Voila! Finally, the Johnny Suede
script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Brad Pitt movie. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly
transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Johnny Suede. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally
tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to
drop me a line. You won't
hurt my feelings. Honest.
"Some people call me a teenage idol
Some people say they envy me..."
Some time near the end of the XXth century, in the depths of a large American city...
...there lived a young man named John Beaman. No one knew where he came from really...
...or where he was going. But it was clear, at least to him, he was going somewhere.
John had just about everything: the look, the hair, the clothes... everything...
except one thing... shoes.
And this made him feel incomplete. As if he lacked one final crucial thing.
Like a car without wheels, like a rocket without fuel...
...like a man without shoes. Everyone else seemed to have it, everyone else seemed complete.
Everyone except him. So he kept looking for this one thing.
Night after night... Wandering... searching...
This is the story of what happened when he found it.
- Hey, man! - What!?
- Come in! - Why!?
- Come and get the stuff! It is good. I'm telling you!
- What's wrong with her? - She's all right. She's digging it, man!
- Hey, baby! - See that, man?
- She wants it, man! Come on over here!
- Yes? Police. - Something funny going on...
..on the corner of Lincoln and the .
"Some people call me a teenage idol. Some people say...
they envy me. I guess they got no way of knowing how lonesome I can be.
I need somebody to be my baby Someone to tell my troubles to
I've got no time to ever find her Cause I'm just passing through.
I travel around from town to lonely town.
I guess I'll always be just a rolling stone...
If I find fortune and fame and lots of people know my name...
That won't mean a thing if I'm all alone..."
- Suede is a funny thing.
It's rough, but soft... Is strong, but quiet...
It doesn't wrinkle and it doesn't crack...
And it doesn't stand up so much in the crowd of the leather...
You don't notice it at first but once you do you can't take your eyes of...
and you wonder how the hell could you overlook it in the first place?
- Who is it? - It's your father!
- Hi, Mr. Clepp. How you doing?
- I'm not bothering you? - No, I've just practiced on my guitar and stuff...
Know, I wrote a song once...
It's called "The Rent Song". Did you ever heard "The Rent Song"?
"The Rent song"? No, I don't think so.
It goes like this: hey, hey, today is the day those that pay will get to stay.
Those that don't, I hate to say, they got to pack the shit...
..and move, move away...
Practise that, Caruso.
- Hey, Johnny!
I'm sorry I missed you last night I was on the way to club but it's three girls...
pull up to me, asking me to take them to the tunel...
The next thing I know, they're going through the tunnel...
..with me still in the car. Ain't that.. they've parked in the woods. Ain't that interesting...?
So how about you, you scored last night? - What the fuck was I doing, man? Playing hockey?
- Jesus, what's the matter with you? - What's the matter with me!? I just pawned my guitar, that's what.
- Why!? - So I have something else to eat besides...
goddamned cabbage! I tell you, if I had a gun, right now...
- I'd do something! - Like what!?
- Like what? See that barber's shop over there? I bet there's dollars in the register. We walk in...
..show him the gun and he gives us the cash, right?
- Yeah... Hey, that's not a bad idea, Johnny! - I know! I can get my guitar back!
- I can get me a new keyboard! - I would to start the band!
- So when are we gonna get the band started? - I just told you, as soon as we get a gun.
Listen! I know the guy, he is a apartment painter. So like you help me, I split with you / ?
- / ?
No. These hands weren't made to hold a goddamned paintbrush!
- All right, you know what's the case! - I do.
- All right, see you later tonight in the club! - No, I'm not going.
Hey man! Come on, come about sooner or later.
Johnny? Johnny Suede?
- Freak! - Slick.
- We need to talk... Really, we need to talk.
- I'd like to talk to you too, Slick, but not right now? - What do you man can't right now? When?
- I don't know, man. I'm totally booked! This record company (...) is on my ass to get this album out.
- I need my money. I mean I need my money!
- Yeah, well, I'm sure you do.
- You know with that shoehorn, you remind me of a prince in a faery-tale?
- Well, with this dress remind me of a strawberry ice cream!
- Looking for something? - Yeah, I just ordered a beer and now it's gone.
- I'll buy you one. May I have a beer, please! - Thanks.
- Are you with the band?
I knew it! They had a show last week.
