Like Mike Script - Dialogue Transcript

Voila! Finally, the Like Mike script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the movie starring Bow Wow (no longer a li'l guy).  This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Like Mike. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. You won't hurt my feelings. Honest.

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Like Mike Script

               Let's run it.

               Hand a double-O-P, said crank it up   

               Shoot it up   

               Hand a double-O-P, come on, come on   

               Shoot it, shoot it   

               Sweep the faith, steal the ball   

               Turkey, what they are   

               Get out the way, fancy turn   

               Fake like Johnson, boss like Bird   

               Pass the rock like Jason Kidd   

               He got the scoop, that's what you done   

               And the crowd goes wild   

               Hand a double-O-P, said crank it up   

               Shoot it up   

               Hand a double-O-P, come on, come on   

               Shoot it, shoot it   

               Gonna listen to the whole light eight   

               I know we're facin' a  -point situation   

               With the face of time and with the game on the line   

               Go for a free throw, the championship's mine   

               Take it to the hole, let me do my duty   

               Perfect swish   

            Hey, punk.

            I been thinkin'...

            You been thinkin'? That's a change of pace.

            Got a pretty big mouth for someone so...

            - Don't say it. - So short.

            He ain't short!

            I'm not short. I'm just height-challenged.

            What's height-challenged?

            Better than bein' brain-challenged.

            You wanna back that big mouth up of yours

            and play me one-on-one for your jersey?

            Ox, leave him alone!

            What's the matter, Calvin?

            Don't push Murph, man.

            Would you guys just stop this?

            Calvin, let's just go.

            No, no. Let me handle this.

            Exactly how are you gonna handle this?

            Listen, if I say no...

            He beats you up.

            OK. Now, if I say yes...

            He still beats you up.

            And you'll lose your jersey.


            I can take him.

            I mean, Kobe wouldn't back down from no challenge.

            Allen Iverson wouldn't back down from no challenge.

            And Michael Jordan sure as heck is not backin' down from no challenge,

            And neither is Calvin Cambridge.

            E-Excuse me.

            Take a number, Ox,

            Because you're about to be served.

            They just don't make these things

            for... normal-sized people, you know?

            That's gotta hurt.

            Go on ahead and laugh if you want,

            but you guys won't be laughing when I get   new jerseys

            from the family who's gonna adopt me.

            You ain't gettin' adopted.

            Yes, I will, 'cause I have a destiny.

            All orphans are special. All orphans have destinies.

            Maybe in books, but you wanna name a real one?


            And Nelson Mandela and Marilyn Monroe

            and Daunte Culpepper.

            Who plays in the NFL.

            James Avery: This calls for champagne.


            I want a family like that to adopt me.

            Look how they just get along with each other.

            That's what I really want.

            Kid: Oh, man, why'd you do that?

            All right. Kids...

            let's get to work.

            Murph:Fresh candy.


            Right here.

            Hi. Would you like to buy some candy, ma'am?

            Hi. What about you?

            Fresh candy. $ .  .

            Hey, you guys wanna buy some candy?

            If you don't buy, I don't eat.

            Hey, you want some candy?

            Reg:It's for the Chesterfield group home.

            Calvin: Candy bar, anybody?

            Can we have some candy?

            Please, Daddy?

            No. We'll get treats inside.

            Girls, don't ever give money to a kid like this. It's a big scam.

            Joad is down low! He's open.!

            Tracy Reynolds, you need to pass the ball!

            But Tracy shoots!

            Both: And it's nothin' but...


            And the Knights lose by one.

            What was Tracy Reynolds thinking?

            No! No!


            Look at the coach.

            He's on fiire!

            Let's go back to work, man.

            Go back to work?

            Nobody buys when we lose, Murph.

            Man, you didn't even sell half your candy.

            We could lose our TV privileges... again.

            Is that Coach Wagner?

            I think so.

            S-Stay right here. I'll be right back.

            Valet: You have a good one.

            Thank you.

            Hey, coach.

            Bet you could use some candy after that one.

            Tough loss.

            You shoulda seen it up close.

            You had it won!

            You diagrammed the perfect play!

            Sure, Harrison didn't set the low pick,

            but why didn't Tracy pass the ball?

            Son... that is one for the ages.

            Hey, wait a minute.

            It's   :  . It's a school night.

            Do your parents know you're out this late?

            I'm an orphan.

            And I'm out here selling candy

            so that I can raise money for the group home.

            Oh. Well...

            listen, how 'bout this, uh...

            will that get me a chocolate bar?


            I can't charge you, coach.

            I don't even know if the money really goes

            to the... to the group home.

            What's your name, son?

            My name is Calvin.

            Calvin Cambridge.

            Calvin, have you ever seen the Knights play in the arena?

            No, sir.

            Well, since you won't take my money,

            how about if I get you some tickets for Sunday's game?


            You can pick 'em up at will call.

            I will! Thanks, coach. Nice talking to you.


            Hello. Good to see you.

            There's, uh, children everywhere, so...

            He's so adorable.

            I'm feelin' good about this, y'all.

            Today's the day I'm gonna get adopted.

            You ain't gettin' adopted. None of us are.

            Face it. We're like dogs.

            Parents only want the puppies.

              So much for me being special.

              Hey, things could change. I mean, your destiny could be right here

              and you don't even know it.

              Calvin! Where are you going?

              Off to do that history homework

              you owe me since yesterday?

              Yes, Sister Theresa.

              OK, Murph,

              there is a winter coat here

              that's just right for you.

              Try it on.

              Sister Theresa,

              do you know anything about these shoes right here?

              I'm not sure.

              It's a perfect fit.

              Well, the guy who dropped them off

              said they used to belong to some famous basketball player

              when he was a kid.

              Um... which...  which basketball player?


              you know, the...

              the tall bald one.


              Murph, Reg, come here, look.

              Look at the shoes.




              All: It can't be.

              Michael Jordan? Was it Michael Jordan?

              Go. Do your homework.

              It's gotta be! Michael Jordan wore these sneakers, man.

              Did you say... Michael Jordan?

              Yeah. I said Michael Jordan. Give 'em back.

              They could be anybody's. Let me take a look.

              No, man. They're his, man.

              Yeah, how do you know they're not?

              'Cause no one ever gives us nothin' good.

              Just abandoned junk that no one wants.

              Like us.

              Murph: We're not junk.

              Well, I want 'em!

              Oh, yeah?

              Then go get 'em.

              I want those sneakers.



              - Hmm? - Wake up!

              I gotta get those sneakers.

              Suppose Ox is right and they're not MJ's.

              They are MJ's sneakers.

              I know they are.

              Then we'll get 'em in the morning.

              Not in the morning. Not while Ox is around.

              Besides, they'll get ruined in the rain.

              I gotta get 'em now!

              Well, Calvin,

              seems like a really great idea.



              Calvin, be careful!

              Don't fall!





              The tickets were there just like Coach Wagner said.

              I can't believe we're gonna see a real NBA game.

              Oh, me, neither.

              How'd you get those tickets?

              We just did.

              I'm telling Bittleman.

              Ox, you can rat on us to Mr. B,

              but, uh, you'll miss the game, too.

              Yeah! Yeah!

              He just dunked the ball! He dunked the ball!

              Geoff Witcher: The Knights have one more chance here

              to chip away at this lead before halftime.

              They're not shooting well.

              Open at the wing is Reynolds.

              He puts it up...

              Oh, no good.

              Oh, man.

              Reynolds misses another shot,

              and that's the end of the first half.

              Minnesota Timberwolves out in front of the Knights by   

              and once again,

              the Knights did not play very good basketball

              in the fiirst half.

              Hey, good half. Good half.

              Good half. We're in great shape.

              Great shape. We'll win it back. Yeah.

              Henderson, attaboy.

              It's permissible to run in this game, incidentally.

              Yeah. Dvigatsya, Krilov. Dvigatsya. Yeah.

              Man: Tracy.

              Tracy Reynolds, hey, what a wizard.

              You're a magician out there tonight.

              Small favor.

              Oh, no. No, no. I don't do halftime shows, man.

              I'm not some chalupa giveaway.

              Hey, those chalupas upped attendance by     .

              You're familiar with Mr. Granger,

              the man who owns the team?

