Voila! Finally, the Samurai Fiction
script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Hiroyuki Nakano
movie. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly
transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Samurai Fiction. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally
tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to
drop me a line. You won't
hurt my feelings. Honest.
This is me, three hundred years ago.
My name was Heishiro Inukai. It's a good name.
Three centuries ago Japan was ruled by the samurai.
The Tokugawa Shogunate had united the country,
and it was a time of peace.
I was born the son of a samurai.
At age 21, I met two "ronin", or masterless samurai.
Those encounters changed my life,
and ensured that I remember them to this very day.
Mr. Kazamatsuri, I hope you realize the great honor.
This sword was given to our lord 80 years ago by Tokugawa.
It is a clan treasure used in formal ceremonies.
Guardian of the sword?
If only it were that simple.
Just remember, it's very unusual for
a newcomer such as you attain such an important post.
Do not presume to impose on our lord's good graces.
To be frank,
a newcomer should behave accordingly.
Make sure you fulfill your duty.
Heishiro, a man's mind should be composed at all times.
Haste makes waste. Understand?
I arranged for you to work at the castle with me.
Yet you start a fight with some no-account samurai.
He switched sandals with me!
You've studied fencing, but you've yet to master the samurai spirit.
Why not keep a bird?
It will help you to control your short temper.
Birds belong in the wild.
You don't get it.
These birds are perfectly happy in cages.
Aren't you, dear?
What is it?
A messenger to see you.
I'll be right there.
Before you go up to the castle cut your hair. Look proper.
So, let's call it a draw.
What are you doing?
Just like a child.
What is the problem?
My father was chief councilor to the Nagashima clan,
responsible for all clan affairs.
A problem had arisen.
A samurai, Kazamatsuri, had killed an aide to our lord,
and stolen the precious sword bestowed on us by the Shogun.
We were granted the sword and the domain 80 years ago.
Only we can tell the genuine one from a fake.
What are you suggesting?
Send men after Kazamatsuri.
In the meantime, have a duplicate made.
A fake? Why not just get the real sword back?
We must consider many things.
The young lord's attainment ceremony approaches.
Without the sword, there will be hell to pay.
It could even lead to disbandment of the clan.
We must pretend that it was not stolen.
Kazamatsuri came into our employ in a very dramatic fashion.
I seek vengeance for my son.
What'll we do, boys?
Good looking woman.
It'd be a waste to kill her.
Kill the old man and then enjoy her!
Prepare to die!
Hey you, I killed her husband, the old man's son.
You wanna protect these poor unfortunates?
What's so funny?
You're a dead man!
Finish him off.
Gladly, good sir!
No! Please don't!
Our lord wanted to observe Kazamatsuri's swordsmanship.
The barbaric urge to watch gladiators battling
has not changed since the Roman era.
Impressed, our lord hired Kazamatsuri as a retainer.
I disagree with your methods, father.
I'll find him and kill him. Farewell.
I have already sent men after him.
You think he'll get away so you ordered up a fake.
Not so loud.
I know I can do it.
While you were away in Edo, he has improved greatly.
I have confidence in my swordsmanship.
I'm eager to match my sword against his.
Where are you this time?
You rang, sir.
Enough of this dropping from the ceiling!
Yes, sir, but old ninja habits are hard to break.
Isn't there anyone else? A bit younger, perhaps?
Yes, I'm always training disciples for just such an occasion.
Would you like to see them, sir?
Yes, that boy may attempt something stupid.
I'd like to have all the angles covered.
Don't try to stop me!
If you go alone, he'll kill you.
Think about it, first.
I'm no coward like you!
I'll kill him.
No, I'll kill him.
I'll use my lance.
Back home? Which way...!
These two have been my best friends since childhood.
Our clansmen dubbed us "The Three Stooges".
Well! I'm nowhere near as stupid as they are.
Stop following me!
This is Tadasuke Kurosawa.
How dare you run ahead of me!
This is Shintaro Suzuki.
You just watch me!
This way, sir.
Any of them catch your eye?
There are so many...
The sea goes on forever!
We often used to come here as boys.
Pick that up!
You approve, sir?
I feel good.
Listen. Did you know that...
Tadasuke is betrothed to Mr. Mukai's daughter.
Is that true, Tadasuke?
I heard you played around in Edo. How were the women?