- No, we can't play there yet. - You should. I know my mom's a...
- a records distibutor. - Really?
- Yeah, but ... because I write a poetry ..anyway I'd like to say that music and poetry...
- ...are alike - I've always thought so.
- What's the name of your band again?
- I'm not supposed to go to that club - Why not?
- It really upsets, my boyfriend.
- Who is Flip? - He is my boyfriend.
"Glooming darkness like constant shadows...
where'er I go to shores afar, a prince of dreams on horse of white...
please, bring me a blinding beams of light."
- God, that's beautiful! Listen, I'd better be going - Why?
- I don't feel right here with your boyfriend and all...
- Yeah, he is pretty jealous He'd get crazy if he finds you here.
- Is he coming over? - I hope not. I'm a little affraid of him.
- Why? - He hits me sometimes.
- Do you think maybe you could stay?
- What about her boyfriend? - She's gonna dump him.
But she's got to take it easy because the guy's got a temper.
You know, he hits her and shit, has black and bluemarks on. - Jesus!
- What's his kinda problem? - I don't know, he's just crazy I guess.
- He's famous photographer, Flip Doubt. - Flip Doubt?
- It's what she said. - What a fucking idiot, man!
- Yeah, and a fucking idiot lives right across the street.
- Too bad, Johnny! I mean now you've got to start sneaking around and shit, man.
- Are you finished? I don't sneak around, you know that. Come on. We worked out a schedule. He'll see her...
on Monsday, Wednesday and Friday and I will see her, on Tuesady, Thursday and Saturday. See?
- What about Sunday? - Well, she's leaving for herself(???), you know.
I was thinkng, if you loan me $ I get back my guitar and we will have rehearsal on Sunday.
- You're serious? - Said I'd start the band, that's what I'm gonna do!
- Yep. You got any songs? - No!
- No? You better get on it. I got a couple, but we got it, we got it going.
I didn't tell you the best part. Ready? Toile's mom...
works for the High Tone Record's producer!
- That's smooth Johnny! - But I'm not gonna push it...
- you know me, Mr. Easy-Going. - Just let it come to you, Johnny.
- Let it come to you. - You're so right. Like a little bird...
...a beautiful little bird.
Doing fine before I came on.
Well, Flip, got to say it, the game only started...
Don't you know...with an open end?
- Has anybody ever swept these stairs? - No, no since I've been here.
- This is for you.
- Oh! Wow!
They are really beautiful. - I should go now.
- Why!? You just got here! - I don't feel well.
- Are you sick? - No, I am not sick.
- Then what's the matter? - Flip slapped me again last night.
- What for!? - No reason.
- That's it. I'm gonna teach that fucking scum back about slapping women! I'm gonna kick the shit out of him!
- He's got a gun!
"This is for a never-girl. The girl I never knew... the one that I pledge to love...
I promised to be true.
The one who will never hurt me. Ear. That one that never...
I thought about kissing, pleasing...
And if I ever find her, I know just what I say.
What I will say. ...to take you far away."
Not bad! But why we just like gas a tempo, Johnny, like...
...it is right now, like: hey, hey...
"This is for a never-girl. The girl I never knew; The one who never... I promised to be true...
- I'll never, I'll never. I'l never..!!" - No! Hey!
- It's a lovesong, man - Yeah, I know it's a love song but it's, you know, it's sound is oldfashioned and we must have new, right? I mean, you know...
- No, wrong! You know I mean I'm not into it now! Now it's a...
voice fared in the wind...
I mean my music just comes out of me, anytime, anywhere
It's got no date on it!
- So you're in love, huh? - Why you said that? - You just said it's a love song.
- This song is not about me, man! I just made it up..
Yeah... let's take a break.
- Where did you get that plant? Darlette...
She's.. redoing my apartment, man for free..! whole thing..!
- That's nice! - Yea! And I guess she told old lady about me...
Now she wants to meet me.
- Yeah, yeah.. that's cool, you know.. but be careful, man this one thing I learned from experience, that..
if your girlfriend mother likes you, chances are...
- ..it's serious, ok? - Thanks, man. I gotta remember that.
- Who is this? - are you kidding?
Mick Nelson. Great voice, huh?
Yeah... some people say I sound like him.
- Is it something else you can play? - Sure is.
Don't you have anything else?
