House Party Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the House Party script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the movie starring Kid N Play.  This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of House Party. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

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House Party Script



This is the party.



Chris! You awake?



Breakfast is on the table.



Come eat this shit

before it get cold.



lt'd help if you

wouldn't call it shit, Pop.



lt'd help if you get

your ass down and eat it.



Pop, Play--Peter's having

a party, and l wanted to...



Finish your breakfast, boy!



Yo, man, you are wrong.



We're homeboys.



Why you pretending like

you don't want to D.J. the gig?



l don't D.J. for free anymore.



Plus, you never provide




How do l get my turntables,

records, and speakers there?



Yo, man, l have the house keys

and the car keys.



My parents--down south,

way down south. We're in.



Let me rap,

and then we'll consider it.



You already got gonged

in the school talent show.



Why you want to embarrass

yourself again?



l've been practicing.

l got dope lyrics.



Def women l'm gonna be

hooking you up with.



This ain't no tackhead party.

Def women like those.



You like that?



l do.



Check this out. lt's Play time.



Hook me up, all right?



That's a weave, girl.



Yo, ladies, ladies.



l know y'all gonna be

in attendance...



at the super-def,

throw-down jizzam of the year.



Sharane, you hear anything

about a party tonight?



Not any good ones.



Yo, wait a minute.

Don't even try and play me.



l'm not beggin'

either one of y'all.



-You have before.

-You will again.



Listen, you know the address.



  :   and you can

bring some friends.



Hey, don't play.



Since you're not into sharing,

l'll get my own.



While you're over there,

give the ladies my regards.






Stab, l'm really sorry.



l'm sorry. l'm really sorry.



No, don't get up.



l'll get you another milk.



l'll pay for it myself.



You need a milk?

l'll be right back.



lf l was you,

l'd kick his fuckin' ass.






You went out like a sucker.



So if l throw with them,

you got my back?



Of course. You know that.



l'm your man.

You know l'm gonna take--



-Hi, Kid.




You finished?

We were about to sit with you.



l was gonna sit a little longer,

so you should.



Are you really not coming

to the party tonight?



Why? Should we?



lt's up to you.



lf you weren't going,

l'd probably skip it, too.



l think you should go.



-We'll probably see you there.




You should be nice to him.



You started it.

"Why? Should we?"



Shut up.



Anyway, l was over there, right?



That's twice.



You conscious motherfucker.



You got a sleepwalking problem,

we can fix it.



We'll break your legs

and kick your fucking ass!



l'll break my leg off

up in your ass so far...



you'll shit sneaker for a month.



-l've done it before.

-He'll do it again.



Why you sweating me, man?



You're wrinkling

my school clothes.



"You're wrinkling

my school clothes."



Yo, wait, wait.



What's the problem?

Your mama can't afford no iron?



Tell her to come on over

to Stab.



l'll put her on the stroll.

She can save up, get one.



He can't fuck with you.



Watch out, man! Watch it!



This punk motherfucker

throwing shit at us.



l smell something, man.



l definitely smell something.



l smell pussy!



-He's a pussy, man!

-Kick his ass!



How you like that, boy?



Do it, do it!



Go, go, go!



Wait, wait. OK, now!



OK, fellas!



What you got to say now, punk?



Your Shaolin technique

is very good.



He thinks we're joking--



Homeboy, you all right, man?

lt's over?



Kid, we had your back.



Yeah, way back.






l'm sorry l almost hit

Mr. Wilson with the Jell-O...



but Stab called my mother a ho.



You see, my mother's dead.



l'm very sorry about

your mother, Christopher...



but you can't fight because you

have a chip on your shoulder.



You're a good student,

so go back to class.



But your father

will have to be notified.



As for you, young man...



l'm tired of seeing you

in this office.



Could you tell me

why in God's name...



you called his mother

a garden tool?



How mad could he be?



Maybe the school

didn't even call him.



l'm so glad you're home.



Sit down. l need to talk to you.



What's up, Pop?



l'm making some Dick Gregory.

You want some?



No, thanks, Pop.



You know l need this stuff, boy.



l got a weight problem.

Can't wait to eat.



Pop, are these the only...



pieces of mail you got today?



Just some bills.

You want to pay them?






Bila? Bilyle?



Whatever your name is,

what you want?



lt's for you.



l'll take it upstairs.



Why they name that boy

that African name?



They from Cleveland.



Yo, what's up?



Kid, have you talked to Play?



l been calling his house.

Nobody answers.



He was supposed

to come pick me up.



l haven't spoke to him.



l'm really sweating

this pink slip from school.



lf Pops finds out l got

in trouble in school today...



l'm definitely gonna be

on punishment.



You're still

worrying about that?



lf you ain't got a letter yet...



then they'll call

your house after  :  .



That's when they expect

your parents to be home.



Shit. What do l do?



Just leave and don't come back

till after the party.



l still got to get dressed.



l can't come

to the set stinking.



Throw some Brut on

and meet me at the party.



Chris, get off the phone

and come down here.



l got to jet.

l'll see you tonight.



All right, man. Peace.



Don't tie up the telephone

talking to your friends.



l'm expecting a call

for some overtime.



OK, Pop.



There's a party

at Play--Peter's house.



-Can l go?

-On a school night?



l'll make sure l'm back

before curfew.



Oh, man.

l had plans for us tonight.



l rented a couple of videos.




You like "Dolemite."

You grew up on it.



All right.

lf you got to, you got to.



But after you finish

your homework.



No problem, Pop.



What's wrong with you?

Don't like "Dolemite"?



"Way down in the jungle deep...



"bad-ass lion stepped on

the signifyin' monkey's feet."



Toe to toe,

Kid 'n Play is on a roll again



lt's only right that we

keep the crowd dancin'



Rhymes are dope,

the tempo is steady



You ready? Let's rip up

the floor like confetti



Y'all, l got a great

new album in the mail today.



Onyx Communications

and Hey Love Productions...



proudly present "Hey Love."



All the commercials

they showin' nowadays.



God. Every TV station.



Cut the television off,

comin' through the damn walls.



The incomparable Delfonics

and much, much more.



l got to get this fan fixed.



lt was so hot in here

last night...



l saw the devil

sittin' in the living room.



Shit. Niggers ain't gonna

break my mama's good stuff.



Let 'em fuck with this plastic.



What up?

Play Martin in the place to be.



The place to be

is my house an hour ago.



lf you want a D.J.,

stop smokin' that crack...



and drive your mother's

raggedy-ass Chevy over here!



Chill, man.

l'll jet over in one minute.



l don't like fooling

with you, man.