Don't be stupid. I've no time for women.
You've never had a woman?
You're still a virgin?
Don't get so upset! I haven't, either.
But you soon will.
What the hell...!
That's the clan treasure!
You finally showed your true colors.
I've had my suspicions about you.
You're planning to steal it!
I'm merely having a look.
A likely story!
You're a lying thief!
Alright Kazamatsuri, you asked for it!
How did it come to this?
Stop splashing me.
That feels better.
What do you know about Kazamatsuri?
You never know what he's thinking.
They say he's unsociable and conceited.
As a newcomer he was treated distantly.
I saw him just once.
He's got this really scary face.
No, not even close.
But why did he steal the sword?
See. No one can figure him out.
I've got a wanted poster.
Why didn't you say so earlier?
He's a mean one, alright.
He's 190cm tall.
He looks tough, too.
So what! He's no match for me.
That'll teach you!
Really? Now we've got him!
Tadasuke, you stay here.
You have a fiance to consider.
Don't you worry about me.
-Kazamatsuri! -On guard!
I am Heishiro Inukai of the Nagashima Clan.
I am Tadasuke Kurosawa.
He's so scared he's wetting himself!
Don't underestimate us.
Make your move!
Scared, are you?
-Answer me! -Fight!
That's a long leak!
We can't wait!
A disgrace to the samurai. Shame on you!
The clan hired you and in return you stole.
Shame on you!
Are you listening?
Shintaro! Be strong!
Enough! Sheathe your sword.
Please, enough. No more killing, I beg you.
I must insist.
I beg you, sir!
I had no choice.
Yes, I know. But no more.
I'm sorry. It bet it hurt.
I'm really sorry.
You in the shadows, come forth.
I'm going to need some help here.
I understand your problem
but this is going too far. Killing solves nothing.
Please nurse him well.
I'll go back to the domain and make a report.
And don't come back!
Next time he'll kill you for sure.
And your friend here, too.
Swear that you'll never come back.
Hello, Nao. Got time for a cup of tea?
Sir, how would you like to have some fun?
First, a spot of gambling to win some money,
then a whorehouse for some real fun.
What do you say? Good idea, sir?
What the hell are you doing?
The game's starting!
Boss, stop writhing, you're making me miss the spot.
Please stay still.
Another samurai has joined Magobei.
Is that so?
I reckon he's preparing an army to attack us.
Magobei doesn't have the balls to come at us alone.
Only an idiot would recruit that band of incompetents.
But Ma'am, we need more men.
Don't be hasty and end up with dregs.
Leave everything to me.
A superb body.
Turn on your side, please Ma'am.
Put some power into it!
Yes, power, certainly...
Good. Yes, that's the spot.
Not there, you pervert!
But it's such a lovely body.
Ma'am, we've got some ronin out of control.
How interesting. I'll go take a look.
He'll lose these cheating hands!
Let's see you try!
You just watch it!
Gentlemen, I think that's quite enough.
Don't tell me a woman runs this show!
That's all very interesting,
but you run a crooked house, lady.
Any trouble here and we feed you to the crows.
Any man. Be he samurai or lord!
In here, Mr. Samurai.
We'll leave it at this for today.
I'll take over here.
We're honored, Ma'am.
Yes, why not.
Then place your bets.
Place your bets.
Odds or evens.
The betting is closed.
Luck wasn't with you today, was it?
Please come again.
Sir, you're welcome to stay as long as you like.
How do you feel?
I'm Hanbei Mizoguchi. We met on the road.
What about my two friends?
The one called Suzuki is fine.
We had no room. Another family took him in.
His injuries were slight and he's gone home.
Good. Shintaro was saved.
Don't. Your wound will open again.
Are you hungry?
No appetite means you must stay in bed.
You're not ready to get up.
My daughter, Koharu.
You've been unconscious for two days.
You were in great pain that first night. We were worried.
I'm in your debt.
Are you sure you won't eat something?
I'll make some gruel.
Those were the hardest days of that life.
I was so ashamed, I just wanted to curl up and die.
Open your mouth, please.
Father, your tea is getting cold.
Give him hell!
What a woman!
Here you are, sir. Let me refill your cup.
All the samurai I've known were totally useless.
I've never met a swordsman of your caliber.
You're ever so strong, sir.
Let's take a bath.