- You don't like it? - Well, it's boring...
Well, hey, I just take it off than..
- Jeremy Freak Storm! - Who?
- Freak Storm. He's great! Flip has his records.
- Never heard of him. ..said this plant didn't need much attention.
- Well have you been watering it?
- Of course I have been watering it! I think it was dead when you gave it to me.
- I wouoldn't give you a dead plant! - Does this plant look dead or not?!
- Where are you going?
- To grab a beer. - I will wait up the stairs until you come back...
- If you want...
- Where are you from, Johnny? - Oh no particular place, lady.
- I assume you were born somewhere? - Dakota. I only lived there a month.
Like a Rolling Stone. You know, with Dakota being primarily settled by Swedish emigrants
I'm wandering if the original pronunciation of your name isn't Swede. Ian Swede.
No, it's Suede, Mr. Fontaine. Always has been and always will be.
- Dalton is not Mr. Fontaine, Johnny. - Is not?
..I'm... I'm a friend, John. I'm ... friend.
- Where is your dad? - Gone.
- Gone? - Mr. Fountain disappeared shortly before Darlete's th birthday.
But a month later the divorce papers arrived post marked 'Buenos Aires'..
..and I haven't seen him ever since.
Well, he's probably living in a tree house somewhere surrounded by a bare breasted...
- See I was kind of a lone wolf my day - Oh yeah?
- Yeah. I randled wild, ...loved hard - Do you know what I say? - I do.
Oh, I know you do...
To the lonely wolf.
- What they are you toasting? - Animal behaviour, my dear.
- Have some coffee. - Right.
Mrs. Fontaine, is that Nancy Sinatra in that picture there?
- No, that's me - That's amazing, becasue I thought... you look just like Nancy Sinatra!
- What are you doing with Frankie Lindou? - Frankie gives High Tone his first record
-"Let's Live on Love", right? - ... I thought he was before your time.
- Well, Mrs. Fountain, good music has no time. That's my philosophy.
Darlette tells me that you are musician yourself? What kind of music do you play?
Well I actually don't have a name for it. I just pick up my guitar and play whatever comes out as what it is.
Kind of free form, experimentals.. That's what you're saying, John?
- Not exactly. - Johnny has a beautiful voice and...
...and he writes songs. - How sweet... You've already got a fan. I assume you have a tape?
- ... - Well send it to me next weekend...
Maybe I can persuade Jack Collins, our director, to give it a listen.
- Thank you very much, - THere's only one thing I ask in return...
It's to let me try on one of those beautiful shoes...
- Babe, what's the matter? - Darling...
I told you she hates me. She always has. Wants to take you away from me.
- No way, babe! Never happen! - My father didn't disappear...
She drove him away!... Because she knew how much I loved him.
When I was young I remember staring at the door, praying that it would open...
..and he'd be there to take me away forever - Oh babe, I'm never gonna leave you, I thought...
Will you take me home..?
Babe... you look so beautiful, right now
- Anymore crackers? - No...
Got anymore tea?
- Did I ever show you this picture? - No.
- Wow, that's a great picture! Who took it? - Flip.
We had so much fun dressing up and taking pictures of each other.
Yeah..? Babe, it's a little hard to me to understand how you could be having so much fun with...
- a guy who's supposed to be beating a shit out of you? - Well, I'm sorry Johnny! But we had fun.
- What do you want me to say? - Well maybe I should slap you a couple times...
- and we'll have some fun too? - I can't believe that you said that!
- I was just joking. I'd never... - It's over, Johnny.
- What!? - I can't pretend anymore. I don't love you.
I'm sorry Johnny but I won't be able to see you again.
- No! - Good bye, Johnny!
- So you're in a relationship yet? - No, not yet, but I'm working on it.
- Good for you. It's just a matter of time.
- Oh yeah, she's out there... somewhere...
- Know what? You're right, she is out there. In fact I just saw her in the next train-coach,
dressed up like Cinderella, asking everybody if he's seen a stupid fucking idiot who looks like you.
- Hey! What the hell are you doing? Huh?
- Man! I'm gonna get you for that. - Shut up!
- You wait, sucker! you better die! - Next time you keep your nose out of other people's bussines.
- Hey! you alright? you ok? - Keep away your fucking ass, pal!
- What!? - You're .. fucking man, picking up a little goddamned hands!