Come on now, Play!



All right!



l love you.



Kid, answer the door!



Answer the door.

l'll get the phone.



Yeah, what's up?



l sure was depending on

that overtime.



Give me that letter.

Are you retarded?



No, l wasn't talking to you.



Crazy mophead boy of mine.



Ready to cut his hair off.



Look like a young tree stump

walkin' around here.



What's old James up to?



Let me call you back later.



l got somethin' to take care of.



Can you explain this?



He called Mom out a name.



Don't you think

it's been long enough?



l am sick of you using

your mother for an excuse.



l wasn't using her as an excuse.



Then why didn't you tell me

when you got home?



Why you try to hide it?



l didn't think it was important.



No? Your school thought

it was important.



You'll spend tonight thinking

about your priorities...



after you finish

your damn homework.



You said

l could go to the party.



Them hoods you fought with

will be there...



and you don't need

no more trouble.



lt's not that type of crowd.



All my friends will be there.



l don't care if Marvin Gaye

will be there. You won't!



You don't know

how to act no way.



Last time, you didn't come in

till l went to work.



lf you let me go this time,

l'll be back before curfew.



lt'd be different

if Peter's parents were there.



l wouldn't mind you going.



But they ain't.

They work nights just like l do.



Matter of fact,

them folks is out of town.



You kids think you slick,

don't you?



Every little step you take

will be around this bedroom.



Believe it.

You're not goin' nowhere.



You're gonna make me

a social misfit.



l'm tryin' to make you

a responsible person.



But l am responsible.



Listen, get your act together.



Keep your mind on them books

and off them gals.



'Cause you will make

the same mistake l did.



Look, l'm sorry.



l'm sorry.

l shouldn't have said that.



l'm sorry.



l'm under a lot of pressure.

l'm sorry.



But you ain't goin'

to that damn party.



l don't give a damn

what you say.



That's why l hate messin'

with them.



We got to get going.

No time to waste.



Who's that in the car, Play?



That's a honey.

l know what you're thinking.



That ain't for you,

but there'll be a lot more.



We can't fit

a lot of equipment...



and three people

in that little-ass car!



You don't know how

to load things scientifically.



Leave it!

You're tearing my shit!






Shit! What the--



Just leave it alone! Don't!



Play, leave it alone!



Just leave it! l'll do it!



Leave it alone!



Hey, l'm--Hey!



There it is. We got it.



Where am l supposed to sit?



Get out! She's gonna walk!



She's gonna walk!



Of course you can fit.

Try the other side.



You can get in right over--



Excuse me one minute.



Yes, baby?



l don't even appreciate

how you treatin' me.



l'm real sorry, baby.



l do appreciate

the way you look.



No. Don't touch me!



l'll tell you what.



l'll run this over to my crib

and be right back.



Be right back? Kiss my ass!



You gonna take

my equipment and leave me?



No! l ain't goin' for it!



What else can l do?



Kick that bitch to the curb

and let me ride.



l'm the D.J., man.



Who you callin' a bitch?

Your mama's a bitch.



-My mama ain't no bitch.

-lf l am, she is.



l'll kick your ass!

l'll fight a girl!



l know.

l seen a couple beat you.



l can't. lt would be cold.




she's packed in real good.



Look, no.



You know what, man?

l fucked up today.



l owe you one,

and l'll be right back for you.



-No, you ain't.

-He's got nerve.



l'll kick both of your asses.



Play, don't play.

Don't do that!



Don't drive off!



l'll say it calmly.

Maybe l was hollering.



Play, don't play.



l love you!



Play! Damn!



Hold on, man.

Somebody's at the door.



lt's Sidney.



Yeah, she's a trip.



You know who she is.

You like her.



Go ahead and wait

in the living room...



with your big nose.



Punk. Hi, everybody.



No, man, l said   :  .

l didn't say  :  .



l ain't going

to no party at  :  .




-l'm coming!



There'll be

fine women at the party.



Why bring a girl with you?



The incomparable Delfonics

and much, much more.



This is a fantastic album.

Let me borrow it.



No, my brother.

You've got to buy your own.



Come on, girl.



l said l was coming.

You always rushin'.






My nails are wet.

Let's go outside while they dry.



Leave her at home, man.

She's ugly.



l can't wait to do that dance.



You know the one we been doin'?



Wait, l'm comin' back out.



You move, you lose.



-Come on, Sharane.




She gets on my nerves.



l don't know

if l like my outfit.



Why? You matchin'.



l think l match too much.



l told you about them

Garanimal outfits from K-Mart.



Why you tryin' to dis me?



Want some Kool-Aid?



Peanut, bring us

two glasses of Kool-Aid.



You know l'll ask you

to borrow that tomorrow.



-There ain't no more.

-Make some.



l won't give it to you.







-Grape or red?




Peanut, fix me

some of that Dick Gregory.



Who's supposed to be there?






Dragon-breath Bilal.



And your man, Kid.



You go, girl. Yours.



Don't even try it!

That is your man!



l don't know why

you keep sweatin' him.



He got a cute thing happenin'.



He's just so young-actin'.



He needs to chill from hangin'

with his crew and grow up...



then maybe l'll give him some.



You ain't givin' nobody nothin'.



-Don't even try it!




And l'm gonna give you

details blow by blow.



l'm gonna get my coat.



OK. Bye, everybody.



Bye, Grandma.



You drink that, Peanut.

We out of here.



Look at all that sugar.



Just thinkin' about that stuff

makes my teeth hurt.



That's good, girl.

What you talkin' about?



Way down in the jungle deep...



the lion stepped on

the signifyin' monkey's feet.



The monkey said,

"Motherfucker, can't you see?"



"You're standin'

on my goddamn feet."



B-love, yo, bust it!



What's up, cuz?



Bet you thought l cut you,

but l came back as promised.



l ain't goin'.



What do you mean

you ain't goin'?



Read my lips.



l've been waiting an hour

to tell you l'm not going.



You're just a little upset--



This is why

l don't D.J. for free.



'Cause niggers

don't be appreciating shit.



-l don't appreciate nothin'?

-No, you don't.



Man, take a look in that car.



There's too many for me

to handle.



They all goin' to the party...



and all they asked was,

"Who's the D.J.?"



So l brought them over...



so you could jump-start

before the other brothers.



ls that supposed to convince me?



Ladies, B-love's in the house.






Who you talkin' to?



Look at this hair.




Where you going?



Why do you want to know?



We'll ask the questions,

you answer them.



Yes, sir.



Want to check him for lD?



We're out of doughnuts.



What? Jesus, let's go.