              I have a very good relationship with Mr. Granger.

              He hasn't called me in   years.

              He called this morning.

              And he's ready to clean house

              if we don't put some asses in those seats.

              Hello, Los Angeles!

              And welcome to your halftime show!

              Tonight, some lucky fan will get the chance

              to go one-on-one with Tracy Reynolds,

              the straw that stirs your L.A. Knights.

              Yeah, T-time, baby! Yeah!

              Check your ticket stubs.

              If your number is called, come on down!

              And bring your "A" game!

              Drumroll, please.

              Come on.

              Whoa. Oh, jeez.

              I have the winning ticket.

              Getting excited, Tracy?

              Yeah. Yeah, very excited.

              Well, so am I.

              And here we go.

              Section  ...

              row   ...

              That's our row, that's our row.

              Seat  .

              I got the ticket!

              Come on down! Show us what you got!

              Naw, I got the ticket.

              Listen, you little runt, if you can't score on me,

              how you gonna get by a Knight?

              Oh, shoot, here come a redcoat. Security.



              And here comes our winner now.

              All right. Heh heh.

              Well... boy, this is gonna be some contest.

              Well, son,

              what's your name?

              Ahem. Ca... Calvin Cambridge.

              Well, Calvin, I'd like you to meet Tracy Reynolds.

              Man, this is... this is crazy.

              This is so cool.

              How you doin', little man?


              All right.

              I'm playing Tracy. I'm playing...

              I can't even say it. I'm so happy.

              I'm playing T-time.

              Wait a minute. Was this supposed to do that?

              Man, this is kind of loud.

              Hey, stand up. Can you hear me?

              - Murph, stand up. - Calvin!

              I can't hear you.

              Calvin, up here!

              I still can't hear you.

              Jump up and down like a rabbit or something.

              The crowd is eating this up. Don't embarrass the kid.

              Let him score twice.




              Hey, Murph, we gotta get one of these.

              OK, OK, Calvin. Very good.

              Now, you're gonna have    seconds, OK?

              Let's get the show on the road!

              All right, all right. You ready, little man?

              Man: Hey, kid, tie your shoe.

              Thank you, sir.

              We like our players to be loose, not their laces.

              Make me like Mike.

              OK... go!

              Good luck to you, all right? Here we go.

              Whoo-hoo. Hoo-hoo.


              - You like that? - I'm jealous.

              - Whoo-hoo. - Aw, OK.

              Got that?

              Very nice.

              Calvin has just won himself an L.A. Knights sweatshirt.

              Computer: Chessmaster     .

              Would you like to play a game?

              And we begin.

              Pawn to queen  .

              That was really nice. That was really nice.

              Really? Thanks.

              Can't go that way. Can't go that way.

              I didn't know it was like that.

              Yeah, you didn't know it was like that?

              Uh-huh, can't go that way, either. Come on, now.

              Tracy Reynolds. Man, I play "D."

              That's what I'm playing.





              How did I do that?

              Now, how did he do that?

              He just won a signed basketball with an impressive   -footer.

              That one was sweet, wasn't it?

              Nobody said nothing about this kid embarrassing me out here.

              That's your last shot, little man. Recess is over.

              Bernard: One more shot,

              and he wins $    .

              Tracy Reynolds, baby. You got what,   seconds?

              Let's do it.

              I'm really sorry...

              It's all right, little man.

              Come on, little man. Come on.

              Come on, what you got?

              It's my gym, baby.

              Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

              Back. OK.


              Y... es.

              Computer: Pawn takes Knight.


              All right, Calvin!



              Go, Calvin!

              I guess this would be a bad time for me to ask for your autograph, huh?

              Hi there! Oh.

              Playing a little checkers I see, huh?

              Computer: Error. Error.

              I was about to win.

              So, are you the man I see about Calvin Cambridge?

              OK, let me get this straight...

              You guys want to have Calvin play for the Knights?



              I been coaching    years.

              This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of.

              Well, you didn't see him play at halftime.

              Hey, coach.

              Hi... again.

              Am I gonna be a Knight?

              He's    /  feet tall.

              I know.

              Can you imagine the press we're gonna get?

              Look, coach, I know attendance is in the crapper, OK,

              and I'm not averse to using the word "gimmick".

              This is about making money.

              I see. And speaking of money...

              Ah, yes, money.

              Mr. Bittleman, I'm prepared to make you an offer

              of $     for a one-day contract.

              Ah... well.

              Uh, seeing that I'm Calvin's guardian,


              I do have to make certain that nobody takes advantage of him.

              You mean except for you?

              Hey, I resent that.

              Uh, Mr. Bittleman, uh, perhaps, uh, perhaps, uh...

              an extra      might help

              ease your worries.



              I always knew that there was something special about Calvin.

              Wow, man, you're on the Knights.

              I can't believe you're gonna get to play in the NBA.

              I still can't believe what happened to me yesterday.

              Whatever I wanted to do with the rock, I could do.

              Whatever I wanted to do on the court, I could do.

              And there he was...

              Tracy Reynolds, NBA superstar...

              and I outplayed him.

              Yeah, man. And you hit that "J." Fade-away.

              Calvin: That was a swish. That was a swish.

              You alley-ooped yourself off the backboard.

              Reg: Yeah, that was hot.

              But... how?

              That's a good question.

              I don't know. All I know is that before I had these...

              All: Sneakers.

              I couldn't play like that if my life depended on it.

              Murph, hand me that ball.


              you're like some weird basketball Cinderella.

              Yeah, and the clock's gonna strike midnight

              if somebody finds out.

              Wow, I wish I was going with you.

              Me, too.

              We'll be rooting for you.

              - Come on, let's go. -Yeah.

              Hey, everybody.

              Hey, Trace, you need to get your notebook out

              'cause the kid is back to school you again.

              Ha ha ha. Your mama.

              Hey, Tracy, look, I'm sorry about the other day.

              No, no, no. It's all right, little man.

              No need to be sorry, all right? You got lucky.

              It's all right.

              Hey, I'm Joad.

              Why don't you take the locker next to mine?

              Here's your uniform, Calvin.

              Special ordered... ofiicial shirt, shorts,

              socks, and sneakers.

              Uh, but I like my own sneakers.

              Oh... ours aren't good enough for the kid.

              No, it's nothing like that.

              It's just that I play better in mine.

              Play? You just have to look good.

              What do you mean?

              Coach, may I please ask you a question?


              Coach, I have a lot of friends here tonight, and, uh...

              I was just wondering... wondering, am I here to play...

              or am I just here for show?

              Calvin, I'm gonna be straight with you.

              You were hired tonight just to increase attendance,

              not to play.


              But... I saw the tape

              of that halftime show you put on.

              You got some game.

              I am honored to have you on my team.

              Thanks, coach.

              You bet.



              Geoff: We've got a bigger than usual crowd tonight,

              and a lot of it is curiosity.

              The Knights have a brand new player.

              He's  -foot,  -inch Calvin Cambridge,

              joining us straight from the playground of the Chesterfield group home.

              Reggie, your reaction.

              Geoff, this is unprecedented.

              I can't imagine what the Knights players are thinking. We'll see what happens.

              We're gonna fiind out shortly.

              Both clubs are taking the court

              as we get ready for tonight's opening tip.

              Go Knights!

              What was that?!

              Admiral! Admiral!

              The admiral just waved at me.

              He just waved at me. Admiral!


              Come on! Hey! Hey!

              Geoff: Coach Wagner of the Knights has seen enough.

              He wants and gets a time-out.

              Let's go. Let's go. Good hustle, baby.


              Come on, guys. It's not funny.

              Now, offense, is there any play that's gonna work for us tonight?

              I have an idea.

              Oh, man.

              I've been watching,

              and they're vulnerable from the weak side,

              especially to a pick set away from the hoop.

              Why don't we run the give-and-give-and-go?

              You mean the give-and-go?

              No, see, they'll be expecting that.

              Have Tracy feed the ball to Henderson.

              Henderson's gonna feed the ball to Joad.

              Joad's gonna pass it back to Tracy.

              As Henderson sets the pick,

              Tracy's gonna take the shot.

              I like it.

              Oh, no. No. I'm not gonna run some play

              by some snotty-nosed kid, man.