- That wasn't a kid that was a guy trying to get up your dress! - Get the fuck out of here!
- He got an antenna trying to lift up your dress! - I haven't seen any fucking antenna! Where?
You didn't see any antenna and nothing happened here and your underwear, excuse me for saying so..
...is not white with a little blue rabbits on!
- Hey, what!? - I'm sorry, ok? I'm sorry I thought that...
- you pushed him down the stairs, I'm sorry - No, I didn't push him. He trooped over my foot.
Good he haven't got any knife you know?
I'm not worried about knives. But these shoes are pretty light...
- What are these, bedroom slippers? - No, they are not bedroom slippers. Look!
One of the kind - black suede shoes. My name is Suede, by the way.
- Johnny Suede. - You're kidding me, right?
- No, I'm not kidding.. why would I be kidding? - Yvonne!
- That's a name you got, Yvonne? - Yes. What, what about it?
I knew a girl named Yvonne. She was a dancer in the Blue Bar.
- Yvonne! - I gotta go.
- Who is that guy? - It's...
See, I was just gonna say you looks kinda like a friend.
I gotta go. My band's practising cross the street.
Maybe you'd like to come by? - I am, but I can't. I gotta go.
Alright. But do me a favor, try to be a little more careful because I hate to say it there are guys around here..
..that would like to do a lot more that looking up your dress.
Hey, guys, I'm sorry I'm late, you're not gonna believe what happened.
I'm going in in the subway, this crazy guy pulls a nailbomb this long...
- What you do man? - Kicked that fucker right down the stairs!
- ...got man pushed down the train last night.
- Killed? - Cut his arm off!
- I've seen a cat cut in half, once. - Saw it happened?
- No, but I've seen putting him in the bags, though - Alright boys, let's make some music!
We start at...
One and two...
Hold it guys.
Hi! You showed up! Have a seat!
Guys, this is this is Yvonne. Yvonne this is B-Bop, a baseman, over here we got Conan...
..the King of Acordeon, and over here is Deke my right-hand man... ok?
Deke, give me some rocky beat.
- You're coming, Johnny? - No, I'm gonna stick around. I call you later!
- So what do you think? - Is there a phone round here? I really should call my friend!
- Come on, I can take criticism... - Well... I don't... really...
Forget it. I know what you're trying to say. I agree with you.These guys are terrible!
Even Deke, he's no help... He thinks being in band is all fun and games!
I write all the songs, I set up all the rehearsals, God...
- I mean the way I feel right now I'm ready to give all the thing up!.. - Don't you dare!
- Why not? - I liked the song. I'm not really sure...
..what is it about, but I liked it. I just say you guys need a little more practise, that's all
- You've got a pretty good voice! - Yeah?
I think so.
Yeah... yeah, you're right! I am being too hard on these guys!
Yeah... I just can't help it, I mean, this is my life!...
You know what I can tell about you? You really got good head on the shoulders.
- Do I? - Yea, I like that...
Seat down pal, I've got a secret news! Corina's brother's getting married...
..and wants us to play on the wedding! $ a piece!
That's great, man! That's great! Eee.. The B-bop called you?
Cause he's saying he's got this kick on a cruiseship and he's like leaving tomorrow...
- For how long? - Three months.
Just when things are starting to click, you know..!
- Yea, but can't we do a gig without? - No, I'm not playing without a goddamned base-player!
I guess, I can tell the photographer that we will paint the studio?...
- Without me - I'm sick of that shit! - Well I guess it's a time we took a trip
- to a barbershop... - What are you talking about, man?
Barbershop? ...have some good news!
That's what I'm trying to tell you, Johnny!
Is it loaded?
No, I didn't have any bullets.
Ok. We got to find a bullets...
..for . That'sa plan, ok?
- ...hold on to it - Ok...
So let's go to the club tonight knowing that you're free man again!
- I got plans tonight. - You're seeing Darlette?
- Yvonne. - I just think I will place tonight and have dinner...
You know, I met a schoolteacher once, man - She's a not schoolteacher!
She works with retarded kids and shit. I mean that's a big difference.
He said that he was gonna divorce his wife but waited for the right time, you know...
..years later, he was still waiting so I just left, I didn't even
say goodbye, leave a note or anything Did you ever lived with anybody?
