?

Oh, my God.

l certainly would, lggy.

l'm a modern kind of girl. l'm all for integration.

Aren't you a little fat for the show?

That's enough, Amber.

l would imagine that many of the home viewers...

are also pleasantly plump or chunky.

Oh, come on. The show's not filmed in cinemascope.

You're out of line, Amber.

Corny, Tammy, can't you see? This girl's a trash can.

That's five demerit points.

You're suspended from the show today.

Pack up your things and go home.

Oh, my God.

But l was supposed to lead the ladies' choice.

l'm sure we can find a replacement.

Please wait outside.

The council will now meet in secret...

debate your personality flaws, and come to a final decision.

Miss Edna! Miss Edna!

Penny Pingleton, you'll wake the dead.

Tracy's not home yet.

Plus, your mother called, and she's on the warpath.

l know, Miss Edna. Can l come in?

There's something you've both got to see.

Well, yeah, come on up...

but l've got ironing, and Wilbur's working.

Mr. Turnblad!

lt's not war with Cuba, is it?

-Or more negro problems? -No. You'll see.

Did poor Debbie Reynolds have a nervous breakdown?

This better be good.

Broad daylight, and l'm sittin' in front of a TV.

l've seen The Corny Collins Show, thank you, Penny.

Just watch.

l just lost a $2.69 Silly Putty sale.

-This better be worth it. -Wait, you'll see. Just watch.

-What's your name? -l'm Ruby.

-And you? -Dee Dee!

-And what about you? -l'm Lucille.

Now, where are you gonna be appearing tonight?

We'll be at the Royal Theater...

-At Motormouth Maybelle's... -All Soul Review.

All right, ladies and gentlemen...

a big hand for Baltimore's own Trinklettes.

l closed up shop for this?

Just wait.

All right, let's keep the music playing...

and the hits a-turning with Mr. Gene Chandler...

because the Duke of Earl loves to cha-cha.

Duke, duke, duke of earl

There! There! Look! lt's Tracy!

Oh, my God. She's all peroxided up.

l'll be damned. Tracy's on TV.

With a triple process, yet.

But Tracy was accepted on the Corny Collins Council.

Mr. and Mrs. Turnblad, your daughter's a star.

Duke of earl

And you, you are my girl

And no one can hurt you

Oh, no

Oh, see? She's already getting close-ups.

Does she get paid for this? Big as a house!

l think she looks pretty, Edna.

'Cause l'm the duke of earl

Yes, l'm watching her now.

You are? Well, thank you.

Yes. Good-bye.

That was Hilda from up Conklin Street.

She's going to send a telegram.

Oh, God! There she is!

Yes, l...

Oh, l'm gonna love you

Nothing can stop me now

'Cause l'm the duke of earl

Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to introduce...

someone very special-- a brand-new council member...

making her first appearance on the show...

and we already have telegrams.

Why don't you introduce yourself?

Hi, Corny! l'm Tracy Turnblad, and l go to Mervel High!

Well, Tracy, someone out there likes you.

'"Please have the new girl lead a ladies' choice.""

l was supposed to lead the ladies' choice!

Tell me, Tracy, are you going steady?

No, l'm not, Corny, but there is somebody l've got a crush on.

Who, l'd like to know? She's just a child.

Well, let's see who the lucky guy is.

Ladies and gentlemen, a ladies' choice.

Hi, Tracy! lt's me, Penny!

She can't hear you.

Oh, she better hadn't dare!

lf you should lose me

Oh, yeah

You'll lose a good thing

lf you should lose me

Oh, yeah

You'll lose a good thing

You know l love you

Do anything for you

Oh, God!

He's violated the oath of the friendship ring!

Aw, don't cry, honey.

You'll lose a good thing

l'm givin' you one more chance

For you to do right

lf you'll only straighten up

We'll have a good life

That fat girl's no competition!

White trash, plain and simple!

For all we know, that girl could be high yellow.