You watch yourself, understand?

'Cause we are.



Thank you, Cagney and Lacey.



Hey, what are you doing?



My rhymes!



Roll it back!

Smash him ! Kill him !



Get him ! Get him !



Yeah, baby, yeah.



Whose pussy is this, baby? Who?



Whose pussy, baby?






You fine motherfucker!

Oh, shit.



You fine motherfucker, you.



Come here! Give me that pussy!



Shit! Yeah. Right there.



Right there!



Let me see! Let me see!



Yes, baby! Right there!



Yes, baby! Yeah!



Oh, shit!



There he is--



What was that?



Jive motherfuckers!



Stay away from

this motherfuckin' window!



Fuckin' peep-freaks.



Yo, wasn't that Kid?



Was it?

l got to get to the party, man.



Ain't no room in here anyway.



That's cold. Hi.



Aw, man.



Oh, shit!



Here's another dusty one

for you dusties.



Hope you all got

your Medicaid together.



Who's that?



Hey, Pops.

What they got you doing?



What's to it, man?



Playin' for

the elephant graveyard, man.



Dead tired. lt's a gig, man.



What you got

in the crate over there?



Some Platters, lnk Spots...



Mills Brothers, Count Basie,

Big Joe Turner.



Slap some of them old sides

on the turntable...



get a little scratchin'

and mixin' goin' on...



l'll grab the microphone,

and we can get busy.



Do that again.



You just grab...



Let's kick his--



Chill. The punk is mine.



Kick it, Pops!



One, two. One, two.



Hey, everybody,

my name is Kid.



How y'all feelin'?



Just throw your hands

in the air.



Just wave your hands in the air!

Come on!



Wave your hands in the air!

That's right.



Throw your hands

in the air, all right?



Wave your hands in the air.



Throw, throw...



Oh, dear!



Get the hell back there!



You want to see how crazy l am?



What you lookin' at?



Yo, Mandingo,

leave the brother alone.



Sucker, you want

another part in your head?



Lighten up.



Yeah, l did it.



l might cry two tears

in a bucket. Fuck it.



Let's take it to the stage.



Sorry, sir.



Look, Officer,

it was just an accident.



We don't want to press charges.



They've been in

a few accidents this evening.



l don't think you should

let this slide by.



They need discipline,

not solitary confinement.



That's true.



Thank you very much.



Too scared to make a statement.



-They're not gonna talk?




They're not gonna press charges?



You perpetrators

were very lucky tonight.



Apparently these people

aren't gonna press charges.



So you're gonna get up,

go home, and go to bed.



But before you do...



l want you to repeat after me.






l am...






l am !



Come on, with feeling.



l am...









Oh, really.



This is ridiculous.



That's good.

Now get up and go home.



Beat it! Hold it!



Let him go. You go that way.






The place to be.



-Got some gum, man?







What's up, Play?



Chill! Herman, man.



Make yourself at home.



Too many hard-legs here.

Need more women.



LaDonna! How you doin', baby?



Lookin' real good.



How about giving me

those digits?



Step off.



Baby, l'm taking you places,

meetin' people.



-Clinton, homes.

-What's up, money?



Glad you could make it.



l want you

to meet my lady, um...






lt's a pleasure to meet you.



l hope l have the opportunity

of dancing with you later.



We'll see about that.



LaShay, how you doin'?



Don't you have any refreshments?



Some soda or potato chips?



You should've got here earlier.

l had everything.



Liter bottles, potato chips,

the whole shebang.



Brothers went through it.



l always get here

too late for the snacks.



There's a store

right up the street.



Anything you want.

Help yourself.



Mama should have fed you

before you got here.



This ain't no soup kitchen.



Yo, what's up, man?



What's up?



Glad you showed up.

What's with your pops?



How much more trouble

can l get into?



A beat-down's a beat-down.



Let me announce you.



Y'all, look who fell

into the gig!



l got to go.

Make yourself at home.



Put my stuff in its spot.



You got it.



What's up?



What up?



What up, B? How you livin'?






Cover the labels.

Niggers can't bite your shit.



That's smooth.

You brought the mike?



Yeah, but look, man,

it's for Play.



lt's his party.

Only he can rap.



That mumble-mouth motherfucker?



l'm the one

with the dope lyrics.



l got to go

for mine tonight.



Fuck that.

Get my lyrics together.






Work, Sharane!



Where you at?



Go, girl!



Chill, don't bump the table.

l appreciate it.



Play something l can dance to,

and l won't.



Don't bump the table.

l'm tryin' to mix.



You call that mixin'?

l just helped you out.



Thank you!



Next time l'm just

gonna fuck him up.



What the...



What the hell's going on here?



Shut up all that damn noise!

This ain't "Soul Train"!



Where's Don Cornelius

with his stiff neck?



You shut up all that damn noise.



l paid $      for this house.



Who else is over there,

Public Enema?



What's his name?



What the hell

is a public enema anyway?






Brother, you by yourself.

What's wrong?



Maybe that

big water head you got.



Shut up all this damn noise!



Hey, baby.



You have got some nice ones.



Baby, shut up.

l'm just playing with the kids.



You should find out

what she eatin'.



Y'all shut the hell up

down there!



l got something for you.



You stay right there.

Ain't this a bitch?



What are you doing?



-Callin' the police.

-For what?



They're driving me crazy

with this damn noise.



You makin' all the noise.



l got the wrong number,

too, baby.



Hold on one second.



Dance now with your big ass.






l'll hold.






Sharane, man.

That girl is Nubian.



She's the finest girl in here.



That ain't hard in here,

but still...



l'm getting those digits.



Don't play yourself.

You ain't got no rap.



She don't know that.



Sweet daddy!



Why you cock-blockin' me?



lt ain't like that.

We go way back.



l used to go with her

in third grade.



-l don't remember that.

-For three days.



Why you trippin'?



Just make sure we don't trip

on the dance floor.



Why these cops

keep sweatin' us, man?



They always fuckin' with us.



They're gone, man.






Look at us, fellas.



This is not right.

We're nervous and tense.



Cop cars follow us,

and we just go to pieces.



-This ain't us!

-This ain't the way.



l know there's a reason

behind all this.



And l know what the reason is.



All because of some faggot,





punk motherfucker named Kid.



That's who l mean!



Ever since this fool

came into my life...



l can't do nothin'

but see him, man.



l'll be alone with

my woman sometimes...



damn near ready

to wax that ass...



and all l can do

is vision this fool.







l don't know about that.



l know when it comes

to my dick action...



all l can think about

is the pussy.



He must have a mental block

or something.