Yeah, sure! Say, this is some good meal, you know!
- It's not even done! - Of course it is done!
- I put it back in the oven.
- Know what? That's ok! Because...
..it's getting late and I should be moving along!
- It's : ! - Hard to believe, isn't it?
- Did I say something wrong? - No... no!
I just have lot on my mind, that's all.
...B-bop is really upseting and...
- Oh well, ok. Well, thanks for coming up. - Thank you! I will call you and...
we'll do it again, sometime... How come you got black and blue marks on you?
- Kids. They're carried away sometimes - Kids did that to you?! I hope you smacked them back!
- That's it, you know... popped as I am.. - No, you didn't?! God! It's really funny!
I guess I'm in a funny mood.
- Ok... So Long! - So long!
(??) ...real kissing.
Mine as well.
- So I'll see you! - Bye.
- I find that I obtain, girl -É? Hold on a second. - Why?
- Eee... hold it..! - What!?
- What are you doing? - What's it feel like I'm doing?
- Well, it feels like you're trying to pick up a watermelon, see... - Well, do it your-damned-self, than!.
- Come here. - What!?
_ Come here, give me a hand... Come here...
- Ok, you feel that? - Yes.
That's my lip.
You feel that?
This is it... and this is not it..!
- This is it but this is not. - Yes.
See, what I made my mistake with Darlette is I let her see my hand...
I mean as soon as she found out that I like her...
- ...she flew like a goddamned bird. - She will sit on the ground one day.
- I know she will. But my point is that I learned an extremaly valueable lesson here...
- now with Yvonne, I can take it or leave it. - Yes, man, that's right, that's the way it is, Johnny! Just let them come to you.
I went to the class the other day, you know, just to take a glimpse of her lifestyle...
...and the moment I went in the kids start crawling all over me, messing up my clothes, messing up my hair...
...and than this girl comes up, with no reason reaping my favourite shirt! You know, I was so pissed. I just get out of there...
- I didn't even say goodbye, you know - Take it or leave it, right?
- Exactly! And that's the way I'm handling this one, man!
- You're not making love? - Of course we're making love!..
- You just see me the other night, man I was like a wild man, I was doing all kinds of things! - Like what?
- Like, well... she showed me where that little button is inside there, you know... - You didn't know where that was?
Yeah, I knew where it was. But know I can find it in the dark if I have to! And that...
..is a good thing for a guy to know!
- You know, Johnny, I'm glad we had this conversation. - Anytime.
I'm sorry man, I didn't mean to laugh but... I am really glad we had this conversation..
Turn on your TV, quick! There's a cowboy movie on with nobody
That's only kids, man!
- Yeah man, wven the horses are matched! - I'll look...
Damn! You just missed it! It's over.
Yea, I'm almost ready.
You didn't tell anyone of the meeting? Not? Good.
Just yell up to the window when you get here...
- Who is it? - Yvonne!
Hi! What a great surprise!
- Am I disturbing you? - No! Go in.
I'm just getting ready to go out with friends You just happened to be in the neighbourhood?
- No, I planned this actually. - Good.
- Hairdrier? - Yeah, doesn't work though.
- Too bad. Listen, are you avoiding me? - Why would I be avoiding you? No, god!
- Cause I haven't heard from you in a week. - Well I've been really busy! you know...
...practicing! Are you still pissed about Ginger reaping your shirt?
No, no... I mean I was pissed, you know for a second, it's my favourite shirt.
Well... she made this for you.
It's really nic-... SORRY I RIP YOU SHIT
Now, it's not funny. She reaps my shirt and calls me a shit. Chocking.
It's supposed to by shirt, you see: I'm sorry I ripped you shirt.
Oh, that's very nice.
And this is from me and rest of the class...
- Johnny?! - Just a sec...
Hey, Steve, I'll be down in a second!
Come on! The girl's legs are getting cold!
- What happened to your friends? - I remembered I didn't like them very much.
And I thought: hell, I haven't seen you for a while , maybe I can go up here and take a ride...
- Oh, thanks but I've already eaten - Oh no, I meant dancing!
- No, I get to get up in the morning - We'll not stay late and I'll have you home in a flash..
I'll wait out here while you get dressed..
What are you fucking choir-boy (?) ?
- Ready? - What!?
