The Warriors Remake: Is Walter Hill Spinning In His Grave?

Okay, Walter Hill isn't dead per se but if you look at his IMDB filmography, he ain't exactly been alive either if you get my drift. I've had a quite a few people ask me what I think of this upcoming remake of The Warriors, and I always reply with "The Patty Smyth rendition will always be #1 in my heart."

This has led to my being on the receiving end of many near-fatal beatings.

Seriously though, it'll be a serious uphill climb to for a The Warriors redux to work. First off, the original was gritty and almost surreal in its execution. After all, I used to live in New York, but I never did come across any whupass mimes or gussied-up bat wielding psychopaths. Perhaps I run with the wrong crowd.

But anyway, the new director Tony Scott is the exact opposite of gritty; his movies are slicker than Michael Douglas' hair in Wall Street. Also, according to HSX this one is going to feature "martial arts action rather than traditional street gangland warfare."

Say what?

It's a movie about gangland warfare, you fools! There are literally a gazillion martial arts action flicks, and only a handful of good old-fashioned gang movies using switchblades, chains, pipes, bottles and other assorted weapons that require no formal training. And no, I don't count any movie with singing and dancing with truckloads of subtext as a true gang movie, for the record.

So yeah, needless to say I've got some hesitation about this one. On the other hand, Tony Scott has never really made an unwatchable film, so here's to hoping he keeps his streak alive. And Tony, since I know you're an avid reader of this about Vincent Gallo as Luther? Who better to play the epitome of creepy and insane than Mr. Gallo, I ask you?

And regardless of how this new flick winds up being, did you see they're making a set of The Warriors action figures? The 1979 version, natch. It truly warms my heart to think of some kid out there playing with a Luther action figure, taunting Barbie with his repetitive cry of "Baaaaaaaarbie! Come out to plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"

Related tune: The Warrior By Scandal (Real Audio via

posted by drew on 11/22/2004

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Obviously, I'm not trying to re-invent the movie blog wheel here. I'm just never lacking in opinions about movies, pop culture, news, and other assorted hoohah. And my mailman has put a restraining order on me, so here's my place to vent.

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