Oh, mommy, daddy...

l'll still be the queen of the auto show, won't l?

Aw, honey.

No, she's not here.

Well, l'm sure she loves you, too.

Yes, thank you. Good-bye.

This is amazing!

She's so popular already!

She could be one of the June Taylor dancers.

Well, yes, l am Tracy Turnblad's agent.

Give me a pencil! Quick! Quick!

How may l help you?

Oh, Tracy, you were wonderful!

Honey, we're real proud of you.

Oh, sweetie, listen.

Tomorrow, if you could get up just a little bit closer...

so we can see you better, OK?

And maybe even give the Hardy Har a little p-p-plug.

Oh, mom, dad...

Oh, Penny, my best friend...

l'm so happy!

Finally, all of Baltimore knows--

l'm big, blonde, and beautiful.

You're a teen leader now!

And the show biz offers are pouring in.

Tonight, we have an audition...

and, honey, this is only the beginning.

Stick with me, and we'll claw our way to the top!

Oh, God!

Fame, fortune, glamour...

and to top it off...

l'm in love!

Wow, Tracy, you're really tough!

Ooh, Tracy, what do you think about this one?

l like it.

Wilbur would kill us if we spent that much money.

You look gorgeous, Bertha, simply exquisite!

Oh, l don't know, Pinky.

Have an eclair.

Eat up, girls, eat up. Big is beautiful.

Tracy Turnblad!

Welcome to the Hefty Hideaway house of fashion...

for the ample woman. Hi, l'm Mr. Pinky.

Mr. Pinky, l'm Tracy's business manager, Edna Turnblad.

Well, it's a pleasure to meet the both of you.

Here, we cater to the big-boned gals like yourself...

who are stylish and at the same time frustrated...

by the lack of sizes in the department stores today.

l saw you on TV. l want you to be my model!

Would she be paid for this?

One free outfit a month.

You start tomorrow.

l hope there's no diets in the works...

because l want to design...

your Miss Auto Show coronation gown myself!

Could you throw in a pair...

of complimentary pettipants in the deal?

You drive a hard bargain, Miss Edna, and rightfully so.

Pettipants, pettigirdle--

you just let Tracy take her pick.

How about a fabulous frock just for me?

Tracy'll have to work one extra day for free.

lt's a deal! Thank you, Mr. Pinky.

l'm going to make you a star!

l hope your father likes this.

He's going to love it. You look beautiful.

lt's the new you.

Mom, come on! Come on!

Go in the beauty shop?

Yes! You haven't done that in years.

Come on, mom. You deserve it.

-No. Wilbur will kill me. -Come on!

Oh, OK. You really think l should?

Come on, mom.

Mama, welcome to the sixties.

Listen, l'll talk to you after biology.

See you after P.E., guys.

ln the figure shown...

line segment AB and line segment CD...

are chords of the circle.

Line segment PA and line segment PC--

What is the problem, Mr. Davis?

l can't see through her hair.

l can't help it if he's short.

Your ratted hair is preventing...

yet another student's geometry education.

lt's feathered, not ratted.

Whatever you call it, it's a hair-don't.

You've been warned repeatedly.

l want you to take a little walk down to the principal's office.

Let's see what he has to say.

Anyway, she was right in the car...

in plain sight of just everybody at the hop.

She was nude.

-No. -That fat thing?

Tracy Turnblad is a whore.

-Happy now? -But, mom, l didn't do--

-Don't ""But, mom"" me. -l didn't! He's lying!

Ow! What was that for?

l'll give you something to whine about.

Might as well just forget that TV.

Miss Turnblad?

Have a seat.

Yes, sir.

Once again, your hairdo is getting you in hot water.

Didn't two weeks in hairdo detention have any effect?

l happen to be the height of teen fashion.

You're on a one-way ticket to reform school.

l'm afraid we're just going to have to change your homeroom.

Starting today, you report to class 10-D, room 108.

Special ed?

Yes, Miss Turnblad, special education.