Pee-Wee, you know what l mean.



-l was jokin'.

-l'll drop you like a bad cold.



Why don't you chill

the fuck out?



l'm gonna put a serious

bum-rush into effect...



and we in the house.



l get it.

We'll be housin' the party.



We'll make it

like a real house party.



-We be housin' shit.





l spent $      on my house.



l don't want no goddamn

Public Enema around here.



Yes, sir.



Shut up, old man!



Your asses are old.

Mr. So-and-so'll be right over.



Just hold on one second.



    . Come on over, God damn it!



What you mean,

don't curse at you?



You're cursin' at me!

Fuck you, too!



All that goddamn noise.



You wouldn't believe the skirt

this girl has got on.



lt's two inches above the thing.






Hi. Let's do this, girl.



The time is...



l'm sorry.

l just finished dancing.



Why girls be gettin' tired

real quick?



lt's hot in here.

My hair is through.



Put some use

to them corns on your feet.



Maybe later, OK?



You done turned down

thirty brothers.



Don't make me walk

all the way back there...



after climbing from

around the D.J. table...



crossing the room,

obviously to ask you to dance.



l'll be the object of ridicule.



There's a lot of girls

not dancing.



Want to know why?

Because they are homely.



They need to be home

getting beauty sleep.



What you think

they say about you?



You heard something?



Oh, no. Sharane!



Kid, what's up?



-You enjoying yourself?




l've known you too long.



What's that look in your eye?

Scheming on Sidney or Sharane?



Actually, l had my eye--



Sidney's for you.

Sharane wants me.



-She does?

-Every day.



Besides, with your father...



you can't deal

with no project girl.



You gonna ill out on a girl

from the projects?



You got it wrong.



With a father like yours,

you have no privacy...



no car, and no money

for a motel.



You see my point?



With a project girl,

someone's always home...



and that's gonna mess

with your datin' time.



Mating time.

Know what l'm saying?



How's it look watching

television with Uncle Fester?



-lt's Uncle Otis.




But Sidney has a home.



A house with a rec room.



You know what time it is.

Go downstairs.



Sofa bed. You're in.



-Why you playin' me?

-l'm not--



Just 'cause you don't have

nice stuff at your crib...



don't mess with my mother's.



Your liver gonna

shrivel up like a prune.



lt's hot.



Become a man, come on.

Some of this.



No, man. You better

slow down yourself.



That monkey oil

is gonna mess you up good.



l tried to tell him.



Kid, you my man...



but l tell you

you'll be out on the sauce...



if you're not down with this.



This stuff makes your dick hard.



l'm talking cock-diesel, baby.



Do that dance step

you was doin' out there.



l've been trying to get

that all night.



-l don't feel like it.

-Come on!



l'm really not in the mood.



Don't do it, then.

l'll learn on my own.



Wait a minute.

Don't give up so easy.



l knew you wouldn't

go out on me.



l'll teach you.



Cool, man.



This is very complicated.



-What are you doing?

-This ain't aerobics class.



You can't do it.



-ls that a challenge?

-lt is.



-You better come on out here.

-Come on.



And look, drunk.



-Shall we do this?

-Let's do it.



Don't be movin' me.



They went to

the Rerun dance school.



Go ahead. What you got?












Bilal, switch again!



Come on, man, switch!



Did you see how Kid

was all up on me?



On you?



He was so far up on me,

l could not move.



Wait a minute.

You said he was young-actin'.



l did. l also said he was cute.






l do everything l can for him,

and he don't come home.



He must be crazy.



He don't pay no bills

around this house.



l'll give him another minute,

and that's it.



What's wrong with this watch?



Minute don't take

that damn long.



Shit. l know where he's at.



l'll kill him when l see him.



l should have never married

that white woman.



Hold it right there.






Where are you going?



l'm minding my fuckin' business.



Do you have a problem with that?



Again with the questions.



What is this, "Jeopardy"?



lt ain't "Jeopardy,"

or Monopoly, either...



and l ain't going to jail.




-God damn.



Y'all sound like

a set of bookends.



Put your hands

on top of your head.



Lean back.



l know why you stopped me.



'Cause l'm a poor black man

in a black neighborhood...



and y'all just want

to bust my black ass.




-You look suspicious.



Ain't that a bitch?



You look suspicious

and definitely black.



Turn around.



Your wife likes it.



We're responding to a    

in the neighborhood.



You could be coming

from that disturbance.



The only fuckin' disturbance

is you fuckin' with me.



Don't think l can't read

no badge numbers, chump.



Boyd and Warnarski.

l'll turn your ass in.



That's enough, OK?



Watch your attitude, pal.



-Ain't that a bitch?

-Go home.



Fuck you.

Officers of the goddamn law.




-l'm not ready.



Go on home, pal.



You don't know

who you fucking with.



l'm from a small town called

"Fresh Off A Cop's Ass."



You make me homesick.



l'll find that damn boy.

Head like a whisk broom.



Sharane and Sidney,

the two finest women in here.



How could a man choose?



He better choose right.



lt's like that?



Sharane, you are crazy.



l really like that outfit

you got on.



lt likes you, too.



-And you got the boots.

-You like my boots?



Look at your hair.

lt looks so nice.



You got the braid

and everything.



That's my jam !



Check out this mix, boy.



Yo, Sharane.






Yo, baby.



Let's do it, darling.



Want to dance, baby?






-Like to dance?




You sure

you don't want to dance?



l'm quite sure.



Can l sit down?



lt's a free country.



When l saw you

turn that other guy down...



l knew that the odds

were against me.



Don't take it personal.



l didn't take it personal

when you asked me after Sharane.



What's your middle name?






Sidney. That's a nice name.



You sure

you don't want to dance?



l'm still tired. My feet.



Your feet.



Your mother should

buy you a bigger shoe size.



That would help.



That outfit you got on

is really nice.



-Pierre Cardin?




l knew it wasn't Pierre Cardin.



All right, fellas,

it's time to go to work.



You sure you don't want

to dance?



Maybe on a fast song.



l'm really not into slow songs.




-You want to dance?



Can't you see

l'm talking to my girl?



l should have sat out

the last one like you did.



l'm about to die.



-Ready to go yet?

-What's wrong?



You can't go until

you give me what you owe me.




-Just a dance.



lt's late. We're ready to go.



Let's just dance right now.



l usually don't dance

on slow records...



but l will

if you won't grind on me.



Come on.



Don't be feelin' on my butt.



You so soft and comfy,

like my Hush Puppies.



You so warm and fluffy

like a buttermilk biscuit.






You make me want to squeeze

tighter and tighter.



l ain't gonna lie.