              Damn straight, coach.

              Fine. Henderson, you're out.

              Tracy, you take Henderson's slot.

              Calvin, you take the shot.


              Have you lost your mind?

              - You said I could play anybody I want. - Yeah, well, I didn't mean him.

              Am I the coach or not?

              You are. For now.

              Can you believe it, Reggie?

              It looks like the kid's gonna play.

              A rousing welcome for the man they came to see,

              the little fella, Calvin Cambridge,

              into the game for the Knights.

              Calvin! Run the play!

              What's he doin'?

              - Run the play. - No.

              Would you just run the play?

              Time out! White!

              Why'd you call time out?

              Uh... I gotta pee.

              He's gotta pee.

              Announcer: Calvin Cambridge is calling for

              a bathroom break?

              I guess when you gotta go, Reggie, you gotta go.


              The crowd is roaring.

              That can mean just one thing.

              That little guy, Calvin Cambridge,

              has taken care of business in the locker room

              and is back on the court.

              He's done.

              Ladies and gentlemen, this kid's for real.

              He can play some basketball.

                 Tied up, tied up   

                 You got me so   

                 You got me so   

              Slam dunk over David Robinson!


                 seconds to go, the Knights trail by  .

              Trying to find some way to actually come back

              and win this thing.

              It's good! The Knights win!

              Am I a genius or what? Huh?

              Tell me I'm a genius!

              Announcer: This is the NBA on NBC.

              The big story in the NBA:

              Calvin Cambridge, the  -foot-  dynamo,

              has now signed a lucrative contract

              with the Knights.

              And no wonder, after he led them

              to a come-from-behind win over the Spurs with    points?

              That kid was unbelievable.

              Did I just see the admiral saluting him

              at the end of the game?

              You know, Cambridge's contract makes him

              the youngest, and the shortest person

              ever to sign a deal with the NBA.

              He's lean, he's mean, he's   .

              Yeah, now all the kids are gonna be saying,

              "I wanna be like Calvin".

              Well, I guarantee you one thing,

              this orphan will not be an orphan for long.

              I can't believe you're going on the road with the Knights.

              Can I fit in your suitcase?

              Hey, what about me?


              Hey, Calvin, this is great.

              Well, uh, I'm proud of you.

              Listen, uh, when you're on the road,

              uh, people might want to adopt you.

              But you should realize it's, uh,

              only because you're a celebrity now,

              and, uh, they're just after your money.

              Besides, your contract forbids it.

              Wait a minute. Forbids it?

              Oh, yeah. Didn't I tell you?

              Uh, I signed your contract as your guardian,

              so, um, as long as you're playing for the Knights,

              that can't change.

              Hey, coach, check this out!

              Pretty good.

              Welcome to Self-Hypnosis for the Fearful Flier.

              During today's peaceful flight,

              you'll transport yourself into a state...



              Relax. Flight's fine.

              Just came by to say hello.

              OK, my bad. I'm sorry.

              You are familiar with the NBA mentoring program,

              are you not?

              Oh, no. No. No. No.

              You don't even know what I'm gonna ask.

              No, I do know what you're gonna ask,

              and it's not gonna happen.

              You're trying to punish me.


              The kid's rooming with you.

              I think it would be good for both of you.

              We're goin' down!

              Whoa. Whoa.

              No. No. No. There is no way in the world

              I'm gonna be roomin' with that kid.

              I'm callin' my agent. You know why?

              'Cause it ain't gonna happen.

              This gonna be so cool roomin' together.

              Uh, my boy Murph says I snore.

              I think he has to be trippin' sometimes.

              Maybe we could rent NBA Street.

              Or if you don't like that, we could play Monopoly.

              Or if you don't like Monopoly,

              then we could just sit around and rap, because I love to talk.

              Oh, yeah, I noticed.

              Have fun, Tracy.

              All right, look.

              Coach says I gotta room with you,

              so let me set down the rules right now.

              First of all, I ain't your boy, OK?

              I'm not gonna be playin' Monopoly with you,

              Game Cube, Rubik's Cube...

              Anything with a cube, I ain't playin'.

              Third, you know, I'm not gonna be tuckin' you in at night,

              and I'm defiinitely not gonna read you

              the Three Little Bears, you got that?

              Whoa! Look at this!

              Do we always stay in places this fancy?



              All right, I'm goin' out.

              Oh, um, w-would you like some company?

              No. No, I wouldn't like company.

              Well, what do I do?

              Uh, well, um...

              oh, call room service, get some food.

              But what's room service?

              Right. Right. OK. Here's what you do.

              You pick up this phone, right?


              And you dial " ". Tell them what you want

              and they'll bring it to the room... for free.

              For free?

              For free. You got it. Eat up.

              No, you gotta be messin' with me, right?

              No, I'm not. Try it yourself.

              For free.


              Uh, yes. Um, is this room service?

              Yes, it is.

              And will you really

              bring me up some food for free?

              Well, sure. Anything you like, sir.

              You will?

              OK, um, in that case, I'll have a pepperoni pizza,

              french fries, and cake, ice cream, and lobster tails.

              Lots of lobster, lots of seafood.

              Chicken fingers, french fries...

              Ah, man.

              Um, you know what? Let me...

              I just want to clean up just a little, OK?

              Well, that's OK.

              No. No. No. I just want to clean up this...

              Hey, you're so beautiful, I have to clean up for you.

              No, it's all right.

              OK, so I'll be right back.

              Calvin, I need you...

              Calvin, what are you doing?

              What are you making such a mess for?

              You were right about room service.

              OK, Calvin. Calvin.

              Know what? I need you to get lost.

              OK? I don't care where you go, just get lost.

              Joad wants to play NBA Street.

              No, Calvin, not in there. Calvin, no! Calvin!

              Calvin! Calvin!


              Hey, you know what?

              The maid forgot to come today

              and, you know, maybe we could go to your place?

              Is someone else in here?

              Because I thought I heard some voices.

              Oh, there's...Really. There's no one in there.

              Oh, my God.

              Oh, where'd he come from?

              You're Calvin Cambridge, aren't you?

              Oh, my God. Are you OK?

              We're gonna get you out of these clothes

              and get you some air, OK?

              Oh, brother. Here we go.

              Oh! You are just the sweetest thing!

              Isn't he just the sweetest thing?

              Tracy, you should have told me Calvin was your roommate.

              Yeah, well, it must have slipped my mind.

              See, me and Tracy are tight.

              So that's why I call him T-time.

              So cute.

              So, what's your nickname for Calvin, T-time?

              I don't have one yet,

              but, oh, so many of them come to mind.

              Is that better, baby?

              Yeah, I think T-time needs some, too.

              Oh! Ha ha!

              $     jacket.

              Gettin' water on a $     jacket.

              Couldn't you just eat him up?

              Sorry about taking your girl.

              She's not my girl, and you didn't take her.

              I don't know what it is. It's like some type of curse.

              The girls just like me.

              Can we go to sleep?

              Well, aren't we gonna say our prayers?

              'Cause at the home we always say our prayers.

              We're not at the home.

              Well, I can't go to sleep until I say my prayers.

              Then say your prayers.

              All right.

              Well, aren't you gonna say 'em with me?

              Bow your head. Bow your head.

              Both: Now I lay me down to sleep,

              I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

              If I should die before I wake,

              I pray the Lord my soul to take. Amen.

              God bless Murph, God bless Reg,

              God bless Coach Wagner,

              God bless Michael Jordan,

              and God bless Tracy.


              Anybody that you want to bless?

              A girlfriend, or your parents, maybe?

              No, my parents are gone.

              Hey, um...

              I'm sorry.

              I guess that makes you an orphan like me.

              Yeah, I guess.

              Why don't you get in bed?

              All right. Good night.

              There's just one thing.

              Can we sleep with the light on?

              'Cause at the home

              we always sleep with the light on.

              OK, we'll sleep with the light on. Satisfiied?

              I don't wanna hear another sound tonight, OK?

              Good night.

              Oh, man.

              What's the matter, Tracy? Late night?

              Yeah, real late night. Heh.

              Ain't that right, Trace?

              Really? How late?

              See, there's this girl named Janet Kelly came up to the room, fine as can be.