But that's for retards...

and the black kids you try to hold back.

Here, you will be taught by specialists...

trained to deal with hairdo scofflaws...

in high school society.

Mr. Davidson!

That will be all, Miss Turnblad.

The city of Baltimore has an interesting Catholic history.

lt was named after Lord Baltimore.

He founded the Maryland colony for Catholics and others...

who could not practice their religion in England.

Hey, don't touch my stuff!

l'll kick your ass!

Take it back!

Teach us how to dance, honey.

Come on, show us what you've got, honey.

Go! Go! Go!

Good morning, class.

Good morning, Mrs. Shipley.

Now let's all stand and say the pledge of allegiance.

l pledge allegiance to the flag...

of the United States of America--

And one and two...

and three and four.

Let's warm it up.

Come on, Amber, can't we just be friends?

You're acting like a child.

Here we go with jumping jacks.

Let's go and one...

and two and three...

Now, as you all know, today is special education's turn...

at the dodgeball tournament.

So let's get into the locker room...

put on those gym outfits...

and show them that special education...

is nothing to laugh about.

And three and four--

Hey, look! lt's special ed!

This is special ed?

Special ed in the red!

All right, ladies, let's go. Let's play dodgeball.

Penny, they put me in special ed just 'cause of my hair!

Hey, l saw you on The Corny Collins Show.

Where'd a white girl learn how to dance like that?

Just practicing.

Oh, and watching Negro Day on Corny Collins.

Hey, thunder thighs, this one's for you!

-Grow up, Amber. -God, l love this game!

My mama says Negro Day ain't nothin' but segregation.

-Your mama? -Yeah.

None other than Motormouth Maybelle herself.

l'm Seaweed.

Hey, Penny, see the colored boy--the cute one?

His mother is Motormouth Maybelle!

He's gorgeous!

l'll get the fat retard!

Game over! Let's hit the showers!

Did you see that?

Aw, you're all right, girl.

Are you sure she's all right?

She'll be OK.

lt's not who wins. lt's how you play the game.

Tracy, would you go steady with me?

Come on, everybody

Clap your hands

Ah, you're lookin' good

l'm gonna sing my song

lt won't take long

We're gonna do the twist, and it goes like this

Come on, let's twist again

Like we did last summer

Yeah, let's twist again

Like we did last year

Do you remember when

Things were really hummin'?

Yeah, let's twist again

Twistin' time is here

Round and round and up and down

We go again

Oh, baby, make me know you love me so

And then twist again

Like we did last summer

Girl, let's twist again

Like we did last year

Come on and twist again

Twistin' time is here

Five, four, three, two, one.

You're on the air.

Fatty, fatty, two by four.

Can't get through the dressin' room door?

Hi, l'm Mr. Pinky, owner of the Hefty Hideaway...

3311 Eastern Avenue.

Are you big-boned, got a glandular problem...

but you still want the glamour?

Don't worry about it. The Hefty Hideaway has got it all.

This beautiful ensemble, being modeled by our lovely Tracy...

is available in sizes twelve to twenty-six.

You heard me right.

You need a girdle? We got 'em.

Even got large size shoes...

for that continental Clementine look.

Oh, my darlin'

All at prices you can afford.

Big is beautiful! Hefty Hideaway, Eastern Avenue.

You come on in today. You'll be awful glad you did.

That's our little baby!

She's prettier than Elizabeth Taylor.

Thank you, Mr. Pinky.

lt's a thrill to have you as a new sponsor...

and, Tracy, you keep this up...

and you just may be crowned Miss Auto Show 1963.

Remember, tomorrow is preteen day...

so bring your little brother or your little sister...

or your cousins or your nieces or your nephews...

and let those tykes rock-and-roll on--

The Corny Collins Show!

l've never been to North Avenue.

Don't worry. Seaweed gave me the directions.

Oh, my God! lt's Tracy!

What's your name?

Oh, that's so sweet.

Thank you.

Hurry up! Hurry up!

l got to go. Thank you.