You make a motherfucker

want to sing.



Always and forever



Each moment with you



ls just like

a dream to me and you



That somehow came true



Honeys. Oh, yes.



Yo, fellas!



lt's cool.



What's the problem?



No problem.

No hoods allowed at my party.




-That's right.



Why don't y'all

go rob a liquor store?



Why don't you quit playin'?



lf l'd known you were coming,

l'd have had metal detectors.



-That shit is real funny.

-Real funny.



Don't touch my body, man.



Big man. Don't touch his body.



Look at that.

Bunch of punk motherfuckers.



You smell something?



l definitely smell

something out here.



l smell pussies!



Forget this, man.



Forget all these chumps.



We would smell like pussies

to a bunch of dicks!






lt's cool. Forget this, man.



l don't want to hang out

with this sucker set.



What l'd like to do

is hurt that punk Kid.



lf you was a real man,

you'd come out here...



and we'd squash this!



That's right, punk!



Get him when he's alone.

l told you.



Too many people around, man.



l'd really love to come

out and play with you...



but l'm busy right now

with your girl on my lap.






Your shoulder OK?



Fuck this, man.



We can't let them

get away with that.



See what happened?



We ought to go back

and kick some ass.



We just got dissed

by some punk motherfuckers?



We got dissed

by some motherfuckers.



ln front of their girls.



l ain't goin' out like that.




Finally, a program l'm with.



Whatever this is, l'm with it.



l hear that.



We bust their ass as they

run out of the burning house.



Let's get moving.



Burning house?



Hold up for a second.



l was talking about

kicking some ass...



not burning people up.



Now you're going too far.



Y'all frontin' on me?



Wait. Do l smell pussy?



l ain't no pussy.



Shut up! Squash that!

Come on!



What's wrong with him?



Come on!



What's the matter with you?



Why you want to burn people up?



Come on, come on.



What's up with the mike?



Easy! Thank you.



Play and Kid got an urge...



to make a fool

of themselves in public.



Hey, wait a minute, baby.



Let me show you how

to hold a piece of steel.



-Scared of you.

-You should be.



-Go on.

-l will.



One, two. One, two.



Give me a little volume

on this microphone.



Let's get this party jumping.



All the ladies, all the ladies



All the ladies

in the house say ow



Say ow



Come on, come on



Homeboys, make some noise



l said, homeboys,

make some noise



Let me hear you say ho



Say ho, ho



The roof, the roof



Y'all like that

old prehistoric stuff?



We don't need no water



Let the motherfucker burn



-Say what?

-Burn, motherfucker!



l don't believe this.



Didn't the Sugarhill Gang

do that rap?



The roof is on fire



We don't need no water



Let the motherfucker burn



Who got a light?



How about a Bud Light?




-Get in there.






Fuck you toy cops, man.



-Don't call it in.

-Why not?



Why bother with the paperwork?

We can handle this shit.



What do you got in mind?



Let's take them

down to the docks.



Nobody can hear them scream.






lt's the P-L-A-Y



Just here to say hi



Asking you may l

tell you about the day l



Picked up a microphone,

a pad, and a pen?



The legend

of the champ begins



The party host with the most



Giving you a dose, see?



Leaving instructions,

so listen closely



Two lines forming



Make sure you step soon



Fellas at the back door,

girls by the bedroom



The name is Play,

don't dare play me cheap



The microphone is a broom



And l'm going

to sweep you off your feet



With feelings

that you never felt



Another notch in the belt



lt's no secret



l like to freak

with the best of them



Then head to the stage

in a test of men



And when it's done and said

and said and done



Play's gonna be

the victorious one



Dope, ain't it?

l know.



-Give me that mike.

-You want some?



lt's my turn.



l'm never 'fessin',

possessin' the tools



That it takes to rock



l think it's time

for the new kid on the block



With a style that's wild,

yet so unique



l can't be stopped

from reachin' my peak



Because givin' my all,

that's how l got to live



lt's my prerogative,

so you know l gotta give



More for the dance floor,

and l'll make your brain sore



Kid's revvin' and buzzin'

just like a chain saw



One look, you'll say, damn, man,

that Kid needs a grand, man



'Cause l bust a handstand

on "American Bandstand"



With ease, l please

and make your mind freeze



Straight out the Eighties,

right into the Nineties



Givin' you the highs

and lows like a drama



And if the mike's got juice,

you know, l'm a-keep wailin'



You know l'll have you

starin' a while



Because the Kid's much more

than hair and a smile



There it is, the hype shit.



You think you all that now?



Yup. And then some.



Bust it.



lt's my party,

and l rhyme if l want to



Be careful and don't you

step to the front to



Dis, 'cause l'm gonna

dismiss with a def kiss



And make you sorry that

you ever stepped to this



Microphone wizard,

so come on, place your bet



ls it gonna be me or Eraserhead?



Why put your money

on a sorry old poor thing



When you can get behind

a sure thing?



And that's me, the capital "P"

on the hype tip



One false move, and you'll

get your ass whipped



Just tell me how the rhymes

and the cuts sound



You won't start feelin' the pain

till you touch ground



Boy, you goin' way out,

l'm ready to serve you



lf you can stay out

past your Pop's curfew



Look at him,

already a has-been



Let Uncle Play say a rhyme

that'll tuck your ass in



Am l paid or what?



You some kind of foul,

you know what l'm saying?



Once again, the boy blows smoke

about what he want to be



But it isn't and wasn't,

and it ain't never gonna be




'cause l got lots of pull



And when you rhyme,

whoo, there's lots of bull



When it comes time

to step to a mike



l don't sit around



Play, you know

l don't kid around



So come with it, boy,

don't even hide your best



'Cause Kid spelled backwards

describes you best



Look around, watch the people

clap hands in unity



As the momentum

swings from you to me



You issued a challenge,

yeah, you threw it up



Step to the stage,

too late, l blew it up



The knowledge to build,

just filled with excellence



You heard the rhymes,

you've been petro ever since



There's no missin'

the words that l laid out



You didn't play,

you just got played out



Anything y'all could do,

l also could do...



but l could also do it better.



What the...



Oh, baby.

The police been here...



and they still

down there dancing.



Come back to bed, Harry.






What's up? Enjoying yourselves?



Damn, Groove...



why you got to play

the alky role at my party?



Man, l told you

to go way over there.



You bump this table again...



l'm going to kick

your fucking heart out.



l've been looking

all over for you.



Help me haul this fool home.



You're doing a great job.



Why you hang out

with that sucker?



That ain't important.

This is.