              She picked me and Tracy up.

              We didn't come back to the room about  :   in the morning.

              He doesn't know better,

              but you know the rule about the ladies in the room,

              and last time I checked, curfew was midnight.

              No, it was his snorin' that kept me up all night.

              Oh, you always got an excuse.

              Look, if you think helping him break curfew

              is gonna get you out of being his mentor,

              you're mistaken...

              and if you miss curfew again,

              I'm gonna have to suspend you. Got it?

              Yeah, I got it.

              You know what, man?

              You got to learn how to chill.

              Tracy, I'm so sorry. I didn't know.

              Don't worry, man.

              I won't mess up again. I promise.

              Yeah, I know it's not gonna happen again.

              You know why? Because you're gonna go your way,

              and I'm gonna go my way.

              Tracy, we still gonna be cool on the court, though, right?


              Um, Mr. Iverson, sir,

              uh, you're one of my favorite players.

              Who are you, the mascot?

              I was wondering, may I please have your autograph, man?

              Players don't ask players for autographs.

              - Player? - After the game?

              How'd he do that?

                 They're playin'basketball   

                 We love that basketball   

                 They're playing basketball   

                 We love that basketball   

                 They're playin'basketball   

              Calvin Cambridge,

                 points a game. Not tonight.

              You just need to get back

              to that sandbox where you came from.

              - Sandbox? - Yeah.

              How you gonna say I gotta go to the sandbox?

              Your last name's Kidd.

              Look at the back of your jersey. Look.

              Relax. See what you got.

              Pat Croce:All of a sudden, things are clickin'for the Knights.

              Ever since Calvin's arrived, there's teamwork.

              So what's is it like for you two playing together?

              Well, um, it's been, uh...

              It's been great! Really great!

                 We love that basketball   

                 Now basketball is my favorite sport   

                 I like the way they dribble up and down the court   

                 I keep it so fresh on the microphone   

                 I like no interruption when the game is on   

                 I got the rock in my hands   

                 Ain't no tellin' what I'm gonna do with it   

                 When I got possession, I'm gonna have to fool with it   

              Personally, I'm worried about

              steppin' on Calvin Cambridge tonight.

                 ...and fake one way   

                 Turn around and hit you with the MJ fade-away   

              Come on, ref!

              Jump ball.!

                 ...passes like J-Kidd, taking cats to the rack   

                 And I'm dunkin' over them like T-Mac   

                 When I'm in the paint   

                 I play with that Alonzo style   

                 My favorite play is the alley-oop   

                 I like the pick-n-roll, I like the give-n-go   

                 And it's basketball, bow wow, let's go   

                 They're playin'basketball   

              Calvin, these people are not your friends, OK?

              They're like... They're like a pack of tigers, you know,

              chasing those things with the stubby little horns.

              You know, you've seen those deer-like things,

              and they isolate one of them,

              and then they pounce!

              Good to see ya.

              Female Reporter: Calvin, over here.!

              Male Reporter: Calvin.!

              I've seen Calvin play,

              and, uh, he's nothin' that I can't handle.

              Reg: Thanks, Calvin. These are great.

              Wow, thanks, Calvin.

              No problem. Enjoy it, everybody.

              Get Bittleman!

              Reg and Murph: Yeah, get him!


                 We love that basketball   

              We have twins.


              Hey, Calvin.

              Listen, man. Uh, can I get your autograph?

              Sure, Dirk.

              Uh, it's actually for my niece.

              What's her name?

              Uh, it's, uh, Dirk.

              Yes, it's Calvin Cambridge bobblehead doll night,

              but everybody's wondering what's keeping the Knights?

              "Who were the U.S. Presidents of the   th century?"

              Can't she wait till after the game for his homework?

              No homework, no game.

              But I've gotta get Cal...

              You got a problem with that?

              I got dogs bigger than him, man.

              Look like a little chihuahua or somethin' like that. Come on.

              - Oh! - Oh!

                 They're playing basketball   

                 We love that basketball   

              Announcer: Welcome to the NBA slam dunk competition.



              Announcer: Big vertical leap!

              Next up,  -foot  -inch Calvin Cambridge.

              The little guy is flying!

              Cambridge wins it!




              I was wondering. What is it like to be famous?

              Ah. It's all right.

              You know, um...

              You know the celebrities you see on Oprah

              complainin'about how tough it is?

              They must be crazy. I mean, I'm gettin'paid to play in the NBA.

              The crowd loves me.

              I get room service.

              I got everything I ever wanted.

              Well, almost.

              Go back to sleep, all right?

              What are you doin'? Get off!

              I'm takin' a look at these MJ sneakers.

              Man, you ain't gettin' em.

              Gimme the sneakers!

              Gimme the sneakers.

              Come on, Ox. Get off.

              Get off! Hold Murph.


              Gimme the sneakers!

              You can't have 'em! Get off my sneakers, man!

              Get off him!

              Gimme your sneakers, Calvin!

              - Get off my sneakers! - Hey!

              Hey, hey! Stop! Get off!

              Get off Calvin!

              Do not hurt Calvin!

              What are you doing? Are you OK?

              Look, do not hurt him.

              Do you know how valuable he is to me?

              It's his sneakers. That's how he can play so well.

              You lay one more hand on him,

              and you're sleeping in the basement.

              All right, everybody.

              Go to sleep.

              It's all over.

              Good night.

              Joad: Come on. Get outta the way.

              No, I'm in first place. Why would I let you by?

              Oh. I ain't see, why you got your... My hand ain't all in your face.

              What's with the bumpin', man?

              I'm about to win the Daytona Cup.

              Get outta the way.

              Oh! Whoo! Who's your daddy?

              That's only   man.

              You can't get me   in a row. No way.

              Hey, T-time. I just whupped on Joad again.

              See, I call Tracy "T-time." Hey, T-time,

              how come you haven't given me a nickname yet?

              I don't know.

              See, I've been thinkin' about somethin' like

              "C-square," or "C-cam," or "C-bridge."

              I'm gonna pick up some allergy medicine.

              I might pick up some sleeping pills

              so you don't keep me up with your snorin' all night.

              Oh, um... well, uh,

              can I go?

              Heh. Well, uh, no.

              Hey, um, Trace, but, um, well, l...


              Don't take it personally, Cal.

              He doesn't even like to spend time with his own family.

              - Family? - Yeah.

              I thought he didn't have any parents.

              No, he's still got his dad.

              He just doesn't talk to him.

              Radio Deejay: Sacramento, capital city,

              hip-hop's super station.

              Oh. Oh, yeah. This is my song right here.

                 Y'all gonna make me lose my mind   

                 Up in here, up in here   

              Go, X! Ha!

                 Go all out, up in here, up in here   

                 Y'all gonna make me act a fool   

                 Up in...    Oh!

              What you doin' here, Calvin?

              Stairs are faster than the elevator.

              Dang, your rappin's despicable. Terrible.

              Sound like Michael Jackson with a sore throat, man.

              Oh, my rappin' sucks? OK, can you do better?

              Let me see you do better.

                 To be messin' with me, ain't strong enough   

                 So y'all gonna make me act the fool, up in   

                 What? What? What-What?   

              - Cal.

              Calvin, Calvin, Calvin.

              Stick to playin' basketball, man.

              'Cause you know why? 'Cause you can't rap.

              You can do better?

              I can do better.

              Let me see you do some.

                 Up in here, up in here   

                 Y'all gonna make me lose my mind   

                 Up in here, up in here   

                 Y'all gonna make me...  

              - TLC. - There you go.

              Fishin' pole on 'em.

              - Aah. - Uh-oh, pop lock.

              OK, can you bring me some? Bring some. Bring some.

              All right.

              - Whoa. - Uh-oh. Pass it back.

              Pass it back. Oh!

              -   Won't you    - Oh!

                 Meet me outside with my rough riders   

                 Meet me outside, meet me outside   

                 Meet me outside   

                 Meet me outside, meet me outside   

              - Tracy. -    Meet me outside   

                 Meet me    What's goin' on?

              How come you told me that your dad was dead?

              And he really isn't?

              - Calvin, look, look, no. - Why?

              I don't wanna talk about this right now, OK?

              But I don't understand, Tracy.