Taxi! Taxi!

Come here! Quick! Quick!

Follow that bus!

-Yeah, this is the place. -Wow!

This is great!

Look at that!

Never been to this part of town before.

There they are!

Stop the cab!

Come on, everybody, gather around

Dig this dance l'm gonna put down

ls it the watusi?

No, baby

-ls it the twist? -Uh-uh

Flap your wings

Flap your wings

While the music swings

While the music swings

Get with the beat now

Get with the beat

Ow! You're lookin' real neat

Come on and work it, babe

Work, work, work

Come on and work it now

Work, work, work

Tracy Turnblad!

You're my favorite dancer on Corny Collins.

l'm L'il lnez, Seaweed's sister.

Well, it's nice to meet you, L'il lnez.

This is my best friend Penny...

and Link you probably know from the show.

Wow, you guys really came. Hey, everybody, this is Tracy...

the baddest white dancer in town.

And this is Link...

and this is Penny.

No matter what you heard...

we are gonna teach the white children...

how to do the bird.

Right! Come on. Come on. Watch.

Come on and work it, babe

Work, work, work

Come on and work your body

Work, work, work

Do the swim

Do the swim

Do the flea now

Hey, miss white lady.

Can you spare me a quarter...

so l can buy me a taste?

Somebody, please help me!

Here! Here! Take it all!

Take it! Take it all!

Please, don't hurt me! Please!

Why, thank you. Thank you kindly.



Yes, ma'am? Can l help you?

Say, man, let's get together tonight

And play some hide-and-go-seek

l said, let's get together and play some hide-and-go-seek

Let's go, let's sing

Ooh, the dirty boogie!

Well, l have a lady who love me, love me

Dig her for her huggy, huggy, huggy

Move on ahead

lf she ain't a hit, you better holler, let her know

Are you ready?

l'm a-gettin' ready

Aw, man, let's holler it this time

l went down the road, the road was muddy

l stubbed my toe, my toe was hurtin'

Move on ahead

lf it ain't a hit, you gotta holler till it go

Two bottles of washing powder, two bars of soap

lf it ain't a hit, you better holler till it go

l went down the road, the road wasn't muddy

l stubbed my toe, my toe wasn't hurtin'

Bullfrog jumped to the bottom of the well

He swear by the devil that he--

l'm not gonna say that!

Move on ahead

lf he ain't a hit, you better holler till he go

Don't anybody come near me!

l'm armed, and l'm prepared to protect myself!

Oh, God, mother!

l know you were snatched, Penny, and l've come to save you!

Ooh, papa tuney, we got a loony.

Don't you try any of your voodoo spells on me, you native woman!

We're just dancing.

Mrs. Pingleton, stop acting crazy!

These are our friends.

Don't act ignorant, Tracy Turnblad.

-Come on, Penny. -Mother!

Come on. Run! Run!

Run for your life!

Don't push, please. Don't push.

Settle down. lt's hot. Please.

lf you'll just stay still, you won't be so hot...

You're gonna do terrific, all right?

Oh, it's gonna be a lot of fun.

Come on, come on

And do the fly with me

Hey, come on, everybody

And do the fly with me

Well, if you don't know how to do it

Just watch and see

You got to shake your hands all around

Like a fly in the sky...

What the hell?

What are they doin' here?

Look what she's wearing.

Hurry up, but watch your step.

-You all together? -Yeah.

Well, l'm sorry, but preteen day is a white only show.

Negro day is the end of the month.

Now, you can come on in or get out of line, all right?

You mean you're gonna turn this little girl away?

Look, l don't make the rules, all right?

Aren't you aware of the supreme court ruling on segregation?

l just want you to either come in or don't, all right?

l have a dream.

You heard the man. You're holding up the line.

Segregation never! lntegration now!

Cut it out! Knock it off!

Sarge, come here. Come here. Hold 'em. All right.

Ok, all you little tykes.

We got a real treat in store for you.

A local group with a big hit record.