- Don't you wanna put that black stuff around your eyes? - Eyeliner?
- All the girls wear it in the club. Pretty sexy.
- Well I don't wear eyeliner. - Really? Why not?
I don't like it.
That's a pretty good reason.
- Which shoes should I wear? - One you want.
- Do you like these? - Yes, they're alright.
Or do you like these better?
Babe, you were dressing yourself long before I came on so why stop now?
- Only asking which of these you like - And I'm just saying. Wear the ones you like best, ok?!
- Why just you don't tell which shoes you like better? - Cause I guess I don't like either ones.
Those are fucking shoes that I have, ok? This is the way I dress and you know, goddamned what I wear...
- ...shit around my eyes! - Ok!
- What's the big deal? - No big deal.
- Let's just stop seeing each other, right? - Why!?
- Because it's very obvious to me there's nothing about me that you wants!- If it is so obvious, what the hell am I doing standing here, than?
- I don't have any idea. - Well, I guess I have to spell it out for you! I'm standing here...
..because I like you!
...it's a funny way you're showing it.
- It is ok? - No.
You've got kind of eyes that don't need any make-up at all!
- Shut up. - I'm serious.
Look, hey! I'm serious. You're beautiful.
I'm sorry I've threw a shoe at you.
It's ok. It's all right. Just please don't do it again cause I hate when people throw shoes at me.
Wise person who was missed...
- Get a smoke? - No, I'm out.
You Freak Storm, huh?
That's right. I've seen you before! What's your name?
John. Johnny Suede.
- What are you doing back here, Freak? - Meet someone that I wanna see.
- Nice shoes you have here, Johnny. - Thanks. I like your boots.
- Where did you get them? - I found them when I was living in Wyomming.
- What were you doing in Wyomming? - I've been all over, man.
- Me too - Yeah?
- I was born in a goddamned motel room - Really?
- Your dad was a traveling sellsman. - Daddy?
I don't know too much about my daddy, man except he was shot minutes after I was born.
- Wow, you're kiddin! - No, I am not fucking kidding.
Even tried to write a song about it, once. But I just didn't finish it.
It goes like this...
I was born in motel room When my daddy lost his job.
Just after one He pulled a gun and blew the brain down the...
They call me mamma'.. they call me mamma'...
The call me mamma's boy. But I don't care.
I'll be a mamma, I'll be a mamma's boy!
Since daddy get the electric chair!
- Pretty music, Freak. - No, it ain't. It's all piece of bubble.
- No man, you should finish it. - I can't, it's too very personal.
Did your daddy really get a chair?
- Well Johnny I don't really like talking about that. - I can understand that.
- You really liked that song Johnny? - Yeah, I do like...
- You can have it.
- You know I'm trying to start a band myself. - You do that? - Yeah!
The High Tone was interested for a while but that didn't go through.
- I sympathize with that - It's hard you know.
- I sympathize - Sometims I feel like giving up
- Do you, Johnny? - Yea, I do Freak.
I like you. Wanna turn you on for something. Check this out.
What is it?
MAKE YOUR OWN HIT ALBUM - $ - CALL RUDY AT HIT-
This guy, Rudy, is a friend... to my first album.
You got a tape?
-Well send it to him right away, make sure you send cash (...)
Wait a minute!
I'm gonna go and see this guy tomorrow. If you give me the money than I can give it to him.
Hey, that's great! That's fine by my!
I got it!
- You give it to him, man - Why!?
I don't want to bother with that... Oh hell I'll give it to him! I'll tell him you're a friend of mine.
- Special treatment. -Yes...
Thanks. That's great!
Don't mention it! Maybe one day you can make me a favor.
- Here! Have some chicken! - I can't, Freak! I gotta split.
- You have to split?
I start your fucking career for you and you gotta split?!
That's why your life's going fucking nowhere Johnny! Cause you gotta show a little bit goddamned gratitude!
- No, I am grateful, Freak! Really!
- This is good chicken. - It should be man I only found it this morning.
"I was born in motel room When my daddy lost his job.
Just after one He pulled a gun, his brain out...
Cops pulling me down the... (...)
That was the day my mamma told, since I could understand
...could take no pride, and the daddy killed a man.
They call me mamma..mamma...mamma's boy.
But hey, I just don't care! I've been a mamma...mamma..mamma's boy...