Sir, you really shouldn't joke so.
I was asking him.
Heishiro, don't go.
I'll go kill him!
No, you mustn't.
You must get well first.
Don't stop me. I must avenge Tadasuke's death.
You can't do anything until you're well.
If you fight him now, he'll only beat you again.
But you agree with me, don't you father?
Regardless, stay in bed for now.
Perhaps I can be of some assistance.
I appreciate it.
But you must not kill Kazamatsuri.
There must be no more killing.
There are other means to recover the sword.
No! He dies!
Look at that!
It's so huge!
Sir. Do you like the sea?
Yes, I do.
Me, I love the sea.
Can I ask you something?
How many men have you killed?
Please tell me, sir.
Gosuke, how many women have you slept with?
I've lost count.
Take it off.
We'd better get going.
Wait for me.
Don't touch that!
You'll break out in a rash.
From just brushing against it?
It's an herb.
It makes an excellent medicine.
Is that so? You're so knowledgeable.
I shouldn't be wasting time like this.
All this talk of killing and revenge
is not helping you to recover.
Look at the beautiful clouds.
Be careful. It's slippery.
I slipped first.
But it was fun.
This is a lovely place.
In autumn we get wild grapes.
Are you alright?
I wonder what caused that?
But it really is delicious.
We had so much fun up on the mountain today.
We rolled around together, like this.
Please let me explain.
We went there to pick herbs together.
Koharu slipped first.
l, worried she may get hurt, extended my hand.
As a result we both fell.
If I got hurt out there it wouldn't really matter.
But if Koharu did, you'd think ill of me.
Why are you both looking at me like that?
We escaped with just a mud-bath, that's all.
So that's all it was?
We got totally covered in mud.
I'm relieved no one was hurt.
Would you care for a drink?
No, thank you. I don't drink.
Even a whiff of it floors me for days.
If you say so...
Did I tell you about his nosebleed?
You rang, sir?
How is my son?
According to the report,
he's sufficiently recovered to gather herbs with a maiden.
A young girl?
Silly boy! Whatever is he thinking?
Enough about him. Where is the sword?
Still with Kazamatsuri.
That was wonderful music.
Tell us all the latest news from town.
The Takatsume gang in town...
Some wild ronin called Kazamatsuri joined them.
Kazamatsuri, you say?
You must have heard. He chopped up those gamblers.
Heishiro, you mustn't!
It's not wise.
Try another way. Ask him to give it back.
Talk to the man. He'll understand.
He's no man! I'll kill him.
Yes! But get him when he's drunk.
Persuade him to turn over a new leaf.
You mustn't! He'll kill you first!
I'll go talk to him. You wait here.
Some hot sake, please.
Is Mr. Kazamatsuri here?
You're a friend?
I wouldn't say friend, but...
My name is Hanbei Mizoguchi.
I'm the petty samurai he attacked out on the road.
He'll remember me.
Attacked by Kazamatsuri, you say?
Then he's after revenge, idiot!
I'm sorry for any imposition.
Persistent little bugger!
Out you go!
Mr. Kazamatsuri! Are you there?
Out with you!
I didn't mean to...
I merely wish to see Mr. Kazamatsuri.
So sorry. Let me pull it out.
Are you alright?
Be careful. You'll hurt yourself.
That's quite enough.
Swords can be very dangerous. Be careful.
I'll come back when Mr. Kazamatsuri's not indisposed.
Who on earth was that?
Begging your pardon.
We have a favor to ask.
You two again?
We are to escort Heishiro back to the domain.
In that case, I'm happy to help.
But on one condition.
You carry him. He stinks.
How could you?!
He's suffering so!
I had no choice.
I made him throw up, so he just needs sleep.
By the way...
I've been thinking of enlarging my business for a while now.
You could be a great help.
And I'd be much happier with a larger territory.
Don't you agree?
So skillful, but hidden away in the boondocks. Why?
Because I'm a member of the underworld.
Totally different from those solid citizens.
Hanbei Mizoguchi, a master swordsman, indeed.
Why do you hide yourself away?
An era of peace? Damned Shogunate!
How do you feel now?
I thought I'd die.
You poor thing.
I went to see Kazamatsuri.
Why didn't you tell me earlier?
So many ruffians there, I never even got to talk.
But I did meet a good ally.
Why are you here?