Let's have a warm welcome, come on, for The Lafayettes.

-Mother. -Go on.

What are you waitin' for?

Well, life's too short

And you're too sweet

Every day of your life, child

You gotta spend with me

Now let me tell you about Sally

She's really tough

Girl, you're no boss to me

Mr. Collins, there's some trouble outside.

There's a little black girl who wants to be on the show.

Well, let her in, for God sakes.

The station management says no. She's with some agitators.

l'm afraid a demonstration's in the works.

OK, l'll be there as soon as l can.

-Stop. Where are you going? -Wait, l gotta go. Mother!

Tracy, you're a teen helper. You can't go.

You can't change the world's problems in one day.

l--l keep a-tellin' you

l said l told you, baby

Two, four, six, eight. TV's got to integrate!

Tracy, please sit down and stop this, please.

Hey, you, can l ask you a personal question?

No, you can't.

-ls your daughter mulatto? -Why, you!

Look at this!

How dare you call my daughter a mulatto!

Tracy! Tracy, come back here!

Two, four, six, eight. TV's got to integrate!

Now, kids, we're gonna get real lovey-dovey.

l know this is one of your favorite records...

and it's one of mine, too.

Leslie Gore, sing your heart out.

Can l have this dance?


You don't own me

What difference does it make, Mr. Hodgepile?

One little black girl?

Who are you--the N.A.A.C.P.?

But it's an easy way to integrate without trouble.

Absolutely not!

Baltimore is not ready for integrated dancing!

Who do they think they are?

Please, when l go out with you

Don't put me on display

'Cause you don't own me

Don't try to change me in any way

Two, four, six, eight. TV's got to integrate!

Aah! That's the fuzz!

Well, that's it for today, kids.

See you tomorrow at 3:00, live at Tilted Acres.

l don't tell you what to say

l don't tell you what to do

l wanna tell all you people

l dropped a penny in the well

Hoping you would come back soon

l couldn't believe what l heard

My fortune teller told me

My love with you was doomed

l hope her reading was wrong

l hope she was wrong

'Cause you've been gone too long

Oh, come home

Black Baltimore, your mother is ready to show her might...

and fight, fight, fight!

All right, now.

After school, you know where to go--

Tilted Acres, for the show.


All right, now. l want to introduce you to my main man.

l'm his biggest fan.

All the way from Louisiana...

just to see me, the big mamma jamma.

Now, l want a ball in this hall, because he's a real doll.

Talkin' about Toussaint McCall.

l moved your picture

From my wall

And l replaced them

Both large and small

And each new day

Finds me so blue


Takes the place of you

And, oh, my darling

l'm so blue

Because nothing

Oh, nothing

Takes the place of you


l write this letter

lt's raining

On my window pane


l feel the need of you

Because without you

Nothing seems the same

So l'll wait

Until you're home

Again l'll love you

But l'm all alone

And, oh, my darling

Oh, Link. This is so romantic.

l wish...

l wish l was dark-skinned.

Our souls are black...

even though our skin is white.

Oh, Seaweed, will integration ever come?

Oh, Penny, my little white lily...

we're outcast from both societies--black, white.

Our love is taboo.

Oh, go to second. Go to second.

Seaweed, look!

Tracy Turnblad, it's your mommy!

Oh, my God, it's my mother!

-She's gonna kill us! -l'm gonna die!

Where are they?

Don't run, Tracy! You'll fall!

You have heels on!

You'll fall, honey!

Oh, thank God. Can we please come in for a little while?

-Open up! -Please!

Oh, come on. Open up!

Can we come in?

Come on, guys! Come on! Come on!

Like, hi, cats.

Sit down.

You got the fuzz chasin' you?

No, we were--

Wow, you cats are real beatniks.

Just like New York.

Day-o, day-o

Daylight's a-comin', and he wanna go home

You two checkerboard chicks?


You know, black and white, salt and pepper.

Well, yes, l'm a checkerboard chick, l guess.

l'm an integrationist.