Would you help me

haul this fool home?



l told you don't invite him.



Groove! Get up, man.



Let me go, man.



The turf! Excuse me!



Watch your back!

Groove might throw up!



We're ready to go home.

Want to come?



OK. My pops wants me home

by   :   anyway.



-  :  ?

-Not   :  .



  :     :  .



Did you see where Play went?



l saw Chill and Play

carrying Groove home.



He promised us a ride home.



l don't mind walking you home.



lt's not as good

as a ride, but...



Cool. l think Sidney's

ready to leave anyway.



Kid said he'll walk us home.



We'll go get his coat

and your purse.



Aren't you going

to wait for Play?



Don't be up there all night.



Kids got it easy nowadays.



My father said,

"Stay your ass at home..."



you stayed your ass at home.



Wait till l find him.

l'm going to kill him !



You're drunk as a fish.



Come tomorrow,

you the first one in church.



Who said something about church?



l see the light



l see the light



l don't want to see nobody.

Let's go.



James, is that you?



-My boy here?

-No, sir. Who's he?



You know who he is.



-He in here?




You ought to be ashamed,

messin' up these folks' house.



Know it ain't paid for.



Y'all in here doing some wrong!



Bilal--whatever your name is.



Sounds like something

you catch on your feet.



You seen my boy?



l haven't seen him, sir.



You sure?

You ain't seen him?



Why don't you go home

and watch the late show, Pops?



Why don't you go home,

little test-tube baby?



-What's your name?




-Clinton what?

-Clinton X.



Clinton X?



Yeah, Clinton x.

l'm a Muslim.



Get me two bean pies

and a pork chop sandwich...



you little

trout-mouthed heathen.



Oh, how you doing?



l should've known you was here.

Saw the drippings outside.



With your Jheri-Curl,

better never do a crime.



The police would have

no problem finding you.



Follow the drip.



No problem finding you.



Bilal, where's the boy at?




ls the boy upstairs?






Play told me to make sure

nobody went upstairs...



'cause his parents

just got new carpet.



And he don't want nobody

with shit on their shoes--



-Did l say "shit"?

-You did.



You talking about my shoes?



No. Nobody can

walk around up there.



l understand.

So nobody been up there?



Ain't nobody up there.

l don't play.



l don't play, either.



l ain't got time to play games

with you damn kids.



He got to come home sometime.



l'll be waiting

on his monkey ass.



Get out of the damn way.



l'll be like a security guard,

waiting for him.



Get out of my way.






Just make yourself at home.



What's Play's mama

doing with this dress?



She ought to give this to me.



lt does look kind of nice.



Let me help you

with that dress, huh?



What do you think?



Hold. What you doing?



Helping you with the dress.



You got to take things

slow at first.



-Kid, your--




Nothing. l just came

to get my pocketbook.



We was about to get it.



And now we're not.



Now l know

it's time for us to go.



Let's go out the back way.



l told Play l'd help clean up.

l don't want to run into him.



You'd run into a lot more

than Play out front.



What are you doing on Friday?



l don't know.

Why don't you call me tomorrow?



A lot of guys get nervous

in the projects.



Why would they be punks

like that?



After Mr. Williams' son started

sniping people from the roof...



guys drop me off on the corner

and tell me to call them.



l shouldn't make plans

for this weekend.



lt depends if my father

lets me off punishment...



for getting into

that fight at school.



Friday may not be

good for me, either.



We'll talk tomorrow in school.



-Come on, now.

-Don't beg.






Good night.



l'll be back.



Do l detect jealousy?



Why tease him?

"Let's get together Friday."



Didn't you say

the same shit to Play?



One's in trouble,

the other one's available.



l'm just playing averages.



They're friends!



Cute ones always travel

in packs.



But why is old ugly Bilal

with his breath...



hanging out with them?



l can't believe

you're acting like this.






Let me tell you something.

Life is short.



lf you want something,

let the chips fall.



You're mad because

you didn't catch one.



That may not be by accident.



You didn't like him

till he was up on me.



That is bullshit.

He was up on me first.



Why you think

l didn't talk to him...



even though l knew

you were playing him?



Then you put him

all up in my face.



l'm out of here.

l don't want to hear it.



He's still got

to walk you home, right?



lf you think l'm dogging him,

try and take him.



-l ain't like you.

-That's why you're mad.




-l heard you.



What's wrong?



You don't have to walk me home.



-l don't mind.

-l kind of do mind.



You beefed at me all night.

What did l do to you?



You didn't do anything.



lt's just l want to be alone.



l don't think

that's a good idea...



so l'm going to bug you

all the way home.



You should be

heading home yourself.



Why? l'm already in trouble.



Might as well have fun now

and suffer later.



l can only die once.



Yeah, but punishments

are forever.



That's true.



One time my father put me

on punishment for a month...



because l came home late

from a party.



l still get depressed

thinking about that.



Think about it

when the time comes.



My pops is cool,

but he's too overprotective.



l heard about your mom's

passing. l'm sorry.



Yeah. That was a while ago.



What do your folks do?



My dad owns

a couple of grocery stores.



l know y'all

been snacking down.



Crazy chips and dips.



My mom works in a bank

in bookkeeping.



At least you got a job

when you graduate.



But l'm going to college.



So am l.



l already started checking out

the applications.



Really? Aren't those

applications confusing?




those lvy League schools.



l ain't getting

all that far yet...



lvy League

or nothing like that.



What's up, fellas?



You didn't take all the women

while we were gone?



-A few.




-Someone is living foul.

-This nigger here.



Take care of that, please.



Did y'all two watch

the stuff like l asked?



Because if a brother

like Play get vict...



l'll have to do

some body and fender work.



There was some niggers

clocking your shit.



Was they clocking it as hard

as you should be clocking...



them bugs dropping

out of your hair?



Nigger got hair like Bob.



-Bob who?

-Bob Wire, motherfucker.



Real funny, man.



You're crazy.



Who broke the toilet?



l don't know.



Don't play me like this.

Who broke the toilet?



lt was like that

when l came in here, wasn't it?



Bet it was that nigger

in the leather jacket.



-He could shit some bricks.

-Neck like Mike Tyson.



"Play, when's your next party?"



l put you in my house,

and you dog me.



Look at the log

in that motherfucker.



l got to do something

before my mother gets back.



l'd help you, man,

but l got my new kicks on.



See the next time

l throw a party!



l'm sorry, man.



l'm out of here.



Y'all out of here?

l got a better idea.



Bust it. Party's over.






Don't say nothing to me, man.



When you see me in the streets,

don't say nothing.



l ain't no plumber.






l didn't even piss.