I swapped a fake for this, the real sword.
Your father has suffered a heart attack.
What? Father is ill?
You must return immediately.
First I must kill Kazamatsuri.
So you say, but it was you who almost died.
-I won't fail again! -You will!
No time to argue, sir.
We'll watch Kazamatsuri while you're away.
I can't go back empty-handed.
Nothing will be gained if you lose your life.
Your friend will have died in vain.
Your duty is to take the sword back.
You don't understand!
You can kill him any time.
No, killing is...
Father, shut up. You're complicating matters.
On horseback you could be home in three days.
I'll get a horse in town.
Get ready to travel.
You have but one father.
We really have no choice.
Sorry you must spend your savings on me.
We weren't talking about money.
I'll find you a good horse.
You should be getting ready.
I'll make lunch in a little while.
How long have you lived like this?
Since I was this big.
Doesn't your father wish to work as an official?
He's not the kind of man to push himself forward.
Various lords have tried to recruit him.
Actually, he was once hired as a martial arts instructor.
But being too modest can sometimes be offensive.
Yes, I quite agree.
He hasn't elaborated, but he's always felt awkward with others.
I really don't want him to be employed by some lord.
But if he receives a stipend from a lord and master,
he must draw his sword for the lord's sake.
I don't want him to fight.
I think he feels the same.
You don't resemble each other, but
you both have gentle hearts.
Actually I'm not his real daughter, you know.
I was an orphan. He adopted me and raised me here.
Blood relationships are of no importance to me.
I regard him as my real father.
Help me peel these.
Pull this bit off, like this.
"Shinkage Fencing School Grand Hall"
"Shinkage Fencing School Grand Hall"
May I help you?
I have heard of Master Kajii's reputation.
I'd appreciate a match with him.
It is customary to have a match with a disciple first.
Yes, I know.
Sorry about this, Koharu.
Since your master appears to be indisposed,
I'll accept a small sum instead.
It may seem rude to ask...
... but why did he adopt you in the first place?
Well... you see...
Take good care.
I'll be back soon.
Good weather, isn't it?
I was relieved to hear you're going to the whorehouse.
We were worried that you might be one of them.
I don't want a woman.
You two go and have some fun.
Really truly? Thank you so much.
I'll just watch.
A touch more.
Just a touch, I said!
Look, the Pony Express.
... in the saddle.
He's coming back.
It's councilor Inukai's lad.
How is my father?
Something wrong with him?
I heard he had a heart attack.
No way! He's full of beans.
Only yesterday he cussed me out something fierce.
They tricked me!
Take this to him!
The ancestral sword! But sir...
They tricked me!
Let us begin! Come on, everyone.
Alright then, lads. Who'll be first?
Here you go.
Who's next? You want to try?
C'mon, let's go.
Let's have a duel.
It's a penny a try.
I meant a real match.
Why so eager to cross swords with me?
It's perfectly natural for a master swordsman to fight.
I admit you're better. Isn't that enough?
Will you return the sword to that young noble?
You mean Inukai?
He's the stupid son of an hereditary councilor.
Such an idiot can succeed to important positions.
That's the way of the world.
If he raises a hand to me again,
I'll chop the damn thing off.
If you agree to a match with me, I'll return the sword.
Let's make some plum brandy and sell it.
So many plums this year.
Falcon deceived me. The rat!
He must have had good reason to.
Kazamatsuri had reason to take the sword, too.
He killed father's attendant and stole it.
Plus he killed Tadasuke.
If you try to stop me, I'll never forgive you.
How about another helping?
I think I know how to beat Kazamatsuri.
Don't get too close. Throw stones.
With swords, you've no chance against him.
A surprise attack would never work.
I threw stones at him and saved your life.
Y... yes, but...
You remember, don't you?
Don't denigrate stones!
Throw them at him like rain.
Then hit him with a big stick. That's it.
No need to kill him.
I understand! Thank you.
I get it.
What are you doing?
Off your knees!
Stretch that arm.
Tuck in your chin.
That you, Okatsu?
How did you know?
The wind brought your scent to me.
I'm pleased that you recognize my smell.
This sword must be very dear to you.
It's nothing but an ornament. Take it if you want.
I don't want a sword.
You deserve more than a mere samurai's life.
Why not quit your rank...
and help me to take over this area?
You'll wear fine clothes.