We shall overcome someday.

Not with that hair, you won't.

You look like a hairhopper to me.

l mean, your hair is really uncool.

How do you get your hair so straight and so flat?

With an iron, man.

l play my bongos, listen to Odetta...

and then l iron my hair, dig?

l think we'd better get going now.

The coast looks clear.

Let's do some reefer.

We'll get high, and l'll iron the chicks' hair.




When l'm high, l am Odetta.

Let's get naked and smoke.


Don't breathe it in. You'll be addicted.

Later, sister, later... Much later.

'"l saw the best minds of my generation...

""destroyed by madness, starving, hysterical, naked...

""dragging themselves through the naked streets...

'"...burning up for the ancient, heavenly connection...""

-Oh, hi, dad. -Dad?

Don't ""Hi, dad"" me. The whole world saw you on the news.

Penny, this is Dr. Frederickson.

He's a psychiatrist, and he's going to make you all better.

Feeling depressed, Penny? Want to talk about it?

Think of all the white boys in school...

and how much you'd like to date one.

Be a good little girl and slip this on.

l'm telling you, shock treatments are the answer.

Come here, Penny.

What are you doing?

Good girl. Good girl.

l love you, Seaweed!

-Shut up! -Get her in the car!

lt's gonna be all right, dumpling. Get her, doc, quick!

Prudy, this is totally unnecessary.

Come on, honey. Time to go home.

You can see Link tomorrow. Come on.

We've been worried sick about you.

This neighborhood is certainly no place for a star.

Now, get in that car before someone sees you.

Tilted Acres is not fair-- racist people everywhere.

Get out of here!

Go back where you belong!

Well, personally, l have nothing against them.

lt's merely a matter of economics.

Tilted acres will never be integrated.

-Segregation today. -Segregation tomorrow.

Segregation forever!

One black face gets on camera, this show's off the air.

The kids don't care if blacks dance on the show.

Can't you see this is ripping the city apart?

Motormouth Maybelle is out there, and she's our friend.

We've done hops together for years. The kids love her.

Look, The Corny Collins Show remains white...

Or you're all fired!

Good afternoon, Baltimore...

and welcome to The Corny Collins Show.

Yes, we are live from Tilted Acres...

so hop in the car and bring the whole family out.

Right now l want to introduce to you...

the top contenders in the Miss Auto Show contest--

Amber Von Tussle and Tracy Turnblad.

Now, l understand you're both going to introduce...

a brand-new dance on the show today.

Yes, l am, Corny. lt's called the limbo rock...

and l bet some people will find it quite difficult.

Here it is--the limbo rock.

Every limbo boppin' girl

All around the limbo world

ls gonna do the limbo rock

All around the limbo clock

Jack be limber, Jack be quick

Jack go under limbo stick

All around the limbo clock

Hey, let's do the limbo rock

Limbo lower now

Good afternoon, Penny.

Feeling better?

Getting in touch with your anger?

Go, Tracy! Go!

Limbo ankle, limbo knee

Bend back like a limber tree

Jack be limber, Jack be quick

Jack go under limbo stick

All around the limbo clock

Hey, let's do the limbo rock

l watch that tramp, and l'm embarrassed to be white.

You know, Edna, l've been readin' about these kids.

Maybe Tracy could be some sort of campus leader.

Wilbur, it's the times. They're a-changin'.

Something's blowin' in the wind.

Fetch me my diet pills, would you, hon?

Get yourself a limbo girl

And then shoot the limbo whirl

Go back to Africa where you came from !

Your kind's not wanted here!

Well, Baltimore, you saw it here first.

The limbo rock. Thank you very much, Amber.

l'm a winner, Corny.

Well, Amber, you won the dance...

but let's check the election results...

to see how you're doin'.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have an upset!

For the first time, Tracy Turnblad...

is number one with a bullet.