Since daddy got the electric chair."
- I'll make some tea.
- She still loves you...
- Does she? - She talks about you all the time.
- I told you I'd get you, didn't I?!
- How do you feel? - Terrible.
- What's that smell? - I made some soup. Do you want some?
- What type? - Vegetable.
- What type of vegetables? - Do you want some soup or not?
- Ok, I'll have some soup.
- Aren't you supposed to be in school? - Yeah...
I took a day off.
- I hope you know shaving the face is not like shaving legs - Why it says this?
- Already made this before? - Once or twice...
- With that married guy? - Why are you so curious?
- Have you guys been in tub? - No, we were in a jacuzzi.
- Anything else you wanna tell me? - Only this: you keep asking me a stupid questions...
- and I'm gonna smack you! - Big talk for a girl..!
- I hope you know shaving a leg is not like shaving a face.
...I've done this a million times...
- You're going a wrong way. - Look, lady.
You go your way, I go my way.
I love you, Johnny.
- For moving... ...against moving.
I'd suggest that you start with the reasons for moving ???.
- So let me have a couple! - Ok...
- She's got a color TV. - Here you go! Color TV... Next?!
- She's got an extra room. She says I can play my guitar in , kind like my own private room.
- That's nice!... private room...
- Next! - She's always got things around to eat...
like nuts, come crackers and shit...
- Hey, why you watch TV? You know what I'm saying?
- Yeah... - So.. we call it snacks!
- Anything else?
- Nope, no. - Let's proceed to the reasons against!
- I'd move into, I'd be locked up for hours a day! You know, go to bed...
there she is, wake up - there she is again!
- So you say you're feeling like a... - ...like I was in prison!
- Ok... prison.... -similarities!
- Good. - Next..?
I couldn't do any of the things the guys does, you know... I mean... say, I wanna walk around in my underwear!
No, say I had to make a fart! I'd have to go to my private room just to make a fart!
Yeah, you probably would..! Ok, things a guy does!
- Ok, next? - She threw a shoe in me once..!
That's bad, that's very bad...! Shoe-throwing things.
- How many is that? - It's tied up, and .
- Ok... Let's face it: she is probably the exact opposite type of girl I'd normally met, you know!
She's got weird job, she dresses funny, she can't even put on make-up!
- Opposite types. - That's us!...
- Here it is, pal! Three reasons for, four reasons against!..
- ... - Numbers don't lie!
- And hey, just because I don't move in doesn't mean I can't still see her, right?
- I don't know, man... - I mean... I DO like a girl...
Sometimes when I'm sitting around... she keeps grabing my ear really soft... I like that.
- That's not a reason for, man! - I don't know man, I mean the way you described it...
makes me wanna meet a girl like that.
- Tied up again, Johnny... - I know!...I gotta think!...
Ok. See that, color TV, never watch it!
- Are you sure? - Absolutely.
Now I just gotta find a way to break it to her...
- What is it you're thinking about?
- Well I guess I was thinking about a few things...
What I wanna say, is...
- He better give up calling me "Pain"..! >
- I don't know maybe thought you'd paint a place... -...
- If you don't like it why just you don't go home?
- Can I help you with something? - Yes, sir, you can get out of way so I may open the door.
- I prefer that you don't use this bathroom... - Ok, which one should I use?
- Well, if I'm not mistaken, there's a close little gas station around...
- Fine, thanks... - You'll find a rear door.
- The scum doesn't want me to use his bathroom...
- Relax, piss in the bucket.
- Where? - In the closet.
- Deke! ... a gun! - ...?
- Where did you get that?
- What are you doing? - Shit.
- Just talking! - That's nice.
- I can't believe it! - What!?
- This wall is covered with nips. - What are nips?
- This little item is a nip. ...
...my walls. Here's one... and here's another...
- We haven't paint it yet, man! - You're gonna to still this down and repeat for entire...
- the thing I detest is little nipes on the wall...
- What did you say? - He said "Mark those nips!"
- He did not! He said "Suck my dick!" - No, no, he said "Mark those nips!", that way we
- ...can start painting right away, sir!... - ...
- Come on man, it was just a joke! - Tomorrow, man, just, just don't even look at the guy, man, just...
paint a wall so we get the hell out of there!
- Today is my birthday. - Happy birthday...