As many women as you like.
A life of luxury awaits you.
Don't make a sound.
Kazamatsuri is too much for you to handle.
He's a criminal who spits on the Shogunate.
What did he do?
In that brocade sheath is a treasured gift from the Shogun.
If you do as I say, you will live.
The reward is 1,000 in gold.
Is this a trick?
Mix this into his drink.
You're doing very well.
No, I need more practice.
Let me help you.
No need to. I can do it myself...
But I want to help you.
Let me take this.
It's too heavy for you.
Are you alright?
Another nosebleed. Practicing too hard, perhaps?
Too much can hurt you.
Aren't you respectful today? How unusual.
What are you making?
To fling into his eyes.
Good with rice balls, too.
Aren't you the early-bird?
How about a wake-up dram?
Will you marry me?
I'm very flattered.
I was serious.
That's not very nice.
But really... It's all so sudden.
A woman needs time to think things over.
I'm a woman who's killed all manner of men.
Even trumped up little samurai like you!
No stray dog is going to give me any cheek.
How did it come to this?
What was that?
Stones, stones. A sword is no way to win.
I graduated from a fencing school.
How proud you must be.
I've heard you once taught at a fencing school.
For all outward appearances.
Too much modesty brings others' hatred.
You're a skilled swordsman.
Yet you stop me from killing Kazamatsuri.
Killing is wrong.
That's what swords are for.
Don't you wear yours when you go to town?
For what other possible reason?
I'm ashamed to say...
I still cling to the hope of being employed as an official.
But let me make one thing clear!
Martial arts are not about killing!
I don't understand.
Why do you stop me from killing a wicked man like him?
I killed a man once.
He was Koharu's father.
Koharu's real father was named Ryunosuke Kuzumi.
Fifteen years ago
the fief I belonged to had a border dispute
with a neighboring clan.
I was a guard there,
under orders to kill anyone crossing the border.
Kuzumi had a similar duty for his clan.
In the river, which was claimed by both clans,
I met Kuzumi and we crossed swords.
The first time I killed a man.
I was overwhelmed by guilt.
Grant me a favor.
Kuzumi had a young daughter.
A widower, his last words were of regret for his daughter.
l, a single man at the time, left the fief and adopted her.
But not from sympathy or guilt.
I decided to rectify the sin I had committed,
by raising the child of the man I had killed.
As she grew up, I realized a truth...
One must cherish life and live it to its end.
That is a man's duty.
As a young man I was very conceited.
Proud of my fencing skills and afraid of nothing.
I would have likely ended up like Kazamatsuri.
The human spirit contains both good and evil.
Even those who seem evil have some good in them.
Even Kazamatsuri may change.
Only the gods should take a person's life.
I've said too much.
Does Koharu know that you killed her father?
Yes, I told her.
Tell Mizoguchi to fight me if he wants to get Koharu back.
Kazamatsuri has got Koharu!
Prepare to die Kazamatsuri!
You take care of Koharu.
No! Don't get too close.
I see though your mask hiding anger and thirst for revenge.
It is as plain as day to me.
You'll wear that mask till your dying day.
But you will cross swords with me this day!
I accept the challenge.
Draw your blade!
Your father will surely win.
You will be my wife.
Mizoguchi will be my father.
It's all decided!
Falcon, protect her.
Don't die! I'll never forgive you.
Stay back. Don't get too close!
It was an honor to have fought you.
And that was how Kazamatsuri went out of my life.
No trace of anger, no resentment, did he let show on his face.
As I prayed for him, I felt something greater...
... watching over me from above.
When a man abandons ego and obstinacy, he can accept the gods
and learn how to truly love.
It took me a long time to realize that essential truth.
The most important thing is to give your all until the very last.
You rang, sir.
You rang, sir.
We just felt like calling you.
I shaved my pate and became an official.
I married Koharu, who softened both father's temper and mine.
How does that feel?
Right, my pretty?
Red Shadow quit the ninja and became a maid to Koharu.
Mizoguchi became clan secretary and sheathed his sword forever.
Hard at it, eh?
Oh yes, about the sword...
There's no sign of his body.
Probably swept down river.
He couldn't have survived.
What shall we do?
The sword in the river is the real one.
The sheath was over there.
Then the sword must be directly below!
Here it is!
Can you swim?
We'll soon find out.