What do you have to say for yourself, Tracy?

lf elected, l plan to represent all of Baltimore...

and today l'd like to introduce a brand-new dance...

and dedicate it to some of my special friends...

who, because of small-minded people...

can't be here with me today.

My dance is called the waddle.

That girl's got roaches in her hair.

Roaches? My little Tracy's a clean teen.

There's no bugs on our baby.

l'm not kidding. l just saw one.

Ha ha! Amber, you're such a comedienne.

Ladies and gentlemen, Tracy Turnblad and the waddle.

You all make me sick!

What is going on here?

Look, we had nothing to do with it.

Seaweed! Come on!

Tracy, just keep dancing.

Move it around here. What, are you crazy?

Come on! Move out!

That's why l would like to humbly state--

Daddy! Mommy!

Daddy! Mommy! Daddy! There's a riot going on!

-A riot? -A race riot!

-Yo, l'm talkin' to you! -Look, l have no--

Everybody just stay calm ! Stay calm--

You leave my boyfriend alone, you witch!

-You scum ! -Stay back! Stay back!

Police brutality!


Black boys.

Police brutality!

Police brutality!

Hey, let her go!

Good evening. Friday, June 5, 1962.

Racially tense Tilted Acres amusement park...

long a tradition of Baltimore fun...

-Penny! How are you? -What are you doing here?

What happened to your head?

lt happened at Tilted Acres.

-Get me out of here! -OK.

Come on.

Thanks for coming.

Come on!

Be careful!

Girl, they gonna flip when they see the new you.

...including Link Larkin.

That's Link Larkin, my boyfriend!

Ooh! Boyfriend!

...common-law boyfriend of Miss Turnblad...

was listed in fair condition...

at Union Memorial Hospital tonight...

recovering from two fractured kneecaps...

received in one of many incidents of violence...

that erupted today.

l love you, Tracy.

Tracy Turnblad is a human roach nest.

ls this the caliber of teenager...

we want representing Baltimore at the auto show?

Amber will be so proud of us.

We're going to go down in the history books...

for this one, Velma.

Tracy's parents had an emotional appeal for their daughter.

Tracy, honey, we know you are innocent.

-lt's Miss Edna. -Has she always been that big?

We joined the N.A.A.C.P.

And we will fight in every way possible to get you released...

and back in front of the cameras where you belong.

God! lt's mother! You've got to hide!


Under the bed! Under the bed!

lt is time that black and white take hands...

-Hey, it's motormouth! -Mom !

We will not stand for racism !

Free Tracy Turnblad!

Now, darling...

aren't you glad that you were punished...

and under psychiatric care?

You could have been killed today.

l wish l was at a hootenanny in Harlem.

-What was that? -Just the TV.

l heard somebody laugh.

Oh, my God! There are colored people in my house!

l'm gonna make a citizen's arrest!

Stop! Stop!

-Paddy, stop them ! -What the--

Come on, Penny!

Penny Pingleton, l'm calling the cops!

You are no longer my daughter!

You are punished even after you die!

Corny, it's a real pleasure to be here today...

in the city of Baltimore at this wonderful auto show.

Thank you. l have my aide here with the scissors...

and we're going to take this opportunity...

to open the show here in the city of Baltimore.

-There we are. -Thank you, governor.

Wonderful to see you again.

How are you doing?

Well, how do you do, governor? So nice meeting you.

You've got some spinach on your tie.

Hardy har har!

Free Tracy Turnblad!

Segregation never! lntegration now!

Free Tracy Turnblad!

Now, just remember...

if Amber loses, she walks off the set...

and then you throw the bomb.

Who the hell is Tracy Turnblad?

She's an upper lower-class teenager...

who was arrested in yesterday's demonstration...

and is currently being held at Montrose.

She is a hairhopper.

A what?

Free Tracy Turnblad!

Jesus Christ! More integration pickets.

This is a political hot potato, and l wasn't even warned!

This came out of nowhere.

We had no idea of her grass roots support.

You keep the goddamn cops away...

before this makes the national news.