              I would do anything... anything... to have a father.

              Don't worry about it.

              Wait right here.

              Ah. Excuse me.

              I'm here to pick up my order.

              I can help you with that.

              What's the name?

              Reynolds. Tracy Reynolds.

              I thought I recognized you.

              - Right. - I seen your ads.

              You're that, um, accountant, right?

              You comfortable?

              Very much so, yes.

              So you know my name.

              Um, do you have a name for me?


              Allegra? That's a very pretty name.

              Allegra. Is that French? Spanish?

              It's your allergy medicine.

              See, I knew that. I knew that 'cause my parents was from France.

              Come on.

              Now these are your sleeping pills. Red cap.

              - OK, OK. - They're very strong.

              So take one right before bed.

              Got it.

              This is your allergy medicine. Blue cap. Take one twice a day.

              - OK.

                once a day. I got it.

              Thanks for your help.

              Oh, and Tracy...

              that crossover move you do to your left,

              you're telegraphing it.

              Oh. See, I knew.

              I knew you knew about Tracy Reynolds.

              I knew you...I knew. See, I knew you would...

              Yeah. Well, bye.

              What-What took you so long?

              It's almost curfew.

              Don't worry.

              We'll be back at the hotel in a minute.

              You all right?


              It's like butter, baby. What? What?

              Are you all right, man?

              Uh, yeah. I'm good. You sure?

              Mm-hmm. Mmm. I'm good.

              I worry about you sometimes, Tracy.


              What? What's up? What's up? What?

              I don't want you doin'nothin'crazy like fallin'asleep on me! Man, wake up!

              OK, OK, all right. Put the pool in back,

              put the diving board in the shallow end.

              And I'm all good. This is all so...



              - Tracy!


              I can't see squat. Dang!

              Hmm? Allegra.



              you better hold on for this one.



              Hey, Trace. Trace. Check it out.

              Calvin got benched for goin' out joyridin' last night.

              What'd he do somethin' like that for?

              I don't know.

              He did it to keep you from getting suspended.


              How do you think you got back last night?

              Listen, um, I'm sorry you got suspended.

              And this is really hard for me to say, but...

              I appreciate what you did for me.

              You had my back... C-dog.

              You're welcome, T-time.

              All right. Now listen, the team really needs you to win

              so why don't you get some sleep, all right?

              You really that afraid of the dark?


              Hmm. Listen, don't worry about it.

              'Cause, you know, we all have our fears.

              Like me and this whole flying thing, man.

              - Yeah. - It scares me.

              Well, see, my thing is, you're getting on the plane.


              That's brave.



              OK, OK. So since I'm brave in gettin' on this plane,

              why don't you be brave...

              and turn off the light?

              I don't know.


              Are you prepared for that big test tomorrow?

              Yes, Sister Theresa.

              Reg, you have to help me, please.

              I'm not helping you with your geometry.


              Because I don't understand it any more than you do.

              Welcome, everybody, and follow me into the room.

              Who are all those people?

              Parents, here to see you.

              What's wrong, Murph? I mean, that's a good thing, right?

              Good for you.

              It doesn't do us any good.


              Congratulations. Go get adopted.

              What's wrong with him?

              What do you think?

              I don't know.

              Bittleman told me that I couldn't get adopted.

              And you believe Bittleman?

              Coach Wagner On Phone: His contract says nothing about adoption.

              Look, why would you send all of these people here?

              Calvin deserves a home.

              You're only interested in making money off him.

              Look, with all due respect, Coach Wagner,

              child custody law is very complex.

              Mr. Bittleman.

              Coach Wagner: Just because you signed his contract as his guardian...

              I'll call you back. I'll call you back.

              Coach Wagner: Wait! I'm not through talkin'...

              Yes, what is it, Calvin?

              You lied to me.

              What are you talking about?

              You told me no one can adopt me.

              I never said that.

              Look, Calvin,

              bear in mind I have cared for you

              way before you were rich or famous,

              and all of those people in there,

              the only reason that they're interested in you

              is because you're famous.

              I'd like to see for myself.

              Well, that's fine.

              I will, um...

              make arrangements with the very best candidates.

              What do you think about that, my big man?

              We've been doing musical dinner theater now over   years.

              ... In over    cities. ... Mm-hmm.

              No more hard-knock life for you, Calvin.

                 The sun'll come out tomorrow   

                 Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow   

                 They'll be sun   

              We run a tight ship, Cambridge!

              Roll call     !

              I think you're gonna flip

              for my sugar-free seaweed rice cream.

                 I just stick out my chin   

                 And grin   

              All right, good buddy.

              Now Denise here will home school you

              'cause we're on the road   - .

                 And I say   

              Ya, Ras Clap, ya have to come back with me, ya seein'?

                 Tomorrow, tomorrow   

              How tall are you, boy?! How tall are you?!

              You'll learn to hold your bladder.

                 We love ya tomorrow   

                 You're only a day   


              You see, Calvin?

              You're best off here...

              with me.

              Hey, yo, Trace.

              Tracy: Hello?

              It's me, Calvin.

              Calvin. Wait. You're here?

              Yeah, I'm here,

              and it took me   busses to get here, too.

              Uh, all right.

              Dang. Man, this is where you live?

              Calvin, what are you doing here?

              Hey, I just can't wait to see the inside.


              Calvin, wait. Calvin.

              Come on, Calvin. Tell me why you're here.

              Aw, this is tight.

              Look at all the stuff you got, man.

              Yeah. Yeah, it's tight.

              So come on, man, tell me what's up. Why you here?

              I wanna check your place out.

              You know, just look at your crib and everything.

              What do you call this game?

              I have no idea. It came with the house.

              Oh, man.

              So you're not gonna tell me why you're here?

              We need one of these at the orphanage.

              OK, OK. So I take it you don't wanna tell me

              what's goin' on with you. I understand.

              It's your prerogative. That's cool.

              No, I mean, nothin's goin' on.

              I mean, everything's all right.

              Everything's goin' real well.

              Everything's perfect.

              Uh, everything's, uh,

              you know, uh...

              All right, man.

              Everything's goin' real terrible right about now.

              My best friend Murph, he's mad at me.

              Bittleman lied to me.

              He set up the worst parents in orphan history

              to come meet with me.

              And then, on top of that,

              I have a geometry test tomorrow, and I hate geometry.

              Mmm. All right, well, listen,

              I'm sure the right parents are gonna show up for you, OK?

              It's just a question of time, so you gotta have a little faith.

              All right? But in the meantime...

              call your boy Murph.

              - Right now? - Right now, yes.

              Good friends are hard to come by,

              so you gotta keep things straight with 'em.

              You have your geometry work with you?


              You know a little somethin' about geometry?

              Do I know about geometry?

              Ha ha ha! Do I know about geometry?

              Take-Take your time on that call,

              and, um, meet me outside.

              I gotta... I know geometry, but let me...

              OK, now, the key to the whole geometry thing

              and gettin' the hang of these triangles is to super-size them.

              - Super-size? - Super-size.

              You painted your house.

              All right, look. Tell me what triangle this is right here.

              All right, look. Tell me what triangle this is right here.


              I'm not familiar with this one. I don't know.

              All right. Let me give you a hint.

              So you got MJ over there

              posting up a small point guard, right?

              You got Rodman over there

              on the other side of the court with his hair.

              Now Pippen comes to screen for Michael.

              So what do you got?

              Well, this is the Bulls' triangle offense, right?


              We're just givin' room for Michael to isolate.

              Isolate. Isosceles. An isosceles triangle.


              The Lakers use this triangle offense.

              This triangle has equal sides for Kobe and Shaq.

              Equal sides. OK. This is an equilateral triangle.

              There you go. See, you're gettin' it.

              You're gettin' it. OK. OK.

              Uh, I got this.

              You got this one?

              - OK, now this is us. - Uh-huh.

              And you know the type of triangle offense we use

              is the acute offense... well, the acute triangle offense.

              - OK. - That's because

              Calvin Cambridge is so damn cute.

              Oh, man, give me a break. I'm the cute one.

              - No, I am. - No, see.

              Look at the picture. I'm the cute one.

              - No. - OK, go ahead. Fine.

              All right. So...

              OK, see, here's Joad, right?