-That's cold.

-Just step.



-Peace, man.







Hold up, OK?



Good. l beat them home.



You girls scheme on a level

guys don't have a clue about.



l'm glad you let me

walk you home.



You're all right.



You pretty chill your damn self.



Did you kiss her?



Did l kiss who?



Tonight. Did you kiss Sharane?



No, l didn't.



But you wanted to.






But l didn't.



And l didn't know her

the way l know you now.



OK, so l'll see you later,

all right?






l would let you in

and everything, but...



it's late,

and you got to get home...



and my parents

will be here any minute.



l understand completely.



lt's not a problem.



Kid, wait.






What are we doing here?



We were doing fine

until you stopped me.



A few minutes ago...



you were trying to make

a date with my best friend.



This isn't right.



lt's not right?



l'll tell you what's not right--



the way you keep fronting on me.



So all you want is sex,

even from best friends?



l ain't forcing you

to do nothing.



lf you want me to leave, fine.



No problem.



Wait, wait, wait.

Sidney, wait up.



What is it you're asking me?



l'm not asking for anything.

lt's about what you want.



This is a trick question, right?



l ain't going to lie.



l'm attracted to both of you...



but if l have

to make a choice...



and that seems to be

what you're asking--



then you're

who l want as a friend.



lf you go with someone...



you should be friends

as well as lovers.



So now that we're friends...



let's get with the loving.



You think you slick, huh?



Now l have a question for you.






Are you on the pill?



No. l don't do this regular.



What about

one of those diagrams?



That's diaphragm,

and l don't do sponges, either.



Don't you have a whatchamacallit

in your wallet?



l knew this would come in handy.



lt's been in here a while.



Still good.



All right.



l guess it's been in here

a little too long.



So, now what?



Have you ever...



No, l never, no.



l don't know why l asked that.



l don't even know why

l asked about birth control.



Most guys wouldn't care

if you had it or not.



That's why l like you.

There'll be other times.



lt'll probably be

a long time from now.



Sorry, Kid.



That's what they call me.

"Sorry Kid."



That's not what l call you.



Get out of the way!



What are you doing?



l'm supposed to be

in my bedclothes.



l don't know

whether to watch or run.



Hurry up.



l don't know how those hoodlums

got into the party.



You should've pressed charges.



Not with those

fascist cops there.



lf l'd met that hoodlum

in the street, man to boy...



l'd punch him

in his snot locker.



You know l don't like

to be sucker-punched.



You've tried it

a couple of times.



What are you doing?

Are you crazy?



-How am l supposed to get out?

-Back door!






Sidney, you're awake.



l decided to stay home

after all.



That's my little baby.



Our little pumpkin

stayed home all by herself.



-ls that Princess?

-l'll see.



lt's probably nothing.

See? lt stopped.



l'm sleepy.

l'm going to go to bed now.



My back!



Those cops are always

fucking with--



My stomach.



Shut up.

He hit us all the same way.



l'm tired of gettin'

beat by punk cops, man.




how does your ribs feel?



They fucked me up the same way

they fucked you up.



Yo, look!



Oh, yeah.



After gettin'

beat down by them cops...



l'm ready to whip

somebody's ass.



Where you goin', longhair?

Come here!



Let "Hey Love..."



Oh, my God!



The classic sounds of sexy soul.



Look at my hand again,

you'll be like that man...



Get some chicken, baby!



There goes

that broomhead albino!



Get that motherfucker now!

Get him now!



Get him ! Come on!



Fuckin' rat!



Get off me, man!



Oh, shit!



Come on.



What happened to homey's shoe?






Aw, shit! Shit!



Who's gonna explain that?



What the fuck you lookin' at?



So this is how you got

that Buckwheat fade.



You stick your head

in the icebox, right?



l hear you're a rapper.



l got a rap for your ass.



You run around town

like a faggot in heat



Me and my boys can't be beat



Wherever you go,

we can smell you like gas



And we're gonna kick

your fuckin' ass



You got your silly ass

locked in the icebox



With nowhere to go



What we should really do

is take this refrigerator...



and just dump that shit

in the river.



You ain't thinkin'.

Where's your head at?



Leave me the fuck alone.



Freeze, Negroes.



Hey, let me out!



This is your lucky day.



lt was a jammin' party.



There you go, there you go.



-l got to talk to you.

-Tell me tomorrow.



l'm sorry, Ev.



The brothers

keep fucking with me.



You were real cool with me.

Always remember that.



But Kid's dad--



What the hell happened to Kid?

He was supposed to help.



l thought he was down.



Peace out.



Yo, move over, man.



Move! Move!



We've been

going at this all day...



since earlier in the lunchroom.



lt hasn't gotten us

anywhere but in here...



which is where

we don't want to be.



Why don't we let

bygones be bygones...



and work together

to get out of here?



What do you say?



Man, fuck you.



Looks like l'm in here

for a couple of more days.



So how's everything

out on the street?



You taking care of my business?



What the--



l know the party's not over yet.



Think so?



That was wrong.



Play in full effect.

What up?



Play, this is Kid.

l'm in prison.



Right, at your house.



No, l'm not at home.

l'm in jail for real.



l need you to bail me out.

Anybody there to borrow from?



Just Bilal,

packing up his equipment.



Brothers ain't got no money.



Hurry, man.

My back's against the wall.



Just give me a minute.

We'll be right there.



Just do me a favor.

Don't pick up the soap.



Like l need you to tell me that.



That's why you can't

be on C.P.T.



l need you

on Japanese people time.



l'm depending on you.

Are you gonna come down?



-All right.

-l'm serious.



All right!



All right, bye.



-How much we got?




How much do we have?



Don't holler at me, man.

l'm telling you.



Think they'll take a check?



Shit. l got to collect

from the bums at my party.



Think they'll give you money

after you kicked them out?



lt's the least they can do

after breaking my toilet.



How about the girls

who left earlier with Kid?



Boy, are you crazy?



Kid's in jail.

We need your help.







l should get in trouble

'cause he did?



He didn't do nothing wrong.



We're his friends.

All we need is bail money.



Bail money? He got a daddy.



His daddy'll kick his ass.



Should've thought of that

before he did what he did.



He is my boy and all, but damn.






Why you try and leave me?



l saw you running like hell.



No sense of both of us

getting our asses kicked.



Man, that's fucked up.



-Did you get the money?

-No. She trippin'.



That's the problem when l send

a boy to do a man's job.



A boy?

Think you can do any better?



Look, nigger, l--Hi, Play.



Hi. l know you ain't in bed.



The party ain't over yet.