Free Tracy Turnblad!

Governor, we must have some answers right now...

for our vast television audience.

The voters are demanding answers...

from right here at the governor's mansion.

This demonstration's gonna turn nasty.

We've got to get answers.

Hey, no police. No police.

Good evening, governor. May l speak with you?

How are you, my dear? Nice to see you.

What are you doing? What is this?

What's with the handcuffs?

Hi, honey. l'm--l'm home.

Well, Baltimore, today's the big day.

We're here live at the new armory...

for the grand opening of the 1963 auto show.

And who will be the dancing princess...

from our council to be crowned queen?

We'll know right after this.

No cops. No cameras.

We're gonna work this thing out ourselves, aren't we?

Madame, you do have the key to these?

We'll talk about the key after you release Tracy!

Stinky, stinky, stombo.

Tombo, tombo, tombo.

Alla, balla, basso.

Well, the moment of truth has arrived, ladies and gentlemen.

-You the audience... -Excuse me.

...has made your decision...

and here to announce the results we have Mr. Arvin Hodgepile...

president of WZZT studios, ladies and gentlemen.

Thank you. Thank you.

We have a difficult situation with the votes tabulation.

The results were quite close.

Technically, the winner is Miss Tracy Turnblad.

Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Quiet!

Shut up, or we're goin' off the air.

Now listen carefully.

Since Miss Turnblad is in reform school...

the judges have found her ineligible.

l would like to announce, on behalf of WZZT...

the winner of the Miss Auto Show 1963--

Amber Von Tussle!

Let's talk this over!

We can discuss this.

Oh, what!

-Let's talk it over! -Leave him alone!

l'll call!

Well, Amber, like it or not...

you're officially Miss Auto Show 1963.

Any words for your opponent...

who many feel was the more popular winner?

l'd like to lead a dance and dedicate it to that loser.

Tracy Turnblad, l hope you're watching...

because this one's for you.

lt's a brand-new dance--

one that l'm sure you'll know how to do.

lt's called the roach.

Too bad you can't be here to do it.

l'm the winner! Leave me alone!

Amber Von Tussle and the roach.

There's a dance

They're callin' the roach

lt's buggin' all the kids from coast to coast

Well, now, form a big line

-To the floor, -Ooh, roach, roach

Everybody now, squish

Ooh, squash

Kill that roach

Yes, there's a roach upon my floor

For Christ's sakes, pardon Tracy Turnblad!

All right!

Free Tracy Turnblad!

You stomp, step, skip, two, three, four, five, six, seven


Ooh, squash

Kill that roach

Hey, hey, hey, hey, now


Ooh, squash

Kill that roach

Hey, hey, hey, hey, now


Ooh, squash

Kill that roach

Well, l was takin' a bath the other night

Checked my hair, it was lookin' a fright

Well, l went down to the store

To get some hair-on


Kill that roach

Let me at him

l'm gonna kill him

l got something for you.

Wait. Hold on.

Baltimore, you are seeing history being made today!

White and black together for the first time on local TV!

l hate you, Tracy Turnblad!

The Corny Collins Show is now integrated!

Yes! All right!

Amber, we're going home right now!

No, mommy! No!

Stop! Get away from me! Get away!

Come on! l'm a married man with a family!

Don't hurt me, please!

Thank you. Thank you.

l love you, Baltimore!

l don't know about you, but l feel like dancing.

l've got the bug.

Everybody's jumpin', movin' around

Nobody's standing still or keeping their ground

You can't tell what'll happen when they pass it around

lt's the bug

You got it, you got it, you're all on your own

Somehow it seems better when you do it alone

What are you doing?

Give me that! Ow! You little...Oh!

Well, come on, baby, let's do the bug

Come on, baby, and give me a hug

Come on, baby, my turn's long due

l wanna bug, bug

A hole in my shoe

Real bugs bug me, no matter what size

Come down! Come down!

ltching powder!

lt's that old bug

Let's dance!


Special help by SergeiK