              - Right. - This is Joad.

              Joad's gonna take the ball out.

              He's gonna pass all the way to you.

              - OK. - You're right here.

              - Right. - See me?

              I'm gonna be headin' down court

              for the full-court lob pass just like this, right?

              Oh, hey, Calvin. Calvin.

              Don't put paint on my windows, all right?

              But I'm gonna be wide open.

              You gotta pass me the ball.

              I'm warning you, all right? Don't do it.

              And then...

              Wham!   points for me

              and the assist...

              to Reynolds.

              Oh, OK. So you think you're cute

              puttin' the paint and then messin' up the house, huh?

              Well, let me see what we've got.

              Let's say if I went and did...

              Oh! Aw. Hey!

              Orange looks nice on you, man.

              That's not funny.

              No, it really is funny 'cause it looks nice.

              It goes nice with the blue and...

              Oh, really?

              Yeah. You kinda look like a rainbow or...

              Well, the orange looks really nice...

              Calvin, I know you're not gonna do that.

              - Oh! - On you!

              You really think it's funny?

              No, no, no, no, no!

              What are you doin'? Cal. Calvin.

              Calvin. Whoa!


              You must be Tracy.

              You must be Murph.

              Yeah, that's me.

              What's up, Murph?

              Hey, Cal. You all right?

              Yeah, I'm pretty good.

              But can you believe the cab ride here cost    bucks?

              You should have took the bus.

              Tracy, can you lend me   .  ?

              Heh. All right, Murph.

              I'll go get my wallet.

              So what have you guys been up to?


              Think you could teach me?

                 All I'm tryin'to do is get my dough on   

                 I'm your boy,you're my girlfriend   

                 Stop, hold up   

                 I ain't in no kind of rush to grow up, so slow up   

                 I'm just playin'the game   

                 Let me warn you, girl   

                 Before you get rough with me   

                 You might think you got me, but you never really get me   

                 So don't trip if you see me doin'my thing   

                 I told ya   

                 I'm just playin'the game   


                 Playin'the game   

              - Aah! - Whoa!


              When Calvin Cambridge comes to your town,

              you'd better watch out.

              Well, that was the fiinal word from Gary "the Glove" Payton tonight

              after the Seattle Sonics battled it out

              with Cambridge and the Los Angeles Knights.

              Yeah, now you know what it feels like to be in the glove.

              It's more like a mitten, Gary.

              Kenny Mayne: The Knights rallied around Cambridge after that,

              and before it was all over, Payton got the gate.

              Get him outta here, Ref.

              Rich Eisen: And Kenny, how about the way

              Reynolds jumped in to protect Cambridge?

              How about that?

              They're startin' to come together, Rich.

              The team's gelling at this point,

              and with   games left in the season,

              they are only   wins away

              from their first ever trip to the play-offs.

                 Take it to the top   

                 Get your head in the game   

                 Get your head in the game   

                 Get up out your seats or you got no one to blame   

                 Rise up, giddyup   

                 The Knights is flyin'higher   

              The Knights win!

              Yes! Ha ha ha!


              - Oof. - Aah!

              Coach, great game. Great game.

              Fellas, unbelievable. Hey, guys,

              I gotta pinch myself. One more win

              and we're in the play-offs,

              and you know what that means

              for every man in this organization?

              Bonuses. Ha ha. Contract renewals.

              We'll all have jobs next year.

              You two together...

              this works.

              Come on. Let's go.

              So you still haven't met any parents you liked?

              I don't know.

              Nobody seems right.

              Murph: Maybe nobody seems right

              because you already met the right person.

              What right person?



              Listen, Murph,

              Tracy can't even take care of himself.

              You like him.

              Yeah, so?

              That doesn't mean he wants to adopt me.

              Well, why don't you ask him?

              Listen, Reg, Murph...

              Tracy's not big on families.

              He doesn't even talk to his own dad.

              I mean, how can you have a dad

              and not talk to him?

              Man, that's nuts.

              It ain't cool.

              Can you do anything?

              You're back again?

              Yeah, uh, I got a surprise for you.

              Somebody I want you to meet.

              Oh, OK. I hope she's wearin' a bikini.

              Nah, it's not a woman. It's-It's your number-one fan.

              Well, it has to be a woman, right?

              Calvin, why'd you bring him here?

              This is your dad.

              You don't want to talk to him?

              Listen to me.

              Now stay out of my business and get him out of here. Now.

              How could we lose to the Bulls?!

              We were out of synch, especially Cambridge and Reynolds.

              What's the matter with you two?

              This was your gimme.

              Now you have to beat the Raptors or we're out, you got that?

              We're gonna have to tighten it up, guys.

              Pull this thing together.

              Damn it!

              All right, listen, Cal...

              - What's wrong?

              I give up on ever finding somebody to adopt me.

              Well, I wouldn't do that just yet.

              Well, hello, Calvin.

              We've been waiting for you.

              We're the Boyds.

              We're from Bel Air.



              What's the matter?

              You've had something on your mind all night.

              Nah. No, I haven't.

              It's Calvin, isn't it?

              As we hit the end of the regular season,

              the big story is this weekend's showdown

              between the Los Angeles Knights and the Toronto Raptors.

              Both teams need a victory to make the play-offs.

              Man, this is personal.

              It's play-off time, and my job is to shut Calvin Cambridge down.

              Besides, what does a little kid know about the play-offs?

              For the Knights to have any shot at winning this game,

              Reynolds and Cambridge better get back in synch,

              and Cambridge better bring every weapon in his arsenal.

              Ha. Hey, man. How you doing?


              Cool, cool, cool.

              Hey, I wanted to ask you,

              uh, is it true what you said about Calvin's, uh, sneakers?

              I guess.

              "I guess?" Don't "I guess" me, you idiot.

              Is it because of the sneakers?

              Huh? Huh?

              Uh-huh? Yes?


              Yeah, yeah. OK.

              All right, hey, thanks.

              Ha ha. Cool, cool.


              But I have to wear my sneakers.

              Right, right.

               But-But they're sneakers.

                They're not...They're not proper attire for brunch at the Boyds.

                You just want to make your best possible impression.

                So put on these shoes, look good,

                and maybe you'll get adopted.

                Go on.

                All right, Murph.

                Guard these with your life, all right?

                I will.

                Good luck with the Boyds.

                I hope they're the right ones.

                Yeah, me, too, man.

                See you later, man, all right?

                Make me like Mike.

                I guess they don't fit me, Mom, huh?

                Where are they?

                Where are what?

                The sneakers.

                I don't know what you're talking about.

                Bittleman: I don't want to do this.

                No! Not my mom's picture!


                All right. I'm gonna ask you one last time.

                Where are Calvin's sneakers?

                All right, you're not gonna tell me?

                OK, all right, here we go then.

                I'm gonna light it.

                Say good-bye to mom!

                Bye. There she goes.

                - Bye, Mom. - No! No! Stop it!

                Burning. This is your fault.

                It's your fault.

                No! They're in the attic!

                Attic! Attic... Ow!

                Ah! Good! All right.

                Good. In the attic.

                Good, good. Good.

                All right. Now, you want to see this again?

                Do not say anything to Calvin.

                I'll get it!

                l-It's all right. It's all right.

                I'm-I'm really sorry.

                It's OK. I know. It's OK.

                Excuse me, uh, Mr. Williams?

                It's possible.

                My dentist, Frank Nister,

                said that I might be able to find you here.

                Who's Nister?

                You know, the guy with the ear.

                Um, my name is Stan Bittleman.

                What can I do for you, Mr. Bittleman?

                I'm looking for a, uh, sports broker,

                uh, to make a sizable investment

                in the Raptors to beat the Knights.

                Why are you speaking in code?

                You want to place a bet? How much?

                $      .

                That's a lot of money.

                You good for it?

                Of course I am.

                What makes you so confiident?

                Well, let's just say I have a good feeling

                that Calvin Cambridge is going to have...

                an off game.

                Tell me more.

                We were gonna wait till later

                to tell you this, but, um, well, I can't wait.

                Calvin, tomorrow we're going to finalize your adoption,

                and you will oficially become a Boyd.

                A Boyd?

                Yeah, a friend of mine told me

                this would be a pretty good place to come.