After we go get Kid,

we're going to Burger King.



Burger King?



A little bite to eat.

Hang out a little while.



lt's kind of late.



Come on, for me.



Wait out front.



Don't forget your purse.



Hey, Daisy.



Heard you got quite

a reputation at your school.



Sweetest meat around.



When we get finished,

you gonna be even sweeter.



Know what this man did?

Tell him, Hatchett.



l cut a man's heart out.



Check that out.



Tell him what you did, Rock.



l beat a police sergeant,

with his own club.



And didn't run after he did it.



Hell, no.



What did you do?



l used to run

a day-care center.



l called Sidney.

She wants to come with us.



l told her we'd pick her up.



You got a couple of girlfriends

l can meet?



Has anybody ever told you

your breath stinks?






-Fuck you!




You heard. Fuck you!



You mad 'cause

you still a virgin.



l ain't no virgin.

l got a girlfriend.



She just don't live

around here, right?






Hey, don't hit me.



You got dragon-breath.



Your shit is a little tart, too.



Nigger, please.




-Shut up.



That's what l thought.



l got something to tell you.



-You got juice?




Tell me.



This l know.



l don't believe you.






That's right. So don't get mad.



l ain't trippin'.



You go, girl.



Thank you, girl.



Did l tell you how good

you looked in that suit?



Don't worry.

Won't take but a minute.



Depending on who's in it.



ls there anything

l can do to stop this?



Richard Pryor said

when he was in prison...



he kept folks laughing to keep

their minds off his booty.



Do you know any jokes?



No, l don't know any jokes.



You better think of something.



What if l can't

think of anything?



The light's out,

the party's over...



the cake's on the griddle,

and you already greased.



All right,

you're first, my man.



Let's go.



All right. Let's go.



Come on.



Excuse me, everybody.



Won't you gather around?

l got something to say.



Who is this clown?



Just a guy who looks

at things differently



The way things are

aren't how they're meant to be



With the big men

here in the bullpen



l don't want my knees

to take a full bend



Step back, ask yourself,

can it wait?



Or do you want to become

an AlDS candidate?



Take your eyes off me,

don't even watch the Kid



Or you'll go out

like Liberace did



ln my own cell

l could've been alone



Why do you all want me?

l'm only skin and bones



l'm feeling faint,

it's kind of hot



My, what big muscles you got



Hoo, lips don't fail me now



Until Play comes to bail me out



What's going on there?



Man, this is too much,

look but don't touch



l'm just trying

to avoid the bum rush



Thought l was in here

with murderers and stranglers



You guys are a bunch

of rump wranglers



And why me?

Look, l'm not the only male



We gonna tie that fade

into a ponytail



Yo, this is a no-go,

l'm gonna call the C.O.



Me a homo?

Nah, man, that's a no-no



But if you back off now,

that might save you time



Off your sentence

for good behavior



l'm speaking from the heart,

from the center



The sign on my ass

says "Do Not Enter"



l'm a rapper, l rock rhymes,

so l'm gonna bust one



l see y'all wanna rock,

like Hudson



Just an example,

l chill 'em and thrill 'em



Where is Play?

l'm gonna kill him




you hit the right note.



You just made bail.



Ha, hey, fellas, fellas



Ha ha, l gotta go,

all right?



Don't feel bad, all right?



Hey, no long faces, ha ha



Think of all the fun we had



l want to thank y'all

for making me feel welcome



lt really, really

did the trick, all right?



Oh, uh, by the way



Suck my dick



l'll kick your fuckin' ass!






With that motivation,

you could have rapped all night.



l'm glad y'all came

through for me finally.



Would l let a homeboy down?



So, you want

to go out next week?







-Call me.

-l will.



l don't get a kiss?



A hug? Some form of affection?



Come on, stop playing.



Any lipstick on me? Yes!



l knew it. Smooth operator.



Bye, Sidney.



Don't slob too loud.

You'll wake the neighbors up.



l'll see you later.



This has been your night, boy!



Cannot front. You are the dude.



That must have been

one hell of a walk home.



Give me

a play-by-play description.



What color were the panties?



We got into it,

but then we didn't--



She was on her period?



No, she wasn't on her period.



What's up?



l didn't have any rubbers.



Hold up. She was down.



Play knows these things.

She was down.



And you was down,

and you didn't...



'cause you didn't

have birth control?



Let me explain--



We're talking

about fine Sidney here.



Good hair.



Def body!



That's who

we're talking about.



ls that all you're into?

"Good hair. Def body."



What are you talking about?

l look at the face, too.



That's fucked.



l'm not about

having babies right now.



That's her problem.



You the man.



She takes care of that

or pays the price.



-How can you say that?

-You're naive.



You're a fuckin' dog,

and you, too, Rover.



Yeah, l'm a dog.



You sound like your pops.



A guy your age

shouldn't sound like your pops.



You've got a problem.



Yo, Kid.

Chill for a minute.



lt's still early,

l got the crib...



and you won't believe

what's on the Late Show.



"Krush Groove"

and "Beat Street."



Shit, let's go to your house now

and watch it.



l really would like

to see the movie...



but it's really late, man.



Tape it,

and we'll watch it tomorrow.



Peace out.



-Peace, boy.




You know what l love

was "Breakin'."



l wonder when

that shit's coming on.



l wouldn't do that just yet...



'cause your ass is mine.



Pop, l can explain.



l'm gonna whup that damn

high-top fade off of you!



l'm sick of your shit!



l work too hard and too long

to let you run over me...



like you outta your damn mind.



l walked across

this damn city...



got stopped by

the goddamn law...



lookin' for your monkey ass.



All you kids over there

just slow-dancing...



doing the grind,

and the peepin' and the hidin'.



l know your ass.

You was there, wasn't you?



l run the show here.



l wear the pants and the apron,

and l'll wear your ass out!



l'm gonna whup you

till l'm sleepy.



And l'm wide awoke

'cause l just woke up.



You think because

you're big and yellow...



l'm supposed to be mellow.

Hell, no!



l'll start a fight

in an empty room !



You can call Child Abuse

if you want to!



They better not come in here,

'cause l'll kick their ass, too.



l'm gonna give you

a whuppin' from now on.



l'll whup the cowboy shit

out from you.



Gee, Pop.



Now get your ass to bed!



And don't wake up

till l tell you to!



l didn't mean it.



l didn't know they were

the rest of the cookies.



My grandma's    years old.



l don't know how many years

she's got left to make cookies.



You didn't have to finish

the rest of them.



l don't know how many years

l've got left in my grandmother.



They were good, though.



Look at that.


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