- Come on...- Look, I might ask Boccelli now... >
- I joined a band.
- When? - Last week. I got tired wailing around, man.
- You pissed off? - No... no!
- Why should I be pissed off? - When are we gonna start one together, you know..?
- Forget it. Hey man, you got $ I can borrow? I got to pick some things up on my way home...
- Guess you're doing a shopping now..? - That's... really funny, man...
- You know what? I'll tell you something, I'm getting sick of you...
- Look man, I'm just trying to make some conversation. You don't like it? Go talk to someone else...
- You have a beer, that's dollars, pal!
- I can't believe it, man!
- It's my fucking birthday! And some guy who's supposed to be my best friend can't buy me a fucking beer!
...really gonna sound silly and I hope you don't take this wrong way but I saw you in a train...
...and I just wanna tell you you have the most beautiful legs I've ever seen.
- Thanks for everything, I had a lovely time!
- Wait a second..! - What?
- Yvonne! - Honey! >
- Glad I see you! - Where have you been?
- You're not gonna believe this! - What? Are you alright?
Yeah, I'm ok, but just fored a guy in a train...back guy got shot!...
- Oh god, oh my God! Was he killed?
- No, but he was hurt pretty bad! Of course cops kept everybody down there asking...
- the same questions, over and over again! - Well, why didn't you call me?!
- I tried! I said "Cops, I gotta use a phone!" they even wouldn't let me make a call, can you believe it...
- Fucking asshole! - I know! I ran all the way home...
- as I knew you'd be worried! - Oh, you must be starved. I'm glad you're ok...
- ...I've got a dinner in the fridge.. - yeah, I need to take a shower!..
- All right. - You bought me a cake?
- No baby, I made it! - You made me a cake?
- Are you sure you're ok? - Yeah, I'm ok.
- Look at all the presents! What is this, Christmas?
- Open it!
- Yeah? No, I'm gonna wait til we have our cake. I can't believe that you made this for me! It's perfect!
- What have you done? - Me? Nothing! Deke must have put those there...
...as some kind of birthday joke!... . I tell you that guy...
- ...has got sick sense of humour... - Stop it, Johnny. I could smell it all over you...
- since you've been walking thru' door! - I don't know what you smell, but I smell a guy's been working all day!
- You fucked somebody, ok?! I cut your shit!
Why!? Why?! You just tell me why you did it!
- Only thing I can say is I know you're gonna think this is stupid.
It felt like something was behind me all day, you know, pushing me and shoving... Do you know what I mean?
- Like a giant hand... pushing me from behind and I couldn't stop it.
And I started following this girl, nothing special about her, really, but every time I tried to stop...
the giant hand gave me another shov. And... somehow I ended up in her kitchen and we did it...
- So, she cooked you dinner? - Yeah, see what I mean? The whole thing is like a dream...
...and than we were in bed... But it's not like I enjoyed it or anything!
But for the first time in my life, I felt like I was home..!
- Well, Johnny, that's the biggest pile of shit I ever heard in my life!
- I tried to explain how I feel and you don't even try to understand!
- Oh, no, I understand! You saw a girl, you fucked her, she made you feel at home...
- and than you lie to me about the whole fucking... - When I said she made me...
- ...feel at home, I said, it felt like I was home! - Get out!
- What? - I can't even look at your fucking face, get out!
- I'm out of here, man. You think I need this shit? No!
- I am my own man! - You are a lying piece of shit!
- You know what I am?! I'm stupid for ever letting you talk me into moving into this scope in the first place! I got places...
I wanna go, I got things I gotta do!.. You think I want to be stacked here with a chick...
...who can't even put a fucking make-up?! No!
- Did I tell you about throwing shoes?! Did I?!
- I've been looking all over for you. Deke saw you from across the street.
Have been asking everybody if he's seen a guy who wears a suede shoe that looks like this...
- Where did you find it? - On the roof of the car.
- I looked all over minutes for this thing! I can't believe you found it!
- What happened to you? - I don't know.
- I'm sorry! I'm sorry! - Alright.
- No... - Calm.
- Yvonne, sorry...
And so our story ends. Did she forgive him?
Did they stay together? No-one knows.
And the one thing he was looking for...
Some people say he found it.
Other people say it ended up on side of the road...
somewhere just outside of Delaware.