                Any place would have been great.


                I want to talk to you about something, man.

                Something, um... something pretty big.



                I don't know. I've been doing a lot of thinking.

                Just thinking about what's best for you

                and-and for me.


                Well, l...

                Absolutely, coach.

                Oh. Um, Tracy,

                I would like you to meet the Boyds.

                The Boyds are gonna be my...

                My parents.

                Mr. and Mrs. Boyd: Hi.

                Mrs. Boyd: Very nice to meet you.

                It's... It's nice to meet you, too.


                you guys are very, very lucky.

                Don't we know it?

                What-What was the big news that you wanted to tell me?

                Oh, oh, right. Right.

                Um, you know the pick-and-roll, right?

                I'm gonna do the pick,

                but I ain't... I ain't gonna do the roll.

                That-That was the big news?


                It's nice to meet you guys.

                Nice to meet you. Same here.

                Ooh! Dear, we better claim our seats.

                Oh, yes, yes.

                Well, uh, we'll see you after the game, son.

                God, that sounds great.



                Yo, is anybody there?

                Tell him.

                l-It's Murph, and I got something to tell you.

                I screwed up big time.

                I didn't mean to tell him, but then...

                But then Bittleman was gonna burn my mom's pictures. I had no choice.

                Murph, just slow down, man. Tell him what?

                I told him about the sneakers, and now they're in Bittleman's safe.

                That-That's just crazy.

                The sneakers are right here in my gym... bag.

                Oh, no!

                What are you gonna do?

                The game starts in    minutes!

                Wait. I have an idea.

                I'll meet you ASAP.

                ASAP. Got it.

                Wait. What's ASAP?

                All right! Bring it in, gents, bring it in.

                Let's go.

                Wait a minute, wait a minute.

                Where's Cambridge?

                What, man? He's not here?

                Check the bathrooms.

                Oh, man! Dang!

                Geoff: And the opening tip goes to the Raptors.

                With Calvin Cambridge nowhere in sight,

                a lot of things may be going the Raptors'way today.

                OK, look, if you guys were gonna ask me what I'm about to ask you, I'd run.

                So if anybody wants to run, I understand.

                Geoff: Here come the Raptors again.

                They're making it look easy on a breakaway.

                Slam dunk by Vince Carter.

                The Raptors are red hot in this one.

                Toronto already leading by  

                and here they come again.

                The question the Knight fans are asking

                is "where the heck is Calvin?"

                Here come the Knights on offense,

                up from the back court to the front court.

                Tracy Reynolds...

                Calvin: Get him, guys! Come on, tie him up!

                Hey, hey! Stop it!

                Get him, get him!

                Ow! Aah! Stop!

                Stop, I say! Stop!

                Give me the combination to the safe.

                Geoff: He's going towards the basket.

                Windmill slam dunk!

                We better think of something else.

                Get him with those!

                Oh, yeah, get them.

                Those are the hard chess men.

                Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got his head.

                Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's going on?

                Oh, good, oh, good. I am glad to see you.

                All right, yeah, I'm really glad you're here.

                What are you doing?

                I'm getting my sneakers back.

                Let me out of this.

                Wait. No, no.

                Just hear me out, Ox.


                You may hate me, you may hate the world.

                But whatever our differences,

                you're still one of us.

                - Yeah. - Yeah.

                You're not one of him.

                Well, heh heh, don't listen to him.

                No, Ox, don't listen to Bittleman.

                He doesn't even care about you, Ox.

                Oh, right, yeah, I don't care about you.

                Of course I care about you. We're friends, right, man?



                You just let me out of here, you idiot.

                I'm not an idiot.

                - You got that? - OK.

                - OK? - OK!

                Geoff: ... will go on to the NBA play-offs,

                and it will be the first for the Knights...

                Because I'm not the one tied to a chair, am I?

                Geoff: lf Calvin Cambridge is gonna get here,

                he better get here quick. Toronto running away...

                I gotta get back to the game.

                You know, if I was an idiot,

                I wouldn't be able to remember

                the combination to your safe, would I?


                Come on, Ox. Come on, come on.


                Come on, one more time. Come on, one more, one more.

                ... and    left.

                - Yes! - Yeah!

                I'm gonna get you, Calvin!

                I'm gonna get you!


                - Hey! - Whoa!

                - Darn it!

                Whoa! Aaah!


                Ha ha!



                Yeah, Murph!

                Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go!

                See you inside!

                - Good luck, Calvin! - Go get 'em!

                Give me the sneakers, Calvin.

                Your game...

                is over.



                My game is just beginning.

                Geoff: The third quarter comes to an end,

                and the Raptors leading the Knights big

                by    points.

                Woman: Yeah! It's Calvin!

                There he is.

                Ladies and gentlemen, he's here!

                Crowd: Calvin.! Calvin.!

                Geoff: Calvin Cambridge has arrived.

                The crowd reacting as he comes onto the court.

                However, is it too late?

                The Knights are trailing by    points.

                They have never been able to make up

                that kind of a defiicit.

                Calvin, where have you been?

                I'm sorry, coach.

                So am I.

                Nobody shows up after   quarters and plays.

                Sit on the bench.

                Wait a minute, coach. You gotta play Calvin.


                Just listen to me for a minute, OK?

                Now if it wasn't for him,

                we wouldn't be here in the fiirst place.

                Now, listen, we can still do this, but we're gonna need him.

                Now, come on, we started as a team, let's finish as a team.

                Joad: Play the kid.

                We could still win, coach.

                We can.

                Yeah! Yeah!

                Geoff: Here come the Knights.

                Geoff: lf I didn't see it with my own eyes,

                I wouldn't have believed it.

                But they're just one point behind the Raptors in this game.

                We gotta steal the ball on the inbound play.

                And if we don't get the steal, who do we foul?

                They all shoot good free throws, coach.

                Well, we better get that steal. Ready?

                - Players: Break! - Let's go.

                Geoff: The Knights need a steal right here.

                Carter being guarded by Cambridge.

                He comes in with it. And he's got the ball...

                It's stolen by Cambridge.!

                What a big play by the little guy!

                - Wagner: Time-out!


                Geoff: Time-out called by the Knights.

                Oh, no.

                What's the matter?

                I'm done, Trace.

                What do you mean?

                It really wasn't me that was playing.

                It was the sneakers.

                Tracy, the sneakers were magic.

                Now they're gone.

                Come on, now. No.

                Now's not the time for jokes, OK?

                I'm not playing games.

                Listen to me.

                We're gonna need you to win, so you know what you gotta do?

                You gotta be brave.

                I believe in you.

                Coach Wagner: All right. Tracy inbounds to Calvin.

                Calvin, Joad's gonna set you a pick.

                If they double-team you, get the ball back to Tracy.

                Listen, guys.

                Whether we make the play-offs or not, it's gonna be my last game.

                - What?! - What?!

                Player: What are you saying, man?

                I'm ready to be a regular kid again.

                It's what I want.

                Come on, y'all. I got faith in you guys.

                Let's go out, and let's go win this thing, man.

                Come on, now. Let's go. Let's go, let's play.

                Teamwork on  .  ... ... .

                All: Teamwork!

                Geoff: Biggest moment of the season for the Knights.

                It comes in to Calvin Cambridge.

                The little guy goes to the dribble against Vince Carter.

                Drives right, the shake-and-bake...

                It didn't work this time!

                I can't do this.

                What are you doing?

                You can do it!

                Calvin: Shoot it!


                Geoff: The Knights win! The Knights win!

                Ladies and gentlemen,

                the Knights are going to the NBA play-offs

                for the first time in franchise history!



                Play-offs, baby!

                We did it, man!

                Yeah, man, we did.

                Guess I won't be seeing you anymore?

                Hey, Trace, come on, man.

                The press wants to see us, man. Come on.

                Oh, Calvin.

                Congratulations, my dear.

                We're going to Le Cirque to celebrate.

                You'll love the French cooking.


                Um, I'll meet you guys outside at the car, OK?

                Oh, OK.

                All right, dear.

                We're so proud of you.

                Wonderful, just wonderful.

                Play-offs, play-offs!

                Play-offs! Yeah!

                Congratulations, Calvin.

                I'm gonna miss you, coach.

                We're gonna miss you, too.

                But I'm glad you fiinally got what you really needed.

                There'll always be a place on this team for you.

                Thanks, coach.

                Good luck.

                I wonder what's keeping Calvin?


                Never thought you'd turn down the Boyds.

                Me, neither.

                Somehow, it just didn't feel right.

                Welcome back.

                Thanks, Murph.

                Come on.

                So, man...

                you gotta tell me.

                What was the best part about being in the NBA?

                Room service.

                Room service?

                What's room service?

                You're in your hotel room.

                You pick up the phone, you dial  .

                Tell 'em what food you want,

                they'll bring the food up to your hotel room...

                for free.

                Nah. You're just... You're just messin' with me, right?

                Nah, not at all.

                We should have that around here sometime.

                We should.

                We should.

                Room service?


                So now you're telling me

                that after everything that we've been through together,

                that's what you like best?

                Room service?

                What are you doing here?

                I'm here with the team.

                You see, the Knights are sponsoring the home now.

                That's... That's great.

                Guys, guys, uh, a little to the left.

                How's that?

                That's good. Good.

                Reg, whatever happened to the guy that used to run this place? Bittleman?

                No one's seen him since Calvin's last game.

                Something about a bet he didn't have the money to cover.

                There's gonna be a lot of changes around here.

                Yeah. I can see that already.


                Yeah. Too bad you're not gonna be around to enjoy it.

                What do you mean?

                Well, things are going great with the team now.

                Everything's going well with my father.

                I have furniture in the house,

                but still something's missing.

                And I heard it through the grapevine that you're still looking for a father.



                That's great.

                Because what I'm missing is a son.

                Thanks... Dad.


                Hey, Murph, come here.

                Um, you know what today is, right?


                It's  -for-  orphan day.

                You take one orphan,

                and then you get another one.

                 -for-  orphan day.

                I mean, if that's OK with you.

                Hey, Murph.

                Hey, T-time.

                You know, I'm gonna take Calvin home with me today.



                But you know what?

                We were kinda hoping that you'd come, too.

                You mean...

                Murph, we're going home.

                We're going home!


                That's right, we're going home.

                - Yeah. - Dad?

                Can we get an allowance?


                - Yeah. Can I drive the Escalade home? - You wanna drive the what?

                Do we get season tickets?

                Tracy: Whoo! Ha ha!

                All right, let's get some sleep, guys.

                Here you go.

                All right. Good night, guys.

                Good night, Dad.

                Good night, Dad.

                Hey, you want me to leave the light on for you?

                Nah, I'm cool.

                What's up, sucka?

                Ha ha ha!

                - Ha ha!

                How was that?

                Which way?

                Lil'Bow Wow:    To across the seas   

                   I'm guaranteed to make everybody bounce with me   

                   Been known to put it down anyplace I be   

                   You can copy but it's only gon'be one me   

                   I don't ride in no...  


                      and I started up a whole epidemic   

                   Look, y'all know what I'm talkin'about   

                   Ever since I hooked up   

                   With the homies down south   

                   TV shows, magazine covers   

                What's her name? Ha ha ha ha ha!

                   Sold out shows, pocket full of cake   

                   What you know about   

                   Selling tres mil at the gate?   

                   I'm the hottest thing around   

                   Neck full of bling bling like the Neptunes'sound   

                   I got it locked on the left, right, front, and rear   


                   This is all I hear   

                   Said Lil'Bow Wow, you just don't know   

                   The way you move so fast across the floor   

                   I mean you run through my mind like all the time   

                   To the point that I just wanna take you home   

                   I said Lil'Bow Wow, you just don't know   

                   The way you move so fast across the floor   

                   I mean, you run through my mind like all the time   

                   To the point that I just wanna take you home   

                   Represent that   

                Thank you very much. Oh, we're cutting?

                I don't even need to cut. Don't cut. Don't cut.

                Yeah, we are.

                Oh, now I gotta act before I play a game.

                I gotta do that again.

                Oh, you want me... Uh, here I come.

                I don't know what he's...

                - Yeah, you're always... - Ha ha ha ha!

                I ain't no actor, man. I'm a basketball player.

                I'm a great actor.


                   They're playing basketball   

                I'm about to drop, I'm about to drop!

                Jermaine dupri:    Yeah   

                   They're playing basketball   

                   We love that basketball   

                -    Yeah    -    Uh-huh   

                Lil'Bow Wow:    Now basketball is my favorite sport   

                   I like the way they dribble up and down the court   

                   I kick it so fresh on the microphone   

                   I like no interruption when the game is on   

                   I like slam dunks that take me to the hoop   

                   My favorite play is the alley-oop   

                   I like the pick-and-roll...   


                   Basketball, bow wow, let's go   

                   They're playing basketball   

                   We love that basketball   

                   Yeah, to the beat,y'all   

                   They're playing basketball   

                   Uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah   

                   We love that basketball   

                Jermaine Dupri:    Now, now, now, now   

                   Now tell me were you in the joint   

                   The night MJ scored    points?   

                   When the Lakers won titles back to back   

                   Didn't give nobody no kind of slack   

                   When Vince Carter came, stuck his arm in the rim   

                   Everybody went crazy in the whole damn gym   

                   Dikembe Mutombo standin'tall   

                   Playin' "D"with desire   

                   It's basketball, sing   

                   They're playing basketball   

                   Uh-huh, all around the world   

                   We love that basketball   

                   Put it up, put it up, put it up   

                   They're playing basketball   

                   We love that basketball   

                Bittleman: Cool, cool. Cool.

                   Just blaze, make it hot   

                Lil'Bow Wow:    Ladies, you walkin'through the mall   

                   And you hear somebody say   

                   You gotta 'turn it back at 'em   

                   And you know what? I gotta do the same thing   

                   Come on   

                   It's that new      car, ladies, fo'sho'  

                   Ha ha, fo'shizzle   

                   It's so so def   

                   All I'm tryin'to do is get my dough on   

                   I'm your boy, you're my girlfriend   

                   Stop on up   

                   I ain't in no kind of rush to grow up, so slow up   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   Let me warn you, girl   

                   Before you get rough with me   

                   You might think you got me but you never really get me   

                   So don't trip if you see me doin'my thing   

                Lil'Bow Wow:    Yo, speak to 'em   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   I'm at the mall on Saturday   

                   I ain't got no cap on my salary   

                   So you know I'm tearin'it up   

                   I'm meetin'so many girls here   

                   Every time I look I see them lookin'back at me   

                   And they sayin' "What up?"   

                   I'm too young to wife up   

                   So you know my game bumpin'   

                   Like baby, let's talk, let's hang, do somethin'   

                   What about them digits? Can I get that?   

                   And here I am, here I am, Bow Weezy, let's go   

                   All I'm tryin'to do is get my dough on   

                   I'm your boy, you're my girlfriend   

                   Sing to me now   

                   I ain't in no kind of rush to grow up, so slow up   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   Let me warn you, girl   

                   Before you get rough with me   

                   You might think you got me but you never really get me   

                   So don't trip if you see me doin'my thing   

                   I told ya   

                   I'm just playin'the game   


                   Playin'the game   

                   Bow Weezy, hey, check it, man   

                   I'm    years old, I just got my tips, you know   

                   I'm on a pace right now, man, I can't be slowing down   

                   I need a girl that's gonna ride with me, man   

                -    Tell 'em    -    So check it   

                   lf you're that girl, come on, come on, come on   

                   Let's go   

                   All I'm tryin'to do is get my dough on   

                   I'm your boy, you're my girlfriend   

                   Stop, hold up   

                   I ain't in no kind of rush to grow up, so slow up   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   Let me warn you, girl   

                   Before you get rough with me   

                   You might think you got me but you never really get me   

                   So don't trip if you see me doin'my thing   

                   I told ya   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   All I'm tryin'to do is get my dough on   

                   I'm your boy, you're my girlfriend   

                   Stop, hold up   

                   I ain't in no kind of rush to grow up, so slow up   

                   I'm just playin'the game   

                   Let me warn you, girl   

                   Before you get rough with me   

                   You might think you got me but you never really get me   

                   So don't trip if you see me doin'my thing   

                   I told ya   

                   I'm just playin'the game   




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